Ramjack

It's time for an easy going chat about these precious final few days of LOST. Jacob:Slack-Jawed Gorilla or Mentally Handicapped Neandertal which side are you on? Crazy moms is sorry for the rock she's about to put through your skull. Jacob's Aryan dreams = watch out Miles. Helmets, will you?

Dove promises go awry, the military is training robots to be afraid of us, revolutionary sixth grade game, Stop Molesting children, 5and2 Dramatic Reading “letter to a young girl”, outdoor cats don’t have a chance, silent 7’s, , well , adventures in drugs and driving.

It's an Easter Spectacular! Welcome back baby jeezo. Dove Promises, Wisconsin are you ok? Ladies get a 5and2 slap to the mouth, meanwhile Catholics keep protecting wacko preds, A pocket for the 21st century, orangutan's love hot tub danger sex, Pet adoption fan-fiction, We take baby jeezo to ikea and then introduce him to internet porn.

Dove Promises return and teach us to Inner-Jog, Colorado Libraries are the worst, Anna Martinez, Where are you? Sarah Palin is campaigning to be the new 4th godhead. MHC = the Slut Factor. Catholic douchebaggery, Apathy is the worst. Movie Theater Complaints, Twilight: New Moon, And Hoarders introduces us to a rascal and scalawag named Jim, and nothing will ever be the same. This ep is full out 10 cent piece.

Another LOST special episode in which we speculate about the past and future of the Polar Bears, Sawyer and Miles "partnership", and Kate's inability to drive. Now with 400% more haikus!

Fashion forward, Cyrus Family Secrets, Asexual Lady Ants, Racist Jap Bees, We play Jeezo, Shroud, Albino , the 5and2's raise the dead, Elderly Server Farms Solve the Energy Crisis, Diesel gets stupid, Hoarding chrismas and mad vampire fashions. You best put on your science pants!

Stealing a KJ for the 5and2 set, baby tat's for Jeezo, 4and2 is the new Asian, The Folgers Coffee Company is a bastion of antiquated ideas about gender roles and societal obligations, Chiropractors in Connecticut, Nerd Ladies abound, and a bedazzled situation room for a new year. Hey Humanity, Stop Resting on your Laurels in 2010!

It's a special mini-episode and we explore the spoils of the Lost Final Season Sweepstakes. Note: Contains Minor Spoilers if you have had your head completely in the sand. Brad's Life completely intersects with the Lost and he loses grip with reality. We also explore new means of product placement, possible Polar Bear pairings, and Lost Spin-off sitcoms. It's a full out Island Adventure Bonanza! Go Pinus!

Employ-of-the-month: FAIL. The science behind tiny sensitive hands is explored. Does the number four exist? Ask the 4and2'ers and prepare for an onslaught of idiocy. Surprise! Stress is not new. News Dealers are in your neighborhood and they are dealing news, to your KIDS! Drink Recipes for a new year. Build-a-bear-voodoo-Frankenstein-workshop is out to make a Horcrux from your toddler's soul and there are people out there that want to steal those souls. BEWARE! We bring class with a Ramjack Dramatic Reading of the insanely awkward "Poetry of the Fae" The Situation Room is laden with faeries, thievery, bots, and guests. Be careful with unparliamentarily language, lest you lose your position.

Mail an Octopus for the new year, The Final Martha Stewart promises, an Oraganic Xmas = revolting, Walmart Drive Though, The happiest place doesn't know any better, Gray-haired tweens are disturbing the natural order of everything, Hey Internet bitches, let me have my spring roll in peace, Star Wars Holiday Special presents Wookie Porn and Maude The Next Generation.

Hey you lazy fucking faux-cripple-scooter-bitch-people stop trying to see through your brain bones, because there's a 20 watt fountains in our brain that can't die, thus proving the axiom time minus time equals no time, and that's what we've got for you. NO TIME. This week brings more tips from martha, our plan to protect the Postal Service, Sarah Palin Kettlecorn's the Native Americans, Ellen Page is constantly confounded by technology and the people that understand it better than she ever will, and the Situation room leads to more fams getting turned into dinos.

The Macy's Pride/Christmas/White man oppressing Native Americans Parade, Martha Stewart bitchslap's Sarah Palin, Carly Simon apparently didn't die in 1929, Alex extols the virtues of "cooking" pre-cooked food out of plastic bags, we talk about some wild and wacky commercials from 1989, watch Garfield Thanksgiving and Christmas, Muppet Family Christmas, Jingle All The Way, and Return to Sleepaway Camp (to clear the palate). And the cruel hand of fate falls harshly on Rex and Rita Readasaurus.

Finders Keepers, Losers Weepers,it's a lucky 21 Thanksgiving super spectacular! Martha Stewart News, Alex curls up with his Hagen-daz and bunny slippers to give us a "Gossip Girl" and "90210" update, Brad Discovers "Sell This House" and learns what love is. Thanksgiving fun facts: Suprise! Pilgrims are corn stealing bastards. Plus the Christmas Creep continues his conquest of the calender. Send us drawings of your fears and favorite celebrities.

Blockbuster is banking on magic to save them, sadly magic is out. Peter Cottontail has a cock on his back, a cock for science! A deranged Martha Stewart becomes our Celebrity Project Child of the month. Brad watches Inglorious Bastards and Venture Bros. And Alex watches his lady shows Gossip Girl and 90210. And who's conning who in the 1990 Dana Carvey masterpiece Opportunity Knocks. Beware the Christmas Creep Bitches. The Podcast is free for the listening, try my product PLEASE!

Lion OR Lying. Willie Ames is back in charge and he's going to zap your Roth IRA, An IMDB message board dramatic reading. Shows: Tswift on Snl, Parking Wars and more. Spacial reasoning for dummies, and a tasty haze of vicodin and muscle relaxers gently guide us into the situation room, where nothing will ever be the same. what would you do?

Episode 18 is here and it’s legal! Time to rock the vote. We finish our October Halloween extravaganza, receive a special poem, check in on Taylor Swift, discuss Halloween safety for you, your costumes, and your yard haunt, and who doesn’t love an old fashioned yard haunt? We watch Garfield’s Halloween adventure, run into a Situation Room of Horrors & take a scary “ride on the internet”, , opposed to the cyber-web-net-space. Don’t forget to check your scorecard and your base system. Candy, Candy, Candy!

It’s Spooktacular! Taylor Swift: Globe Trotter, Freemdom Stars: make your own! Spiders want to destroy our economy, Hey Kristen Stewart take a bath and shut the fuck up, Rush Limbaugh shutdown, Old people call phone sex line: Viva Viagra indeed, Oregon Trail becomes reality, a reality Karen Armstrong has no grasp of. We deal with our deep childhood fear of aliens and watch Ernest Scared Stupid now with 175% more trolls than your average Troll Movie.

The pretty pretty princess has landed, and nothing will ever be the same. It's the Ramjack Super Sweet Sixteen, so of course we have Miley and Taylor Swift updates, circumcisions, scaring and AIDS: What you need to know. Watch out for evil Alex from the future because he's out, about, and here to party. Body language experts are one step from being Sylvia Brown, Deal breakers 101. We watch Creepshow and learn more about the great tradition of writers turned old prospectors. Visit an epic Halloween Situation Room and Brad relates the epic stripper roadtrip adventure of 2009. I want my cake!

Alex survives his pumpkin woes, Brad is being traumatized by terrible motivational speakers and unfathomably stupid business decisions. We are getting ready for the Halloween Creep while living a prepared lifestyle.

New Fall Decor is dropping and we are expecting all out chaos. We begin making our plans to infiltrate the Bass Pro Shop pyramid to harness all the powers of the Creepy Holler with our ceremonial Moonpie Dagger.

Where were you when he was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died? Happy Holidays! We kick off the season by discussing the Holiday Classic "Madame Web"

Alex has some not-so-new ideas for dental treatment. Brad has some interesting new treats for those who receive. Alex ventures to a pop mart to locate a Pazuzu Labubu. People are Ticked Off! but those people also read the Bridge column of the Newspaper.

Alex explains all of the legal gray areas with drones and Brad catches up on all the movies. T and T 3x15 “The Butler Duet” puts T.S. undercover to protect a rich lady and her bird from a problem she created.

Join us for some sage monthly career advice and/or banishments and please leave those stuffed animals at home. T and T 3x14 “Mr. Big” puts Fritz and Nobby on trial for being criminal masterminds.

Alex has returned from doing whatever he wants in Mexico without stealing art and Brad has encountered the worst dessert ever. We explore DNA quantum binding with Joe Camel on the astral plane.

Welcome to The Undertone a podcast recorded bit by bit over the course of a week. Who is the best marathon mascot? Moneys are loving crystals and trying to harness their power in all 3 bodies. T and T 3x13 “The Curse” gives us an amazing fake funeral that teaches us to hate cops even more than usual.

It’s a creepy casual episode as Alex is getting a pitch from his doctor. Brad and Dan report in on the latest antics of small children forced into haunted house labor at Sir Henry’s. Grab your favorite Eldritch Candy and enjoy.

Alex reports in on the latest libertarian techdunce literature from Middle School dropout turned Fanfiction writer/cult inspirer Eliezer Yudkowsky. Meatloaf and apple pie are back on the menu. T and T 3x12– “Terri’s Flame-Thief of Heart” brings back Smilin’ Ryan and gives us a town full of people desperate to be scammed.

We meet some disturbing new friends with the return of “Strange Addict… or Smells like a Halibut. T and T 3x11– “A Place in History” introduces us to Phony Squealer Cut-man and make sus wonder how much brain damage Teri has sustained.

Alex discovers some very questionable new tech and Brad checks in on the latest Avatar for some reason and also the murder-chimp thriller “Primate”. T and T 3x10 – “Silent Witness” asks the important question are deaf people basically just dogs? And we are all voting Teddy Bear in the metro elections.

We give an important Crazy Doozy 2026 updates including Magic, technology, and Moonpies. T and T 3x09 - “Movie Madness” brings back Fritz and Nobby and truly amazing scheme of romance, disaster, and boxing.

We are in a post-holiday casual episode. Alex is laden in pants and delivering chairs from Santa. We summon some rain using a creepy chant and explore solo board games. Also David Lynch communes with the spirit of the Dark Phoenix.

Join us as we travel back in time to a preholiday era. Alex reports on Texas antics and phony cops. We take a look at Israeli “comedy” and black Friday juicers. Why are still changing time and is this affecting our brown core bananas?

It’s a holiday spectacular in which we delve into some Gary Busey holiday meal plans. Brad and Dan get holiday spooks via questionable child labor laws. We discuss the Amazon original movie “Merv” which is about a cute dog for the first hour then is just depressing.

Chris joins us as we delve into the kooky comedy/horror film House (1985) in which a house snatches the greatest American war heroes child because some soldiers that went to Vietnam just cannot get enough of being the worst.

Dick Cheney is dead and Zohran Mamdani is mayor of New York. We are celebrating the post spooky season with gusto, tactical birken bags for tier one operators, and artisanal sardines. Also, we look forward to some very questionable recipes for your holiday tables.

It’s a truly spooky non-casual episode as we avoid local Ohio soap operas to delve into Tales From The Darkside 3x05 “The Geezenstacks” and 4x16 “Family Reunion” and have a run in with the frightful GabaGhoul.

It’s a true spooktacular as we discuss the all the terrifying antics from Alex’s trip to Orlando for a Horror Nights. Terrifying tales of ceilings, and Extra-Terrestrials, taxidermy, and (presumably) Roy lurk within.

Spooky times are underway and monsters are truly everywhere Brad reports in from Horror Nights and Alex is learning about the terror of the double derecho. No tax holiday for moonpie knives?! Scandalous.

Alex has been menaced by jets and robots, but not the spirits of the fourth and/or fifth most famous of the Marx Brothers, Brad is being menaced by overly confusing youtube videos and the shockingly low efforts of a pro-genocide cola company and a world class theme park.

Alex returns from his summer travels. Brad is doing stressful theme park math. We discuss the Christian Film “Quigley: An Angelic Tail” AKA “Daddy Dog Day” a movie in which Gary Busey is reincarnated as a dog to perform the dark rituals of an evil deity while promoting Hawaiian Punch based decor.

Can Ivermectin kill all the little venoms in your system, also can I borrow some money? We discuss the Hallmark Mystery: Jazz Ramsey A K-9 Mystery a true classic as we kick off dog/reincarnation month.

It’s a casual episode. Brad has become a personification of trauma after having watched “Bring Her Back” Alex reports in on the latest from Kings Island. We check in our creepy pals and the latest from Ticked Off! Old people and meet an ugly little apple picking boy.

Everything is very normal and reasonable in the United States. Alex reports in on dogs learning to swim. Brad is paying the price for making fun of Claire. T and T 3x08 “The Mysterious Mauler” has T and T investigating some absolutely baffling wrestling shenanigans.

We take a creepy quiz and learn about the popularity of pendulums. Can you contact the Keebler Elves in the Hollow Tree Factory through the ether via a scrying bowl? T and T 3x07 “A Lesson in Values” has Terri taking on the case of a tax-dodging hobo who dies leaving his estate to his wildly uninterested traveling pal.

We discuss the latest reports on America’s most braindead-ogre Senator and give some advice. T and T 3x06 “Take my Life, Please” takes us to the worst comedy club imaginable. Can we find something more niche than a guy that only does Mob jokes? Absolutely.

Crimes are all around mostly caused by radon gas taking out children and people trying to take a vacation from their vacation. T and T 3x05 “Decker’s Ex” introduces us to a some truly shocking fashion crimes and implies Decker’s ex-wife is working for the mob and possibly a murderer.

It’s a casual episode in which we learn about our coffee personalities and check in with the Mormons to learn if sinful handholding will get your temple parking validated. Alex updates us on Minecraft and Black Mirror.

We are back, Alex has survived an assassination attempt by a shifty Tennessee waitress. Brad has seen a movie about a personified manifestation of trauma and depression because it’s 2025. We watch the first tv movie of Lexx 1x01 “I Worship His Shadow” it’s absolutely awful and I’m angry to even have to type this sentence describing it.

Welcome to a super spooky episode 666. Chris joins us as we explore the hidden terrors of local municipal elections, the nightmarish riddle of buying random keys from grifters on a website, and Borris Karloff’s birthplace. We discuss Andrew Divoff giving a masterclass in scenery chewing in the truly amazing “Wishmaster 2: Evil Never Dies”