The Mind Whisperer

A far-ranging interview with David N. Meyer, cinema studies professor,  screenwriter and author of Twenty Thousand Roads: The Ballad of Gram Parsons and his Cosmic American Music; The Bee Gees: The Biography; and A Girl and A Gun; the Complete Guide to Film Noir. Our conversation spans the neurobiology of addiction, the so-called '27 club' (Hendrix, Joplin, Cobain), addiction as creative hijack, and covering figures from Beethoven to Miles Davis, to painter Georgia O'Keefe, filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard, and Francis Ford Coppola's The Conversation (1974).  

A short episode covering topics for my upcoming book: the erosion of civil discourse, 'slow motion disaster' and the collective trauma responses it induces, and a brief overview of how the psychological traits of cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias have corroded our public spaces.

An in depth conversation with Simon Fraser University professor Dr. Mark Fettes about Lewis Hyde's powerful book The Gift: How Creativity Transforms The World. Dr. Fettes is Associative Director of SFU's Imaginative Education Research Group. Show Notes: The buddhist psychotherapist mentioned is Jack Engler. You can find his updated commentary on his infamous statement "You have to be somebody to become nobody" in the book Psychotherapy and Buddhism (https://www.amazon.ca/Psychoanalysis-Buddhism-Unfolding-Jeremy-Safran/dp/0861713427" The painter referenced as doing the portrait of Winston Churchill is Graham Sutherland.  

We all want to feel self-love, self-acceptance. And yet we also crave approval, connection, belonging. Today we reveal a critical element to getting the balance right!

Emerging multidisciplinary research is giving us a lot clearer a picture of what defines truly happy individuals. The results may surprise you. It is certainly within all our reach.

With Valentine's Day approaching, it's timely to look at why so many relationships end up in breakup! How do we end up dating the same kind of person in a different package, and how do we change the pattern?!

It seems so straightforward: we make a resolution, plan and schedule it, and soon enough we fall back into old patterns. What drives this annoying, undermining phenomenon, and how to really make lasting change?

Rage, untethered and unfocused often points itself inwards, yet it masquerades as vengeful action. Truthfully, addiction is self-destructive; while seeming to mask the hurt, and buffer us from those that have hurt us, it really just turns us against ourselves.

As the US congress faces a full government shutdown over the budget, the extremism of the conservative agenda seems to invite this empirically-researched question. Find out how studies going back 60 years still stand up to suggest this hypothesis holds true.

So much of life is difficult and overwhelming, and despite spending much of our time chasing pleasure, we still feel unhappy. How can we change that in an instant?

The unresolved injustices and traumas of childhood can leave us with significant internalized distortions about ourselves that can misdirect unmet needs into self-aggression. How to we begin the journey to self-repair?

The search for the perfect soul mate leads us to the difficult truth of what we need to work on in ourselves. Our patterns are merely re-manifestations of many cycles of habitual behaviour which, if we realize and choose wisely of our partner, can lead us away from deeper separation.

August 6th is the anniversary of the dropping of the atomic bomb and total annihilation of Hiroshima, Japan, and three days later Nagasaki. How does history look back on this militarily rationalized mass murder of civilians, and what do we learn about our own dissociation from this act of violence.

It began with the 'crackberry' syndrome: those amongst us who were constantly glued to their handheld device, emailing, texting. No more in history have we been so pervasively distracted than with social media tech. What does this say, and how can we work with this as an aspect of our habitual patterns?

In the first episode, we covered emerging research on the impacts of social isolation on early childhood and the brain/psyche. In today's show, we explore the relationship with ourselves, and how to approach loneliness as an affliction of mind.

Decades-spanning research has been exponentially boosted by brain scanning technology, giving us a window into the social, physical and psychological impacts of loneliness/isolation, and how we need to prioritize attention to early parenting, schooling and social engagement in later life.

So often, despite our best efforts to be 'positive,' we keep getting stuck in our familiar negative patterns. How do we connect with and transform our deepest values and scripting, in order to experience limitless joy?

Anger, to paraphrase Siddhartha Gautama (The Buddha) is "like holding a hot coal and expecting the other person to get burned." How do we intercept and transform this explosive emotion in a mindful way?

From chronic pain, to mental and emotional anguish, find out why and how we can minimize our suffering in the face of painful experiences.

The quest for perfection can lead us to a self-destructive relationship with ourselves. How is perfectionism a symptom of negative conditioning?

What do the various Buddhist texts mean when discussing 'no-self?' If there is no self, how do 'we' exist, and know who we are? Where will I go if I recognize that Self is a concept to begin with!

Researcher Brené Brown writes about shame, vulnerability, and the relationship between gratitude and joy. What does she mean by "low tolerance for vulnerability makes joy forboding."

"They give birth astride of a grave, the light gleams an instant, then it's night once more," wrote Samuel Beckett in Waiting For Godot. What do we make of this existential tension, and the will towards creative expression in the face of impermanence!   

In our most difficult moments, we realize that our greatest suffering comes from a feeling of 'not being there' for ourselves when we need us most. There is a painful awakening that we are estranged from ourselves. We can begin to soften and experience vulnerability within, as a strength.

Forgive, but don't forget--a very potent saying. We often mistake forgiveness for 'letting someone off the hook' for something. However, when we hang on to hurt, it is we who are on the hook....

To parahrase Gandhi, "You must be change you wish to see in the world." Today on the show, embodying change and leadership...

Many times, what makes a challenging situation or emotion more difficult is our initial urge to rush in and change it or avoid what it evokes within us. Making space creates a little breathing room, and often the right solution presents itself.

How do we take full ownership of our actions and what shows up in our lives? We continue this discussion by looking at self-responsible negotiation vs. blame.

How do we take full ownership of our actions and what shows up in our lives? In this conversation I discuss the critical aspects of becoming truly accountable, and how to move from victimhood to self-actualization.

"I don't likes spiders and snakes," as Jim Stafford's hit song lamented...Apart from primal fears, why do we experience phobias?

Einstein defined madness as "doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results." Why do we fall into patterns that don't serve us, and how do we change?

It is said you can truly gauge the character of a person by the way they manage stress and difficulty. We cannot avoid difficult challenges, however we can minimize their impact while increasing our choices.

We move very quickly in this information age. And while information technology is supposed to make us more efficient, it actually just increases our workload. Find out how slowing down can make you more productive!

Most of our lives are guided by our parents' values, school programming and social/class expectations. But what about YOUR inner drive to fulfill your true purpose?

As my old teacher said, "familiarity, without respect, breeds contempt." How can a warm feeling turn so cold, so vengeful, so fast, and what can we do to change that pattern in our lives?

Letting of loved ones and our relationships can present us with our most challenging moments. Why is letting go so difficult?

How is it we can become addicted and desensitized to everything from substances like sweets, to shopping, and now--research proves--internet sex?

A recent Wall Street Journal article evoked a strong critcial response from Jezebel.com writer Lindy West. Today we discuss the issues, not from Lindy's insights, but looking at how intimacy can actually be the block to desire in long-term relationships.

What does it mean for a relationship when we argue? What happens if conflict surfaces early on in dating/relationship? Is this a sign of incompatibility? Shouldn't things be 'easy'? This episode looks at conflict in relationship, breaking through myths, and applying Attachment Theory to get a better understanding of how we function and make (un)conscious choices.

Narcissism is a word that pops up frequently in common use, but what does it mean? Are you aware that it pertains to a particular set of negative psychological traits?

From alt country forebearer Gram Parsons to legendary pop group The Bee Gees, David N. Meyer examines the interior/exterior lives of artists, and the toll exacted upon them by the creative process and pressures of public and commercial pressures. David N. Meyer is the author of Twenty Thousand Roads: The Ballad Of Gram Parsons And His Cosmic American Music (Random House); as well as an upcoming biography on the Bee Gees for De Capo press. He is also professor of Cinema Studies at the New School.

We delve into what is deemed the 'hard problem' of Psychology. Is consciousness, and more importantly, psychological health, determined by 'bottom-up' or 'top-down' regulation and activity?

In this episode we explore the relationship between intimacy and sex, for those seeking a partner, and those in long-term relationships. Is intimacy the enemy of desire, or can desire be made the bed-fellow of intimacy?

**To listen/view this show, please visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gE2E54nkcQ or http://www.facebook.com/TheMindWhispererShow Due to a technical problems, the live radio program here was cut short during broadcast. >>>Codependency is an oft misused term. While it most significantly applies to a relationship with an addicted partner, codependency has broader implications for healthy boundaries.

Find out why we can get so wired to the compulsive desire, and how delayed gratification most often supports healthier outcomes in our relationships, purchases, etc.

From bullying to homophobia, from domestic violence to terrorism, where are the seeds of hatred sown, and how can we work to overcome them?

There is a great 'luxury' as Chogyam Trungpa describes it, in indulging our passions in the moment, but they can become destructive. And the confusion that arises can be a kind of luxurious escape from reality and truth. Join us today as we explore this very fascinating notion.

How do we surrender in erotic love without losing ourselves? How do we meet in union to realize ourselves fully, without falling into boredom, disinterest or contempt? All this and more today...

How do we surrender in erotic love without losing ourselves? How do we meet in union to realize ourselves fully, without falling into boredom, disinterest or contempt? All this and more today...

This may sound rather esoteric, but it is really about connecting with the juicyness of all aspects of experience in everyday living, as a way of evolving towards absolute awareness.