#048 - 4 Things to Stop Doing on Social Media If You're Ready to Put Relationships Above Algorithms

If you sell a high-ticket, high-value service/offer, then mastering the art of true relationship marketing will change everything. You’ll no longer feel overwhelmed by the draw to be posting right, left, and center, with fingers crossed that your dream clients with feel magnetized to you.You are not, and never will be a magnet.Building relationships online isn’t so different from real life. If you were at an in-person networking event, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t walk up to someone, thrust your business card under their nose, and shout ‘Do you want me to coach you?’.Yet every time someone sends me a connection request on LinkedIn or a cold DM on Instagram, with an ‘I do X for people like you. Do you want X? Will you pay me for X?’ it honestly feels like someone shouting in my face!So how do we use social media to build relationships instead of followers?1. Stop making it all about you.We spend all that time working on who our ideal client avatar is, their preferences, their pain points, their desires, their secret dreams, their biggest fears, and what they eat for dinner on the second Tuesday of the month…Then we tend to completely ignore all of that and get back to telling everyone about what we do.What if you redirected your content back to what you know about your ideal clients, and focussed on showing instead of telling.Demonstrate your understanding of what they want and need by sharing value that either addresses a pain point you know they have, or illuminates the way towards what they desire.Of course, I’m not suggesting you never share information about what you do, but it should probably be less often than you think.2. Stop being disingenuousDo you go on liking sprees? Have you ever hit like without even reading the caption to the post? Do you put the bare minimum emoji comments and consider your ‘engagement for the day’ box ticked? Sorry - not good enough. If you want to build relationships, then you need to get super intentional about your engagement. Make a ‘like’ from you mean something. Comment thoughtfully, and authentically, sharing your actual opinions. THAT’S relationship-building stuff.3. Stop needing reciprocationLeave the floor - the dance with insanity is over. No more liking content just to get liked back. Reward great content generously, without expectation. Cheerlead your clients and prospective clients. Support your peers and tell those that inspire you, well, tell them just that - they’re inspiring!4. Stop trying to go too far on the first dateI know you want to stand out, I know you want to grab that prospective client’s attention. I know you want them to know what you can do for them, but trust me, no one finds desperate attractive. Sorry. Diving into the DMs as soon as you connect with someone… on a scale of 1-10, how much do you love it when someone does it to you? Yeah thought so. It’s pants. Stop doing it. Stop rushing. Flirt in the feed for a while. The right time to move the conversation offline, or into messages WILL reveal itself. Be patient.Above all else, treat people on social media the way you would offline. Be someone you’d want a deeper connection with.If you’d like to explore your marketing as a whole and create that robust plan into which social media fits, then apply for a breakthrough session with me now: gillmoakes.com/apply This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit gillmoakes.substack.com