100 Days After My Layoff as an Engineer… The Truth

It’s been over 100 days since I was laid off from Big Tech after a 25+ year career in the tech industry. What followed wasn’t panic or fear, but something far more complex: a complete rewiring of how I think about work, identity, and purpose.The Shock of Losing More Than a JobAt first, the layoff felt surreal. There was a brief period of disorientation like a system crash without an error message. I applied to jobs almost reflexively, not out of desire, but habit. Work had become part of my identity, and without it, I was left asking uncomfortable questions:* Who am I without my job?* What was the point of all those late nights and sacrifices?Even without financial stress (thanks to years of saving and investing), I felt something unexpected: shame.The Hidden Mental Toll of Tech LayoffsScrolling through LinkedIn only made things worse. Everyone seemed to be thriving getting promoted, starting new roles while I felt left behind. It created a distorted reality where I was the only one “failing.”Reducing social media consumption became a turning point. Slowly, the shame faded. I began to see how much of my self-worth had been tied to external validation.Freedom Feels… StrangeWith time came an unfamiliar sensation: freedom. But freedom isn’t always comfortable.Without deadlines, pressure, and constant problem-solving, I experienced what I can only describe as stress withdrawal. The absence of challenge felt… empty.So I created my own.* Building side projects* Learning new skills* Creating content* Spending meaningful time with familyRedefining AccomplishmentIn Big Tech, solving high-stakes problems brought intense satisfaction. But it also made everything else feel insignificant.Now, that’s changing.Cooking a great meal for my family. Learning something new. Being present. These small wins are becoming meaningful again. My brain is recalibrating, like switching from junk food to something healthier, and finally appreciating the taste.Time Slows Down When You’re PresentOne surprising shift: time feels slower.Without autopilot work routines, every decision is intentional. Every moment is more present. It’s as if I’m experiencing more life within the same 24 hours.Is This a Better Life?There are clear downsides: loss of status, income, and prestige.But the upsides?* Autonomy over my time* Freedom to choose meaningful work* A deeper sense of fulfillmentFor the first time, I’m starting to wonder:What if this is actually better?If you’re navigating a tech layoff, questioning your career, or exploring early retirement, you’re not alone. This journey is messy, but it might just lead somewhere unexpectedly meaningful. Get full access to AsianDadEnergy's Newsletter at asiandadenergy.substack.com/subscribe