The Fart Locker

There is a demon in your computer

Priest Gadai of the Austin ISUPK comes back to the studio to chat. This is sort of a part two, Gadai had talked to us on Bad News in our last episode, and to relaunch The Fart Locker we wanted to start right where we left off. The ISUPK is widely considered a hate group, and are mostly known for their aggressive street preaching. Ike Rafferty plays Toby the white slave and Miles Johnson plays Doctor Yakub.   The video portion is currently only available on YouTube, this will be chagned in the future!    https://youtu.be/bkWY2VjIKk4    

Episode 71 - Fish Tank Rap Battle with Tai Nguyen, Pawn Stars, My Name is Earl and JT Kelley's sounding excursion. Full Rap Battle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvOduEQBRqc&t=77s 

This week JT Kelley learns that Oklahoma has a professional sports team and also shares with us the biggest scam he's ever witnessed from a caricature artist. Robert and JT also review The Blindside 14 years too late.

This week, Satchel calls the Buffalo Soldier and we also get to hear stories of the creepiest things JT has ever done. 

This week JT has his buddy Dixon Hogan on to talk about some crazy times at the tattoo shop and stroll down memory lane about their time in Sacramento. You can currently find Dixon at All Saints Tattoo in Austin, TX for those looking for ink.    Follow Dixon on Instagram @dixonhogan 

This episode JT and Robert decide their Halloween costumes for 2023.

This episode, JT calls a local shop to spread the good news about councilman Rhinestone. Robert and JT talk about comedians at festivals and their personal tastes in the bedroom (hint: it involves funnel cake).   

JT is bringing in the new year with Ava Kane the dominatrix. She shares some wild stories of her line of work and how the business also works behind the scenes.    You can find Ava Kane on Instagram @missavakane and TikTok @section_8_condo

This week, JT and Robert remember the days of when the internet was still the wild wild west and you could cyber bully your friends at school. JT also announces his return to BJJ. Link to the video in this episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-fASwClaNA 

This week, Robert stumbled upon Brian Welch (guitarist from Korn) giving a speech at a local church in Bellevue, TN and gives JT a full report.

This week we have some new calls to a familiar guy for your ears. JT catches up with the one and only Dino Man and then proceeds to call some dispensaries. We also take an official stance on Kanye West.

This week JT and Robert get deep in the weeds with Dr Andrew Kelley, who happens to be JT's older brother and has a PhD in New Testament. Robert asks him a few questions related to Christianity and the bible, since the last time he read one was 15 years ago and had pictures in it.

NEW CALLS THIS WEEK. We also talk about Robert's former high school classmate turned murderer, getting recognized in Tulsa and more.   Article related to the Courtney Clenney murder trial: https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/crime/article264361166.html    

Johnny Taylor, Jr. is an American stand-up comedian, writer, actor, and podcaster from Sacramento, California. Taylor has released two comedy albums and a charity single on Stand Up! Records. His debut, 2014's Tangled Up in Plaid, reached No. 7 on the iTunes comedy chart.  Follow Johnny on Twitter and Instagram @hipsterocracy and check out his podcast The Hard Talk.

This week's episode features the one and only Juan Martinez, who you may have seen at Austin's Museum of the Weird, or anywhere else sword swallowing is needed. Juan shares his story of learning the various stunts you see at side shows and how it led to doing one of the hardest and most popular stunt of all - swallowing a sword. You can catch Juan do his act at Two Weird Dudes this Thursday at Parish.    Tickets: https://www.prekindle.com/event/97349-two-weird-dudes-entertainment-extravaganza-austin?utm_source=Vesta&utm_medium=LocalEventCalendar

This week JT and Fast Ronald shoot the shit about fireworks, Catholicism and we get a report on Christian yoga from JT. Two Weird Dudes happens September 15, 8:30PM at Parish. Tickets only $10! Get tickets to JT and Ronald's show HERE: https://www.prekindle.com/event/97349-two-weird-dudes-entertainment-extravaganza-austin   

This week JT reports in about his first week living in Tulsa. From going to the Unitarian Church across the street, to going to coffee shops that are actually churches. 

This week, JT Kelley made the big trek up to Tulsa, OK to move his life to for $10K and Robert was able to force an episode out of him by making calls from the road to chronicle the journey. From leaving at 9:30am, to getting lost in Dallas, we get to experience the road JT battled to Tulsa.   Message JT Kelley and let him know Parish hasn't announced his next show in September: ‪(469) 909-2985‬

This week we have special guest Roman Helmet Guy. You might have seen one of his Roman history facts come across your fyp recently on TikTok. He shares with JT and Robert some Roman history that JT never learned at homeschool, as well as some old ancient jokes. TikTok: @romanhelmetguy Insta: @romanhelmetguy

This week we're back with some of our favorite calls from recent memory in volume 3 of The Best of Satchel Rhinestone!

This week, JT shares his story of riding the bus to Jackson, MS and Robert tells JT about the Whataburger reinforcements.    Be sure to go see JT Kelley perform for FPIA 2022 and show your support! JT goes on August 9th at Cap City Comedy Club. Get tickets here: https://www.capcitycomedy.com/events/60562 

JT Kelley returns from his honeymoon in NOLA. We also get an update from Ladder Guy finally.

This week, JT emerges with Matt Boyd and his tales from middle Tennessee and going to a knock off AA program. Matt also reminds us of the nightmare that is The Adventures of Pinocchio from 1996. You can follow Matt on Instagram @mattxboyd

This week's episode, Actor/Comedian/Salesman (a triple threat!) Brian Bogart joins JT and Robert to talk about bringer shows, scams and their shared telemarketing journey. Follow Brian on Instagram @brian.bogart

This week, Austin businessman and comedian Lando Shepard joins us from his car to talk about going vegetarian, his past life and more. 

After a few weeks away, JT tells us the full story of his experience at some local bible studies to try and make friends. 

This week it's just JT and Robert shooting the breeze about one year of doing The Fart Locker podcast and JT's first Jiu Jitsu tournament. 

On this week's episode, we sit down with pop-punk musician Anndy Negative and learn more about his music, releasing his single "When We Were Young" and being Canadian. JT also tells Anndy and Robert about black Israelites. Stream Anndy's music on Youtube, Spotify and anywhere else music is. Follow Anndy Negative on: Instagram - @anndynegative TikTok - @anndynegative

This week, we continue the journey with Satchel and Mohammed, plus we also call some coffee shops to durn down the music.  Note: we recommend turning up your volume for the last call.

This week chronicles the life and times of Mohammed from Baltimore and his affiliation with Satchel Rhinestone. We also get a story from Austin noise boy Fierce Deity.   Listen to Fierce Deity's "Cum 41" project here: https://doughgirltapes.bandcamp.com/album/all-killer-no-filler

The boys from KPISS' own show A Burning ATM (Mike Zorman and Erik Schwertfeger) log on to talk to JT and Robert about prank calls, noise shows and also their SNL audition characters.  You can tune into A Burning ATM online: https://kpiss.fm/show/a-burning-atm Follow A Burning ATM on Instagram and Twitter: @aburningatm  

JT and fellow comedian Hans Kim hang out and share some stories. We also hear another one of Satchel's serenades to a local business owner in the juice industry.   You can follow Hans Kim: Instagram: @DJHansKim Twitter: @DJHansKim Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/HansKimComedy

JT talks with artist and internet personality Destin, AKA The Cryptid System about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), which causes them to have multiple identities that come out on their own at random, or certain times. Destin goes into detail about their history with this disorder, the different identities they have as well as their efforts to help bring awareness to DID.   Follow The Cryptid System on: Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/thecryptidsystem TikTok: @cryptidids Instagram: @destindraws Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/destindrawsstore

Robert tells JT how his old apartment was used for human trafficking. JT also reveals he is rebranding himself. Our Super Bowl predictions are also the worst.

Unfortunately our guest this week bailed on us, but fortunately Robert pulled out some unreleased stories that Chuck Zukowski told us last Summer he'd been saving for a rainy day.   If you're a fan of Bigfoot or aliens, then this is for you.

JT asks his managers to put up or shut up on their numbers. We also check our messages. You can leave us a message at ‪(469) 909-2985‬.

This week, JT and Robert talk about fingers in butts and Muammar Gaddafi.

This week JT calls Graham Texas to let them know he sells cars for ANTIFA.

Comedian and professional snowboarder MK "Big Hog" Paulsen joins JT and Robert for some stories about his early onset mid-life crisis and the book Dune.    You can stay up to date with MK Paulsen on Instagram and  Twitter @mkpaulsen

This week, friend of the show musician Wyatt Corder comes on the podcast to talk a little music and a little MLM. JT also starts beef with security teams at shopping malls.   You can follow Big Wy and his brass band on Instagram @bigwybb and find them on Youtube.

JT tells Robert stories about times he's been fired from jobs for telling customers he's related to Sandra Bullock. Our next live show will be at The Creek and The Cave in Austin, TX on 01/14/2022 at 11pm! Get your tickets now at creekandcave.com

This week, we call around Mineral Wells in hopes of opening up a small business. Our next live show will be at The Creek and The Cave in Austin, TX on 01/14/2022 at 11pm! Get your tickets now at creekandcave.com

This week, Satchel checks in with The Dino Man, calls about a ladder on Craigslist and also gets advice about 14 year old boys. JT also serenades us with his favorite track in the hold music library. 

This week we're going down memory lane with some of the best calls made by Satchel Rhinestone!

This week, we are joined in the studio by Fast Ronald, comedian and professional vegan pastry chef. Ronald and JT swap stories of different scams, shoplifting and asking the hospital for slides. JT and Ronald also make some prank calls for a fully rounded out episode of The Fart Locker.   Follow Fast Ronald on Twitter @ITSFASTRONALD  

This week we are joined by Austin pop artist Kady Rain. Kady has performed on festivals ranging from Hot Summer Nights to Queer Riot to ACL Fest and has received accolades from a number of major outlets, including NPR, who named her song “RAD Moves” a Song of the Summer in 2018. Her self titled debut album is set to release in January 2022.    You can hear Kady's music on Spotify, Apple Music and other major streaming platforms.  

Satchel Rhinestone calls some coffee shops to let them know about his event. We also get some advice about relationships.   The Fart Locker is hosting its first ever live show at Creek and Cave on November 5, 2021 at 11pm. Featuring some of the funniest people in Austin, plus all new segments from JT Kelley. Go to creekandcave.com for tickets and we hope to see you there.

This week we are joined by the one and only Bak of The FeedBak Podcast! He tells JT of his time in the French Boy Scouts as a kid growing up and more.   Leave The Fart Locker a voice message at 469-909-2985. Funniest messages might be featured in future episodes!

On this week's episode, Hela the Hacker explains to JT and Robert what happened last week when Facebook's servers went down. We also discuss conspiracy theories related to it and more.