161. How Much Can This Dog Deadlift?

Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! Lords: Shannon Avery Topics: Measure words Is color even real? https://www.reddit.com/r/Poetry/comments/hdrdlt/poem_my_cat_is_sad_spencer_madsen/ Microtopics: Game Changer. Why various albums aren't on Spotify. During the American Revolution when the British were always quartering punk bands in colonial household. The Bug Porn calendar that Shannon drew for the FF2 ARG. A singular bug in a pin-up pose. A praying mantis cosplaying as a nun. Learning a language and then forgetting it because you're too embarrassed to speak it around people. A soup vs. a bowl of soup. Thousands of years of associating this thing with this other thing. How singing works in tonal languages. The people who keep insisting that orange doesn't rhyme with anything. That time Tom Lehrer rhymed "orange" with "bizarre enjoyment." Memory palaces. Stand over mouth next to person equals. The "two six-packs" mnemonic for remembering what the two dots on the guitar fretboard mean. Mnemonics that you would prefer to forget. The blue/black/gold/white dress. Changing the perceived color of an object by changing the lighting in the room. Whether light is real. Naming a color and never telling anybody the name. Keeping a color swatch because your memory of a color might drift over time, but the swatch fades. Perfect pitch for color perception. Getting two sensory outputs from a single sensory input. A deeply visual species. Striving to be amazed and confused by things normal people take for granted. Visualization but for smells. A list of attributes of what your daughter looks like. Blind sight. Seeing but having no experience of sight. Hashtag Kant Folks. Discerning green and pink. Do these two sexy nazi ponies look the same to you? The purpose of music theory. The invention of standardized tunings. Where to find poems. A cat who does not have a cat. A cat wondering why nobody else in his family is a cat. Things it is funny for a cat to be sad about. Why the family cat didn't go to college. Making sure to get a pet early enough that you child can see it die before going to college. Getting a second dog vs. getting your dog a dog. Dog IQ tests. The placards at the dog shelter listing each dog's D&D stats and alignment. Cockatiel owners. A sporting event that measures how hungry you are. How many cinder blocks you'd pull for a kingdom's Klondike bar. Looking into a well during the full moon and saying Avery's name a hundred times. Dating a string of Lisas. Six Songs For Lisa. Starting your six song album on song number three.