035. The People-Pleasing Trap: How Saying Yes Is Secretly Destroying You And Others

Are you putting everyone else’s needs above your own? In this episode, Dave Flenagan and Zoe Hirsch explore Dr. Stef Huber’s 2025 article "The People-Pleasing Trap," which uncovers the hidden costs of constantly seeking harmony at the expense of personal boundaries. Dr. Huber dives into the psychological roots of people-pleasing and how this behavior, often seen as kindness, can lead to exhaustion and resentment. Drawing on studies from PsychCentral, Psychology Today, and YouGov, she identifies common patterns and explains why so many struggle to say no. More importantly, she offers four actionable strategies to break free from the cycle and set healthier boundaries. Dave and Zoe discuss why people-pleasing is so hard to unlearn, how social expectations reinforce it, and what it takes to reclaim your own needs. Tune in for a conversation on self-worth, assertiveness, and the power of saying no. 🎧 Listen now—and start prioritizing yourself! Read the full, original article here on Medium and discover Dr. Huber's coaching services on her website www.stefhuber.com. Claim your free 45 min. Intro Coaching Session today to set some boundaries! Recommended books: The Art of saying no by Damon Zahariades. Not nice: Stop people pleasing, staying silent and feeling guilty by Aziz Gazipura. This podcast contains AI-generated content that has been reviewed to ensure quality and accuracy.