13. Writing, Ritual and Radical Self-Compassion with Tanja Pajevic

In this soul-stirring episode, memoirist and book coach Tanja Pajevic joins Hannah for a rich and tender conversation about grief, healing, intergenerational trauma, and the power of writing (and dancing!) through life’s hardest moments.Tanja shares the profound impact of losing both her parents—her father in her twenties and her mother decades later—and how each loss shaped her identity, values, and creative voice. From estrangement and depression to parenting young children while grieving, Tanja shares about her own healing path and how she’s now helping others tell their stories too.Whether you're navigating grief yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode is an invitation to let your experience be messy, non-linear, and deeply human—and to find your own creative language for moving through it.What You’ll Learn in This Episode:* How grief in her twenties “blew up” Tanja’s life—and eventually became a gift* Why she approached her mother’s death with more intention and compassion* How writing and dance became essential tools in her grief journey* The role of intergenerational trauma in shaping our identities and emotions* Why safe, creative containers like writing groups, movement, and ritual matter so much in grief* How to begin writing your story (even if you don’t call yourself a writer)Key Quotes:“I wanted to learn how to grieve consciously. And I just don’t think we’re taught that.”“There are very few places in life where you can scream, cry, laugh—and be fully accepted.”“It’s okay to hold grief and joy at the same time. That’s part of being human.”About Tanja Pajevic:Tanja is the author of The Secret Life of Grief, a powerful memoir about navigating the loss of her mother. She’s also a memoir book coach who supports others—especially those working with vulnerable material—to find their voice and share their stories with courage and care. Her work draws on her Serbian heritage, lived experience, and a deep belief in the healing power of writing.Connect with Tanja: 🌐 Website and work with Tanja: https://www.tanjapajevic.com 📚 The Secret Life of Grief – available wherever books are sold. Audiobook released very soon! 📩 Download Tanja’s free Story Starter Kit at her website This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit rewildyouhq.substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wildheartnz.substack.com