043: Why “Time Heals” Is a Lie: The 2 Ways We Handle Grief (And Why One Keeps You Stuck) feat. Kelli Sheumaker

Many of us were taught to handle grief in one of two ways: ignore it and hope it fades, or simply "be strong" and move on. But if I'm being honest, that approach doesn't heal—it just buries the pain. In this episode, Part 2 with grief recovery specialist Kelli Sheumaker, we dive into the complexities of grief and the different ways people cope with loss. We explore the importance of acknowledging grief rather than pushing it aside, the ripple effects of unresolved grief on relationships and physical health, and the transformative power of the grief recovery method. This conversation highlights that healing requires action and that grief recovery is an ongoing journey—not just about processing loss but about rediscovering joy and connection. We go beyond the typical association of grief with death. We discuss grief in living relationships—marriage, parenting, friendships—and the challenging dynamics where the relationship continues, but the pain endures. We also examine how unspoken expectations lead to disappointment, how unresolved grief can distort our memories of a person, and why getting accurate about a relationship—the good, the bad, and the unfinished—can restore clarity and empower us to make informed choices. And yes, we talk about the body. Not as a guilt trip or a simple "grief causes everything," but as an invitation to consider the impact of years of unprocessed emotional pain on your nervous system, sleep, health, and how you show up for the people you love. If you've ever thought, “I should be over this by now,” this conversation is for you. ⏱️ Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome + What Feel Free Again Is About 01:50 — The Two Paths: Avoiding Grief vs Healing It 04:51 — Getting Unstuck: Safe Space + Tools That Actually Work 09:53 — The Relationship Graph: How Grief Distorts Memory (and How to Get Accurate) 16:51 — Expectations = Planned Disappointments (Marriage + Living Relationships) 21:34 — The Ripple Effect: How Unresolved Grief Impacts Everyone Around You 26:59 — Grief in the Body: Sleep, Pain, Autoimmune, and Physical Symptoms 35:50 — Chronic Illness Grief: Mourning the Life You Expected 40:58 — Core Work First, Then Day-to-Day Maintenance Tools 46:08 — How to Work With Kelli + Final Takeaways + Closing Connect with Kelli: Website 1: www.renewedhopegriefrecovery.com Website 2: https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com/grms/kelli-sheumaker Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/renewedhopegriefrecovery/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/renewedhopegriefrecovery YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@renewedhopegriefrecovery Cole James, President of the Grief Recovery Institute, shares about the Power of Grief Recovery! Cole is dedicating his life to help people with grief. Now, grief is much more than just losing someone. Did you know that? You've probably heard of the Five Stages of Grief, right? Well, this goes much deeper than you think. Let me explain. Everyone has some type of grief in their lives, some haven't yet, but it's part of life. We can't escape it, BUT we can work through it. And you don't have to do it alone. Let's talk about it. We have trained Grief Recovery Method Specialists, who help heartbroken people, in Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia, the Middle East, Central America, South America, and North America. The Grief Recovery Method Certification Program is taught and available in multiple languages including: English, Spanish, Swedish, Hungarian, Ukrainian, and Russian. Our home office is in the United States and serves English-speaking nations and populations around the world, such as the United Kingdom, Canada, and the Commonwealth Nations. In addition, we have international affiliate offices in Sweden, Australia, Mexico, and Hungary. Our goal is to help as many people as possible, which is why our books have been translated into over 30 languages including: Spanish, French, Dutch, Portuguese, Japanese, Ukrainian, Russian, and many more. For more information visit: https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com/ #mentalhealth #grief #depression #sad