Sabbatical or Suicide

PODCAST · society

Sabbatical or Suicide

Rounding 40 is tough for any woman. Add Lesbian, addiction, depression, a failing marriage and a sudden suicide to the equation...then listen as she takes the last bit of money she has and hops on an airplane to Europe with only 1 bag, two microphones and Zero Plan, you have this podcast. Welcome to Sabbatical or Suicide. Choose Sabbatical, ya'll. Get drunk. Have Sex, a lot of it. Then, Choose Life. Choose Yourself. You're worth it. *MAKE SURE YOU HAVE HEADPHONES ON WHEN LISTENING TO THIS, ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE AROUND YOUR MOM OR IN PUBLIC.

  1. 6

    When Life or Death Only Goes ONE-WAY TICKET TO PARIS (Ep 5)

    What if your first impression of a dream… disappoints you?In One-Way Ticket to Paris, Kathleen follows the coin toss into the iconic city of love—but instead of romance, she finds distance, disconnection, and an unexpected loneliness. As she reflects on childhood rejection and the reality of starting over, Paris becomes a mirror for the emotional uncertainty she’s still navigating.But this episode isn’t just about disappointment—it’s about perspective.Through a powerful conversation with Andrea, a high-achieving corporate attorney who walked away from a “perfect” life, Kathleen explores a deeper truth: sometimes nothing has to go wrong for everything to feel wrong. And sometimes, it’s the awareness of life’s fragility that finally gives us permission to live.From quiet heartbreak to bold, life-altering decisions, this episode asks a provocative question:What would you do differently if you knew your time was limited?Because one-way tickets aren’t just about travel—they’re about choosing a new way to live.

  2. 5

    Surrendering Your Fate to a COIN TOSS (Ep 4)

    What happens when you stop overthinking… and start saying yes?In The Coin Toss, Kathleen steps deeper into the unknown—navigating life after a 14-year relationship and confronting the strange, exhilarating world of dating again. What begins as a spontaneous connection in Amsterdam turns into something unexpectedly healing: laughter, intimacy, and a reminder that life—and love—doesn’t end where you thought it did.As she reflects on identity, heartbreak, and the fear of starting over at 37, Kathleen begins to loosen her grip on control. For the first time, she allows herself to follow curiosity instead of fear.And when it’s time to leave Amsterdam, she makes one final surrender:letting chance decide where she goes next.A coin toss.Two cities.One life, finally in motion.This episode is about release—of the past, of expectations, and of the need to have it all figured out.

  3. 4

    Cure to Heartbreak is Amsterdam High (Ep 3)

    In Amsterdam High, Kathleen lands in Amsterdam and discovers the unexpected joy of starting over. From meeting her quirky canine companion Mucha to navigating a surprisingly wonderful all-night date, Kathleen finds herself embracing the freedom and surprises of life after heartbreak.Amid canals, coffee shops, and sunlit adventures, she learns that even after loss, the world is full of surprises—and courage is the key to finding them.

  4. 3

    Drowning in Chicago (Ep 2)

    What does it feel like to fall apart… right before everything begins?In this episode of Sabbatical or Suicide, Kathleen arrives in Chicago searching for a simple escape—a weekend on the lake, a break from reality, a moment to breathe. Instead, she finds herself face-to-face with the full weight of her unraveling life.Fresh off the end of her marriage and still reeling from the loss of her brother, Kathleen is forced to confront a truth she’s spent years hiding behind a carefully constructed image of happiness. For the first time, she can’t fake it.What unfolds is a raw, unfiltered descent—grief, identity, fear, and the crushing question of what comes next. From emotional breakdowns with family to moments of quiet desperation along the shores of Lake Michigan, Kathleen reaches one of the lowest points of her life.And yet… this is also where something shifts.Because in the middle of the chaos, a choice is made:to keep going.This episode captures the fragile space between breaking down and breaking free—the moment where everything feels lost, but the first step forward is already in motion.Kathleen leaves Chicago not with answers, but with a one-way ticket into the unknown.Next stop: Amsterdam.

  5. 2

    Finding Light in the Dark: The Tunnel (Ep 1)

    What if the life you feel trapped in… isn’t actually a life you have to stay in?In this opening episode of Sabbatical or Suicide, Kathleen takes you back to the day everything began to unravel—and ultimately, begin again.Living in quiet depression, stuck in a loveless marriage, and battling thoughts she couldn’t silence, Kathleen wakes up on what feels like just another ordinary day. But within weeks, her world shifts forever after the sudden and devastating loss of her brother, Jim—a loss that forces her to confront questions she can no longer avoid.As grief, identity, and truth collide, Kathleen finds herself at a breaking point:stay the same… or change everything.What follows is the first crack of light in what she calls “the tunnel”—the belief that she is stuck, that she can’t leave, that there are no other options.This episode is about that moment.The moment when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the fear of change.The moment when survival demands honesty.The moment when a new path—however uncertain—begins.Kathleen shares the story not as an expert, but as someone still in it. For anyone who has felt trapped, overwhelmed, or alone in their thoughts—this is for you.Because the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t the illusion.The tunnel is.

  6. 1

    If Not Me, Who? Introduction 00

    Rounding 40 is tough for any woman. Add Lesbian, addiction, depression, a failing marriage and a sudden suicide to the equation...then hop on an airplane to Europe with 1 bag, 2 microphones and 0 Plan and you have this podcast. Welcome to Sabbatical or Suicide. Choose Sabbatical, ya'll. Leave everything you know. Spend all your money. Get drunk. Have Sex, a lot of it. Then, Choose Life. Choose Yourself. You're worth it. *CONTENT WARNING: MAKE SURE YOU HAVE HEADPHONES ON WHEN LISTENING TO THIS, ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE AROUND YOUR MOM OR IN PUBLIC.

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ABOUT THIS SHOW

Rounding 40 is tough for any woman. Add Lesbian, addiction, depression, a failing marriage and a sudden suicide to the equation...then listen as she takes the last bit of money she has and hops on an airplane to Europe with only 1 bag, two microphones and Zero Plan, you have this podcast. Welcome to Sabbatical or Suicide. Choose Sabbatical, ya'll. Get drunk. Have Sex, a lot of it. Then, Choose Life. Choose Yourself. You're worth it. *MAKE SURE YOU HAVE HEADPHONES ON WHEN LISTENING TO THIS, ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE AROUND YOUR MOM OR IN PUBLIC.

HOSTED BY

Coffee With Kam

Produced by Sabbatical or Suicide

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