Real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good, real good. Ladies and gentlemen, hello and welcome to another edition of America's Best Worst Canadian Sports Podcast. That's right, real good show is back out of the game for another week. It is episode 104, an episode that is actually episode 104 this time.
I checked to make sure, no, actually I just remember being embarrassed last week, because I got it wrong. Justin Morris with you once again with me as always is. Well, I regret to inform you, Stefan Heck was hit by a bus. Oh, that's, you shouldn't scare your listeners like that.
Yeah, yeah, he's dead. He died. Yeah, he died. That's so upsetting.
It's okay. Can you imagine if that was my... That's so upsetting. Oh, no.
He died. I'm John Collin. And with us. Stefan is not with us today.
He's not with us today. He's a liar in a cheat. He's very busy with important Hollywood business. No, he's not.
His girlfriend is visiting him this weekend, so we couldn't record him the weekend like we normally do. So we said, okay, let's record on Thursday and then Stefan fucking... He had the right series Bible. Yeah, series Bible.
Yeah, series Bible. And what even is that? In this house, we only believe in one Bible. Yeah, the series Quran.
That's what I believe in. Fuck that bullshit. But we are joined by the hilarious Kyle Bottom. Kyle, thank you for being here.
Thank you, Tosty Boys. It is a hot one. It is hot in this bitch. Like seven inches from the midday sun, really.
Oh, yeah, we're recording too early. The nightfall has not come. It is a post-apocalyptic outside. It's hazy.
It's smoggy. It's hot. And we're sweating a lot. Yeah, and we are officially auditioning new hosts after Stefan tragically passed away.
Exactly. It's the same as when Regis Field and died. Or trying out all those new hosts. Or like when the NXS host...
Is he dead? No. He just left the show. He left Regis.
I don't know why I said the lead singer of NXS was the host of the band. Yeah. But I'm assuming that that's how Stefan died also. It was by auto-orotic disfixation.
Absolutely. So yeah, this is like our rock star. We're just auditioning new. Wasn't his just erotic as fixation not auto-orotic?
For some reason I feel like someone else choked him to death. Oh. I could be wrong. I'm probably wrong.
Because I feel like if someone else was there they could have stopped. Yeah, yeah, that's probably so true actually. But anyway, you guys keep talking. It's like Keith Carradine from Kung Fu died the same way.
He did definitely. David Carradine. Oh, really? Yeah.
Okay. The Kung Fu guy. There's two of them. Yes, that's right.
David Carradine's though. One of them wasn't Kill Bill and the other one is dead. No, it's the same guy. Oh, really?
David Carradine. I'll be honest guys. I don't care at the end of this. Oh, shit.
I'm up. Toasty boy with a burner. That's right. Toasty boys are on fire.
Okay. Yeah. What is, I'm sorry. I'm trying to read this.
Oh, yeah. Okay. David Carradine. Yeah.
It was auto-orotic as fixation here. That's the only way to do it. Yeah. Yeah.
Have you done? No, no, no. But like you're like, Hey, do you want to come over and choke me? No.
Just use a belt. Yeah. Yeah. That's what he did.
It was a snake skin belt. Yeah. Someone knows that. Yeah.
They're like Hutchins. It was in a hotel. Police reported that he was in a kneeling position facing the door. He had used his snake skin belt to tie a knot on the automatic door closure at the top of the door and had strained his head forward into the loop so hard that the buckle had broken.
Jesus. Yeah. Oh, it's a pair. His was a suicide.
He wasn't jerking off. Oh, really? Yeah. Did not have it.
Just says it was a suicide while depressed under the influence of alcohol and other drugs. Oh, well, Bill from Kill Bill, it was. It was definitely. It was trying to jerk.
Definitely. I totally thought it was his brother that died that way. Oh, man. This is a tragic.
Was it entourage where they had the guys from Ottawa? It was when Vincent, they go to like a mansion. It's very jarring because the show is entourage. So you're not expecting there.
And I think it's Vince or one of the characters goes into a room and they open the door and then when they swing the door shut, a guy is just on the back of the door. I think it was entourage. I'm going to double check. A lot of research you're having to do right now.
Speaking of entourage though, I recently discovered that Bruno Kirby from like the City Slickers movies. He's the guy who's not Billy Crystal or Daniel Stern. His last film role before he died was playing a movie executive on the episode of entourage where Dom steals a Shrek doll. Do you remember that one?
No. They go to like the producer of Shrek's house and he's got like a doll and the like Italian guy who just got out of jail who joins their group for like three episodes. He stole a doll from Bruno Kirby and that was his last role before he died of cancer. So what a way to go out.
I fucked up. It was California. Okay. Yes.
That's not where there was the. Yeah. Yeah. That's more and more correct.
Yeah. Yeah. I want to rewatch entourage. Really?
Yeah. Why not? Just so you can have a clear view of how bad it actually was. Yeah.
Cause like I watched it as like a 20 year old douchebag. Yeah. Now is a 32 year old douchebag. I feel like maybe I've progressed beyond it.
We can only hope. My douchey tastes have evolved. I never saw the film. I saw the film and it was horrible.
You did see the movie. Oh yeah. Of course. Yeah.
Well, because here. Okay. Here's the thing about the film. It just ends.
Like it has the weirdest ending of a film. Like there's no there's no day new mall. There's no there's not even really a climax. It was just like it was almost like they ran out of money, which I'm sure did not happen because they had a lot.
But it was like it was just like we're doing the movie and oh. Now it's just over. There's no none of the conflicts were solved. Nothing happened.
It was just like, okay. I guess we're done here. Well, that's why it was fucked up, man. Anthony Scaramucci says it will go down in history as a just cult classic.
The entourage. Yeah. It was one of the tweets that was making the rounds after he got the cult. The White House job.
How do you call like a like extremely popular show cult class? It is not like I think I had the movie. Yeah. You're talking about the movie.
I mean, I'm just assuming the movie made quite a bit of money too. Yeah. Wow. I think like cult status is just, you know, something that is beloved more than you would think maybe.
Yeah. More than it deserves. Okay. Yeah.
That's fair. It made 49.3 million. That seems like too much. Yeah.
It says the budget. Well, the budget was 39 million and the it made 49.3 million. That's in the US. A real cult classic of like TV to film adaptations is probably DuckTales, Legend of the Lost Lamp.
Oh, that is a good movie movie. No, it did actually make it made 49.3 million worldwide. They ended up they ended up the budget was 30 million was that they had projected 39 but made it for 30. That's what I'm saying.
The last nine million was the like 10 minutes they just decided not to have at the end. Yeah. That's why. Yeah.
That's why. I'm just like leaving it open ended for another one. Montourage to I mean, Sex and the City got two movies on to Raj. That would for sure be the name of it though.
Yeah. Definitely. Definitely. And then the third one would be called like three on to rock three.
But these would be three to rock three. Yeah. You're right. You're totally right.
But speaking of like, I mean, these are all movies that you would buy tickets to. That is true. You would buy tickets to these movies. I mean, I didn't know I never would really.
But if you had to, yeah, the main problem, the reason that I didn't go see the entourage film in theaters is that the tickets were just too expensive. Absolutely. You know how movie tickets are. Yeah.
And there's a better way. There has to be a better way. There's definitely a better way. Yeah.
Do you say? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Do I take it?
Absolutely. Probably not to movies, but sports and concerts at the very least. Absolutely. Yeah.
Buying tickets to sports and concerts can be complicated, but there actually is a better, simpler way to buy John. And it's with Seeky. Is there? Did you know this?
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In fact, Stefan used the app just last week to buy those tickets to the Dodgers game that he got to fucked up on Edibles to stick around to the very end. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Seeky is designed to make your ticket buying an experience easier than ever.
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That's promo code real good for $20 off your first Seeky purchase. Oh, yeah. That was like perfect timing. Yeah.
Right to the end there. Yeah. I always thought the theme was done by Jane's addiction. Yeah, it is.
Okay. That's what I thought. But then when I looked it up, it didn't seem to be. It just says entourage.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. By the entourage I was banned. Which I mean, I guess Jane's addiction could be the entourage. No, that was off of their 2004 album strays.
And the track is called Superhero. Yeah, yeah, it is. Yeah, but I'm just saying they could be the entourage. That's how it's been.
Yeah, that's what you watch entourage. No, I don't watch most shows. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah.
If they had like a Vinnie Chase talk show, yeah, like Dave Navarro is definitely his band leader. He's the band leader for sure. Yeah, Diamond Dave Navarro. That's right.
Oh, yeah. It is catchy. I mean, I'll give you that. Yeah, it just gets lost.
I'm going to rewatch it. I mean, it'd be fun to do an entourage podcast. Yeah, pod garage. I knew you were going to say pod garage.
How could you not? Right? Yeah. I mean, that would make it for podcasts for me.
I don't need another podcast. Yeah, for if three podcasts. Well, I'm going to have a third. So I have that sports related.
Well, no, it's not. No, it's not. I have the white caps one with Chris James, pod caps. And then me and Kevin are starting one about new metal called the POD gas.
Oh, nice. You never liked a guest. I feel like you're a new metal you were a new metal guy. I don't like music either.
Oh, at all. No, what do you like video games? That's about it. And your dog and gifts.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're a big gift guy. I love me some gas. We got to thank some donors.
We do. We do. Oh, yeah. And it's gonna be the title of the episode episode 104.
Oh, yeah. Unfortunately, I can't put the theme right now, but I'll drop it in post about I would have really liked it. So it's quite a jam. It's a catchy theme.
Thank you for donating to the show to the show. You work hard for your money that we know that we know segments where we read out all your names, all your names. If we say it wrong, your parents are to blame. We just have to thank one donor, Duncan.
I don't know. He up-displedged from $666 to $15 because he wants that sweet, sweet, sweet, toilet shirt. That's absolutely right. And we're all too happy to provide.
So congratulations, Duncan. Duncan, it's on the way. You plowed through the entire series in like three and a half months. Well, plain Horizon Zero Dawn.
We don't recommend that. We had a tweet today where someone said that they've listened to 57 episodes of the show in the last month. And he said it broke his brain. I was like, well, that's not too a day.
Yeah, basically, because you, yeah, because the episodes are an hour and a half. So, I guess if you're listening at work, or if you have like a hell of a commute, yeah, but so say you're listening at work. So you reasonably listen for like six hours a day so you could kill four episodes in a day. So, and then you work like this, yeah, like 20 days a month.
So you could do 80. So 57 is really kind of not kind of average. Yeah, really underperforming. Yeah, really underperforming.
Yeah, well, you step it up whatever your name is. I should shut them out because it was hilarious to say that they're to see that their brain was broken. Now, Kyle, in the past on this program, we have discussed esports and we came to the definitive conclusion that they are not actually real sports. Okay, but the sports moniker does not belong in that title.
But I don't know what else you would call it really. So it's like some sub-tier activity like like poker or curling. Yeah, I mean, it's okay. Wow.
Comes on my show in my kitchen in my own kitchen and says that about my beloved sport. I don't know what you would call it then because yeah, it does like draw a pretty significant audience. Crazy audience that might actually feel like a legit arena. Oh, yeah, they feel huge arenas.
Yeah. But okay, so what else isn't a sport then? Like, okay, well, curling is definitely a sport. I know, I know.
But like, but so poker not sport. I would say poker is not a sport. I think like anything where you can sit in a specialized chair, you know, like poker or a league of left words. Wheelchair basketball.
Yeah, exactly. Definitely not a sport. No, that's hard as hell. I know I know, but I'm just like, have you ever done it?
Oh man, I mean, I'm already shitty at basketball and I'm being sitting in a chair. I don't think driving like any NASCAR or F1, like that's a sport. The car is doing all the work. No, it's so demanding physically.
Did you ever see? Think about how toasty we are right now. That's true. So there's this really, um, this is really realistic driving simulator and the name of it.
No, I'm really realistic traffic center. It was called, but they, um, they took the best like online driver in the world and they put him in like a Formula One car and let him do a couple laps. And like after a second lap, he can be vomited everywhere because like he was hitting all the corners like really well, but what he didn't realize was what it puts your body through, right? Like the horse of like, you know, getting pulled down into the car while you're, uh, I don't know, I don't know.
Gravitational pull on corners and stuff, which you can feel sometimes if you just come over to the Lionsgate bridge at to high up speed, basically. I, uh, I've driven an ass car. I took my, I got my dad a Christmas press. We've talked about this before.
We drove an ass car and, um, yeah, it's, uh, it's alarming. Like I didn't drive it as fast. So what we did first was we did a warm up lap with a pro driver. Yeah.
And, uh, that was frightening. And then I went out on my own and I did, okay, I drove pretty fast, not as fast as him, but even that, I mean, we were going at slow speeds, short track, and it was like aggressive. Like where to the point where I was like, okay, definitely like an actual driver. That's extremely difficult.
But I think like the argument that often gets made as to why it is a sport is that like it is so hot and dehydrating that you can lose a significant amount of like water weight just in one race. Wow. And I guess technically that might apply to esports also, because people just play for three days straight and then die without nourishing themselves. Here's an idea.
Combine UFC and NASCAR. So then when the UFC fighters have to cut weight, they just drive a NASCAR. So they like the race plus the fight results count together and it's just like everybody wins. I don't think UFC is a sport.
You don't think so? I think it's like attempted murder. Really? Yeah.
Oh man. I disagree with that. I think combat sports are definitely a sport. I actually I just hate them.
I'm so disgusting. Really? Like just like visually or like like the injuries you find discussing or like the injuries and like how the ref has to stop someone from punching someone who's unconscious. Right.
Like that just gets me. Once I saw a guy in an arm bar, I had his arm break in half. Yeah, that's gross. That was when I stopped watching.
And I just thought it was like gross violence. That's fair. It is very violent. I'm not a violent person.
I do enjoy watching it, but there is a line for me definitely like when John Jones's toe came out of the skin and then he like saw it and then that was crazy. So he was fighting Alexander Gusis in and it got caught in the in the gap between the cage and the mat and then it came out and he didn't even know. So he's like doing this. Then they showed it on the reviewer.
And I wasn't I was like it was like John watches the thing like I was a girl. That's a segment on the show because I get very Swedish. So I like was walking it out. And so Joe Rogan's interviewing John Jones and he's totally fine.
He's like, Oh, how was it? You know, buddy? He's like, Oh, yeah, I was, you know, whatever good I did this and that whatever. And then Joe's like, Yeah, I mean, you fought so well considering you're told like that's pretty crazy.
And Jones is like, Oh yeah, like it hurts a little bit. And he's like, it's a pretty bad. And then Jones looks down and sees that it's like, and he immediately is like, Oh, and you can see you just go to super and they had to get him a stool and he had to like sit down on this. But he was totally fine until he saw his own phone.
I made the exact same reference last week, but it's like, why Lick I owe you running off? Yes, you don't fall until you look down. Yeah, that's true. So yeah, but I would say it's a sport.
I know this one. I just wanted to comment on how gross it is it is growth. It is kind of gross. I'll say that for sure.
I just like the idea that like back in 1998 ish. I was I was like playing Pokemon on my original Game Boy and just seen, you know, these battles inside of a Rorian Stadium, people just going crazy in the game and thinking like, Oh, this seems like a bit much. I don't know. I doubt that this is going to happen.
And then 20 years later, here we are. It basically it basically is the exact thing. I like to call UFC Pokemon. No, no, no, I'm talking about esports.
Oh, I got it. I like that he's playing Pokemon where you catch and train monsters and he gets to the arena battle. It's like when these crowd sizes are a bit unreal. That was the part that got it.
Yeah. Absolutely. Not that not that a 300 pound monster can fit into a tennis ball. Yeah, that's true.
But what is your game of choice? For as far as esports go, my favorite is League of Legends. But I'll play just about anything. I'm a huge Blizzard fan boy.
So I'll play like, like Hearthstone. I'll play Diablo. I'll play Overwatch. Those are one of the other ones right now.
So Stefan is just extremely angry that he's not here to get out about it. Yeah. Well, because we were chatting on Twitter when we were talking about the show, when you said you're like, Oh, you know, I don't know anything about conventional sports, but I'd love to come on the show and talk esports. And I said it was kind of a perfect fit because in the summertime, shit, all is happening sports wise.
It's the perfect kind of like to have you on because I know nothing about esports and our listeners are just fucking nerds. Oh, yeah. And I was like, Oh, this would be perfect. Have kylons.
So I'll be the pleb. Do you know anything? Not really. Like, I don't like it seems to me like it has all the appeal of like watching your older brother play video game and he refuses to let you play basically.
Well, the thing is that it's at such a higher level than when you play on your own. So it feels like when I go watch a hockey game, like an NHL game, I'm like, Holy shit, there's so much better at hockey than me. Well, yeah. And it's like, it's like when you go to watch a hockey game or a baseball game and somebody makes a mistake and you're like, Oh, they're not supposed to do that.
Right? Right. It's normal to make mistakes when an amateur plays a game, but any sports just like in regular sports, you're there's not supposed to be any errors. You're supposed to do everything perfectly the entire game.
Right. So and that coupled with the fact that you know, these people play on organized teams with coaching staff, they have like strategies that go beyond what they as individuals are doing within the game. Like it definitely, you definitely see a higher level of play for sure. Okay.
So in League of Legends, what is it? So what is like a top down like dungeon crawler from what I can. So have you ever played like Starcraft or Command and Conquer? I know what those are.
So those are top down like real-time strategy games. And that's where you control like an army of people. Yes. Now League of Legends is different because you only control one character.
Yeah. Each person is one person and you play on a team of five. Yes. That I know.
Five versus five. It all came from it's kind of like capture the flag, right? You're trying to like, uh, how the game works is how do you win? What do you do?
You have to destroy your opponent's base. So the bases are in two corners of the map, one in the bottom left corner and one in the top right corner. Okay. And there's three like roads that lead from one base to the next.
Yeah. And you have to get into your opponent's base and destroy the base. But it's, it takes time. It's fairly difficult because along the road, like so on your side of the map, your lanes, your roads have towers.
They have turrets set up that will shoot anything that walks up. Okay. So you can't just like, you can't just like walk into your opponent's base at the start of the game. Right.
Essentially meet, um, at the intersection of the road where it's like their pathway meets your pathway. And how the game works is at a minute and 30 seconds into the game, like neutral monsters spawn in your base and start walking towards the enemy base. Okay. And so if nobody interferes with them, those two little packs of neutral monsters will just meet in the very middle of the, of the lane.
They'll attack each other, they'll kill each other, and then 30 seconds later, the next wave spawns. Okay. So that happens all game long. And you have to try to get through the monsters or you want to kill the monster.
You want to secure the last hit on the monsters. So you only need to get the killing blow. But if you miss the killing blow, you don't get anything other than experience for being nearby. That's another thing is like, your character starts at level one levels all the way up to level 18.
During each game, every game you start at level one gotcha. Yeah, it's like life. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
And every game, I want to interrupt because I just, there's one question I got asked. Do you think it would fuck people up if the map was switched and it was bottom right and top left? Oh, yeah. I would like, if they somehow like mirrored it and it would fuck people's brains.
The thing with this thing, because I was going to say you're saying the sport is so specialized, their muscle memory must be geared towards diagonally going that way. So if you tried to flip it the other way, so idea for you, because you've told me that you're not that great, compared to the pro guys, you should start a mirror league and just get, but get really good at it for like two years before you even introduce it. Yeah. Hey, just play on a private server.
Yeah, exactly. Be like, Hey, League of Legends fucking Oh, yeah, you think you're so good, pussy fucking play the mirror map over here with me. And you're like, even your character, like your online username is like mirror legend or something like that. And then you're just like automatically become the best.
And then all these guys are like, Whoa, this is a new game in Kyle Bond. It's like, it's like the CFL version of football, you know, like it's mostly the same, but a couple alterations really fuck you up. Exactly. I was thinking it'd be like an episode of Yu-Gi-Oh, like I show up and be like, I challenge you in the mirror realm.
Throw a smoke bomb down. Yeah, that would be that would be dope as hell. Especially if you did it in life, follow me through this portal if you dare. Exactly.
You show up at an arena event with a smoke bomb. Yep, obviously wearing a cape. Yeah. Like, Oh, look at all these guys.
I think they're special. Follow me into the mirror realm. There's probably gonna like, I sports terrorist Kyle bottom. Yeah, exactly.
My legends event. My hope is that people who know League of Law are listening to this and hate everything I'm saying. Oh, yeah. Go.
This is disgusting. Like, like I'm basically being racist right now. Yeah. Like mirroring it.
What is this guy talking about? Because the thing with League of Legends, like games, games differ. A lot of games have multiple levels that you can play competitively. League of Legends only has one map that is played competitively.
The like the standard five versus five map is the only thing that gets played. That's so crazy. There's no different like they'll every year they kind of the company that makes it riot. They they'll update the game a little bit.
They'll add some things. They'll take some things out. But yeah, the map always stays exactly the same. So interesting.
So how do you not just master the game then? It's so hard. Like, there's 130 different characters you can pick. So each game, like it takes so long to actually get enough experience because not only do you have to if you want to master a character, not only do you have to master like playing that character, get the master playing it against all of the viable options that people could pick against it.
Right. So that's what makes the games different and intriguing to watch. Oh yeah. Because there's like stylistic clashes.
Yeah. Because otherwise it seems kind of plain and repetitive. Yeah. That's what I'm thinking.
Yeah. Yeah. Totally. So like every game starts with like a pick and ban phase.
So before anyone is allowed to pick a character, each team gets to ban three characters. Okay. And then so would you ban guys that you know a guy on the other team is unbelievable with that character? Of course.
That's the whole either if you know that the team has a character they're specifically really good on than that. Or if something is just because the meta game changes every you know like every couple months, every four months there's like a drastic shift in like which characters are the most OP. Okay. And so you ban out the overpowered champions.
Gotcha. Yeah. And try and limit that pool to a smaller puzzle. Gotcha.
Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, they do three bands each and then the team that gets first pick picks one character. Is that like a big deal when you're watching it?
Like is that because like we love like the draft like NHL draft is so exciting for us. Like we were like, you know, that's it. That's only once a year. But like is that like a big deal as a fan?
Like the opening coin flip. Oh no, they like they're like we ban the dwarf. Well, you don't actually get to hear the teams because they're like they're in closed communication during pick and ban. I gotcha.
But there's like like sports casters who are talking about the picks and they're actually my least favorite part of the whole broadcast. I hate most of the broadcast. Oh really? Except for like one or two.
And if you're listening, you know who you are. Yeah, because I feel like we watched a clip and it was like English dudes commentating on it like it was soccer. Like, oh, he cuts into the river and he's fucked with the monster. Yeah, that's he's fucked with the monster is a very common thing.
I'm going off a very giving me a very limited scope here. Yeah, yeah. So that that the pick and ban is definitely important. It's like, yeah, because it can kind of shape the whole game.
Is there ever a time or someone picks someone and it's like totally like off the board? Like people are like, no ways he picking that. Oh, yeah, definitely. Because it's like a secret.
Like they got really good at this one guy, but they didn't tell anyone. Yeah. Yeah. So a great example of this is an example.
So two of the best teams in North America are Cloud9 and Team Solo Mid or TSM. Okay, so TSM was like the dominant team of North America since forever. Okay, they've been around since day one. And then right around season three or season four, Cloud9 showed up and they were like these really promising rookies.
Okay. And they beat TSM in the final. And what happened was the owner of TSM, who was also the, they're like one of their star players, he stepped down and they brought in like an import player from Europe, this like real hot shot kid. Sure.
There are a cap on how many imports you can have. There is. There is. The best part of that was that you guys couldn't see it, but Kyle did a little flip with his hand.
He was like, there is. And he like flipped his hand down at the same time. That was amazing. Well, because here's the thing with League of Legends is that if you could import all of your players, then almost every team that plays professionally would be Korean, like entirely Korean, because Koreans invented esports like back in the 90s with Starcraft, like it's been on television forever.
So their gaming culture is just like way out of ours. So you can only have two important. So they always win the world. The Korean teams?
Yeah, almost every year. Yeah. But it's really hard to have it added to the Olympics. Oh, God.
Yeah. They want it. Well, the Olympics are in Pyeongchang in 2018. So they're probably trained in real art.
That's not a thing. Is it? You mean, Pyongyang? Or sorry, Pyongyang.
Yeah. I mean North Korea. They're not in South Korea. They're in South Korea.
Pyongyang, whatever. Yeah. Right. Sorry.
Sorry to our Korean listeners. Yeah. We have one. Oh, but yeah, you can have two imported players.
The other ones have to be like living in, you know, they're native to that region. Gotcha. Yeah. So TSM brings in this like new like superstar rookie and from Korea, from Europe.
Oh, Europe. He was like, he was the most promising player in Europe in the soul and over to America. First of all. Yeah.
Yeah. Definitely. So they have this new star player coming in. Yeah.
First name of the season is five nine versus TSM. He tears his ACL. More of a football. The worst thing that can happen in Eastwards is wrist injury.
Right. Carpal tunnel. Yeah. Yeah.
A leg injury is probably good. Actually, it's probably fine. You're playing more. You're just stuck in your chair forever.
Yeah. So these teams are facing off. The Cloud Nine, the reigning champions TSM team that has just made a huge roster change, bringing like a star rookie player. Yeah.
And the so this star rookie plays the middle lane. And the middle lane is the shortest lane on the map because it just goes straight diagonally across. Okay. The other lanes follow the borders.
So they go up and across or down and across. So mid lane is usually dominated by like high damage, like spell caster characters or like assassins characters that like jump in and like ninja you. Sure. So everyone's expecting this like really intense like high damage, high action matchup.
And the mid laner for Cloud Nine shows a character who is a total troll pick like never sees competitive play. Everyone hates them. And any of your listeners who watch League of Legends will know exactly who Timo is. Sure.
But Timo is a hamster with a blow dart. His ultimate move is that and you have to consider that like ultimate moves in League of Legends are like huge crazy explosions. Right. Right.
Timo's ultimate move is that he plants mushrooms that turn invisible. And then if you walk into them, they explode and deal poison damage to you. Okay. Timo, can we just call him Stefan?
Yeah. He calls Stefan Stefan. But hamster with a blow dart. Yeah.
So you have this star rookie player coming in his first match up and his opponent picks like this total troll pick. And you know, I think that Bjergsen, the star rookie player, I think he got a couple of kills on Timo, but it didn't matter because they were so unprepared for that pick that Timo just took over the game in the late game. Because what he can do is just plant mushrooms all around the important parts of the map. And then yeah, you just walk into them and take like, you know, a quarter of your your.
So this is the rookie that did it or it was against. Okay. Yeah, because they were mapped to fuck with them. Yeah, to fuck with them because you know, it's so much hype around him.
Right. Yeah. So he got beat by Timo and then was the whole team like, yo, fuck you like, oh, you got beat by Timo, you fuck a bitch. Like, does that I'm sure people on Reddit were like making fun of him.
He got over it. He's the total piece. Yeah, it doesn't matter. Like they make he makes millions.
How much do they make? I think it's like six figures. Like over like 100,000. So so in sports, like most of the people who are on like the coaching staff of the hockey team or a football team are like former players themselves.
Yeah. Who is on the coaching staff of an esports team? It's here's the funny thing is that esports is dominated by like like 17 year olds to like 21 year olds. Right.
And so the coaches are the retired players who are like, so fine. Exactly. And so why would you have to retire? Your, do your reflexes actually slow that badly?
Oh, totally. Like it's the thing with loose. So there's no hope for you. Oh, yeah.