13| The Chemistry Lab Floor is Lava

The floor is lava; go figure. Elections are here, cool kids! Those shifting halls in the high school are hiding a door that has been long lost to this school. Mr Minotaur is leading the charge (safely behind a wall of students) into the catacombs to battle the combat enhanced rat king! Woah, who could have seen the twist the came from the Egg Board of 'Merica? Music for this episode was performed by Jemmy Joe. You can find lots more of his eclectic work at jemmyjoe.bandcamp.com. Thank you to our sponsors, Serfs-to-air missiles and the Cunnilanguish Public Service Announcement. And, of course, thank you to Budweiser. Vice Principal parodied The Rolling Stones' song Wild Horses with his version, Mild Hot Sauce. Lyrics: Hot sauce? No thank you. Salsa? No Gracias. The spiciest thing I put in my mouth has got to be mint floss. Ketchup is straight fire. Mustard cranks the hog. Pickles bathed in vinegar make me sweat like a dog. And mild hot sauce brings my mouth so much pain. Mild, mild hot sauce makes my tears fall like rain. You watched me sweat, eating a tomato. My forehead is so wet. Are you sure it's not a habanero? I ate a deviled egg. My tongue went straight to hell. Paprika knocked me down a peg. Satan scalds me with his spell. And mild hot sauce brings biblical flames. If my tongue is Abel, than Tabasco is Cain. On peppercorns I'm choking. Country gravy leaves my tongue tied. Both my ears are smoking, and my taste buds are fried. Frank's Red Hot can suck it. Sriracha, go die. I would buy Sweet Baby Ray's, but that stuff makes me cry. And mild hot sauce brings out the whips and chain. Mild, mild hot sauce leaves me cleaning up stains. Mild hot sauce—all aboard the pain train. Mild, mild hot sauce—the last stop is my taint. Please share this with anyone that you think may enjoy it. I don't know where to find my audience! :|