PODCAST · society

Petrichor And Pollen

by Rachelle Roubique

I’m Rachelle. Twenty years ago, in an effort to be anywhere but here, I sailed out of Baton Rouge, Louisiana on a replica of one of Christopher Columbus’ ships.  I was determined to head south until the water was blue, the sand was white, and steel drums were playing in the background. Then after dozens of  islands,  several hurricanes,  ventures into academia, law school, and more "chances of a lifetime," than any one person should have, a rare and incurable disease has left me questioning not only the point of existence, but also how much we should be forced to endure before finally giving in to the urge to end it all. How do you make yourself keep going when every single thing you’ve used to navigate life has been stripped away? What happens when you become a complete liability? Where do you go for help when you have nothing to offer in return?  When is death the most civil solution? Is life really worth all of this pain?That's what I'll try to figure out