013 – SDP – From We To Me

Going through divorce is a time of great change.  One of the most significant changes is learning to live again as a single person. Going from "we" to "me" can seem daunting.We Live In A Couples Oriented SocietyThings like eating out, going to a movie, sporting events, worship services, vacation, etc. are all things that you've been doing as a couple for some time.  The thought of asking for a table for 1 at a restaurant or sitting by yourself at a movie seems terrifying.Going to church was very difficult for me.  Sitting down for Sunday worship services without my wife brought waves of sadness and regret.  Many well meaning people tried to cheer me up but it didn't really help.Doing Things On Your OwnYour ex may have taken care of the money, did all the cooking, did the shopping, fixed things around the house, or taken care of the car maintenance.  These are all things that you may now have to learn to do.You will now have to do all of the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.  If you're a custodial parent you now have full responsibility for caring for the children.  You can't come home after a stressful day at work and just relax because there are mouths to feed, homework to do and all of the other things associated with kids.You may have to learn to do things for the first time.  Cooking, laundry, vehicle maintenance, household repairs are all things that must be done even if you're not sure where to start.Q&AI answered an anonymous question about divorce after a long term marriage.  Basically it takes time and don't rush it.  Don't rush in to a new relationship but also don't write off the possibility of a new relationship down the road.  Your kids are hurting as much or more than your are so give them the freedom to grieve as well, but try not to bash your ex in front of your kids.  Don't vent to them about your problems with their other parent.  That's what friends and support groups are for.Wrap-upYou can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com herePlease consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it.If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you.And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at [email protected]