THE DIRTY KONG PODCAST

Hello there kids, Nelsons still alive and kicking and a guest on the dkp?! thank the Christ! and we also jive about haters hating haters, also coming in on this show we discuss hamster man(?), also we hear the tale of neighbors biting other neighbors cock off, ouchie! THIS JUST IN! JON-BOY AND J TRAIN EAT THE FAMOUS GHOST PEPPERS - Holy Bollock! listen through the after song for a good laugh at these two divs choking of these firery bad-boys! Quote of the show: "doesn't get more black than nelson Mandela! email: [email protected] Facebook/twitter: dirty kong podcast Skype message: jonodirtykong

Hells yes the big 70 SHOW!!! Its party time we get wrecked on GnT (is that gay?), the J-Train has a new and very annoying app, joy! we also ask the question is there social pressure in drinking for men?! We all love fat chicks?! We also discuss all thing D&D yes the boardgame and jon'boy's RUSH gig experiences! What else?! Well… J decides to celebrate this special episode by singing the entire Canadian national anthem, hurray! Quote of the show: "Bieburs shit it, aint he?!" "brotolomol! raising a baby? bager set!" email us on: [email protected] Facebook us! Twitter/ Skype: jonodirtykong

Hay there listeners its... Splurge, yes that's right our retarded friend is back joining Jon-Boy and J for another fun time in studio 2! This week, stir crazy wankin nakedness (crazy!) …sexy window cleaners (oooh lala), David Beckham (fag) and peacock sex Phil! yes people its gonna be a large one! Also Splurge talks kids and trampolines, nasty! Favorite Quote of the Week: " …Tabby's...Indians!..." Facebook/ Twitter: dirtykong podcast. Email us on: [email protected] SKYPE: jonodirtykong

hello there people! A very short episode this week, as we're off to see a scary film and couldn't be bothered to put in some early hours in the studio because we don't care and you guys should be goddamned grateful for whatever we give you! Mwah! We talk about fat people, fatting their way around as they fat...also we discuss eels going places they wish they hadn't and finally warlocks that rape and then kill your best friend! Joy! join us on Twitter: jonodirtykong Facebook: the dirty kong podcast Email: [email protected]

Hay there folks welcome to another fine episode of the DKP, with your hosts, J-Train and Jon-Boy! email us on [email protected] Twitter/Facebook: the dirty kong podcast!

Hay there listeners its episode 66, so J decides to smoke some green and Jon-Boy has to save the day?! We discuss an old favorite this week: penis biting attack, a Vietnamese woman gives birth on a motorbike and even couples raving with their babies, awesome!! and anyone fancy sausage?…don't be a pussy, find out why that's funny in this weeks episode! Favorite Quote of the Week: " …why have i taken a front shit…you've front shat out a baby!..." Facebook/ Twitter: dirtykong podcast. Email us on: [email protected] SKYPE: jonodirtykong

Hay hay kids here we are back again for another round of nonsense, this week: ITS J'S BIRTHDAY! So this week we discuss the 'dirty thong bandit' who looks a lot like Jon-boy?! Judge for yourself on our Facebook page, also this week is our MOTHER'S DAY special episode so we talk about grannies powered by the mains, Every man's dream!? We also discuss an 8 year old kid marrying a 61 year old mother...nice! and finally a great video of a crazy mum buzzing after lady gaga concert, f*cking great. Favorite Quote of the Week: "Californian man busted in toilet with porn, cocaine and small child..." Facebook/ Twitter: dirtykong podcast. Email us on: [email protected] SKYPE: jonodirtykong

Hay listeners this weeks show is dedicated to Richard Briers RIP. We're on top form with a story of friends wanking over a slipknot posters? We also discuss the lowest of the low, that's right…living statues! Bastards! Episode quote of the week: " …he looked like a cunt, dressed as a cunt, standing still like a cunt!" - JonBoy Also this week J rants about asteroids, their coming for us! We talk about men slapping babies on planes and even girls BONKING behind the wheel with disastrous results! Contact us on our Facebook Page and on Twitter! Email us at: [email protected]

Hay there listeners this week we discuss people we try and avoid (most people), our friendly poker match with 'our friend Ben', and also there's a story delivered by the boys at the Royal and Doodall show?! We also discuss horse food…yummy...bagels anyone? Whats your top 'favorite rare things to eat'? Find out J's on this weeks show! Joy! Contact us on our Facebook Page, Twitter and email us at [email protected]!

Hello dear listeners to episode 62 of the DKP! This week we go back to the classic...shit stories! After which we talk road kill, a Muslim's sex education, snow shoveling burglars and even pigeons that poo soap! Contact us on Twitter and Facebook. Email us on: [email protected] Leave us a voice-mail on Skype on: JONODIRTYKONG.

Hello there listeners, this week is another fine addition to the DKP episode listing! We record at Js house this week for a change, JonBoy braves the snow to drive 2 minutes down the round and record some nonsense for you all! We discuss porno addicted chimps, helicopter crashes fiasco, and even a man suffocated by this girlfriends breasts, yummy! Big up to the DHB on their 100th episode extravaganza! As also follow us on Facebook and Twitter. You can Skype in messages on: jonodirtykong Email us on: [email protected]

Hello listeners and Happy new Year welcome to this special LIVE USTREAM episode of the Dirty Kong Podcast! We have our friend Ben calling in, Biglors throws in some comments on the chat-room and Jonboy even decides to strip for the live viewers, bet you wished you'd tuned in now! We discuss lonely old women talking to themselves, a man loses his penis to a rat, and also J discovers a Jesus toaster, joy! More live shows to come keep your eye on our FB page! As always contact us on: email - [email protected] FB page/Twitter - the dirty kong podcast Also voice call on Skype at: jonodirtykong

Welcome to our Christmas special episode 59.B! J's not happy about the present Jon-Boy gets him that he then happens to love?! We discuss Christmas high and lows, monkeys in IKEA, trolls on Facebook and even a popular weather man's addition to gang watch!! Also not to forget our time honored Jesus watch! Merry Christmas and a Happy fucking New Year! Email us on: [email protected] Facebook/Twitter us on: Dirty Kong Podcast Send a skype voice message on: jonodirtykong

Hello everyone from the DKP fan club, this week we discuss tacky Christmas lights and super market sales?! We also delve into a Skype call from Davian Dent from The Bitter Sound Podcast we get ankle deep in anal talk and counting to potato?! We also discuss priests writing sex novels, a man getting the ultimate parking ticket revenge on his ex and even a giant inflatable snowman goes on his jollies. Email us on: [email protected] Facebook/Twitter us on: Dirty Kong Podcast Send a skype voice message on: jonodirtykong

Part 2 of 2 Children in need, donkeys then snow leopards…right?! Australians without swimming pools, how do we punish sexual deviants?…you'll never know with j's drunken ramblings…I'm so sorry listeners… we also hear about elephants speaking human words, men being forced to marry his dead wife's sister and and j train even trys to pronounce some foreign names!? Crazy?! As time goes by we gradually get less and less coherent. it gets worse than usual people... We are so sorry listeners. Our bad… Enjoy. Contact us on: Email: [email protected] Skype messages on: jonodirtykong Facebook/twitter: dirty kong podcast

Part 1 of 2... Welcome listeners to this episode 57 of the Dirty Kong podcast! This week we take a run through of 'a day in the life of' jon-boy, we also discuss children in need, romance, fat people with their roles of fat and fatness, we rail on YouTube adverts, get interrupted by fireworks and steadily get more pissed as the minutes pass in this our two part (drunken) episode! Can you spell on coming train-wreck!? GOOD GOD! Email us on: [email protected] Facebook/Twitter us on: Dirty Kong Podcast Send a Skype voice message on: jonodirtykong

Hay, hay! Here we are we're back from a fairly long hiatus, but now we're as reaualgar as a polo eating 12 year old?! This episode we discuss racists comments, dirty parrot killing mothers, incest and even Jimmy Savile's afterlife lovelife?! Yes we're back on form kids! Voice mail us on SKYPE: jonodirtykong. Or EMAIL: [email protected] and we're even on Facebook!! Joy!

HAY HAY! Welcome to another splendid episode of the DKP, this week we're in JONBOY's living room having a couch sesh…its too hot for studio fun…anyway this week we talk Olympics (almost too much) most especially volley ball…woof! We also discuss Jesus watch again, joy! AND A NEW SEGMENT, stay tuned listeners! We also talk about weird two legged dogs, girlfriends casting boyfriends body parts and even you'll hear JONBOY and the J TRAIN singing repetitively. As always you can contact us via email on: [email protected] Skype voice mail on: jonodirtykong Twitter/ Facebook: dirtykong podcast.

Hay hay another fine episode of the DKP, we talk relationships on this show…oh dear, we hate women, they are evil, brown sauce hating harpies from hell! to find out more download the show. "rub one out" is the extent of J's relationship advice, and SPLURGE is back on the show, joy! Very relaxed episode as the heat is up for summer and we couldn't be arsed to create a coherent show…same old. We also play 'Danger Ball' Revels game! email: [email protected] and/or contact us on Facebook. Twitter: @dirtykongpodcast

Holy crap, here we are again, and you'll never guess…all three hosts are in on this one, this week we talk toilet sex, bear wounds, bleached babies and J-train storms out on the show?! We even have more Gang/Glitter watch and even another Jesus spotting!! give us crap on our Facebook page or send your abuse to: [email protected] also rate our show on iTunes bitches!

Hay there gang we here and we're queer...odd...and silly, this week we look into cat-copters, woman's fat burning down a crematorium, hearing more from the "zombie" cannibal victim and speaking of hearing we look into 'porn for the blind' it sucks! in more ways than one...i need a beer. contact us on [email protected] or join our Facebook page. Also we have a forum! - dirtykong.forumotion.com. Song today is SKINDRED - Pressure.

Here we are kids, episode 51 of the DKP at long last…blame Dave (and his new girlfriend?) and Jon-boy's new job change and IF that isn't bad enough …J now finds women funny?! WTF?!! Things are changing, this week we discuss under age girl's fashion, transgender miss England discovering J is actually gay, also we talk real-life zombies and to finish...WE LOVE INDIANS!!! promise. Jon-boy and J also go into cats. WEBSITE remains under reconstruction, but our new YouTube video is coming out soon! ;) contact us on Facebook or email us at: [email protected]

Hello there ladies and gents!! its here episode 50!! AND we're even filming it available on our YouTube account so check it out, thongs funny hats and beer, a winning combo ;) We talk sex, sex-change granddad, ferret attack and penis quiz, and also tips for selling your virginal juices, so who's thirsty folks? joy! www.dirtykong.co.uk Facebook us! email: [email protected]

Hay there folks this week its another turn with jonboy and J, joy! broken mic again so apologies for the bad audio new tech coming soon for episode 50 though! This week we discuss Whitney's autopsy, weed stealing shock and fatty boom-batty weddings! Drop us a line on Facebook or contact our email on: [email protected] www.dirtykong.co.uk

Welcome to this episode of the DKP (48) all three hosts are in on this one but unfortunately one of our mics broke so there's some crappy audio on the J Train…same old. This week we discuss wheelchair crazy who steals penises, cats being swung around the room, and also the human hedgehog! Contact us on [email protected] www.dirtykong.co.uk

Hay folks this week the one jon-boy, and the one j-train are here to rock your world!! We discuss woman eating the ashes of her husband, a double Jesus-watch feature, COUGAR GIRL chimes in, and thugs/saints bashing in the skulls of swans?! EPISODE 50 LOOM

Hay hay listeners, this week another exciting shoe for ya! Jon-boy and J talk about Nelson Mandela's health scare, NEW UKRAINIAN BABY YOGA, also we talk all about the 'little people' soulless godless creatures, also wheels and sand, that's just not gonna work!? www.dirtykong.co.uk

Welcome to episode 45 of the DKP, this week its Jon-boy and Dave, joy. We discuss the re re re release of STAR WARS episode 1, pigs, culling old people and some good old fashioned car lovin!! GET IN! contact us on our Facebook page and or email us at [email protected] www.dirtykong.co.uk

This is episode 44 of the DKP this week its jon-boy and J-T, this is a quick show and Js got nothing apart from some useful DRUG taking tips! We discuss mostly bad parenting and child deaths and also sex offenders the perfect coupling! R.I.P. Whitney Houston. END SONG: 'SAVES THE DAY' - The End.

Hi there cock-fags this is another immature, sick and silly episode of the DKP! rejoice as Daves not on so the J train is, this week we discuss monkey baptism, Indian werewolf sisters, a man is fighting a council bid to shut down his rural swingers club, claiming he just throws saucy parties and another Jesus spotting! holy fuck!!

Hay there! This week flower stealing cunts, moose troubles Dave's final thoughts, political talk, fuck Eddie Murphy and lying c*unting priests AGAIN, and also awesome metal 8 yer old PS date rape hints! yay!

Here we again folks, me and the J train, we talk all things AIDS with J! We also talk about mad husbands, crazy Mexicans and also suicidal Indian man, we think they're bored and anyone who doesn't have access to this show is bound to kill themselves!

Hay there kids, yes its here the lesbian show, with our very own lezzar Emma!! We discuss porn, Virgina s, penises and everything else that we usually talk about, and even more than that all three hosts are in on this show, holy Jesus!!! The sound is a bit wonky but the content is still as shite as ever so enjoy our dear, dear fans.

Hello there folks, this is it, its finally here episode 39 of the DKP! And Jesus Dave's here! and J isn't...same old. This week we discuss the New Year celebrations, balloon rides gone wrong, mothers and their son's sperm and also crazy hecklers!!

This is episode 38 of the DKP! Our chirstmas episode yay!! Get your eggnogg out and your dick and say happy birthday jesus!! We have the Pope fading fast, drunk santa rapists, really SHITTY tattoos and even a dangourous J!! R.I.P Christopher Hitchens, warrior!!

JUST A SHORT HELLO, BUT WE'LL BE BACK TO THE FULL SHOW REAL SOON! Hay there kids, this isn't a typical show, this isn't even episode 37, oh no, this is our on-the-road FLOGGING MOLLY gig recording, yes thats right folks jon-boy and dave take you to see the awesome irish punk rock legends, and we also talk about anal play in a very rough pub, joy!

Episode 36 out now!!! Drunken brothers, failed call to 'kiddie fiddler john', calls from the DHB then another from Mr pink and thats not to mention all the piss stories you'll hear AND evidence of the fabled shit-hand-wank story!! although the show is a complete debacle, you might enjoy it!!

Holy shit, here we are again! This is it, no not Michael jackson's dvd release, no its DKP coming at ya! This week Dave's off again so we rip him a new ass hole joy! So we do a shitty dare, sorry maybe more next week, who knows...anyway we discuss woman stepping into her dead horse, Saddam look-a-like gets forced into porn and a pedophile football ref gets his just deserts before kick off, score!!

Welcome, this week was a quickly thrown together affair so suck it if you don't like it, but we promise the DARES episode is coming next show! We discuss the top 20 deaths of the year, women breast feeding calfs, and then theres the DogHouse Bastards's Claire calling in to discuss faecal hand shakes, joy!!

Hi there folks this is episode 34, and all three hosts are in studio! We discuss mad, crazy, mental women! Also talk about lesbian transexuals, the Songify crew, Charlton Heston and his guns and also sinful lamp post thieves.

This is a quick show, so sorry if its not up to our usual standards...yeeeeah. This episode is brought to you by dave and jon-boy, no j!! we discuss old people faarting, bull fighting face lifts, and also darwin awards and not to mention mothers washing shitting pants. Get in!!

Hay there folks, this week dave is absent again so yor stuck with jon-boy anf j-train, you lucky sods! This week we discuss Michael Jackson's doctor's perscription, heagehog vs a kitchen knife, and a woman getting hit by a car whilst on the toilet!! We also get joined by Mr Pink from the DHB radio show!

Holy crap, here it is episode 31 an extra long episode for you guys 'cause we missed a couple of shows and yes we're drinking but it has been two weeks since we did a show so celebrations are in order! Also apologises to scott from the DHB, J was upset and thinking of THE ROYAL AND DOODALL SHOW not to mention he's a racist, xenophobic wanker. We discuss pedophile denials, rescue hot dogs and also daughters handing over their shit to help cure their mothers!

Hay folks here we are at episode 30! No j-train this week for shame! but we discuss holidays from hell, as Jon-Boy goes off on holiday to tan up and get pissed and probably burnt. We discuss the 9/11 anniversary , ghetto babies, holiday makers being decapitated and also shit sprinkling shoppers! No show next sunday.

Hello kids we're here and Dave's with us this week as he's finished banging his older lady over last weekend and now he's up for a show! We talk shit, eels and make-shift torture chambers! We also get a call from a gay podcaster, and also a voicemail from a certain memeber of the DHB looking for advice from the DKP boys! Jesus H Christ!

Hi there folks, episode 28 here! daves off on one of his gigs so its left to the Jtrain and Jon-boy have to take the lead! And we get drunk, so be warned! We have the along waited M challenge, man beating up a baby, a woman sticks herself to the kitchen and also a crazy ginger kid! We also have a phone in from a Scotsman! Yay!

Hay there and welcome to epsiode 27 of the DKP! With special sit-in guest Soggy D! We talk all things animal from shark attacks and the best way to deal with 'em, to also discuss cats being microwaved. We also discuss a man who shoots his chest pains away!

hay there folks episode 26 out now, and yes we're had a drink so be warned! We talk millionaire dogs, London riots, Soggy D is single and out for love, we also talk about nuclear reactors in flats and mums injecting kids with shit!!!!

Hay there yes its here! Episode 25, the racist show with MINSTREL the Asian! We discuss teachers head butting kids, boy kills girlfriend for a bet, the Vatican and mob banking exploits, and the J-train even takes a racist quiz, the results wont startle you!

Hay there joiners of the DKP, here we are episode 24! Also happy to announce our first female guest, yes that’s right the mysterious M is in studio. we have our first talk about sploshers, don’t know what one is? then tune in! We also discuss baked beans!