EPISODE · Sep 2, 2025 · 56 MIN
101: Why SMART Goals Don’t Work
from Unstuck with Jay Abbasi · host Jay Abbasi
Meet Theo. He rolls out of bed, head pounding from too many drinks with old friends, scrolling through Slack messages while convincing himself he’ll figure things out next weekend. For years, he’s coasted as a sales executive, hitting quotas but feeling stuck, stuck in the same habits, the same crowd, and the same cycle of instant gratification. Theo has no real goals beyond surviving the week. He listens to podcasts, scribbles half-baked ideas on bar napkins, and dreams of doing something bigger. But with no structure, no accountability, and no one pushing him to rise higher, his life feels full but not fulfilling. In this episode, Jay is joined by Caroline Miller, pioneering positive psychology expert, bestselling author, and one of the world’s leading voices on grit and goal setting. With 40 years of recovery, nine books, and decades of coaching leaders, Caroline has a powerful perspective on why traditional SMART goals often fail and what actually drives lasting success. Together, they explore the pitfalls of “realistic” goals, why behavior is contagious, and how surrounding yourself with people who do hard things can transform your own capacity to grow. Caroline shares her research-backed framework for setting challenging and specific goals, the kind that stretch you beyond your comfort zone and build authentic self-esteem. If you’ve ever felt stuck chasing easy wins or wondered why your goals don’t light a fire inside you, this conversation will help you rethink goal setting and commit to what truly matters. Notable Quotes “Most people set no goals or low goals. The happiest people pursue the hardest goals.” — Caroline Miller “Your goals should be just outside your fingertips. That’s when you discover your potential.” — Caroline Miller “It’s what you do in the dark that people see in the light.” — Jay Abbasi About Our Guest Caroline Miller, MAPP is an internationally acclaimed speaker, author, and coach, recognized as a trailblazer in the field of positive psychology and goal setting. With nine published books, including Creating Your Best Life and Getting Grit, she has inspired audiences worldwide to pursue authentic goals, build resilience, and cultivate the grit required to achieve them. Caroline’s work blends cutting-edge science with her own extraordinary journey of recovery, making her one of the most sought-after voices on motivation and success. Resources and Links Caroline Miller Website – https://www.carolinemiller.com/ LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/carolineadamsmiller/ YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/user/camcoaching Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/Caroline.Adams.Miller.MAPP Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/carolineadamsmiller/ X – https://x.com/carolinemcoach Jay Abbasi Website – https://jayabbasi.me/ LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayabbasi/ Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/jayabbasi_/ Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/thejayabbasi/ YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/@jayabbasipodcast Join Us Next Time On Friday, Jay will walk you through how to commit to the unglamorous process. He’ll break down how to prime your environment, anticipate setbacks, and build accountability structures that keep you moving toward your most important goals. If you’ve struggled to stay consistent or fallen victim to shiny-object syndrome, this episode will give you practical strategies to follow through. Until then, stay gritty, stay focused, and keep aiming just beyond your fingertips.
What this episode covers
Meet Theo. He rolls out of bed, head pounding from too many drinks with old friends, scrolling through Slack messages while convincing himself he’ll figure things out next weekend. For years, he’s coasted as a sales executive, hitting quotas but feeling stuck, stuck in the same habits, the same crowd, and the same cycle of instant gratification. Theo has no real goals beyond surviving the week. He listens to podcasts, scribbles half-baked ideas on bar napkins, and dreams of doing something bigger. But with no structure, no accountability, and no one pushing him to rise higher, his life feels full but not fulfilling. In this episode, Jay is joined by Caroline Miller, pioneering positive psychology expert, bestselling author, and one of the world’s leading voices on grit and goal setting. With 40 years of recovery, nine books, and decades of coaching leaders, Caroline has a powerful perspective on why traditional SMART goals often fail and what actually drives lasting success. Together, they explore the pitfalls of “realistic” goals, why behavior is contagious, and how surrounding yourself with people who do hard things can transform your own capacity to grow. Caroline shares her research-backed framework for setting challenging and specific goals, the kind that stretch you beyond your comfort zone and build authentic self-esteem. If you’ve ever felt stuck chasing easy wins or wondered why your goals don’t light a fire inside you, this conversation will help you rethink goal setting and commit to what truly matters. Notable Quotes “Most people set no goals or low goals. The happiest people pursue the hardest goals.” — Caroline Miller “Your goals should be just outside your fingertips. That’s when you discover your potential.” — Caroline Miller “It’s what you do in the dark that people see in the light.” — Jay Abbasi About Our Guest Caroline Miller, MAPP is an internationally acclaimed speaker, author, and coach, recognized as a trailblazer in the field of positive psychology and goal setting. With nine published books, including Creating Your Best Life and Getting Grit, she has inspired audiences worldwide to pursue authentic goals, build resilience, and cultivate the grit required to achieve them. Caroline’s work blends cutting-edge science with her own extraordinary journey of recovery, making her one of the most sought-after voices on motivation and success. Resources and Links Caroline Miller Website – https://www.carolinemiller.com/ LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/carolineadamsmiller/ YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/user/camcoaching Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/Caroline.Adams.Miller.MAPP Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/carolineadamsmiller/ X – https://x.com/carolinemcoach Jay Abbasi Website – https://jayabbasi.me/ LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayabbasi/ Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/jayabbasi_/ Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/thejayabbasi/ YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/@jayabbasipodcast Join Us Next Time On Friday, Jay will walk you through how to commit to the unglamorous process. He’ll break down how to prime your environment, anticipate setbacks, and build accountability structures that keep you moving toward your most important goals. If you’ve struggled to stay consistent or fallen victim to shiny-object syndrome, this episode will give you practical strategies to follow through. Until then, stay gritty, stay focused, and keep aiming just beyond your fingertips.
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101: Why SMART Goals Don’t Work
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