073. Foster Care: A Fresh Perspective with Hillary Richards

On the first day Hillary Richards and her husband got their foster license, they got a call to take in two small children. And they did. Their foster journey ended in adoption and Hillary is here with us today to share about her journey as a way to shine a light on the foster care system & provide a fresh perspective for all of us. She also shares new terminology that I wasn’t aware of. In Hawaii, foster families are referred to as “resource families.” She talks more about that on the show and why those terms are used. I have to say, that info and that new term really got me thinking. If you have ever considered foster care or feel it is on your heart to look into it, Hillary’s firsthand account will provide a loving lens through which to hear the real, the easy, the hard, the details—all of it. Hillary shared with me that when they were thinking about fostering, she sought out firsthand accounts to help with her decision and I’m honored to be able to host her on this worldwide platform to share her firsthand account as a way to support others who are considering fostering. In this episode, Hillary & I talk about: · Her family’s story about when and how they started their foster care journey · How fostering turned into adoption · The foster care licensing process · The rollercoaster of emotions of fostering: the rub is holding opposing forces at the same time · New terminology: in Hawaii, “Foster Care Families” are called “Resource Families” · Understanding that you’re a resource for the whole family · The nitty gritty of the foster care: visitation, lawyers, the court system, etc. · Visitation—how that works and what it looks like · Birth parents · The change, uncertainty, and loss…and the bright side, too · Loss of control · Feeling “touchy” in certain seasons of fostering · Dealing with insensitive comments · Being the buffer · Fostering when you already have children · How we are already managing transitions in our life · How parents play an active role when worries and “what if” moments are present · Foster & Resource Family support that is available · Overwhelm and exhaustion · The power of talking with friends who are also fostering · The importance of “making a buddy” who is also fostering · Formal and informal support · If training really prepares you for becoming a foster care family · Our internal biases about fostering, race, religion, etc. · How family members are often the first ones to step up when there is a need · How your current parenting skills will serve you well · How intrusive (or not) home visits are · Background checks, full medical history, financial questions, proof of marriage (if applicable) · Commitment time · Vacation and foster care (I did not know you cannot travel with foster children…but it makes sense!) · How fostering is portrayed in movies and storylines · Healthy curiosity and moving away from sensationalism so we can get closer to the good · Avoiding jumping to conclusions about foster children · Seeing everyone as the whole people they are · Ideas for moms who are interested in fostering · It’s never a bad thing to have more people invested in a child’s life Connect with Hillary: Instagram: @hrichardsclay Please Visit Today’s Sponsors: Homeschool Explained: www.homeschoolexplained.com Healthy Mama Meal Prep Course: www.elevatingmotherhood.com/sponsors