The Sweetest Plum Podcast

The final show live at The Rochester. Thanks to everyone who came along, and to everyone who has ever listened, or randomly shouted one of our references at us in public.  A very big Boom Boom Pow to all of you.   

After 12 years, 200 episodes, and 1863 anecdotes about kids Declan grew up with in Bulleen, it's time for us to finish the podcast and head back to the family farm for good. Thanks to everyone who listened along the way.  But we're going to do one last final gig at the Rochester Hotel, Saturday 27 August, at 730pm. So come along and help up go out with a Boom, Boom, Pow. This one probably will sell out, so if you can book tickets now at this link. We'll leave the podcast up for about a month so you can download any old episodes.  A Boom Boom Pow.  Love Dec and Nick 

For the second part of our 200th celebration we are joined by the great man, Steven "Greaser" Gates, just doing some of his very best work.  Donate 

Against all the odds, we have somehow stumbled to 200 episodes.  Proudly bought to you by our new sponsors... Great Ocean Road Kebab Cocktails Mortgage Joint - Sharpen your mortgage by .01% today.    Donate a Christmas Bonus   

Dec has a run in at the Mac shop, Nick deep dives down the trade radio rabbit hole, and we launch a new segment, "Dad's Doubling Down". Tell us about the time your dad doubled down on a dumb decision, and win a free car tyre filled with burning hot melted cheese, delivered directly to your door.  Troll us at the following places...  Twitter  Facebook  Instagram  Or Donate and Nick will put you in his prayers. 

Discussed: Dec's dubious career advice from Sean Hughes, the melancholy of the modern milkbar, the existential terror of tattslotto shops and why Nick is done with the Man in the Mirror.  Donate and support our output of up to 3 whole episodes a year.  Troll us on social media: Facebook  Twitter Instagram   

After a long stint at the family farm, we're back to discuss pretty much the same stuff we always discussed: Richard Roxburgh, Tony Martin, Gary Sweet, Cameron Ling, Cameron Ling's Mother, Simon Black, Slash, and some guy that Dec's dad clipped on the way into the MCG in 1999. Plus those annoying people who try to sound like they're way busier than they actually are.  Huge apologies it took so long to get another one out. Thanks for hanging in there.     

DISCUSSED: Shane Warne, Sam Newman, Joe Hachem, Andrew Demetriou, Julian Assange, and one of the great Poker Tournmanent Operators, Fat Crumpet. ALTERNATIVE TITLES: The Chinwaggers, Nick and the Fatman, The Smooth Operators, Sam and the Fat Crumpet (Live from Jupiter's Casino on the Gold Coast) Buy our greatest hits album, The Plummest  Donate    

Discussed: Lauryn Hill, Dustin Diamond, Smellovision, the new little Irish guy on Studio Ten, Craigie, Lou Richards, Shane Bourne, and Rest in Peace the blue m&m Alternate titles: After Winter Must Come Spring, The Great Winery in the Sky, A Love Letter to Melbourne, Always Bet on Blue.  Proudly bought to you by our new unofficial sponsor, Louie The Lip 2012 Chardonnay.  Buy our Greatest Hits Album, The Plummest  Donate

Discussed: Old Men with Metal Detectors, Gary Ayres' Calf Muscles, Irish Grandmothers who bury money and Nick really struggles with the whole concept of "I'm a Celebrity" Proudly bought to you by our new sponsor "Oyster McDildo". For an unforgettable seafood experience get down to Oyster McDildo's and tell them Nick and Dec sent you.  Thanks to the great man, John Flanagan, for just doing some of his very best country music work. Check him out here.  Grab our Greatest Hits album, The Plummest, here.  Or just reach deep down in the pockets of your cargo shorts and donate a few dollars to the show here.   

Our first time in the same room since #dictatordan took away our basic human rights. Discussed: Simon Black, Cash Converters, Big Star, Ab Crunches, the Search for the greatest out suburban nightclub continues and How yellow is too yellow for a chardonnay? Buy our greatest hits album, The Plummest.  Or donate some loose change (or a hundred dollar note on a fishing line)   

Other possible titles: A Day in the Chair, Voyage to the Deep Suburbs, The Cash Converters Incident, and The Wild Turkey Special.  Proudly bought to you by two new sponsors: Chuckamungas Bar and Grill Greensborough and South East Asian Hammer Pants PTY LTD. Hopefully our greatest hits album will be by early next week.  In the meantime...  Donate to the Sweetest Plum and get a Plum stubby holder  Follow on Facebook  Ogle us on Instagram  Troll us on Twitter     

Discussed: Chairman Dan, Daniel Riccardo's Eyeball Camera, Dec's very dubious ARIA nomination and Van Morrison's even more dubious musical protest against Lockdowns. Also, Nick gives us his 2020 Trade Radio review featuring, Matt Rendell, Brendon Goddard, Stephen "Philosophical Sos" Silvagni, Damian Barrett and Kane Cornes. Donate  (and we'll send you a stubby holder)  Or troll us on social media... Twitter   Facebook  Instagram   

Nick calls for an emergency podcast to vent his rage at Dyson bagless Vacuum cleaners. Dec meets some lovable locals at a Diggers Rest petrol station. And Eddie McGuire celebrates his honourary citizenship of Queensland with his 19 year old son at classy Gold Coast nightclub the Pink Flamingo. Donate for a free stubby holder Or troll us on social media... Facebook   Twitter  Instagram     

End times are upon us and The rapture is imminent (according to gary Ablett, so we get to the bottom of What's really going on and who's behind it. Plus Pat Cash, Henri Leconte, Daniel Andrews and an anecdote Dec has surely already told before Proudly brought to you by the "Old Age Pensioner Franking Credits Bonus Bet" on your TAB app. (*Only available on select greyhound races) Donate and get a stubby holder Follow on Facebook  Instagram   

Declan's Grandma's strict dinner rules, Leigh Matthews' comedy career, Bec Judd's new career in aged care, and Con the Fruiterer's foray into fine wine.  Bought to you by our new sponsor Bec Judd's Forever Home for old people.   Donate and get a stubby holder Follow on Facebook  Instagram     

Possible other titles: The Power of Being Present, The Etymology of Railroading, The Raw Power of the Jet Ski, Coming Face to Face with God and Hmmmm? Discussed Pat Cash, Shane Warne, Leigh Matthews, and Dennis Hopper.  Follow on Facebook Troll us on Twitter Instagram (For erotic photos of NBL basketballers in the 1990s)  Donate (and get a free Plum stubby Holder)

A short podcast recorded just before stage 4 restrictions in Melbourne. Why the AFL grand final should be played in International Waters, why Nick is better than everyone else, and why your seafood goo should always be toasted.   Thanks to our new sponsors... "Chicken, Seafood, and Dumpster" - Free document disposal with every quarter chicken and chips.   "The Funny Bastard Hotel" still operating 7 days a week during stage four restrictions. No face mask required.  Follow us on Facebook Twitter  Instagram  Donate and get a free Big Boy Stubby Holder.

A two deleted episodes, we finally managed to record a whole episode.  Other Possible titles: Ghost in the Machine, A Full Interactive Multimedia Experience, A cap based Monologue, Release the Cute Little Piggy.  Facebook  Twitter  Instagram  Donate   

It's too painful to write down. Have a listen and hear two broken men try to explain/excuse/console themselves. With a bonus comedy sketch from deep in the previous employer archives because we felt bad.  

Dec's Osteopath to the Stars, The Return of Trade Wins Radio, and we ask the big question, should you roll it forward? And somehow we make it through a whole episode without once mentioning Joe Hildebrand. #livephoner #rollitforward  Donate and get a big boy stubby holder Facebook  Instagram  Twitter  

Other Possible Titles:  A Shane Jacobson Sidebar, Shane Jacobson's Contractually Obligated Caravan, Have your A**e Cake and eat it, On the front lines and loving it, The Greatest Hits of Harry Laconic Jnr and Zoom Zoom Zoom Let's go back to my room.   Starring:  Joe Hildebrand, Shane Jacobson, An Unnamed Former TV Star, Scrooge, Harry Connick Jnr and Craigie.  Donate to stop the brand going dark Follow Us for #constantcontent Instagram  Twitter  Facebook     

Welcome to the quarantine lockdown iso-f##kfest! In this episode we'll find out Why Chris and Bec Judd keep locking their tradies in Optus Oval, Why Declan struggles to do dinner at the table, and what happens to Nick's brain after watching way too many hours of Joe Hildebrand on Studio Ten. Donate to keep the brand shining bright Facebook  Twitter   Instagram   

Our first podcast since the ten year anniversary, recorded live from isolation. We record in two different houses and don't totally stuff it up.  Cultural references: Jimmy Page, Bec Judd, Pro Hart, Campbell's Cash and Carry, Delilah, Paul Kelly (not the good one).  Facebook  Instagram  Twitter  Donate 

Live from the Rochester Hotel, it's our ten year anniversary show, recorded just before everyone went into lockdown. Features poetic tributes, all year round trade radio, Nick's TV pitches, and a conclusion to the Scott Fisher Arc.  Thanks to everyone who has listened over the last ten years.  A Boom Boom Pow Facebook Twitter  Instagram  Donate     

Other possible titles for this episode:  Airborne Chilean Beans, Sucking on the Bus Stop Hole, Fisto in the Shoulder, Ready or Not, Aromatic Advertising, The Miseducation of Declan's Osteopath.       Outdated references: He-Man, Moss-Man, Fisto, The Fugees, Alcopops, Margaret Court.  Plus we talk a lot about what might happen for ten year gig/Episode 180/Friday the 13th March. Grab tickets here.   

In another brand new podcast rebrand, Nick shows you why he's smart, and why he knows business.  Also...  Buy tickets to our ten year anniversary gig on Friday March 13 at the Rochester Hotel.  

As voted by our audience, our brand new podcast, "Flummoxed By Joy"  Outdated references:  Shane Jacobsen, Scott Fisher, Bruce Bolden, Baker Street, Man O Man, Jason Dunstall, Blue Murder, Richard Roxburgh, Tony Martin, Pat Cash.  Facebook  Twitter  Instagram  Donate     

Discussed: Maurie Fields, Shane Bourne, The Great Aussie Joke, Chris Anstey, A Shirtless Scotty Fisher, Michael Jordan, Robot Vacuums, James Packer, Declan's Drunk Irish Relatives.  And Vote Now for your favourite new Sweetest Plum Podcast: Why do they say that? You idiom; Flummoxed by Joy; The Lark and The Laugh; I'm Smart, I know Business; Packers to the Rafters; Have a Crackronym; Too Much Joy, Too early. Or feel free to invent your own one that we've forgotten. Vote on social media with #plumpodcastempire Facebook Twitter Or follow us on Instagram for moderately offensive photoshops of Nick's head on nude statues.  

Alternate titles: Nick throws himself under the bus, Nick's guide to Melbourne Laneway culture, Space Demons, How to meet girls by firing out lies, One foot on the Urinal cake, The Laneway Blasting Game. Bought to you by the brand new app: FuckMyRestaurant. Follow on facebook Twitter Instagram Send us a Christmas Bonus  

A short podcast due to illness. Another longer, less diseased episode out before Christmas. Discussed: The Fine Art of Sculpture, Michelangelo, Dodgy Massage Establishments, Western Sydney Wanderers, A-League. Follow Us on Facebook Instagram Twitter  

Discussed/Debated/Debased this week... Trade Radio, Nick Dal Santo, Sam McClure, The Oval Office,  murderers, the Tradies on the building site next to Nick's new house, Pier Fishermen, and Nick's Fanfare for the Common man.  Donate and have Nick add you into his prayers Follow on Facebook Instagram Twitter  

DRAFT TITLES: Back in Bow River, The Content Cheater, Top and Tail, New Years Eve 1997, Rock the Rotunda, The Uprising, Scott Cam: An Elite Everyman  IMPLICATED IN THIS EPISODE: Scott Cam, The Block, Cold Chisel, Jimmy Barnes, Tim Burton, Some vain bloke Dec went to uni with, Pier Fishermen, The Henderson Kids. Donate to become part of the wider community (and join the uprising) Harass us on Facebook - Instagram - Twitter

Dedicated to all our friends from Under Tens Cricket. Discussed: Declan's very advanced child, Nick's Embouchure technique, The poetry Phillip Larkin and Why Nick never allowed The Wiggles in his house.   If you want Nick keep you in his prayers, Donate Here and join the wider community Send all your correspondence, user generated content and pictures of Giant Nutella Containers to...  Facebook Instagram Twitter

Other Possible Titles:  Twisting the Knife, Grab the Parmagiana by the Tail, The Vasectomy Obsession, Nicotine Dreams.  References:  Vince Colosimo, Rutger Hauer, Dr Snip, Paul Barry, Paul Eddington Bought to you by our inaugural sponsor Young Henrys. (For once an actual sponsor, not one we just made up) Best correspondence/user generated content on the next episode wins a slab of Young Henrys.)  Follow us on Facebook or Instagram or Twitter Or Donate and we'll send you a bunch of stickers and say nice stuff about you on the next episode.   

Other possible titles:  Tipping into Irrelevance, On the edge of the youth zeitgeist, Pumping It up and Mucking Around, The Puppet and the Master, Rated X and It Takes a Village to Raise a Podcast Outdated references in this episode: Pearl Jam, Tony Martin and Alex Dimitriades in Wildside, Geppetto, Corey Worthington (Bernardi), The Comedy Company.  Links   Donate (To become a part of the wider community) Facebook (To join the conversation) Instagram (To see a raft of images which are tenuously connected to the podcast) Twitter (To abuse, troll, and send death threats to us)  

Other possible titles for the episode:  Just a Boat Ride, Deliverance Style, Blue Light Disco, The Meaning of DNA, You Don't Complete Me, Car Boot Party.  Topics discussed:  George Clooney, Richard Kind, Jerry Maguire, 24 hour Pancake parlour, Damian Cupido, Burt Reynolds.   Donate to get our bonus online content easter egg and stickers  Like us on Facebook to be bombarded by random plum references 

After a few months off we come back with some big questions:  Is it okay to rat out your soft mates? Is barracking a form of sexual release? How many times can we discuss "Ethnic Dad, Johnny"? What kind of pranks are George Clooney and Matt Damon actually playing on set? Is Nick a George Clooney apologist?  And please send through your 50 word blurb to describe Nick Maxwell (must contain at least one mention of the word dark). Best blurb wins a "Sweetest Plum Rocks Cumbah Grammar" Sticker. Plum Facebook  Twitter  Instagram

Live from the European Bier Cafe, both of us are unwell, and Steven Gates is extremely hungover, but highlights include Nick's very topical Mary Poppins gangland musical, based on events from 10-15 years ago and his campfire performance of Dave Brubeck's Take Five.  Send all correspondence/abusive messages via these platforms... Plum facebook  Plum Instagram  Plum Twitter Get Sweetest Plum rocks stickers  

A gratuitous promotion for our live gig, Sunday, 31 March, 430 Pm, European Bier Cafe. Plus five tips for getting the most out of your Vanuatu holiday! With thanks to our brand new sponsor, Penthrox.  Get tickets here.    

Nick loves Italian Food, Italian restaurants love Nutella, Nick does not love school reunions, but he loves Jammin'. And everyone loves a pie and sauce.  Grab tickets to our live gig here And grab our new stickers here  Or just lurk on our instagram page here 

Rejected Episode Titles:  Third Time's a Charm, Dedicated to the Boys in Blue, A Shit Ton of Pies, An Underwhelming Existential Nightmare, The Return of Pud and Mudguts and I Can't Believe I Said That!!!?!

Implicated in this episode: Copperplate Pencils, The Face Magazine, a kid called Heath, Midnight Oil, Dave Brubeck, Slipknot, Karl Stefanovic, Craig Hutchison, SEN, Kimbo and the Rooch.  Like on facebook  Or abuse us on twitter 

Ennui: (noun) A feeling of listlessness and dissatisfaction arising from a lack of occupation or excitement. Things contributing to the Ennui: Kane Cornes, AFL Trade Radio, Nick Giannopoulos, Real Estate Agents, Life Insurance Agents, Karl Stefanovic and the Yarbrough Family (otherwise known as the "Yarbies").   

It's the cocktail hour, so kick back with a series of liquids and slip an old CD of smooth jazz covers (or in Dec's case Prodigy remixes) into the five stacker. Plus, Nick's full review of Trade Radio's fashion choices, including Damian Barrett's Designer T-Shirts, and Kane Cornes' Hannibal Lecter mask. 

What we do is really a form of spoken jazz. 

Discussed/Defamed: Ben Elton, Doug Mulray, Ron Casey, Craig Foster, Fat Chef, Nick Giannopoulos, couples who ride motorbikes together. 

Implicated in this episode: Channel Ten's Pilot Season, Sam Dastyari, Declan's high school music teacher, the music teachers wife, a kid called Ralphy who played the saxophone in year ten, Blackheart and Sparrows, Radio Hosts who can't stop talking about how much they love their bosses. 

Implicated in this episode: Wayne Rooney, Robert DiPierdomenico, Craig Foster, Mark Bosnich, Happy Henry and some guy who stared at nick on the tram. Today's episode proudly sponsored by Dr Robert Hand, who's offering all Sweetest Plum listeners a free stomach pump.  

The brand rises once again, so let's celebrate with a slab of Crownies and a bottle of absinthe.