Redesign Your Marriage | Joe and Shelby Seeley

Have you ever noticed how gyms are packed in January… and empty by mid-February? Joe shares from his own experience as someone who works out consistently six days a week. Every January, the classes are full. Parking lots are packed. But by mid-February? Empty. The excitement fades when people realize goals actually require a price. Inspiration gets you started—but commitment carries you forward. February is when you discover whether it was just a dream or an actual goal. Goals require sacrifice, effort, discomfort, and sometimes pain. They require you to become someone different in order to receive something different. The real question becomes: who will we become on the other side of this goal? We also talk about accountability—and why being accountable only to your spouse doesn't always work. Sometimes reminders can feel like nagging. That's why coaches, trainers, financial advisors, and mentors matter. They aren't emotionally attached to your excuses. They help you course-correct instead of quit. They celebrate small wins. They remind you of your "why." Joe shares a powerful story from coaching men—helping them identify their spouse's top three needs and then taking action on them immediately. Not next month. Not when it feels convenient. Now. One man resisted buying flowers because he thought it was a waste of money. But when he chose commitment over preference, it softened his wife's heart instantly. That's the power of aligned action. So what do you do when January didn't go as planned? Release the shame. Reset expectations. Reframe. Take the next step. Don't drag disappointment into the rest of the year. You're not behind—you may just be unaligned. Adjust the rhythm. Extend the timeline if needed. But don't quit. LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 – Why goals die in February 0:40 – The packed January gym phenomenon 1:20 – Inspiration vs. paying the price 2:00 – Is it a goal… or just a dream? 3:00 – Why accountability can't just be your spouse 4:00 – Goals require sacrifice and effort 5:00 – Don't grow weary in doing good (Galatians) 6:00 – Who do you become on the other side? 7:00 – Why coaches and trainers matter 8:00 – Course correct, don't quit 9:00 – You're not behind, you're unaligned 10:00 – Eating the frog first (reprioritize your schedule) 11:00 – Small wins create momentum 12:00 – Counting the cost of not reaching your goals 13:00 – Coaching example: serving your spouse's top 3 needs 14:30 – The flowers story: commitment over preference 16:00 – Release shame. Reset. Reframe. 17:00 – Free coaching call invitation

In today's episode, we're continuing the vision conversation we started in part one. These next five questions felt heavier—but in the best way. They forced us to slow down and really assess what season we're in, what we're being asked to step into, and what might need to be released so we can move forward with clarity and unity. Vision isn't just about dreaming—it's about making room. We start with a big question: What opportunities are we being called to step into, and what do we need to let go of to make room? This one surfaced a lot for us. God rarely adds without asking us to release something, and we've learned that holding onto old things—relationships, commitments, habits—can actually become obstacles in the next season. Just because something was good doesn't mean it's meant to come with you forever. Timing matters, and not every opportunity is a now opportunity. Next, we talk about finances and what financial freedom actually looks like for us. This conversation has evolved over 27 years of marriage. Financial freedom isn't just a number—it's emotional, relational, and deeply tied to trust and shared values. We share how our focus has shifted from trading time for money to creating sustainability, margin, and legacy—not just for our kids, but for generations to come. From there, we unpack boundaries—because strong marriages are protected, not accidental. Boundaries aren't walls; they're gates. In this season, we've learned the importance of accountability, wise counsel, unified decision-making, and having safe people who can speak into our lives. One of our current boundaries is simple but powerful: if both of us don't say yes, it's a no for now. Unity creates safety. We also lean into one of our favorite topics: adventures, experiences, and traditions. Fun is not optional—it's fuel. Shared joy builds resilience, and intentional memories anchor you during hard seasons. From annual family vision trips to spontaneous adventures and weekly family dinners, we talk about how intentionality has shaped our family culture and helped our kids grow with confidence and focus. We close with the final question: What promise do we want to make for this next chapter that will anchor us spiritually and relationally? Promises define direction. They're not about pressure—they're about identity and commitment. We each share the promises we're making to one another and encourage you to revisit your promises too. You're not starting over—you're building forward. Marriage isn't a DIY project, and you don't have to do this alone. LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 – Welcome to part two of the marriage vision conversation 1:00 – Why these questions are forward-facing and harder 2:00 – Question 6: What opportunities are we being called into? 3:00 – Why God asks us to release things before adding new ones 4:10 – New opportunities vs. now opportunities 5:30 – Doing opportunities in unity (we win or learn together) 6:45 – Making room by letting go of relationships or commitments 8:00 – Stepping deeper into coaching and mentoring 9:10 – Question 7: What does financial freedom look like for us? 10:30 – Why money is emotional and reveals values 12:00 – Shifting from trading time for money to legacy thinking 14:00 – Building generational impact, not just provision 15:10 – Question 8: What boundaries protect our marriage? 16:30 – Boundaries create safety, not restriction 18:00 – Accountability, mentors, and unity in decisions 19:30 – Question 9: Adventures, traditions, and intentional fun 21:00 – Why fun is fuel and shared joy builds resilience 22:30 – Family traditions, vision trips, and spontaneous adventures 24:30 – Question 10: The promise we're making for the next chapter 26:00 – Letting go of broken promises from the past 27:30 – Recommitting to covenant and building forward 28:45 – Encouragement to start with one question this week 29:45 – Final encouragement + coaching invitation

In today's episode, we're literally inviting you into our anniversary getaway. Yes… we are sitting in a hotel room, journals spread out everywhere, soaking in the fact that we've been married 27 years. And honestly? We're still learning, still growing, and still asking God to show us what's next for our marriage. We've had so many people ask us lately, "What's your secret? How have you stayed married this long?" So we wanted to take you behind the scenes and share what we're doing right now to redesign our marriage for the next season. One of the biggest keys for us has always been vision. We had vision early in our marriage, and we are convinced that God used that to pull us forward through the hardest seasons. But vision isn't something you set once and forget. Life changes. Kids grow up. New challenges show up. So part of staying connected is coming back to God and asking: "What do You want for our marriage now?" That's exactly what this weekend has been about. We brought new journals, carved out intentional time, and started asking ourselves some big, honest questions. We walk through the first five questions in this episode, starting with: What do we want the next 10 years of our marriage to feel like? And yes, the word feel threw us for a loop at first. But once we slowed down, things got real. Joe shared about wanting integrity, grace, and the kind of spiritual alignment where we're growing beautifully into the next chapter. Shelby shared her vision of a marriage that feels simple, settled, and content—but never complacent. This question brought up emotions, reflection, and such a sweet reminder that we're still building something together. We also talk about habits that make us feel connected—traveling, laughing, praying together, taking walks, and practicing active listening. And on the flip side, we dig into the rhythms that no longer serve us. Things like defensiveness or trying to change each other instead of hearing each other's heart. We talk through conflict honestly—how it doesn't just expose what your spouse is doing wrong, but what's going on inside you, just like James 4 talks about. And honestly? That realization alone has changed so much in our home. Finally, we unpack where we want our health, energy, lifestyle, and legacy to go in the next three to five years. We want to be aligned—spirit, mind, body, even hormones—so we can live fully alive. We want to have the strength and energy to hike, travel, build, and enjoy our family. And we talk deeply about legacy: what will outlive us, how we love, what our kids will remember, and what we want Jesus to look like through our lives. This episode is personal, raw, and honestly one of our favorites. Now we want to encourage you—don't just listen. Grab a journal, sit down with your spouse, and walk through these same questions together. Part 2 is coming next!   LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary: 0:00 – Recording from our anniversary getaway 0:40 – The question everyone asks: "How have you been married 27 years?" 1:10 – Why we chose a simple wellness retreat 45 minutes from home 1:50 – Meeting a woman on the trail who asked us our "secret" 2:20 – Vision journals: the gift Shelby brought for the trip 3:00 – Why vision has carried us through every season 3:35 – Revisiting vision as life and kids change 4:00 – Celebrating what we've already accomplished together 4:30 – When marriages run out of vision, division shows up 5:00 – God's vision vs. our own (Proverbs 29 insight) 5:45 – The 10 questions we're asking each other this weekend 6:10 – Question 1: What do we want the next 10 years to *feel* like? 6:40 – Joe's answer: integrity, grace, and growing beautifully 7:10 – Shelby's answer: simple, settled, content—but not complacent 7:50 – Question 2: What is God highlighting in this season? 8:20 – Slowing down to reflect without judging each other's answers 9:00 – These questions brought up real emotions + honest conversations 9:40 – Why this isn't a to-do list—it's about vision, not pressure 10:20 – Vision for marriage, family, and legacy moving forward 11:00 – Encouragement to do this exercise together 11:40 – Grab journals, sit down, and actually answer the questions 12:20 – Part 2 coming next with the final five questions 13:00 – Join the Redesign Your Marriage community + group 13:40 – Coaching, mentoring, and next-step support 14:10 – One of our secrets to 27 years: never stop having vision 15:00 – Final encouragement: We love you, we believe in your marriage

What would you say to the "year 1–5" version of your marriage? In this conversation, Joe and Shelby look back over 27 years together and share three lessons they wish they'd known at the start—practical, heart-level shifts that would've saved them from a lot of unnecessary conflict and helped them grow faster, together. 1) Listen for understanding (not for your turn to talk). Joe shares how, in the early years, he often listened just long enough to respond—then realized he needed to slow down and truly hear Shelby. They reference James' "quick to listen, slow to speak" posture and the simple counseling exercise of repeating back what you heard to confirm understanding. Their family shorthand helps too: Do you need to be Heard, Helped, or Hugged? (the "3 H's"). 2) Learn to trust—and release control. Shelby opens up about how past trauma made trust harder and fed a need to control "everything," from bills to schedules. The shift came by believing Joe had her best interest at heart and doing inner-heart work (healing) so she didn't carry old baggage into daily life. They also note the Love & Respect "motivation cycle" and how trusting each other's intent (and ultimately trusting God) changed the tone of their home. 3) Choose the right relationships for your marriage. If they could go back, they'd intentionally build a "relationship ecosystem": mentors/coaches ahead of them, friends walking beside them, and younger couples to pour into. They'd also invest money earlier in coaching and conferences rather than assuming marriage resources should be free. As a gut-check, they ask: who are the five couples you spend the most time with? Why this matters right now These three shifts—hearing to understand, trusting instead of controlling, and surrounding your marriage with the right people—don't require a perfect season, just a willing heart and a few repeatable habits. They're the kind of moves that turn daily friction into daily formation. Try this this week Use the 3 H's: before responding, ask your spouse if they need to be Heard, Helped, or Hugged. Identify (and schedule time with) one mentor couple, one peer couple, and one couple you can encourage. When tension rises, practice the repeat-back: "What I hear you saying is…" and confirm before solving.   LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 – We Wish We Knew: 3 Lessons That Could've Saved Us Years 1:00 – Not Stocks…Marriage: From "Buy Bitcoin" to Real Wisdom 2:00 – Lesson 1: Listen to Understand (Not to Reload) 3:30 – The Fix That Works: "Repeat Back" Active Listening 4:50 – The 3 H's: Do You Need to be Heard, Helped, or Hugged? 6:00 – Lesson 2: Trust > Control (Shelby's honest share) 7:30 – Love & Respect Cycle: Why Intent Matters (and trusting God) 10:30 – Do the Heart Work: Inner Healing Early Beats Cleanup Later 11:30 – Lesson 3: Choose Your People (Mentors, Peers, + Who You Pour Into) 12:30 – Invest Like It Matters: Coaching, Conferences, Growth 13:30 – Right Friends, Right Direction (avoid misaligned circles) 14:30 – Pouring Out = Leveling Up (why mentoring helps YOU) 15:30 – Gut-Check: Name Your 5 Couples (your marriage ecosystem) 16:30 – Don't Just Tell Your Younger Self—Apply It Now 17:30 – Your Turn: Share Your One Thing (IG + FB Group) 18:30 – Marriage = Journey, Not Destination (get 1% better) 19:30 – Subscribe + Free Coaching Intro Call (details inside)

Sometimes, the most powerful lessons come not from a sermon or a book, but from a simple moment of quiet observation. In this heartfelt episode of Redesign Your Marriage, Joe and Shelby share a story that stopped them in their tracks—a father carrying his disabled teenage son into a hotel pool, and the sacrificial love that radiated from that moment. This episode is more than a touching story—it's a call to remember the beauty of serving one another in marriage, parenting, and life. It's about choosing unity over comfort and choosing sacrifice when love calls for it. In This Episode: A powerful story from a recent family trip that reminded Joe and Shelby of what love really looks like How witnessing quiet, sacrificial love challenged them to reexamine their own marriage Reflections on the unseen struggles couples carry—and how God meets us there Encouragement for anyone navigating hardship, caregiving, or emotional exhaustion 3 Truths to Take with You: Love Gets Uncomfortable: Real love shows up, even when it's inconvenient. Unity is a Superpower: In moments of pressure, your greatest strength is facing it together. God Sees It All: Every hidden act of sacrifice is seen by God—and it builds your legacy. Your Challenge This Week: Pick one small act of sacrificial love and do it joyfully—whether that's helping your spouse with something unasked, staying up late to talk with your teen, or simply choosing patience when you're tired. These small moments build the foundation of a lasting, meaningful legacy. Loved this episode? Share it with a friend who needs encouragement. Subscribe and leave a review to help more couples hear the truth: the best marriages are built in the quiet, unseen, sacrificial moments. For coaching or more marriage encouragement, visit redesignyourmarriage.com.   Connect with us and book a free coaching call: Website: http://redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: Redesign Your Marriage Instagram: @‌redesign_your_marriage Instagram: @_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 The moment that sparked this episode: a father carrying his teenage son 3:00 How marriage vows become real in the unseen, sacrificial moments 5:30 Reflecting on their own tragedies and how they've responded in unity—and in conflict 10:00 The power of small, unseen sacrifices in family life 15:00 How pride, burnout, and lack of rest can keep couples disconnected 18:00 A challenge to love sacrificially this week  

Ever had one of those days where everything goes wrong before the vacation even starts? In this real, raw, and (now) hilarious episode of Redesign Your Marriage, we're sharing the unexpected emotions, high tension, and spiritual growth that came from a recent trip that didn't go as planned. After missing a flight to Cabo due to a series of delays (and misjudgments), Joe and Shelby found themselves tested—emotionally, spiritually, and relationally. Instead of turning on each other, they learned to turn with each other. This episode is about how to handle the moments where life doesn't follow your plan… and your relationship is on the line. Whether you've had travel delays, emotional blowups, or unexpected setbacks, this episode will speak to you right where you are. In This Episode: The real story behind missing their flight to Cabo—and what they learned in the process Why practicing what you preach (literally) matters during moments of tension How to process emotion without camping out in blame, guilt, or regret Practical encouragement for responding to life's delays with grace and unity 3 Keys for Facing Delays Without Letting Them Derail You: Don't Turn on Each Other—Turn with Each Other: Tension is inevitable. Unity is a choice. Process the Emotion, But Don't Camp There: Feel it. Talk about it. Then move forward together. Look for the Breakthrough Behind the Breakdown: Delays often come right before something powerful—and worth the wait. Have a delay story of your own? Head over to the Redesign Your Marriage Facebook group and share it—we'd love to hear it! And if you're facing a season of miscommunication or emotional roadblocks, consider booking a coaching session at RedesignYourMarriage.com. If this episode encouraged you, please share it with a friend, subscribe, rate the show, and leave a review. Your support helps other couples find hope when life (and flights) don't go as planned. LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 Missed flight setup: what really happened on the way to Cabo 4:00 Leading a men's devotional while internally wrestling with frustration 8:00 Tears, tension, and a $250 overweight luggage fee 11:30 The turning point: choosing grace over blame 14:00 Delays continue… including forgotten bags and malfunctioning passport scans 23:00 The breakthrough behind the delay 26:00 Final reflections: choosing unity and humor when life doesn't go as planned

As 2024 comes to a close, we're taking a moment to reflect on what worked well for us this year. In this episode of Redesign Your Marriage, we dive into the practical changes and intentional actions that strengthened our marriage, family, and personal lives. From weekly check-ins to creating memorable moments with our kids, we share the wins and lessons that shaped this year. If you're looking for inspiration to kick off your 2025 with purpose, this episode is packed with ideas you can apply in your own life, marriage, and family. In This Episode: Vision Retreats: How taking time as a family to set goals for the year helped us build unity and stay aligned. One-on-One Getaways: Why carving out individual time with our kids created lifelong memories and deepened our relationships. Weekly Check-Ins: Our simple framework for discussing health, wealth, and relationships as a couple and as a family. Expanding Our Circle: The benefits of double dates with other couples and learning from those in different seasons of life. Personal Growth Highlights: Shelby's journey to slowing down and resting, Joe's decision to remove social media from his phone, and how these changes impacted our connection as a couple. As you step into 2025, remember that God's promises are faithful. Even when growth feels slow or progress seems delayed, trust that He's working on the inside to bring transformation to the outside. Reflect on what worked well for you this past year, and don't be afraid to leave behind what didn't. If this episode encouraged you, share it with a friend or loved one who might benefit. Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast! For more resources or to learn about our coaching services, visit redesignyourmarriage.com.   LINKS: Website: http://redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: Redesign Your Marriage Instagram: @‌redesign_your_marriage Instagram: @_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  0:00 Reflecting on 2024: Opposition, growth, and God's faithfulness 5:00 The power of a family vision retreat 10:00 Weekly check-ins: The key to small, consistent wins 12:30 Investing in new friendships and expanding your circle 14:00 Traveling together: Why a change of scenery can change your perspective 17:00 Shelby's rest journey and Joe's social media detox

In this episode, we explore the powerful impact of investing in your children's education and the legacy you're building through intentional parenting. We'll unpack: Guiding your child's path with wisdom: How to train up a child in the way they should go, focusing on their unique purpose (Proverbs 22:6). Balancing discipline and encouragement: The biblical approach to raising children without frustration but with love and instruction (Ephesians 6:4). The marriage connection: How a strong and unified marriage provides a solid foundation for your child's academic, emotional, and spiritual growth. Creating a lasting legacy: Practical steps to leave a legacy of faith, wisdom, and love that impacts future generations. With relatable stories, practical advice, and biblical wisdom, we'll dive into what it means to invest in your child's future holistically. Whether your kids are toddlers or teens, this episode will inspire you to embrace your greatest investment with purpose and intention. Hit play and join us as we explore the heart of parenting and the long-lasting impact of a love-filled legacy. For more episodes and resources to help you raise children with purpose, visit us at redesignyourmarriage.com and join hundreds of other parents who are committed to leaving a legacy of love and faith.   Connect with us and book a free coaching call: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  Welcome back! Let's talk about school - one of our FAQ!  What should you when it comes to your kids school?  Joe and Shelby's experience with school and the ROI mindset  Why it's critical to make your decisions of God's will, not money.  The personal reasons why Joe and Shelby decided not to homeschool  How alternative school options set our kids up for success  God will lead you and will guide your kids success every step of the way

In this episode, we dive deep into the heart of marital communication by exploring the key pillars of physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. We'll unpack: How to align and support each other's physical health aspirations. The essential needs that fuel emotional fulfillment in your relationship. Ways to nurture and grow together spiritually, fostering a deeper bond. With expert advice, relatable stories, and practical tips, "Redesign Your Marriage" guides you on a journey to meaningful conversations that enhance love, trust, and understanding. Whether you're newlyweds or seasoned partners, this episode will inspire you to ask the right questions, listen with intention, and build a stronger, more intimate connection with your spouse. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of. ​Connect with us: Facebook: Redesign Your Marriage http://Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage http://instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary Welcome back!: Discussing the importance of effective communication in marriage. Holistic Approach: Addressing physical, emotional, and spiritual needs in communication. Communication Challenges: Recognizing how attempts to connect can sometimes lead to conflict. Asking Better Questions: The need for meaningful questions to understand each other better. Deeper Conversations: Suggested questions for physical, emotional, and spiritual connection. Entryway Concept: Using the first 30 minutes after time apart to reconnect. Listening Without Judgment: Emphasizing the importance of listening without trying to solve problems. Avoiding Distractions: Removing distractions like phones during communication. Key Questions: Tips for discussing physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Practical Tips: Practice communication skills until they become a habit. Conclusion: Encouragement to apply the tools, share the podcast, and explore coaching services.  

In this insightful episode of "Redesign Your Marriage," we dive deep into the vital role friendships play in a thriving marriage. We explore a unique perspective on categorizing relationships as leaf, branch, and root connections, each serving a distinct purpose in our lives.We discuss how leaf people represent casual acquaintances, branch people are those we've shared experiences with, and root people form our deepest friendships, all grounded in shared values and integrity centered on Christ. Our conversation highlights the importance of understanding these different levels of connection and how they impact marital harmony.Key topics include: The leaf-branch-root friendship model and its application in marriage Balancing different types of friendships while prioritizing your spouse Strengthening your marital bond through shared friendships Communication strategies for discussing friendships with your partner Maintaining unity in your marriage while nurturing outside relationships Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, this episode offers valuable insights on cultivating a friendship-rich marriage without compromising your primary relationship. Tune in to learn how to branch out wisely and root your marriage in strong, Christ-centered connections. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us in our Facebook community at Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of. ​Connect with us: Facebook: Redesign Your Marriage http://Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage Instagram (@_shelby_seeley) Episode Minute By Minute:  Welcome to Redesign Your Marriage Podcast Introduction and continuation of the friendship topic. Importance of Seasonal Friendships Discussing the concept of seasonal friends and how they differ from lifelong friends. Personal Experiences with Friendships Sharing personal stories about high school friendships and social connections. Testing of Friendships through Adversity How true friendships are tested and proven through difficult times. The Lord's Example of Friendship Biblical perspective on friendships and how pressure reveals true relationships. Leaf People Explanation of seasonal friends as leaf people and their role in our lives. Branch People Description of casual friends as branch people and how to manage expectations with them. Trunk and Root People Discussion on lifelong friends and the stability they provide. Pruning Friendships When and how to reassess and possibly let go of certain friendships. Unity and Communication in Relationships Importance of communication and unity in maintaining strong relationships. Encouraging Friends Encouragement to appreciate and communicate with friends at all levels.  

In this episode of "Redesign Your Marriage," we delve into the transformative power of friendship within marriage and how it serves as a cornerstone for a thriving relationship. Join us as we explore three insightful tips to help you identify the stage of friendship you are in with your spouse, and learn how to foster healthy friendships that enhance your marital bond. We'll also discuss the warning signs of unhealthy friendships that can undermine your relationship. Finally, we reflect on the profound truth that God is our ultimate best friend, guiding us in building stronger, more fulfilling marriages. Tune in for practical advice, heartfelt stories, and greater insights to enrich your journey together.   Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage.   For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us at http://redesignyourmarriage.com/ and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:    The Importance of Friendships in Marriage Personal Stories of Friendship Friendship as a Foundation in Marriage Challenges and Efforts in Maintaining Friendships Intentionality in Building Friendships The Benefits of Friendships Defining and Modeling Friendships Phases of Friendship The Need for Friendship Final Thoughts and Call to Action  

Welcome to Redesign Your Marriage, in this episode, we delve into actionable strategies to enhance empathy within marriage, drawing from timeless biblical principles and modern psychological insights. From active listening techniques to cultivating compassion and validation of emotions, "Empathy in Action" provides couples with the tools and guidance they need to navigate the complexities of married life with grace and understanding. Join us as we embark on a journey of growth and transformation, learning to walk in each other's shoes and embrace the beauty of empathy in our relationships. Whether you're facing challenges or seeking to strengthen the bonds of love, "Empathy in Action" offers practical advice and encouragement to help you nurture a more empathetic and supportive marriage. Subscribe now and join our community of couples committed to putting empathy into action in their marriages. Together, let's create a world where understanding, compassion, and love reign supreme in every aspect of our lives. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us on our Facebook community and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:  The Power of Words in Marriage Introducing Empathy: The Game-Changer Empathy Beyond the Surface Empathy's Role in Overcoming Challenges Practical Tips for Cultivating Empathy Closing Thoughts and Encouragement  

Welcome to Redesign Your Marriage, where we dive deep into the intricacies of relationships and marriage. In this episode, we dive into the profound importance of authenticity and transparency in the sacred bond of marriage. Join us as we explore the transformative power of removing masks and embracing the flaws and imperfections that make each partnership unique. Joe and Shelby passionately emphasize the creation of a safe haven within marriages, where both partners can courageously unveil their vulnerabilities without the looming fear of judgment or criticism. Drawing from their own experiences, Joe and Shelby shed light on the discomfort that often accompanies the journey towards greater transparency, emphasizing the necessity of self-awareness and a willingness to step outside one's comfort zone. They interweave the element of prayer into the fabric of a healthy relationship, revealing a compelling statistic that underscores the positive impact of regular prayer on marital success. The episode unfolds with a powerful reminder of the significance of active listening when our significant other opens up, solidifying the foundation of trust and understanding. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:    The Role of Makeup in Society Parenting and Makeup: A Personal Perspective The Pressure of Perfection: Makeup as a Metaphor The Impact of Peer Pressure and Criticism Unmasking the Hidden Truth: The Need for Authenticity Creating a Safe Space in Relationships The Importance of Transparency in Marriage The Power of Prayer in Strengthening Marriages Celebrating Each Other: The Key to a Healthy Marriage Conclusion: The Journey Towards Authenticity and Intimacy  

On this podcast of Redesign Your Marriage, we explore the transformative journey of letting go, holding life with open hands, and navigating the various seasons of marriage and motherhood. In this episode, we delve into the art of releasing expectations, embracing change, and redesigning our relationships to thrive in every season. From the challenge of becoming empty nesters to the diverse experiences of motherhood, we share our stories, insights, and practical tips. Join us in this episode as we navigate the twists and turns of married life and embracing the beautiful ebb and flow of life's seasons. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of. LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:  The Importance of Letting Go Personal Experiences with Letting Go The Pain of Holding On The Challenge of Letting Go of Loved Ones The Transition to Becoming Empty Nesters The Struggle of Letting Go of Roles The Power of Trusting God in Letting Go The Impact of Letting Go on Relationships The Role of Emotions in Letting Go Conclusion: The Beauty of Letting Go  

In this episode on Redesign Your Marriage, we dive into the transformative concept that Focus is Power. In this dynamic podcast, we explore the profound impact of maintaining focus on our marriage, faith, and personal growth. We believe that the strength of our connection lies in our ability to remain focused on our shared goals and Christ-centered values. Together, we share insights, personal stories, and practical tips to help couples harness the incredible power that comes from unwavering focus. If you believe that staying on course is key to unlocking your fullest potential as a couple, this episode is your guide to navigating the journey of marriage with intention, purpose, and the strength that focus provides. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:    The Importance of Focus in the New Year The Power of Setting Goals as a Family Celebrating Achievements and Progress Overcoming Distractions and Staying Focused The Role of God in Setting Goals The Importance of Action in Achieving Goals The Power of Vision in Achieving Goals The Importance of Prioritizing Goals Impacting Others Through Your Goals Modeling Goal Setting for Your Children Encouragement for 2024!  

Welcome to Redesign Your Marriage podcast! In this episode we are discussing Parenting in the Digital Age,' where we navigate the intricate landscape of raising children amidst the challenges of technology. In this podcast, we intertwine biblical wisdom with practical insights to guide parents in instilling strong values, modeling healthy digital habits, and using technology as a powerful teaching tool. Drawing inspiration from Proverbs 22:6, Matthew 5:16, and Deuteronomy 6:6-7, we emphasize the importance of establishing clear values, being a shining example, and actively engaging in meaningful conversations with our children. Join us for enriching discussions, expert interviews, and real-life stories, as we empower parents to embrace the digital age with faith, intentionality, and a steadfast commitment to nurturing the hearts of the next generation. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of. LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:    Parenting in the Digital Age: A Personal Story The Evolution of Technology and Its Impact The Importance of Setting Boundaries with Technology The Role of Technology in Parenting The Dangers of Unregulated Technology Use The Importance of Understanding and Monitoring Digital Platforms The Role of Technology in Family Values and Boundaries The Impact of Technology on Relationships and Communication The Role of Technology in Faith and Morality The Importance of Modeling Healthy Digital Habits Using Technology as a Tool for Growth and Connection The Importance of Real Relationships Outside the Digital World The Importance of Careful Digital Communication  

Welcome to this episode where we cover the importance of self care in your marriage. In this episode we will embark on a journey of self-care intertwined with spiritual growth. Tune in for biblical wisdom, heartfelt discussions, and uplifting stories that guide you and your spouse toward a sacred dance of self-love, mutual care, and a closer walk with God in your marriage. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:    00:11 Introduction and Welcome 00:27 Understanding Self Care in Relationships 01:27 The Misconception of Self Care as Selfishness 02:10 The Importance of Self Care in Marriage 04:07 The Biblical Perspective on Self Care 06:26 The Role of Sabbath in Self Care 15:29 The Importance of Individual Time with God 20:04 Creating a Self Care Plan Together 26:54 Conclusion and Final Thoughts  

In our Redesign Your Marriage podcast we want to cover topics that no one else is talking about and in this episode we are tackling mental health and your marriage. We know that mental health issues can significantly impact the dynamics of a marriage and the quality of the marital relationship can influence an individual's mental well-being. In this episode we discuss three tips to manage the interplay between marriage and mental health. Recognize and Educate Open Communication and Support Prioritize Self-Care and Boundaries Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:    Dive into today's episode, all about tackling mental health and your marriage!  If you are in need of mental health support, go and seek professional help today!  Mental health can also stem from spiritual attacks  Marriage does not fix everything, it actually highlights weaknesses and struggles  Find time and space in your marriage to openly talk about what you are feeling  Learn how to become quick to listen and slow to speak  Practical daily tips to approaching your mental health  Laughter and enjoying each others company is so vital to our mental health Learning how to know each others boundaries  Pay coast attention to what you are filling your mind with daily  The importance of protecting your marriage's mental health!   

In this episode we discuss how to deal with external stresses as we know it can put strain on your marriage. We discuss the the effects it has on marriage and some effective strategies.  Couples can navigate these challenges together and emerge even stronger.   The three tips to manage external stresses that we discuss are:  Open and Honest Communication: Teamwork and Joint Problem-Solving Seek External Support   Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   Connect with us: Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley   Quick Episode Summary:  Jump into today's episode, all about navigating external stresses in life and your marriage  Stress is one of the number one killers and is connected to major medical issues  Learning to walk in unity together in your marriage  Have you ever had a day where external stresses pile up and you begin to argue? We have to be able to communicate and to be able to be heard  We give you 3 practical tips on how to deal with external stress in your marriage!  Learning to work together well to minimize stress  Lean on professional support and close friends to help process, educate and pray  Taking on pressure together, through faith, builds perseverance and you mature as a couple  

​Welcome back to the Redesign Your Marriage podcast. Have you ever experienced some of these most common causes of power struggles in your marriages include disagreements over finances, household chores, parenting styles, and intimacy. In this podcast we will talk about all those power struggles and more. We unveil the truth behind how you can achieve a power union, instead of the constant battle of a power struggle. With biblical truths and practical tips you can finally put the struggle ​& conflict behind you and​ tap into the superpower in your marriage. Hit play and join us as we unpack this hot topic and discover the true secret to a lasting marriage. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of. LINKS:   Website: redesignyourmarriage.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/redesignyourmarriage Instagram.com/redesign_your_marriage instagram.com/_shelby_seeley Quick Episode Summary:    Hey there! Ready to take some steps of faith? A look into our challenge! Want a better relationship? Start here! How God can create the marriage of your dreams  Marriage ain't easy, but with God in the mix, it's a game-changer. Why and how investing time into relationships always pays off Community is key. Couples are not meant to do life solo! Fun fact: How we met as teenagers and our origin story  Marriage has its phases! Get a glimpse into our highschool love How to join our community group of like-minded couples Real talk: Marriage is more than just the wedding day. It's a lifelong journey! What a house remodel can teach you about marriage Did you dream of your wedding more than your actual marriage?  Our first year of marriage was... let's just say, a learning curve! Here is what we learned. One of our first fights: Priorities, priorities! Basketball over dinner? Marriage is a commitment. Let's make it count together!  And so much more!!!  

Are you tired of having the same conversation with your spouse when it comes to money in your marriage? Do you try to avoid the conversation all together? Then you will want to listen to this podcast. We provide 3 practical tips on how to finally get on the same page when it comes to your money. Stop living paycheck to paycheck and start pursuing all God has for your marriage and money. Start pursuing freedom in your finances. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us Redesign Your Marriage and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS: ● www.redesignyourmarriage.com   Quick Episode Summary:    3 tips on how to pursue freedom in finances!  Finances are the #2 reason why people get a divorce  Everything starts with your mindset about money  Biggest common mistake for marriages is having separate bank accounts Every decision in marriage should be made in unity  One sided financial decisions can create resentment within a marriage  Learning how to shift your mindset to being a steward of God's money  Sit down and create a budget for your finances and take control of where it all goes  If you can manage one dollar well, you can manage a million well  Learn how to build a model that takes you from building wealth, to building legacy!    

In the podcast episode we uncover the reason why you may have hurt and offense in your marriage that you just can't seem to get past. We dive deep into the discussion of why staying in integrity with your spouse is a must at all times. We also uncover the reason we make excuses in our marriage everyday to keep living the same way and doing the same thing and calling it a good marriage when in fact it may be being destroyed from the inside out. For additional episodes and more content to help you have a thriving marriage visit us redesignyourmarriage.com and join the hundreds of other couples wanting to redesign their marriage and finally they have the marriage they have always dreamed of.   LINKS: ● www.redesignyourmarriage.com   Quick Episode Summary:  The truth about putting tasks off for "tomorrow" in marriage and the long-term effects it could have The importance of personal integrity in marriage Lack of integrity erodes trust and can lead to conflict in a marriage Communication: The key aspect of gaining trust with your spouse and staying on top of all your "tasks" together How working together builds trust and unity in a marriage How personal integrity can impact everyone in the family in a positive way Why every couple should avoid manipulation and control in a marriage How you can start applying these tips today!

Welcome to the Redesign Your Marriage Family, this is part two of the podcast we are doing on the changing seasons of life. In this episode we discuss a place we have all found ourselves that messy middle. We provide some tools that help you get unstuck and move from that messy middle to the miracle on the other side of hard. LINKS: ● www.redesignyourmarriage.com   Quick Episode Summary:  The season of the messy middle Messy seasons are like hallways  God wants to turn your mess into your message  God does not want you to stay in the middle, He wants to show you His plan  Obedience and sacrifice are key  Do not be in a hurry to skip steps, God works one step at a time

Welcome to the Redesign Your Marriage family. Today we are breaking down some ways we have discovered and relied on when experiencing some of the craziest, hardest seasons in our life and our marriage.   LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Handling the changing seasons We are officially almost empty nesters  Every season can come with mixed emotions Learning how to change throughout relationships Change is the only thing that you can guarantee God has a plan to bless you 

In this episode, we take a deep dive into your office, which is where you spend your time and money. This is the most requested teaching we get because couples want to get it right and it seems to always be changing. We provide you practical tools and tips on how to finally get a shared vision with your time and money. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary:  Why we take money seriously in our marriage One way the polity mindset shows up  How Joe and Shelby budgeted over the years The importance of shared vision in finances When we went into over $1M+ in debt The statistics behind divorce and money issues     

If your marriage is falling apart look at the foundation. Are you living on a cracked or faulty foundation, can it be repaired or is it too late? In this episode you will learn to identify the cracks in your marriage and how you can build or rebuild your marriage on a solid foundation that will one day will outlast you. Quick Episode Summary: What happens if we don't have a good foundation  The story behind when Joe broke his foot  Prophetic words from God in the hospital  Sometimes it takes time to heal  It's going to take work but it's worth it!  You are not broken, because of Jesus!  The dream marriage

Do you know what the #1 silent killer in marriage is? It's un-forgiveness, you not forgiving the offenses against your spouse, not forgiving those in your past and especially not forgiving yourself. This will kill your marriage from the inside out. Don't go another day living like this and we want to help you get free and finally live the marriage of your dreams. Quick Episode Summary:  God has designed your marriage intentionally  The main reason you need to find forgiveness for your suppose  Forgiveness is a process sometimes  Get out of the un-forgiveness loop Only the Lord can heal your heart  Your feelings are not your identity  Why the blame game shouldn't happen in your marriage 

When you have 2 visions, you have division. Are you and your spouse on the same page going in the same direction? This episode will reveal to you if you really do have the same vision in life or if you need to take the steps needed to finally have a shared vision. Don't waste another day or a lifetime living in division instead get shared vision. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: A look into our origins story pre-marriage  Why had a cracked foundation been we got married  What is your marriage origin story? Your marriage can always get better! (Even if it's great) Marriage is God's original idea (See Gen. 1) God has a plan for you and your marriage The importance of unity and a shared vision The three parts to growth in your marriage You are unstoppable when you work together What a genius chapter three marriage looks like 

Have you ever felt like two ships just passing in the distance, or like you are living with a roommate and not your spouse? In this episode we are going to take a deep dive into why you feel that way and what you can do in order to get a shared purpose and vision. Stop living a life where you feel single, but you're married. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Let's talk about the living room Stopping to catch up on life The original intent for marriage and living rooms Fighting to protect the living room Keep the focus on serving Home versus a house 

Everything may look great on the outside but once you take an honest look at your marriage you realize that it is complete chaos and you have just learned to function in it. If you are sick and tired of living in utter chaos in your marriage this episode will expose what chaos looks like and what to do with it. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Give each other credit for small wins/projects What the entryway says about you When things feel out of place Some issues don't go away Get organized and get direction Don't hand the chaos back and forth  Setting the tone properly  A lesson Joe's grandpa bought him

What do people see when they see you and your spouse do they see something that is magical or a hot mess of a relationship. Either one you can always get better and improve what you have with just a few easy tricks and we will show you how you can start applying them to your marriage today. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Episode 3 recap Let's talk about curb appeal How you're feeling externally about your spouse Is your body your own? Considering how your spouse sees you Curb appeal: The cheapest and most valuable thing you can do Your action steps for today 

Do you throw out your marriage and start over or do you get a new vision and a new design for your marriage? Don't let all the time, energy and effort you have put into your marriage go to waste. You can choose today to redesign and have the marriage you always thought possible and we will show you how. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Let's talk about the "redesign" phase of marriage We want to help you not miss the little pieces The three-phase principles of marriage Optimizing the details of your marriage Taking what you have and making it better Is it time to tear down the walls? Your marriage is worth the investment You are going to need help, don't go it alone! Action steps for this episode How to connect for with Joe and Shelbey further

What happens after the happily ever after? What happens after the dream wedding? The Hollywood movies we've all grown up on give us the wrong expectations. We are giving you all the action steps you need on how to succeed in your marriage after the honeymoon stage. Let's get you to the next level of your marriage. LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary: Does happily ever after really happen? Why Joe and Shelby were excited to get married A look into Joe and Shelby's first fight It all can get better! God commands a blessing on unity The importance of having a vision  Your action steps for today! Joe and Shelby's current goals

Welcome to our very first episode. We are committed to diving headfirst into all things marriage. Where the church has shied away from the tough conversations, we are ready to talk about them, yes even SEX. We know that whether you need to redesign, remodel, or a complete overhaul with God we can help you recreate the marriage of your dreams!! LINKS:  www.redesignyourmarriage.com Quick Episode Summary:  Welcome to the show!  Get to know Joe and Shelby  The secret to a long marriage Giving yourself permission to change Everything is a work in progress We the "never quit attitude" is so important The complexities of intimacy  Let's build your dream marriage Joe and Shelby's heart for every listener Your action step for this week