Shapes and Shadows

Join me for episode 77 of Shapes and Shadows where I do the February dump and dump all over a bunch of movies. It's a mix mash of nonsense and ramblings with a lot of cursing. Lets GO!!!!!

Lets take a look back at the top 10 stand out horror films of 2025. We'll laugh and we'll cry, we can hug each other after the episode. I love you

Join me for the 2025 Halloween edition of Shapes and Shadows. We talk lots of random Halloween horror and what you should be watching during the month of October. Enjoy episode 75 and Happy Halloween!

Just when you thought your relationship couldnt get any worse. You argue with your wife about getting a new coffee table. She disagrees, and you look forward to the birth of your new baby, but you insist on needing this coffee table. Prepare yourselfs for a thrill ride of fun and did that just happen type moments on the next episode of Shapes and Shadows!

The September wrap up of various movie watches for the month leading into spooky season!

Welcome back to the first of many compilation episodes. The first 15 mins are me crying into nothingness about the current state of podcasting. Then I wipe away the tears and quickly give multiple mini reviews for several movies I watched over the month of August. Expect change and new things for Shapes and Shadows. This is episode 72, enjoy!

Take a trip to the land of Italian sleeze, where movies are made with lots of nudity and sex. A place where even the demons want to take you to bed and lay you down. Call the horny police because you'll be in for a surprise with this one. Get a drink and get some lotion, lay back and let the demon wash over you all on episode 71 of Shapes and Shadodws!

Join me for episode 70 as we talk about paying tribute to the films that came before you and just ripping off what you like. Were talking slow burns, with minmal kills and still calling it a slasher. Were talking killers with sacks on their heads and low budget goodness! All this and more on the next episode!

Join me for episode 69 where we talk classic samurai film and where the Mandalorian took the idea of walking around with your baby as you handle business. We'll talk rivers of crimson red, swords clanging, and ridiculous dubs of classic Japanese chanbara films all on the next episode of Shapes and Shadows so bring your sharpest sword and be ready to cut down anyone who dare stands in your way.

We talk the latest batch of movies I watched. We talk 2003 and the cult classic Wrong Turn where we discuss mutant inbred hillbillies and if that word is offensive to some. We talk the back woods of West Virginia and do these mountain men exist? Horror tropes of the typical teen slasher and how the hot chic always survives. Join me on the next episode of Shapes and Shadows.

Welcome back for episode 67, where we'll be talking about Finlands immortal soldier and how you dont pick on the elderly. Were talking about blood and gore, violence and a good time. Its time for Sisu!!

Welcome back for episode 66 of Shapes and Shadows! We'll be talking about fuzzy little space balls that'll poke your eyes out and guys with mutating faces that change on a whim. Small time farm life, and horror movies made for the family. Is it possibly gateway horror and the beautiful special fx of 1986. All this on the next episode of Shapes and Shadows!

Welcome back for episode 65 where we'll be talking about Anya Taylor Joy, The Queens Gambit herself. Martial arts genre classification that doesnt belong. We'll discuss genetically modified humanoid beings, therapy sessions that end with silverware in your face and humanoid beings wanting to experience the beautiful outdoors. What could go wrong when you genetically modify human beings, you'll find out next on Shapes and Shadows!

Welcome back for another episode of Shapes and Shadows where we celebrate Valentine's day and the month of February. We'll talk about killer cherubs, loading a gun properly and all the pretty people who treated the nerdy kids in school bad that deserve to be unalive. We talk giallo vibes, boobies, beavers and the Italian way as well as how the 90s and early 2000s horror was a subgenre all its own on episode 64!

Get your stretchy pants on because were going to rip off one of the greatest horror films of all time by adding in some martial arts action! We'll kick and punch our way through this nonsense of a film and watch Chuck make sweet love to a lady and then kick ass on some genetically altered Micheal Myers clone! Strap in and get ready to do some 80s karate all on episode 63 of Shapes and Shadows!

Episode 62 of Shapes and Shadows, we'll be talking about oopy goopy drippy beings from space. Don't let it melt your face as we talk about conspiracy theories, '80s practical fx, the tough guy who rides a motorcycle, hangs out by himself and the cool cheerleader girl who saves us all from the end of the world! Hit up the show with comments or suggestions - [email protected]

Happy New Year and welcome to episode 61 of Shapes and Shadows! I dont normally do a top 10 of the year, but let's change it up and do something different, right? This is my top 10 horror and sci-fi movies at face value for 2024. These are just my opinions, no rhyme or reason behind it. Just cool movies that I saw during the year that I thought deserved some recognition.

Join me for episode 60 as we talk Lovecraftian cosmic horror with mutants, mayhem and Nic Cage acting like he normally does. We'll look deep into the stars and have you thinking twice before you ever drink well water or touch some random space rock. Its here, its now and it will consume you. Let it burn through your body! @shapes_shadowspod on IG/Threads @shapes_shadows on X

Happy Halloween and welcome to episode 59 where we're talking gore heavy slashers, masks that have chrome, trench knives and partial found footage indie horror. Come dressed to impress on this next episode. Time stamps- Mini movie reviews: 3:45 Main feature review: 18:00

Join me for episode 58 where we talk about mad cows, infected zombies, can humans get mad cow? We'll do our best to not get kuru, so go to your favorite restuarant and order a burger. Lets talk comedy horror, lets cry about the career that Billy Zane has had all on the next spine tingling adventure of Shapes and Shadows!

Join me on episode 57 where we talk cryptozoological creatures of the night, more specifically Bigfoot. We talk found footage horror and all the nonsense that comes with the subgenre. Its rough around the edges but this movie will make you think twice before you film strange creatures in the woods. Bring your friends, steal your uncles keys to the cabin, bring some alcohol, bring the ladies and lets get hairy. Remember keep the camera in focus!

Episode 56 is upon us! We'll take a long Trek after surviving hurricane Milton so we can talk about terrible dialogue, mutant savages, busted nuts and boring indie horror. Grab your face and your weiner so it does'nt get ripped off while listeing to the next episode of Shapes and Shadows!

Its episode 55 of Shapes and Shadows, we'll be talking about World War 1 trench fighting, German soldiers with worms in their faces, mutant tunnelers, and parasites. Are they mutants, are they zombies, are they some weird experiment gone wrong similar to this podcast. Tune in to find out from hurricane city in Tampa, were doing the damn thing!

Welcome back to another episode of Shapes and Shadows! Today were talking 40th anniverasry of one of the greates slashers ever. Its prime mutant Jason Voorhees on a killing rampage. Were finding lost cork screws, not hunting bears, how Ted White is better than "Plain Schmodder" and your love for T&A. We got rants/complaints locked and loaded in this episode. So grab your bathing suit and head on over to the lake to get some fresh air and spot some patootsies, on episode 54!

Welcome back to episode 53 of Shapes and Shadows where we'll be talking about the British Alien invasion. Big gorilla wolf aliens, with beautiful glowing teeth and the loved and hated sub-genre of Kids on Bikes. We'll throw in some social commentary for good measure and laugh at it all because nothing will change until the system crumbles along with these aliens!

Welcome back for episode 52! Grab your passport cause were heading over to Johburg, South Africa. Were gonna talk about Ai, sentient robots, mech design and like this podcast the one and only infamous king and queen of ZEF, Die Antwoord! Take a seat, open up your ear holes and prepare for an emotional roller coaster of hate, love, joy and sadness. Strap in Fvck mothers cause you're heading to the other place!

Join me for episode 51 where we talk about one of the most hated men in cinema. He's made tons of terrible movies, the man you love to hate, Uwe Boll! We're going to talk about this controversial little gem and probably one of Bolls best films, which isnt saying much. We're talking the problems of the world, framing your good friend and not moving out of your parents house all while building a tactical suit of armor to pull off your grand scheme to change the world! Will it work, find out in the episode!

I bring you episode 50 of Shapes and Shadows where we're putting a stop to crime with our cyborg alter egos. Head on into the coed locker room, grab your weapon of choice and suit up cause its my first day and I'm driving! We'll talk metal heroes of Japan versus the metal heroes of America as well as the remakes slender robot ninja aesthetic. We'll talk iconic ultra violence, mech design with ED209 and how you only have 20 seconds to comply, but will shoot you anyways. Mix it all together in a pot with a dash of stop motion and you have one of the greatest satirical action movies ever! You better be listening, you have 20 seconds to comply!

Bring a beach towel and your SPF 60,000,000 because were heading into the sun on episode 49 of Shapes and Shadows. We'll talk wearing cool sunglasses, freezing in deep space, growing plants to create oxygen all while trying to keep our sanity as we drop a nuclear bomb into a dying sun all to save our worthless human lives so we can destroy Earth some more! Stick around and find out how it all plays out for us puny humans or do we just become star dust.

Lets all go to the lobby for episode 48 where we go full Karen and talk about our latest theater experinces and the dos and donts of going to the movies. Then on the tail end of it, i'll throw in some Starship Troopers to talk bugs, violence and all the wondeful things that Paul Verhoeven gave us while I try not to go to jail for fighting in the theater!

Tune into episode 47 where we dive down into the subway systems of London. We'll get drunk, miss our train and look for the ninja turles to only find out that were locked in and there is a mutant Rat King lurking in the shadows waiting to kill us. Make an appointment sit in the chair and maybe you'll get some free healthcare, if youre lucky he'll put your baby in a jar. No one is safe down here so get your ticket and sit tight as we ride the train straight to vermin town!

Lets leap into episode 46 where we talk about people's shoes, mimicing peoples walks with some clacking spoons. Were wearing trench coats down in the subway and hoping to talk to the mole people. If we cant guess your shoes or size we'll just call you funny shoes. We talk cockroaches and why they're not all bad and why once again genetic testing makes for great movie plots and makes the gods angry all on the next episode of the one the only Shapes and Shadows!

Join me for episode 45 where we talk abominations of metal and flesh made by other worldy beings. We're talking biomechanical insectoid creatures fueled by stop motion and practical FX. Its horror sci-fi with Jamie Lee Curtis being angry and why this movie probably never went anywhere. So pull out your eyes and replace them with flashlights whie we try and get to the bottom of what this being from another world wants from us. Its 1999's Virus!

First episode of the new year! Join me for episode 44 where we talk horny aliens that look like knock off xenomorphs! We're talking action horror filled with great practical FX and some not so great 90's CG that'll curl your toes and have you changing your panties in no time! You like it rough, well we got titty tentacles you can wrap around yourself to keep you warm while you laugh then cry yourself to sleep when you find out you're not the suitable mate you thought you were. DNA splicing scientists who care more about extraterrestrial life over humans! Join in for the fun and lets make some babies!

Join me for a special holiday episode where we talk about the other color of Christmas horror that divided audiences and made people on social media cry when it was released. Some people love it, some hate it. Reach down in your heart where the gift of episode 43 keeps on giving. Subject matter may be controversial and by the end you'll hate this movie or hate me. Either way, get ready to empty out the trash on this holiday extravaganza of the macabe!

Welcome back for episode 42 of Shapes and Shadows where we're going to talk about 2019's Yummy! A Shudder exclusive that features, boobs, zombies, breast reductions and lots of intestines! Practical gore galore, with gut munching madness in this fun little bloody zombie flick. Watch it with me or don't, cry or yell at me and let's enjoy the zombs!

Welcome to the forest of ressurection, the 444th portal to the underworld. Continuing on the zombie series, join me as we go pick up some escaped convicts, dodge bullets, stop some undead samurai and yakuza. Make sure to bring your best matrix costumes so we can shoot the forest up and then hack our way through zombies into the distopian future with our trusty katanaas. Episode 41 is a wild ride so grab a drink and listen to me rant and rave about Versus!!

Lets travel to West Africa to take long walks in the desert, shoot zombies in the face, push them to the side when they get in the way and share their clothes. Then we can grab our passport as we head over to India as we do the same thing again, but with a friend. Put your sandles on because its hot and you dont want sand in your socks. We're gonna hang out with zombies and do a whole lot of of walking on episode 40 of Shapes and Shadows

Join me for episode 39 as we travel to Norway to finalize our talk on Na*i zombie explotation films. We're talking zombie gold, having sex while taking a dump. We're talking green screens, practical FX, world war II. Get ready for dismemberment, decapitation and disembolwment all on the next episode of Shapes and Shadows. So grab your tent and warm clothes as we head up into the moutains to drink and party while trying not to disturb the dead.

Fresh off the heels of the last episode, welcome back for our somewhat continuing series of Der Toten Kor! Join me as we mispronounce director's names, talk low budget zombie films, the horrors of war and nudity for days. We talk naziexploitation with little to no practical FX or makeup for that matter. Bring your goggles and your bikini as we get down and dirty all on episode 38 of Shapes and Shadows. Time Stamp: 43:30 is the start for the recap for Shockwaves

On the next episode of Shapes and Shadows, we'll talk world war II, experiments gone wrong, jumping out of planes to your possible death behind enemy lines. Hoping you speak the correct language when you drop down into the forest of fire below. Make sure you don't bring a camera to a gun fight and watch where you step as you make your way through a mine field. Mutants, zombies and the horrors of war all in episode 37. So, get some popcorn and inject this strange syrum into your veins and lets see what happens next!

On the next episode of Shapes and Shadows, we'll talk about surviving for more than 3 days without food and water, being a nerd and what is your purpose here. You'll want to brush up on your social skills, and your tolerance for terrible 90's CG. Here you better know how to do some algebra nd you better be good with coordinates on a map. Who put us here, what conspiracy theory fits best in this scenario and how do we get out of this Cube. Put your glasses on, sit back and start calculating your way through the maze of traps!

On a special episode of Shapes and Shadows, we'll talk about gene splicing, your soon to be mutant daughter and the impure thoughts that you may have towards her. Playing scrabble and choosing your words wisely as not to offend anyone. The legalities of euthanasia, incest, meatwads imprinting as well as animals that change their gender to reach their relationship goals. Follow me on IG @shapes_shadowspod and you can follow me on twitter @shapes_shadows On letterboxd at Armoredfoe

Bring an extra pair of underwear for this next episode of Shapes and Shadows as we pee in the ocean and dive down into the deepest depths of the ocean. We talk about the Mariana trench, imploding versus exploding, my love and your hate for Kristen Stewart and the Twilight series. We're walking around in big armored suits at the bottom of the ocean trying not to die and getting our face face sucked on by creatures with bioluminescent eyes and possible Lovecraftian lineage. Take a deep breath and hold on tight while we sing the sponge bob theme song maties!

Join me for episode 33 of Shapes and Shadows where we talk about the mislabeling of snakes, how beautiful the swamp actually is, splicing animal and plant DNA so we can stop world hunger. Were talking man in a rubber suit shenanigans and Adrienne Barbeau's jugs. What happens to plants when they touch sunlight and where Swampy got his start. It all begins here on the greatest podcast in the world that you never asked for. I love you.

Join me on episode 32 of Shapes and Shadows where i rant and rave about the greys, weird disturbances in the Earth's electromagentic field, why you keep scratching behind your ear and your random nose bleeds are probably because you've been visited. Remember all your base are belong to us! Leave a comment, tell me you love it, tell me you hate it!

Join me for episode 31, where I talk about clowns, clown folklore, dispatching kids, ending the dog, how to take off your red nose when it's time to bang your wife and how not to slice your wrist if you need to undress yourself.

Join me for another episode of Shapes and Shadows where we talk about aliens that aren't welcome, politics that shouldn't be talked about, wanna be The Office mocumentaries to the Halo movie that never came to be and the magical black goo that Christopher Johnson needs to save his people and reverse your altered DNA.

Join me for episode 29 of Shapes and Shadows where I discuss Ninja III-The Domination. I rant incoherently about ninjas, nonsense, aerobics, smoke bombs, small tits and my love for them and all kinds of Asian stereotypes that the 80s seemed to love.

Join me for another episode as we talk about 2013's Under the Skin. An interesting and divisive movie to a lot of people. Its arthouse film making at its best. We get weird visuals, little dialogue and me talking a bunch of nonsense about such a film. Its A24, so bring your brain to the party and be prepared to think!