Get it right towards your mouth. You're right towards your mouth shut up. I mean it's an honor. Yeah But you need it where your mouth is yeah, not where your eye socket is right I mean unless you got some sort of creepy ocular eye Ventriloquism trick paper doll is gonna talk with her eye during the show Don't make paper doll angry.
She's the only one who's willing to sit in that chair. I want you We're gonna have creepy doing he started whining like a little scary Scary the chat room can be very aggressive towards non-ungers They like paper on girl all non-ungers are usually treated with some sort of abuse that they wouldn't normally expose them so demanding Explain to us what he's doing to that pussy Following show is for mature audiences only listener discretion is advised and if you don't like it, please go fuck yourself What do you feel your sex life is quite lame? Scared that your desires might be strange Come and join the cake a world of play Welcome to the perverted pocket. I was at one of those You would be so pissed hello I'm looking over to my guest a show where you spoil the adventures of the kinky lifestyle sex on perversion recording live from boogie's love lab Where apparently you can eat right before show It's not like me why do you get my status in the fucking discord hello, perfect I'm Kathy.
I'm boogie. I am the uncle creepy. I told you why I I just more official with the This is amazing. This is it show 151.
This is I literally I got nothing Kathy Well, we got something a little earlier in the kitchen. Yeah, you guys are all tying it on lushing it out He brought 151 proof We're running that's great. Yeah, we had good time everyone tied one. Did you tie one on two?
Yes, of course You did little slut you gotta let me know these things, you know Paper ongers back paper ongers back paper onger. You know me now. I do something later. I don't do the other thing I don't know at least like that microphone's not in your eye socket anymore, you know you got your method I got mine you get what you pay for I haven't gotten my check yet.
Yeah, neither of we I don't know anybody find hunger. Yeah, it's like a toll He's yeah, but if he shows up in the chat room We're gonna give me my I think it was work and he's just been really bogged down with work and stomach Yeah, but that's a good we don't want a giant ogre with stomach problems in the lab. We do not want I'm just like no No, no, no, I understand you you you go ahead and just stay home stay home with those But it's an amazing day and as was foretold Last week by the ancient body as was for told All of the things that we're going to transpire in the last week that we talked about did they have a d transpire and they have indeed and In fact, you did take her MCAT exam, which is you need to a good score to qualify for a good medical school And and she went in and this was a year and a half I mean, you know you guys have prepared my guess listeners They've been in the journey with her we talked about it a million times and and she went in and she was nervous and terrified We did the whole guy just endless coach pep talk okay, but we're not gonna make What's the most important thing question right for a minute? Okay, okay, what are you?
Do not do that I've been doing that for a year and a half. What are you talking about exactly what I know? So she she went I brought her I brought her down there like 637 in the morning She just went in and and she did it and I was just I was real proud I was really I was really excited for her and of course the nervousness or whatever and she calls me immediately after because I mean It's it's like trying to go in the White House in that thing I mean, they know phones know nothing fingerprints you sign out to go pee They don't want anyone cheating on this exam because people used to cheat a lot and have other people take the MCAT So they could get in med school. Oh So so she went in and when she came out she called me right after and of course the reading section as she thought kicked her ass But the other sections all the physics and psychs and biochem and chems and blood all that shit She felt really really strong.
So based on all the other scores in the practice test that she should do pretty good And you got to wait of course. There's no need to wait. You gotta wait like 30 days There's no need it's on a computer Wow do the calculations, but it's yeah, it's whatever the bureaucracy or whatever Don't be mad boogie. I hate I do hate this test but but she finished and as a result It's like even scratching for this wave like in a hurricane for so long and then you you ride the wave and then You know so and I kind of knew what was gonna happen Yeah, and and exactly what I you know thought would happen did happen for me And for her she did pretty good.
She's been playing video games I think like 15 hours a day, you know kids like all the ones that we we hid her passwords to the games that she loves and like Literally, she just went like that night and like yeah Yeah, I got it. I'm like, you know what? I mean, she's still doing stuff with applications and writing letters So she spent in a couple hours a day doing stuff and the rest is just like fuck it Wow, so well, I am when you're that strong of a daddy and you have that strong of a purpose You know because like I said, I money's you know now pick the college that she's gonna go in and all of the things She's you know on her way and now I'm used taking the test and so of course there was there was a big drop Because I'm already going through all the other stuff and it's just like okay Well, what's my purpose? You know, I was kind of leaning maybe a little bit too much on being the daddy for her in this thing to kind of distract me from All of my shit and now that's gone.
So it's like ah shit. I gotta face all this shit now So so it was a little hard for a couple days, but you know you just we make more plans there These these two women in my life definitely have more goals and bigger things that I can you know help with and then in my own Life, so but yeah, it was interesting. I'm just she did it. You don't look driving me.
Well, I'm an actor I that's part of being an entertainer Kathy. Yeah, just pretend. You're making me question our whole relationship Yes, yes everything is an illusion. It is mini me.
Me died. Yes, you too mini me died for an employer They won't say whether and they say they said enough. Yeah, they said enough They didn't want to say well, you know suicide depression is nothing to joke about but we're not gonna tell you how he died So apparently maybe mini me got a little yeah, you got 5150 a couple weeks ago, and then you got who what 5150 crazy? Oh, yeah, yeah, it's not people don't recover from that well But yeah, you know when you get to that time where you're like at that age I'm at that age and you're kind of like I can understand people Robin Williams and all that shit I can understand when people get tired and they're just like I've done it, you know, yeah I might find this is the impression is a motherfucker.
It's a curse 24 hours a day for you know 50 years You're you're like, you know, I'm done Yeah, I told you about my friend that I you know recently caught up with on Facebook and yeah She's she's in that black-ass man. Yeah, just like I've been there I can get out but you know ultimately you're the one that's gonna have to do it Yeah, you have to want it And I kept trying not to give her any answers because I didn't have any that she could I just told her what I went through and how I got out of it right and she's like she used to be so fucking happy and Cheerful and now she's just like I'm sad and that dark and you know, that's part of it being a human and I talk about a little bit Because you know I get to talk about my shrink today So and and we'll talk about that and it's the only tip I'll give is a lot of times when I've been in that dark place I have to leave humans alone Because humans are usually the catalyst for most of the blame of my misery So I leave humans and I try to focus on the things that aren't human about this planet that is actually fucking amazing And I told her that she was very she's very she's very focused on social media because she's a personality Yeah, that's good. She got slammed hard by this recent thing and then she tried to be the better person and got punished for it Yeah, yeah, so she's I told her being away from people is okay, but don't shut them out. Just take your time You know, yeah, no take your time.
I like we got off on this great happy topic. Yeah, he's happy time Let's talk about an asshole. Let's talk about an asshole. What's uber asshole.
That's creative explorer Is he like an uber driver who's an asshole or is he like the pen ultimate? Okay, no, he's uh, I have trouble with them. I never know how to say this I'm a very independent person, so submitting is very difficult I've talked about on the show before and and we've been towing we've been edging a lot and going into the Total dummy mean headspace that he can get into because as we've been playing more we trust each other more And he's always been very careful about venturing into that space without being really very very certain that I'm okay with it And it's not gonna create drama, you know things going wrong is not a big deal So he tells you what to do but like hey, could you do this for me instead of get your fucking ass over there? Oh, no, he'll do stuff like that But really for the past like years, so there's been an element to our play which is there's an element of care So it doesn't matter how how mean he's being or how uber dumly he's being it's just not what Totally just nasal breathing into the mic So basically he's breathing heavy the heavy breathe That's totally you creepy.
Thank you. All right, so but there's always this I don't know how to else to say There's this very nice element of care where he's always alert and he takes me into account even though he's being very very forceful So for some reason a couple of weeks ago that element was completely gone and he turned into just mean I don't give a shit what you want. You are getting no mercy I am fully cognizant of the fact that you are in extreme pain, but I'm not stopping Yes, and it took me by surprise And it just I was like what the fuck is going on and of course I am extremely conflicted because I'm getting turned on even talking about it right now It was very hot and very exciting and I loved it and then hated it at the same time This is the fucking shit that is my head is I Can feel both of the same time and he gets all it makes it worse really is it afterwards? He gets all smug like I know you like that and I just want to find something heavy and throw it at his head So I don't know what prompted him to do this and I'm going to go through this right now where I'm trying We've talked a little bit about it, but I I'm still conflicted and I don't know where it's going and I don't know if he's going to keep it up but I'm surprised that my own reaction and upset at my own reaction and as usual I can't come to any kind of Terms where I'm okay with it because I'm still thinking to myself.
There's something wrong with me This is this is really fucked up. This is not what normal people allow someone else to do to them. You are correct Normal and that's part of the taboo that makes you excited Yeah, I wanted these days I hope to be able to just let this go and be okay with it and just go with it It's like you're on your way though It's upsetting to me that I can't seem to I'm just I'm always doubting myself and asking myself is you know Why are you going down this path and what's what's going on and sure? I don't think there's anything wrong with those questions that you're asking yourself.
I really don't Sounds very normal You're actually supposed to kind of have this evaluation and I don't really think you should get to a point to where your play Your mind is so complacent towards these extreme things that you don't question it It's just whether or not you can quickly assess this is something I actually enjoy and it's exciting But it's not and it's not harming me or making you feel badly about myself going forward Well, I'll keep trying I'm not gonna. Yeah, it's just I thought I'd bring that up and maybe in reverse I will I will ask the listeners for advice if they want to send it to me or they've encountered anything like this Have you been countered a complete dick You have 64 million new messages Dick but he's kind of but it's kind of hot a hot dick you have a hundred please email Kathy at pervertifygazajemail.com Oh your piece of mine please I am so sorry that the mental herpes jingle did not do it for you. I failed. Yeah, you just restart the show I'm turning it.
Yeah, the following show is for a true light We'll just start again, but I still won't know where that is. All right. This is gonna be good. It is this is gonna be good No, I just the way it's the way the title is just makes me think The title is in quotes we try to keep swingers out By I flush it here they come right out This is by oh, I'm gonna butcher this fucking name with it happens to be in French Please you guys come up with another name when you send something because I send out the phonetic You know like I can't so lay at luan which is so sad and soon son of the moon All right, so she writes I've heard the story before swingers aren't welcome at kink nights Why we're all sex-crazed people who just want to fucking the open we don't have the right spirit for kink We're only there for sex There seems to be a stigma against kinksters who enjoy sex and kink together especially swingers as if there is some sort of moral high-ground People wish to hold on to to say we're better than those people and we know what the scene should be I don't want my partner or me to be judged just because we like swinging and kink together We'll never touch someone else without permission We'll never assume we're welcome to do anything with anyone without prior consent and we'll never go to a kink night expecting sex to happen We ask we make sure consent is certain and we give assurances that it can be withdrawn at any time just like anyone should I hope in the future This divide in the community is cleared up because going to an event and being judged for your lifestyle is the exact opposite of what the kink community Supposed to be probably here here probably probably here clap clap clap Absolutely all right Don't kick shit.
Okay, okay There there there is a potential of complete over generalization on this topic because what is a swinger? What is a kinkster? What happens in one kink community does not happen in another kink community? How people view this group in this community and that group in that community and what types of feuds and battles that people have is all different across the board Drama and shit flow like a river all over the place So you're saying anybody who's listening this may not be an issue in your community This may not and but I did a little research.
I went and looked up the person and normally I'm I'm surely as we all know I'm not I'm not really an ageist but the person that that wrote the post by their by their thing is is younger and maybe not Wasn't around for all of the years that there was the great battle between swingers and the BDSM community and and the judgment went both ways the swingers thought that the BDSM people were sick to pray perverts abusers and abusers of women and whatever and the BDSM as she has has said tried to talk down about the open sexuality of the swingers So now fast forward to today And you have a lot of mix now in the area that they're in maybe there's still some of the older people that still have kind of that Battlement alley at threshold I know for a fact that one of the people on the board was very active in the swing community here threshold We have a number of swingers that that are that come to our dungeon events and are also kinky And I think that's really where the main rub for me happens because there is a point where I will absolutely say if you are not into BDSM I don't care what you're into but if you are not into BDSM and you come to a BDSM party and you are trying to get sex Maybe these people are very very responsible, but I'm telling this poster I have multiple experiences of men coming into this dungeon Going through orientation and then coming up to me afterwards and literally saying to my face I don't give a fuck about this BDSM stuff. I just want to get laid I don't want those people in this club when people come in the door and they say who's the most likely which chick is the most likely to Suck my dick by the end of the night that person doesn't get what our mission is about But those people that you're talking about and these are people that claim to come from the swingers community But there are assholes in every community absolutely and I'm sure so that's why I'm saying I don't want to overgeneralize You know, there's bad apples in every group and there's you know people that are against each other in every group But I also want to shed a little light to the poster that when you're running a facility And you have people come in who claim to be something like a swinger or you know a sex part You know someone goes to sex parties or whatever and they come here and you can plainly see that they don't get there Just they're they're just using the system to try to Get something for themselves and not be a part of the community that does dilute the community It'd be the same thing if you went to a swingers party and you're like I don't care about this swinging I just want to come in and and and do something totally opposite of what you're doing Okay, but I have I'm taking her point of view, right? And so she is a swinger she is a respectable swinger. Yes, and if I were her I would not want to be judged by the worse in my community I completely agree with that and I also We don't know where this is a whole other country that we're talking about we don't even know half of what goes on in this country The difference is different communities have the different people and I can totally see that there might be a community out there where the Predominant number of King of swingers are assholes.
That's possible. It's possible. We have communities of Kingsters where we get reports that these people are assholes And they support rape culture and consent violation exactly so if let's just say you're living in this community where this happens to be the case I get that there is a knee jerk reaction and maybe the leaders of that club have decided I'm sorry that this is gonna be a problem for the swingers who are cool and respectful But we're just gonna have to try and notchalantly, you know keep these people out the side door because we don't want them here but there's a difference between that and making a Generalization and just deciding that sex and kink Don't mix and she's actually talking about sex and kinks she's saying in particular That's why I'm saying if you are if you are kinky and a swinger you absolutely belong a threshold You know you what you belong in this community because you are a kinky person and you are you have everyone it doesn't matter What else you do if you're kinky and you want to explore BDSM then be a part of the BDSM community So what I was trying to convey to the people who maybe are like the poster in the in the swinger community is to understand Kind of the other point of views if you've run a club For dozens and dozens of years and in the past you have had a lot of negative experience with people coming from a certain community And identifying is that thing then you may have you and this I think she handled it really well the way she literally confronted the person And just said so you're saying you don't like me right and they're like no no no no It's not you and it's like no you just cast a generalization over all people who carry the swinger So obviously, you know I think that challenge is is how you change minds and hopefully it made that other person think twice right before they just make a A pretty gross generalization like that because we're second we want them out here because we both know somebody You and I know somebody who every chance they get talks about how we don't this isn't a swingers club and we don't support swingers events and that person has a lot of stories of people who identified as swingers coming up and Not being into BDSM at all and trying to just come in here to get laid But this is from a while back No, this is somebody you and I know and they say this every single week and we and we rib this person about this and we say hey I question what this is this is I understand that you're crotchety and old and that you come from the days of wars and there was Very small communities and everything was very fragile and underground But it's not like that we can have open conversations like this person had with the person who had that kind of whatever prejudice And I think it's really healthy, but I also wanted to say To the poster There there might be actual reasons so before we just assume that everyone's just completely, you know Just a prejudice asshole try to think of maybe there is something on the other side That'll help you not be as angry I totally get your point of view You're right because it's vastly different to be an attendee etiquette and to be one of the leaders because if you haven't been in the leadership Position particularly in a nonprofit, but basically any BDSM or kink club You you could have your eyes open because it is a heinous task It is a thankless task and you see the worst of everybody Absolutely you walk in as an attendee and everybody's wonderful and you're happy with everybody But then when you have to police them and you have to sit at the gate and listen to everybody complaining Or you have to be a DM telling the same person the same rule over and over again You start to get bitter and angry so I and I totally understand what you're saying I think that from the rest of her post what I gathered was that there was a general dislike of the mixing of sex and kink Yeah, and that that is something I definitely have a problem with because what if your kink happens to have sexuality Which is like most human beings not unless if you're talking to an old school person somebody Okay, yes if you're talking to an old school person who was trained coming into this lifestyle that you're supposed to separate this Then you were peer pressured out of having an erection while you give somebody a spanking then yes I will say most of the early people in the BDSM community Differentiated between the sexuality and the BDSM But if you go outside of most of us normal human beings before getting in the BDSM community most people do kink As a prelude as a prelude or prelude or prelude sex as a prelude to sex preline a preline a preline Pralings and cream to sex so to take away eroticism and sexuality from kink and any time you tell people they can't do something That's okay for them. You're just a fucking idiot anyway Yeah, so if if kink and sex don't mix for you and I know many people that they just their headspace is not about sexuality But you can't demote You have a blue light you're supposed to click by the way God So I kind of have a perspective from being Before I was an old pressy lady.
I was introduced to kink at a pretty young age of 21 22 by swingers So my first intro to like public kink was a bunch of like a couple of 45 46 year old people and shut up Because I know I'm closer that age now, but wanted me to come to their finger party I my experience with BDSM at the time had been through reading through rautica So I knew about kink but going to a swinger party was pretty shocking even from a from my standpoint where I feel like I've seen a lot I live in a lane whatever but it can definitely put a pretty strong impression on like how depraved things can be and also how kind of normal it is So it's easy to get those judgments like set in your head But I think what happens is it becomes like a self-affilling prophecy to sort of think that all swingers are like that You know like I would say by and large I haven't seen consistent behavior in the swinging community based on that one party I went to when I was 21 or 22 whatever age it was but it's you know It's a thing that comes to mind when I hear people saying oh or swingers my first thought is you gross That's a party where I'm like here you'll do is wanted to grab me and I was like 22 and like it's a strong image to overcome So I think that's that's a thing that if you're gonna do your kink publicly or if you're gonna be kind of a out there about it I mean, I guess think of like the nudist community. I mean, I don't know what kind of image I try not to Yeah, so like you have people like me walking around naked. It is really that. I mean the first time I went to a new beach in Hawaii I was like wow, there's like some really low hanging nuts out there That's definitely more like a nature documentary and it wasn't really sexy fucking pincher crabs hanging out So I would say a little self-awareness goes a long way But if you're walking around thinking ever and hating you for what you're doing It's probably a self-affilling prophecy because you're already projecting that that's what they're thinking about you So I would say try to just not let it get in your head So she's worried that everybody is already predisposed to hate her Maybe just try to like do some positive thinking for yourself and see if that might change the way people react to you Yeah, and in general did we even because we've never really talked much about swingers and what swingers are yeah, man I went to a swingers party after soap and it was was exactly what I expected which was there was probably three women who all had They're already had their guys picked out and then there was probably 50 or so dudes drinking and meandering trying to get their dicks wet And then there was like that is literally that is literally one aspect of a swingers party.
Yeah Well, I mean a lot of the swingers parties from from back in my day Swingers parties were actually more like small communities groups of people which was mostly couples that you had couples that wanted to Explore sexually outside of their relationship and so they would go and you could not go to That event unless you were in a couple. Yeah, no matter how much you paid extra no matter what if you were a single dude You were not walking into this event Though like if you're a single dude if you're a single woman, they're gonna do everything they can to get there Which is why those friends wouldn't leave me alone about it I finally just like alright, I'll go to your dance party But like it was I would say to their credit they were doing a lot more to vet people and personally invite I mean it was literally an email distribution list This is way before social media so you know, you know, you know that changes things a lot so that the gates are a lot Wide open now because it's really easy to find and it's a much brighter term and nobody really spends time and it's the same thing It's like what is BDSM? Well, it's a million different things to a million different people. It's a good way to make money I mean all those guys that came in were paying 60 goddamn dollars 60 dollars And not delayed yeah, I'm under pricing creates a little bit of pressure on saying like little 21 year old paper All who really didn't want to fuck all these dudes so like that is a very weird environment It could be very off-putting so it's fair to feel that way.
I can understand why the trepidation is there though So like it's not she's not wrong. Yeah, I think it's I thought it was pretty cool I enjoyed everything there was I mean there was a lot of consent going on There's a lot of people getting their spotters in and stuff, you know, just in case and it was pretty cool All in all it was pretty cool the creepy dudes not so much but All right, it was good. Hopefully no not too much irreversible damage there and let's move on to my irreversible damage Mental I can totally see that that's your inner voice And we're gonna talk about that today on Shrinking this is and it was so nice my current therapist is so much different than my last therapist So much different. I'm the type there's a couple different like styles of therapy Obviously, there's a bunch of styles of therapy But my therapist calls me and it's like oh my gosh, I'm totally overbooked I can't see you this week, but you know like literally like you want to let's Checking in with me like telling me stuff about them So like I know that you know it was her daughter's birthday and stuff like that and it's very human not a lot of details about their life They're not supposed to give a lot of details It's about you or whatever But it's very nice to know that I'm my my therapist is a human and that they have things going on in their life and and and so forth Where's my last therapist if you asked her?
Do you like the color blue? She would look at you like a fucking computer and just literally be like I understand that you want to know if I like the color blue But we're not going to distract from you and I'm like and we used to fight I mean this one I mean literally she was like just zombie computers Psychologists from hell and it was she was of the nature that you tell the client nothing you be a complete robot because everything that they Say is they're trying to distract from themselves where that's not how I work I want to know that I'm talking to a human if I'm gonna be vulnerable and transparent to someone I want to know that I'm talking to a human because I can go to any motherfucking bus bench and tell my life story and and you know I go to Venice Beach to talk to the Yeah, I'm in a philosopher's So I really enjoy that my current therapist is very noble shit and very personal and and we had a little conversation and And so today's topic of bookies Therapy is no-win self-judgment and the conversation kind of went like this and it's like what I told creepy earlier So I'm going through all this stuff and I'm having you know all of my whatever existential Crysis and and reevaluations of why I'm doing this and blah blah blah and so I'm explaining to my therapist, you know Kind of how it worked when it was worse than the best is she hears what I'm saying today And I'm like you don't understand this is way better. I am way happier. I'm way more self-evaluated I am way more self-actualized.
I actually have a lot of moments of happiness I have amazing people in my life, but I still I'm burdened by some of these things I just haven't figured out how to let go of and so I was telling her things that used to save me and like I told you earlier in The show, you know when I was all suicidal and stuff in a drunken and everything back in the days I had to literally leave humanity because I couldn't find any redeeming value in humans Just basically I every time there's a robot terminator I robot matrix I always root for the fucking robot because humans are a virus to me Yeah, and that's part of what I have to deal with in therapy So I get away from that and but earth is actually pretty amazing It's just a pretty like this lottery of biology that just you know kind of formed and so like shit The fucking thing that smashed into earth and became our moon could have been off by a quarter inch over a trillion miles gone Right past we'd still be a fucking rock You know There's just lottery after lottery in this amazing planet with these oceans and these these creatures that just are Fascinating and how they adapt and evolve and and stuff like that and when I really start focusing on those things then it's like Well, you know, I'm gonna be dead for a long time. Yeah, I'm gonna probably be really good at it You know shit, I'm gonna probably be really good at being dead. I don't think you'll fail at death I think I think for once in my life creepy. I will succeed at that.
Hey, man. I'm pretty I'm pretty excited about So but I'm gonna be dead a long time, but I'm not likely gonna be able to watch these fucking fish Or I'm not gonna be able to you know Go to the beach or see the trees or see life happen or you know all of this stuff And so I'm explaining this to her and my therapist goes She's like well, that's great I'm really glad you identify without you're able to get away So you should probably start, you know now that you use MCAT is over you should start going to the beach more and I instantly Like get like bristled it like bristles me just the sound of like I'm gonna go to the fucking beach And I go yeah like a giant fucking hippie pussy, you know And it just it just seems I'm gonna go and fucking drink tea and make a little seaweed crowns I'm gonna find peace and life and and she's like shit man. You just can't win with yourself I'll say after what she said. I was like a surprise she didn't run screaming for the room like I don't fucking know what to do She's like she's like you are just you have created nothing that you can win They're the the voices that want to stay depressed and feel sorry for yourself are so strong that you know things that are going to Actually help you relax and make you happy and then you create this entire Speech in your head of why that's stupid.
Yep, so you can then judge yourself further for actually liking it thus keeping yourself away Which is something I've done my whole life and I'm like well That's a topic that we need to talk about on the show because I'm really good at that So can I get this straight? Okay, you think to yourself? Maybe I'll take her suggestion go to the beach go to the beach and part of you actually says that might be a good idea And then the voice comes and said fucking Jesus Christ, who do you think you are going to the beach? So this happens a lot this happens constantly.
This is the this is the I don't know what you would call the inception second level of cognitive dissonance Where you judge both sides of logic, but you know what? I think a lot of people do this Yeah, I do it all I think a lot of people like study very hard for a test and then they don't and then that voice comes in and goes Yeah, you're studying eight hours a day for this fucking test and you're actually showing some progress But look at all these other people who didn't study as hard and they do better than you you fucking suck why bother why bother fuck this test Yeah, this is good drunk go. Go. Go do this.
There are so many things in our life that we judge Our judgment yeah that we just turn around and we have we know that there's an answer We know that there's something that we can do but we're so fucking good at just kicking the shit out of ourselves Kind of like I kick myself for liking the creative explorers asshole because we're out of our safe spot I think I think we see that that glint you know that that lean out of our safe spot We're like wow look at all that and then you look back. It's like yeah. Yeah, it's no He likes pain and suffering and I mean even masochist whatever okay Maybe some people like pain is over but most of us don't like misery and depression But even more so we are terrified of the change and what that's going to say about our identity Like if I go to the fucking beach and all of a sudden I'm peaceful and all of a sudden I now love people What is that gonna make shut up bitch Sounds fucking scary is what it is what's gonna happen who am I gonna be I'm not gonna be able to live up to this identity that I protected myself with No, but you just know because what you were has now changed from being an old curmudgeon You've now become an at-piece safe individual and that old you has changed into something new you're still who you are You're still alive and judging you yeah, I'm not saying it's bad. I want to be happy The logical voice is like what do I gain out of being unhappy nothing who gives up fuck if I'm unhappy nobody who gives a fuck if I'm happy Nobody this is our life and I can choose to be miserable and that's great There's billions of miserable people out there, but I can just as easily choose to be happy I can eat just as easily say you know what I can be miserable I'm really good at it or I can go back to being happy because I end up really liking that and I get to have sex with amazing people and Feel amazing and do amazing things so this is the logical you making those conclusions Yes, but that voice is afraid of losing my identity because because I'm getting older and because I'm getting weaker and because I'm in pain I always try to compensate for my fragility for my lack of masculine venom I make up for it with anger and hate and judgment and and self-righteousness And that still makes me feel like a badass even though physically I'm completely not a badass anymore Right so going to the beach.
Yeah now doesn't fit that even though it makes me happier I'm gonna lose my identity and at some point I'm just gonna have to realize guess what I'm an old man now You know cuz I've what we you and I've talked about this and I've wondered this about you for a while You are at heart a preacher you always joke that you're an evangelist for kink sure and your main kink is mentoring You said that you are a mentor that is actually a kink You love it This is why you're mentoring these two girls to get into college and make their dreams come true And you put a tremendous amount of time and energy into it both of those things would seem to indicate your love of people Yes, and yet you hate people you hate men in particular shit. We're right. That's full circle right there. Well, we already know I hate people but you love people well, we already knew that too So I do a show I do this show with you another example The the issue isn't the fact that we all have cognitive dissonance in circular thinking the issue is at some point You have to say stop it just put someone in the back of the bus Is it you guys talked about you and your shrink well?
I mean this is you know I've been going in and out of therapy and going through these types of things my whole life this therapy There's nothing new happening in this therapy This is just somebody who is objective that is sitting outside that is saying radical acceptance Have you done this before? Yeah, I did this in the program when you do the inventory. Well, you forgot it didn't ya? Yeah, I kind of did okay.
Well, how do we get back to that? So the love hate relationship that we have that's that's yeah, that's it's very true But at some point you just have to say do I want to be happy or do I want to be miserable because both are options And nobody gives a fuck You can go off into the sunset and put a fucking rope around your neck and go kill yourself You can do that and you can do it and be sad about it and not care if it leaves any damage because you're miserable You can do that you have permission. I give everyone in perverted podcast land permission to kill yourself It's your choice, but you look even not necessarily. I know but that is that right?
Yes, that's your goddamn right. It's your life But I found in my life That when I made the choice of going I can be miserable and really good at it or I can try this happiness thing when I do that It's an amazing experience. Yeah, I tried it and it's worth it. It's worth fighting for I'm not done fighting because notice I'm still alive Yeah, and this I mean obviously this is gonna it's gonna be a tough haul for you to maintain that level But you sound more dedicated to doing that now.
I'm more dedicated But this is this this last few months there's been a lot of identity It really comes down to my biggest struggle now is the identity and how boogie is gonna look to boogie and even though you guys on the outside Are all boogie, you know and you said it the other day you're way more attractive when you're confident because when you're an emo little bitch You're just not we can talk like that. I like me. I love to say that shit But it's because it's true when I'm confident and when I care about boogie I'm able to give better love and I'm able to be better But when I'm all toxic and self-pity and I'm miserable and in pain who the fuck's attracted to that? Nobody I'm not attracted to I don't want to be around this guy Why would other people want to be around so it comes down to that let go of the identity?
Maybe I just need to you know try some boogie the hater, you know, yeah people suck what is there anything new? Do I have to be angry at people they suck except it move on? Wow, that was quite I'm always amazed at your desire to share so yeah, that's pretty rough That's pretty fucking rough. That's but I want to throw it back to kind of a nerd kind of a way That's a total Kobayashi Maru's kind of situation.
It's called the no-win scenario Yes, and you know Kurt you know defeated that by cheating But I think that maybe maybe we do need to cheat a little maybe we need to change the way the game is played yeah, you know And I I went through what you did. I had that identity crisis where like I'm such an asshole all the time I fucking hate everything and then it was like oh try to be happy and nice and everybody's like what are you okay? What's wrong with you? Are you all right?
Why are you being so nice? So I had to find that delicate balance between asshole and Rather nice guy. I haven't found it yet. No God.
No, it's a journey Wait now the blue lights on oh, we're fucked yes. No actually didn't turn on this whole time We're at it. What's going on in the chat room? I mean With ugher and you know cuz there's really not a lot going on but they did have a special request for you anyway Oh, they want to hear alligator balls That's very funny you should you should you should you mean this?
Yeah Wish tell them Don't ruin the dream Just crime jam with That was a good segment Tell us how we can't go to the beach you said we were gonna go to the beach because I'm gonna get over this this that voice Blankets and I'll bring a cooler. Yeah, I went to the Leo Cabrio one. I love it. It was fucking awesome.
No one ever there Yeah, and there's camping you bring oh fuck no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no camping Well, I mean you're gonna be tense no no no no no no no I lived in a parking lot. I've lived outside creepy He's going back into angry guy. I've lived outside for ten years of my life watching it Money do you want to go camping no money doesn't want to go camping? They have outdoor grills we could have a steak for lunch we could we could or we could the beach or we could just build a tin For an aluminum foil bowl and then pour alcohol and another I cooked a steak in my VW bus in rubbing alcohol.
I had Christmas dinner at Leo Cabrio. It was good It's a dead squirrel you trumped me. That's just I can't beat that did you had was it next to the restaurant? No, I'm not happy I've heard dinner.
This is great squirrel. This is guy love squirrel I knew this shrink tank was gonna be tough for you So I picked up a little mailbox you might like okay yay This is but I do not know how to pronounce this one This is some creature that if you were you she would know simorg simorg simorg More days I'm more more more days Suddenly see more okay stop it. Okay. I don't know SIM or GH.
Oh my god Bunny just literally almost farted out of her skin She just wants to start singing suddenly see I love it so much Sorry, but no Neither one of you can sing that That you can hear Cuz I'm a dentist Come on don't worry man. I love that musical I love everything about it. I saw the play I saw the movie I was in the movie this fucking Steve Martin Oh baby go on Get my gold away. Okay, everybody perfect podcast line that's your assignment for the week go and watch little shop of Horrors and There I hate that they butchered the ending Okay, so she writes in and says so Daddy and I have been listening to the last episode together Then a day later this happened and she sent us a picture of a giant poster that her daddy had made up And it's titled the super awesome pumpkin daddy action plan Oh, she says he printed it out in a giant poster size and put it on my wall now I have orders to help me follow through with my last weeks of studying and a constant reminder that daddy Believes in me supports me and knows I can do it Thank you boogie for making the world better one exam at a time and for spreading the amazing My pain and suffering is her daddy's pain and suffering Your story of how you put keep new on a schedule was very inspiring to him.
Well, I mean that's I mean as far as doing the the I don't yeah Hey You were talking about and that we were talking about earlier where it this is what keeps us going doing the show you hear shit like this We just are proving proving their lives because of something I said and they're trying it to that's we pay it forward We are the San Mandala you sound like Obi-Wan actually you're One of them's up my ass Okay, what I don't remember any of the others Yeah, thank you very much. Yes, we all do stuff and now other people can go and do That was a huge freakin poster. He put some time and energy into that he spelled out everything she has Is there a schedule what is there some way that our preferred podcast listeners could see it somewhere? Maybe could be posted on well if you're listening and you want to do that just tell us and we'll put it on Like she sent it to us and I don't think they'll get you.
He is right up. We yeah Paper doll in charisma came in this is this is a this goes into the swinger conversation So like they're dying to get in because this kind of creepers across the street in a pickup truck He's just sitting there like ladies This is a sex dungeon right like I can stick my wiener in my So I go to the door to let them in because they if they don't call I don't hear the text so it went like seven And so they're just sitting out there go. Oh, dear God. Please open the fucking door.
I open the door I start ushering them in this guy calls from a cross room. Hey, is there a party going on? No, and I like do I know this person because I don't know my glasses on so I'm like is that Joe? And I'm like I don't think it's just you know Maybe someone's making a joke I try to give humanity the benefit of the doubt and then it's not just some creepy piece of shit But it turns out it was a creepy piece of shit and he's I'm like what he's all party and I'm already going on in there And I'm like I'm not wearing my glasses.
Do I know you and he's like no? No, I'm just here making a call and I'm like right. I'm like no party. He's like Like I'm really hoping there's not any like things that are not actually bird shit on my car when I go back out Party No Being disgusting pigs Didn't have to yeah, I don't know why it waited so long.
Just fuck the pig and get over with it Is that pig pig makes or elephant makes love to a pig what no black Mary it's Netflix Okay, so what wait did I press the sun fucking device? Oh? Oh Sometimes love is less than nice you may need some fucking advice right now I want to know why that was part of the swinger cover is he because he wanted to jerk okay guys He came here not looking for a meaningful rope bondage relationship, okay You drop on me. I've just come oh I've had guys pull up in vans like I'm out in the front and I swear to God some fucking I mean this guy was just like every stereotype You look like that it was a white van, but it was like all beat day shit with the fenders coming off And you know duct tape on the windows and that go in and he comes out of the van and I look at him And he's like I'll scraggle hair like literally this is this is just a typical This is fucking no and he comes up to the door and I just have to be like sweeping or something We're not open and he's like hey, what's going on inside?
Oh my God and I fucking teeth look like chunks of fucking like You know small children are just like oh, and I'm like nothing going on inside Why do you think's going inside? He's like some hot nasty sex and I'm like no that's no no no we we talk about Jesus here The tears for it's the cross the cross our blood of Christ are you just in the living your life Jesus? So many of creeper parking life stories They come by during the day they just drive down there on others and sex live if that door is open obviously It's on Google Maps just typing sex fuck dungeon I Just had sex with my tailpab They're warm and you know you get that backfire go okay. All right.
I'm done carbon monoxide. I'm a wiener carbon my cockside. Yeah I mean therapy. I look right at Kathy's eyes on a star for life I can't see that in my night.
I mean Percy perverted podcast trying for less listeners every day last we need another button Everybody commit suicide. We had just had a big jump to there's a whole bunch of new people listening to us and they're just Reevaluating their life choices right now. Just going wow, you know Last podcast on the left. Let's go.
Let's go listen to that Everyone in your nose the great podcast I am not going to continue I will turn this podcast around Doesn't that guy from the MMA what is it Seth Rogan or he has a great podcast to people should listen to that one Awesome gravity bomb man. That's obviously it's like three grand. It's amazing good That's what you want. I'm sure there's some like really quality crab cooking Into that just giving you Bill Burr has a great podcast Bill Burr just go listen to bill Burr.
It's like every Monday or something. Oh, maybe what hurt is those laughing That meth fucking mess I'm saying people the other podcast. It's all that driving around the parking for six inches I sure to gather like 80 missing teeth at his mate I'm a hugest the bell of the ball You know that's when you're done to the swing party there was a guy in there that looked just like it He had long hair, but he had that like bald patch there God he was fucking this girl who was just not happy about what was going on And it was bad cuz like we all walked in and my girlfriend You know at the time was exceptionally like like a piece of meat You know looking like and he just his eyes blew up and he follows her into the room and she she waits until or he waits until she makes Icon tag and he just like lumbers this huge like disgusting finger and like pulls her over and like points down to his girl and Just spits up her beer up to the floor My god, yeah, this guy was awesome. I could have thrown down a fucking rolled up carpet in the wig You would have fucked it.
Oh, yeah, that's the nasty It's like being a lesbian for munching all these carpet Ow, I don't have any more left in me. What? I can't think of any other good podcast a lot of good atheists in science. Yeah cognitive dissonance.
That's a good Doesn't the other grass types and have a great podcast? He's joining in I love tactical baths man when I get tactical baths. It's just it's are you No, are you Kim trolling on us man? It's so creepy don't you Kim?
Girl on this podcast when alien people take over this fucking race and this planet has to move to Mars in order to survive Obama's frickin Muslim attacks on this country you gotta understand that I'm gonna be ready I do have been listening to Alex Jones fucking preppers The reptiles already here there amongst us No music serial killer get right she's in her cool down face So yeah, I don't know I'm gonna read it. No forget it. I let you read anything Alright, Taylor Roto said dear boogie and Kathy. I wanted to sit here and write you a fancy email But then I thought who the hell am I kidding?
This is boogie. It's like they know me. I can't unfortunately emailing crayon She says I am almost the PPZ am I have a few episodes to catch up on I just finished episode 130 drunk a bunny birthday Good one. Yeah good one.
Hepstinal day, and it was awesome I listened to it while running my errands and actually laughed out loud and snorted while walking down the street I would love to have a clip of bunny singing unger unger. It was the cutest thing ever. Did you ever put that? Well, she wants it Boogie I wanted to say that you are an inspiration I am also an addict and have mental health issues hearing you speak about your life and how you overcame gives me hope that I can do it also Now under her question.
She says I recently lived through my first breakup from a triad Oh, that's gotta be harsh I was surprised at how much harder it is to manage than a regular breakup he and I had been in a de-is relationship for a year and a half But we were never romantically involved. It was purely kink a few months ago He started dating a new girl and we stopped playing after a few weeks We made contact again and we started talking about me being their third we tried it and we had some fun But it was getting really complicated. I always felt like I was intruding and a third wheel I've ended things with them, but now things are super awkward. It feels similar to how abyss felt when boogie started seeing you I Know abyss left to get some distance, but do you think that there is any hope to keep these friends?
That's a loaded question. Wow Well, well my did you say no well my crayon scribbling friend? There's a lot of variables here and that's the one thing about Polly is you now have more variables the friendship Which are we going to remain friends? Well that definitely depends on the other people involved in that poly relationship and then the influence that each of those have on each other and Whether or not they want to work at keeping the friendship Going that is the big question isn't because she may want this friendship But the partner may not want her in the in the maybe or he wants her in the partner or the partner wants her You know, yeah, there's variables and ultimately ultimately I find that I Am a big supporter of give a little space and let the brain stupid chemicals leave because it's hard to make rational decisions When somebody else is in a relationship with someone that you were even if you know it was for the best that it ended There's still chemicals there.
There's nothing wrong with giving a couple months of some separation to give people their space And obviously you still have all this history if abyss came back and sat down we have years of History together all of our all of our love for each other all of the good stuff that we did is still right there and a little bit of space Is good. Yeah, there's nothing wrong. It's not like all of a sudden I mean maybe if 20 years goes by and it's like me you go through all these radical life changes Yeah, the person's gonna be totally different But in general a few months of space gives everyone a chance to kind of relax and then see if they actually miss that friendship that relationship And then you can kind of keep going with it. That's what I've always done.
I've I have maybe two Relationships that I don't really talk to I mean we're civil But I don't really have anyone that I'm not a friend to or like a biscuit. I'd be there for abyss You know for pretty much anything, you know, because she's just an amazing special person just because we're not in a relationship anymore So but that time was really important for us, right? Well, the thing is that there's not a lot that there's a whole bunch missing from this email Obviously because you're not gonna tell us everything but you have no idea how these other people felt was there any communication? Did you guys all sit down and discuss it or did she just sense awkwardness and she pulled back herself?
Yeah, and the thing about being in women any relationship But definitely in poly is you need just a sense of super super Honesty and people need to be forthcoming with how they're feeling no matter how hard it is to do and that is hard to come by so Otherwise what happens is you're sitting there in the dark not knowing why things are awkward not knowing why you feel uncomfortable not understanding where these people Are coming from and honesty is not something that people are always willing to give You have you sat down and talked to him to find out what he actually felt or this other girl Are you even friends with this other girl? Are you just acquaintances at this point because if you are not understanding and these people are not telling you where they're coming from? What they're thinking what their dark thoughts are what their negative thoughts are that they're hard to say out loud You're gonna have a hard time having any kind of relationship with them king friend or otherwise because and let me tell you Some people they have a problem with honesty simply because they don't want to hurt you and they figure these things are better left than set Other people might think I'm honest with my feelings with that doesn't mean I'm obligated to tell you I just assume keep it to myself for various reasons So when I say honesty is hard to come by it's not always for bad reasons Sometimes you think you're doing the right thing but without that level of honesty You're never gonna know why it's awkward. You're never gonna know where they're coming from You're never gonna know do they actually want to be friends and without that you are probably are better off just backing off and walking away from it Yeah, is it worth the hassle of trying to figure this out versus just letting it go exactly because I don't talk to any of my exes I don't I'm not like a lone wolf.
I don't need it. I our relationship ends ended I don't need closure with them. The closure was that goodbye. They're doing their own lives Sometimes I look to see what they're doing just to make sure that you know, it's what I wanted and I've never gone back I never talked to him like hey, we should yeah surely don't stop like if you're I was made to feel unwelcome my whole childhood If you don't want to be with me in a relationship, man, I don't call you I don't stock I don't I you know, hey off you go, but I do like I do like having I guess it's just how all the relationships have ended you know And I guess it's different for everyone But yeah, a lot of people like that detachment I have friendships with with pretty much all of my exes and some of I haven't talked to in years obviously But but they would say how do you on the street?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, and probably one of the things she needs to do first Is ask herself why do you want to continue being friends? Do you just want to be friends only with him? Is that what you're thinking and not so much with her? Do you want to be friends with both of them?
What exactly is your goal here? What is it that you seek to accomplish by desiring to continue to be friends? I have no idea what that is and you're gonna have to do some soul searching to find out like we've decided even worth it So you're gonna have to be ready for that like well, I just don't love you anymore That yeah, you're gonna be ready for the things that are hard to hear honesty is not always fun to hear and sometimes Relationships can't come back from that level of honesty because if you do hear from this other girl The truth is that I don't really like you that much and just because he was in a relationship with you doesn't mean that I have to be in a relationship with you and I have nothing common and I don't see I don't want to pursue a relationship with you I don't like you because you were in a relationship with them. Yeah, but you're a bad poly partner anyway, but Probably is hard exactly So this is a tough one and not an easy answer in particular since we don't have that much information from her about the more the specifics That would make it easier for us to answer but but it's difficult till you that's gonna be a hard one Find out for yourself what you want first and foremost.
I want to crayon email You're not getting a crayon email. That would be so awesome I mean fuck all the shit that Google lets you do right? You know it'd be like there should just be like the fucking email like you should have like a mose New email fuck it email and it just be just like blotches of crayon in giant letters Just like weird people Tell them that they have to start bringing sending you start sending crayon pictures if you drawing stuff I'll cut it out and put it on the threshold refrigerator with magnets. I be like people like what is this?
I'm special I'm not gonna be angry. I'm going to the beach like I'm gonna be a hippie I'm gonna be a hippie. I'm not gonna I'm just gonna camp out on your couch and smoke all your weed and eat your food and say right now This was my time to find myself and then you're gonna support me But then when I'm done with that time then I'll get a job and then you can you can also pour you but that that transition never fucking happens With hippies with hippies Are you going to be a hippie infested weather hippies and swingers in your house? I try to put pork acid around the bed that hippies should start like some kind of extermination like I do hate hippies We should drive around in a beat up van put Julie.
Hey, you want to get rid of your swingers. It's a bit. Pachouli is not a fucking deodorant Just remember that. It's just not a It's not a It's not a It's an odorant.
It's an it's an essential oil that gives me from dying really bye That is our show. Thank you for providing this career to playground for us recorded If you are in the Los Angeles surrounding area visit threshold auto or find out about joining your Kiki family Thank you to everyone in the love left tonight once again to paper anger and everybody in the chat room To creepy sticks crazy money Yeah Questions comments or ideas either email us at the root of podcast at gmail.com or call us at 424262037 and don't forget to visit perverted podcast I'm and finally this song we're gonna take out is a very very fun song that another one of the electronics on I'm just trying to crank them out and learn a bunch of stuff This one is about the lobster takeover and annihilation and it has mu and it has mu all over it is very exciting And it is called we are lobster and but before that I have a conversation with somebody in this room last night that maybe they were saying something and passed and joking But I had mentioned we hadn't been faking on the show in a long time And and I was sitting there and thinking of course as you know as you peel a piece of raw ginger and make a Bubblegout of it put in a button It's a little thingy and fun and we've done it on the show with mixed results with new and a bit there's a lot of fuck use from a bit on that day and Charisma just happened to be sitting there and her eyes perked up and she said I'd be interested in trying faking So I said and then I go to bunny and I said hey bunny Would you be interested if chrismas interested in putting you know doing faking on you guys go with that Okay, no no no no bunny would be putting you know I will I will mold the beautiful ginger but put a car and then bunny will help with the insertion And then we will see how you're still down for that when you want to do that. Let's nail this now Don't you need to get permission? No, I got to serve.
Oh, okay. What did you talk about anyway? Okay on the anniversary well the anniversary shows coming up in six so on the three year I want to do faking on the anniversary show great. We will shove ginger we will shove raw ginger up As asked that will be our three year anniversary.
It'll be great We will see you guys next week so 152 and we love you. No just kidding stay with our podcast really You can listen to the other