Tour De France for Idiots

Climb Climb Climb! Pudgy Carl is relentless and he seems to have a v-8 engine built in this year. He's just making things look easy at this point! Catch up on another stage with Mustard!

From time to time, we see a day of glory for a non-GC contender, even here in the last of the stages of the tour. Catch up on today's tour with Mustard!

Thanks for stopping by stage 17! A man in a rare pink uniform won today. That's something we've wanted to see for some time now! Tune in to catch up on the glorious mountain stage.

There have been no changes in the GC and we may have seen our very last spring challenge. With Tadej in a commanding lead, it feels like the tour is setting into stone...... but, we all know that ANYTHING can happen.

The tour isn't over but what a decisive day. This one is what we call "a slaughtering."

It wasn't the steepest climb but it's a climb nonetheless. Things are getting HILLY and the back & forth between the top contenders is still heated. We can't wait to see the tour become a battle of the climbers as we progress into the final stages.

Jasper takes a sprint finish and we can't decide if we care or not. Feels like the glory days of sprinting are a little behind us.

Sorry we missed ya yesterday folks! As they say, life gets in the way! Consider this our sincerest apology and we are on to the next one.

We had a boring stage today but we did NOT have a boring podcast!

The road got bumpier today and it ain't cause of the drama. The road was literally bumpy, in the form of many MANY miles of gravel sectors stretched along the course! This is how the old tour looked and it's fun to see it again!

History was made AGAIN! These sprint finishes are getting more an more interesting. It seems to be exclusively people we've heard of for years or people we've never heard of at all!

TT day is always interesting. Mostly because of the terrible helmets but.... AERO = SPEED as they say. Catch up on today's stage with Jelly and Mustard!

It feels like we are really digging in now. Another flat stage ended in a little less glory than yesterday but, it was still completed at blistering speeds! Catch up on Stage 6 with Jelly and Mustard.

HE DID IT!

The mountains sure do bring out the big guns. Tadej dropped the hammer and put the nail in today's stage. The GC batter KEEPS heating up and we are here for all of it.

Lesson learned... if you want to win a sprint, you can't be 385 people back! But, we finally had a fast one and that's what we were looking for!

We have a big tour ahead of us with strong GC contenders in the mix for the 3rd day now. We even have a big rider in yellow! Will he hang on? We'll see...

What a grueling start! We almost lost the Manx Missle! Catch up on all of this and more on the Tour De France for Idiots (by idiots) podcast!

Jelly and Mustard are back! The preview to this years 2024 Tour De France will get you geared up for the worlds greatest bike race! Tune in today!!

And so it ends... this edition of the worlds greatest bike race has come to a close and honestly, it was fantastic (and we aren't just saying that). We can't remember the last time 2nd place has pulled such a wild move and the winner was FAR from expected...... the Tour does not disappoint, even in the last inch. Tune in to hear our final Stage 21 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Yet another brutal climb to finish the last meaningful day of the tour. Of course, we all wanted Pinot to take a victory on his 10th and final tour but, the old dog had no new tricks. Jonas is in yellow and we celebrate the glory of the tour tomorrow on the Champs Elysees. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 20 of the 2023 Tour De France!

Emotion is the is a big part of the Tour. Bahrain-Victorious tallied up another emotional win honoring their fallen teammate. Overall, today was just a good ol' fashioned stupid-fast bike race! Continue tuning in to hear our Stage 19 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Today we witnessed the rare, beautiful, and successful breakaway. The peloton with all of it's hammer heads at the front could not reel the lone four in but rest assured, it was a game of a few mere meters. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 18 of the 2023 Tour De France!

Oh wow.... consider the lead officially extended. Jonas in yellow is looking more and more permanent as Pudgy Carl finally hits the wall known as "the final stages of the tour." Continue tuning in to hear our Stage 17 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

The firecracker lead that Jonas had just became an atomic bomb. WOW.... When they say "risking it for the biscuit" they are specifically talkin' about an all-yellow Jonas riding the time trial of a lifetime. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 16 of the 2023 Tour De France!

These cyclists can, apparently, just take a break from Le Tour but, our weary vocal chords will find no rest until Le Tour is complete! Check in to learn a little about the upcoming time trial with a VERY special guest, our very own Chief Idiot. Continue tuning in to hear our Rest Day Podcast along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Admittedly, we were all a bit late to today's stage coverage but wildly enough, we all tuned in for the cell-phone-selfie crash. C'mon people! Get those phones off the race course. Aside from that drama, we are still locked in on a TIGHT GC battle and some SERIOUS mountain climbing. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 15 of the 2023 Tour De France!

Ugh! You hate to see a wreck.... let alone 5 riders now out of this years tour! There was a dark cloud over todays stage that brought nothing but chaos and confusion. We certainly did get the drama we desire today. Continue tuning in to hear our stage 14 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Michal Kwiatkowski, the former World Champ and recently-turned "old dog" of the tour (a crazy thing to think about at 33 years old) pulled off a STEEP stage victory today. There are more mountain top finishes to come but a finish line on a 12% grade is far from flat. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 13 of the 2023 Tour De France!

Early in the tour, we simply couldn't believe we would be talking about Team Cofidis. Today, we talk about them a second time!! Ion Izagirre takes the stage win as we TRULY enter the alps! Continue tuning in to hear our stage 12 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Jasper Philipsen wins a 4th sprint finish! Although we continue to mourn a tour without Cav, we are NOT without our need for speed. That being said, we are getting close to the alps and things are about to get a little slower (albeit still incredibly impressive)! Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through Stage 11 of the 2023 Tour De France!

We thought we'd see the former force-to-be reckon with, Julian Alaphilippe pull off a victory however, it was Bilbo Baggins... wait.... *checks notes*... Pello Bilbao! Congrats to Bahrain! Continue tuning in to hear our stage 10 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Today you learn a little about the hosts, the tour thus far, and why HANDUP (a historically mountain bike focused company) even started a Tour De France Podcast. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through the The first rest day!

Michael Woods takes a heroic stage win not only for a daring effort but because it ended at the top of a volcano! The temperatures up there surely added to the heat building between our current GC contenders! Continue tuning in to hear our stage 9 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

This podcast was recorded on a Sad-urday. Yes it is technically Saturday but, the sadness of Mark Cavendish crashing out of his final tour is nearly too much to handle. We love you Cav. Today is for the Manx Missile. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through the stage 8 recap of the 2023 Tour De France!

The Manx Missile was close enough to taste a win yet, a history-making win alludes him. Naturally we learned about the importance of a lead out train as well as the importance of understanding Celsius vs. Fahrenheit. Continue tuning in to hear our stage 7 recap along with all of the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Almost everyone who has been on a group ride in their cycling career has experienced the moment they are left in the dust by another rider... Tadej Pogacar (aka Pudgy Carl) defined that action in a single moment of Tour De France history, today. Pogacar dropped Vingegaard harder than Snoop Dropped the hit Single Drop It Like it's Hot in 2004. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through the stage 6 recap!

Did you know that the Pyrenees had an official animal? Spoiler alert! IT DOES. What else did we learn? The GC contenders are doing everything they can to set the tone early. There are 21 days of racing but they are riding lights out early! Continue tuning in to hear the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

Happy 4th of July! There was no American victory (aside from the one way back when in 1776) but there was no English victory either. As for the highlight of the race, can you say "CRASH CRASH CRASH CRASH CRASH". You hate to see it but it sure does add to the drama. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through the stage 4 recap of the 2023 Tour De France!

HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, discuss the Sprint finish of Stage 3 and really dig deep on the overtly matchy-matchy attire of the various jerseys... and shorts... and shoes.. and socks. It's what we call "a lot". Continue tuning in to hear the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

At the end of the day, we felt as though Wout should have taken the win yet, we are talking about the Cofidis win.... And it's been a LONG time since we've talked about this. Tune is as the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, take us through the stage 2 of the 2023 Tour De France!

HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, discuss the EPIC twin-win of stage 1 along with the general feedback of their first time podcasting. It's not even the 4th of July and we've got Fireworks all around! Continue tuning in to hear the takes you didn't know you needed on this year's 2023 Tour De France.

In today's episode the HANDUP hosts, Jelly and Mustard, discuss, debate, and butcher every pronunciation in the pro peloton. This is the day before the first stage where they discuss who has potential, lack of team strategy, and what makes them qualified to discuss high level racing. Welcome to the Tour De France Podcast you didn't know you needed. Tune in to a recap of every race in this years 2023 Tour De France.