11. The N Word: Narcissism & Missing a Self

What if the person you’ve been trying to reach simply doesn’t have the interior capacity to meet you there? In this episode, Mechelle and Monte explore what it means to be “missing a self” — the relational pattern where someone never developed a stable interior foundation and unconsciously pulls others into orbit around their unmet needs. They unpack the difference between empathy and hypervigilance, why this behavior can look narcissistic without being clinical narcissism, and why trying harder is never the answer when someone else is the variable. If you’ve spent too long trying to be enough, this one’s for you.Content warning:This episode discusses emotionally unavailable and narcissistic relationship patterns. If you’re currently in a difficult or potentially harmful relationship, please listen with care and reach out to a trusted support person.Thanks for Sharing PodcastDr RamaniCarol Tuttle Information is not intended as professional advice and is for entertainment only. keywords:missing a self, codependency, hypervigilance vs empathy, narcissistic patterns relationships, self abandonment, emotional unavailability, trying to be enough, differentiation in relationships, relationship healing, Rupture Ever After, narcissism narcissistic relationship missing a self sense of self relational healing codependency gaslighting hypervigilance empath and narcissist nervous system attachment patterns feeling like a burden self-worth trauma-informed family of origin healing relationships relationship patterns rupture and repair Dr. Ramani taking up space