Local news is in decline across Canada, and this is bad news for all of us, with less local news, noise, rumors, and misinformation filled the void, and it gets harder to separate truths from fiction. That's why CBC News is putting more journalists in more places across Canada, reporting on the ground from where you live, telling the stories that matter to all of us, because local news is big news. Choose news, not noise. CBC News.
Local news is a very important thing to do with the fact that you live in a meaningful life. And then I simply read their content to you for free, like a big free audiobook. If you like the show, please share it with friends and family, in person or on social, and tag me if you do that on social, because sometimes I'll send a book to someone who shared it with a bunch of people, and with that, let's get right to it and start optimizing your life. Our world is ruled by love, by Ilana Miller of Zenpsychiatry.com.
Two and a half years ago, I was sitting in the small waiting area outside the trauma bay of the Los Angeles County ER. My boyfriend had just been in a motorcycle accident, and I was there by myself, staring in a half-days off into space, barely holding it together as I agonized over what was happening as doctors and nurses rushed around his hospital bed. An older man saw me there and sat down next to me. He said something along the lines of, hey, you doing okay?
He tried with me for a few minutes. It turns out his son had just been in a motorcycle accident too, and had been airlifted to the emergency room. He asked me about my boyfriend and told me a bit about his son. To be honest, my mind was a million miles away during this conversation, and I don't even really remember the details of what was said.
It felt like anywhere that came out of my mouth would devolve into tears, so I didn't say too much. When he looked at me concerned and asked if I would like to go get dinner with him and his other son, my treaty insisted, I brushed the invitation away. I don't think I should leave, I said, you know, in case the doctors have some news. I thought about that moment about a million times.
I was too preoccupied to show any appreciation at the time, but that man, a total stranger whose son was probably in worse condition than my boyfriend, cared about me, and my well-being. He saw I was distraught and went to comfort me. It was dinner time so he offered me food and company. Our world is ruled by love.
Later in the evening, my boyfriend needed a CT and so was wheeled off to the scanner. It was hospital policy that I couldn't go with him, so I asked the nurse about a million questions. Where are you going? How long will it take?
When will you be back? How will I know if something's happened? Off he went, and I found some windowsill in the corner of the hospital, put my head in my hands and started sobbing. I was there maybe 45 minutes when the same nurse came up to me.
I'm not even sure how she found me, and imagine she must have been searching around for a while. She said there was a delay in my boyfriend getting his CT scan and offered that I could come sit with him in the radiology waiting area. She said it's against the rules, but don't worry about that. She said she had been thinking about me.
I just figured to be down here wearing an upset when your boyfriend wants you up there too, so I came down to get you. She said it casually, but the action was driven by compassion. Our world is ruled by love. Later in the night at about 1 AM, my boyfriend was in surgery when I was in the small waiting room on one of the upper floors of the hospital outside the operating rooms.
It was a waiting room I had walked by mindlessly a thousand times as a medical student at Lake County where I did my medical training, and I was the one inside the room instead of walking by. The only other person there was a young Mexican man whose uncle was having lung surgery for cancer. I picked up an old Oprah magazine sitting on one of the side tables, but my eyes couldn't focus on it, so I just held it on my lap. The young man started chatting with me and asked me who I was waiting for.
He seemed to sense that even though I was trying to keep it together, I desperately needed reassurance. He started regaling me with stories of the amazing care his family members and friends I got in LA County, which I found especially in Dearing because I used to work there. These doctors are really good, he insisted. Your boyfriend is going to be fine.
For some reason I asked him if he thought my boyfriend would be able to be discharged the next day. Yeah, I'm sure of it, he said. They're good here. He'll be out of here in no time.
Our world is ruled by love. These are just a few stories from one night, and there are countless more acts of kindness I've experienced. There was a time in a brilliant move. I thought it'd be a good idea to hold my oversized wallet in my tiny shorts pocket as I carried groceries from the market to my car.
Surprise, surprise, the wallet fell out somewhere in the parking lot. I didn't realize my mistake until an hour later and anxiously rushed back to the market, expecting the wallet to be long gone. I went into the store and asked the first employee I came across if anyone had turned in a lost wallet. She went to a drawer and pulled my wallet out.
Is this it? Our world is ruled by love. Even when there is hate, it's not because there's a lack of love, but rather because there are obstacles to love being fully expressed. Sometimes we are afraid that our own needs won't be met.
Sometimes we forget that we are all interconnected, that my joy is your joy, and that my pain is your pain. After all, when you see a beautiful sunset, it's not just your joy, it's ours. When I sit in traffic on the 405, the infamous North South Freeway in Los Angeles, wanting to gouge my eyeballs out, all I have to do is look around at the other drivers to see is not just my pain, but our pain. I've thought so many times about those strangers who reached out to me that day in the hospital and how their kindness still touches me years later, even though I couldn't express it at the time.
So share love, be kind, receive kindness. We're all in this together. Our world is ruled by love. You just listened to the post titled Our World is Ruled by Love by Alana Miller of Zen Psychiatry.com.
I have so many stories like this. I'm sure you do too, so think about those, and I'll definitely be thinking about it next time on the 405 South Freeway just like she was. I've been in traffic there hundreds of times, if not thousands, but I'll do it for today. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll see you tomorrow, where you're optimal life.