Hey guys, ready to show? Woo! Ohh. Cricut.
It's just one week to the next. The following show is for mature audiences only. Listener discretion is advised, and if you don't like it, please go fuck yourself. One, two, three, four!
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Recording live from the threshold of live in North Hollywood, California, in front of ourselves. And you? That's right, and I'm happy. I am Boogie.
Me, me, me. And you? You're so cute! And now she has a renewed kind of vigor because we just watched an anime.
What was it? Elf in the darkness or something? Elf sort of? Elf something.
It was great, and it was just blood, and you know, these girls had horns in their heads, and hands came out, ghost hands came out, and they ripped people in half, and it was sexy because it was finally an anime that we watched that had titties in it, you know, and lots of nudity. Finally, you mean? The split personality, you know, creatures being humans is like half human, but it's also this other donculate, the Clones, the Clones acts, she keeps giving me the hand. I have seen so many anime's Cathy with you, and it's like I remember none because it's all in Japanese, so I have two words in Japanese that I know.
And so I just don't remember the names, but they're so awesome. They're having so much fun. There were titties. When was there not titties?
Lucy when she killed people, but then when she was in her other thing, she was new. For the podcast listeners, if you know the anime that I'm talking about, please send me the title. I'm sure she can tell me after when she gets her. This is where she gets her.
She's now. Go ahead. Mew Mew. Otherwise known as?
Mew Mew. That's right. I have another theory. I think that she's getting it because she's sitting in Unger's chair and some of the Ogre Ungerness has worn off, has kind of imbued itself.
That actually wasn't a pretty description. Unger, Unger. I'm like, can you please shower after the show that the Ogreness is now. It's on your chair.
You'll be infused with Unger. Unger Farts on that chair. Ow. I did not want to know that.
I guess we're here. Last week we had 800 people and this week it's you, Mew Mew again. It's just the door swings open and then it shuts tight. It does.
I kind of like it because this is a good, it's going to be a great tight show and lots of fun stuff. What did you do this weekend, Kavi? I was at Creative Explorer's place and I was giving him a little bit of assistance because he's moving into, he just bought a house. Congratulations, Creative.
I screamed leave it on the counter five minutes. That's right. That's what it is. I don't know.
It's weird. Do you hate him for having a house? No. I'm not going to lie.
This is a little bitterness there. Just a little bitterness. You're just done. Yeah.
I mean he works hard. He works hard and he's earned it. But you know he's a prickly character and I'm a prickly character and it's amazing we get to the point where we're fucking it all. When cactus is fucked.
It's like a new doctor. As we have all these lines you don't cross and we each say in each other just neutral areas and everything else is carefully negotiated and it works. But you throw a new place into the mix and at some point. It actually does fuck with people.
It really does. And at some point we're at Bed Bath and Beyond looking at curtains. I'm showing him this. That is so yummy.
Because I am not walking around your apartment with no curtains on windows naked. It's not going to happen. So you need to get some fucking curtains on there. So I'm all let's just go to Bed Bath and Beyond so you can look at them and it just started to feel eerily domestic.
Well that place is for those of you that are not in the area that has Bed Bath and Beyond is kind of the Frufi place that has all the household accoutrements and towels and little things and bathroom hangings and sink handles and you know it's like all you know. Well I just I love Bed Bath and Beyond but it's weird being there with your friend. I hate you. You was going to point for it.
I haven't used that word. Hey word and that's like it's the closest. You know this whole thing is making me very uncomfortable right now. So there was some lines crossed and there was some discussions that had to be had.
Was it at the Crapes Bachelor? Was it at the shower curtains? Oh god damn curtains have fucking ended a lot of relationships. So he would yeah he's getting all his ducks in a row and getting everything and he's even going to move in Saturday.
He doesn't get air conditioning for another like five days. So I said look just in case you're thinking of inviting me over that weekend. Don't even bother. No AC, no DS.
I'm sorry I love you but you got to give me some air conditioning. That would be amazing. I want you to nail beer. You know what?
Fuck you. You see this fucking pussy? Go get me a fucking ice cube bitch. It's next to your fucking ice cream sandwiches.
Hey I almost got myself into it because I've had a rough week. I'm not going to do it but I had a very close friend of mine pass away. So it's been it's been tough and surprisingly being a creative explorers house makes it. I can relax and not think or do anything and he's totally fine with it.
He'll just ignore me and go to his computer and play his video games and it's all good. So I've enjoyed being there but at this last weekend like at the end of that long week we were at the store and for some reason I was getting so sappy and just so just skirting the edge of your mouth is going to get you in a lot of trouble Cathy and I just he just kept saying things like hey look I got it we were at bonds. He's like I got a bonds rewards card because I was at the pool mine out and I go well I'll give for you. You got a card brother.
Oh my God. We're down the aisle so we're and he's like I say something sassy and he grabs the back of my hair and he goes you want to be careful or I'm going to put your head down to the ground and I'm looking like you don't have the fucking nerve and he's like oh really and he starts to push me down I immediately turn into. I'm sorry I gave it. Not a bonds not in the market.
I don't know what's wrong with me. It just was very punchy. It might be something to do with the house and you're not having a house I mean not having a house. It was just it was hot it was a long week it was a difficult week I wasn't at my best and that's how it comes out I just I lash out and I get sassy and I want to push you and it's creative explore I want to push him and I want to and I thought we're in public I can get away with the shit and he does not.
He has no social barometer. None. He could not it just is not even on his radar and so I and then I we got back to his place and I just fucking dropped I just was exhausted I said on the couch with was like night and day all my energy had left you know it's been a weird week and I don't know that was my week but I did get some dick. You've got some dick.
Was it was it was it hard and and and poundy. It was very very poundy and put me a position I don't like and he knows I don't like it. He did it on purpose. Was it the flying Dutchman?
Was it the flying Dutchman? That's when you got like one leg up and you have to yodel. No. I got a bad back I can't do that.
I'm fat and I got a frozen shoulders. No. No. No.
No flying. It's no flying Dutchman for can for Tammy. I don't even know your name. Is that my new name?
Oh my god that reminds me. Okay I have another story. Well I can't just I can't believe we go to Ikea to pick out a day. Oh my god you're just so domestic fucking kill yourself.
I don't listen to myself going shit did I do all that. Ikea the bath and beyond Jesus fucking. So we go and we're driving and I don't know if you've ever used the Waze app. It's like the Google map Waze Waze.
Okay. And have your download and it's got GPS and you tell it where you want to go and it's this female voice going take a left here. It's Lois. It sounds just like fucking Lois.
Lois is fucking two timing us. And she's so we're driving down the 170 or whatever fucking freeway we're on and I can't help it. I've got it on my phone and every once in a while she'll go. And I'm like it's Lois.
I'm doing it over and it's Lois. I'm such a woe. I'm such a woe. I'm doing it right.
Two timing is a fucking GPS opera. She said she was fucking in foreign countries embedded with soldiers. Because you and I were using that same app to get out to bunnies this weekend and it's fucking Lois. Lois is.
I know. I don't know maybe she's so finely fed up with you. No I think you want to get with me or actually make some fucking money once in a while. Well you can only be a whore for so long and then it just stops bringing in the bank.
You know it just does. Well I had an incredible weekend. An actual weekend that was actually pretty incredible. Okay I'm going to say yeah it was pretty awesome because I actually left threshold.
What what left I left the building. I left the building. Me and I got supplies together. Computers all the things we need and we went to bunnies house you know 60 miles away.
Bunny usually makes the trek in here because bunny lives with her parents that don't know I exist. Why did you go over there then? Well because they were out of town and she's like I have to take care of the pets. So you know I can I can come over but then I have to leave the same day unless you guys want to come out here.
And it was just like and of course instantly I'm like yeah I don't want to leave. And but you know she's by the beach you know only like 20 minutes from the beach. And I'm like you know what we don't go out there and obviously there's not really chances to go out there. So we're like I'm like honey we're coming out and she was really excited you know because she's like I get to cook for you and you know it'll be like it was like.
Did you bring a hostess gift? What? I've just gone over to the mess again. I brought my cock.
I brought my cock and a giant carrot that we shaved off and f**ked me with. There you go. She bunny f**ked her with a giant carrot there's a picture of it on for her to b**k ask that life group. And then bunny put on her bunny outfit and then bunny f**ked her with this giant carrot.
It was so it was it was just super nice to go out and I was really terrorized. I did all this cleaning because it's the first time I wasn't going to be at a Saturday party at least to check in and make sure everyone was okay and be mom and you know whatever and I'm like okay I know they got this they don't f**king need me and so I just made sure to have all the paper towels and everything and so I'm like okay I'm not going to be here. So just you know I'm sure you guys got this but I'm going nobody called and we said a f**king word they're like yeah we know to do this and so it was it was really hard to get out there but then you know we got out there and it was great. We hung out we had a nice meal we watched Moana we violated you know she had never because she kind of grew up in that house and she had never really had sex in that house because it's not it's her parents.
So you violated each room? So not each room but you know enough hers her bed. What if her parents had come home early? I was ready for that.
I was completely ready for I slept on the couch. I just slept on the couch so like if I woke up I'd be like yeah I'm you and bunny's friend you know they're in the actual bed so we're all buddies we're gonna go to the beach tomorrow you know had my little thing so I wouldn't you know out here and I was reparinated so I'm constantly cleaning things and put anything to the bunny's blog. So I'm like making beds and making sure that when they come in you know because I was unwelcome my whole life in my own home so when I know I'm in a place that somebody would be like I don't want you in my house I'm kind of like extra on edge but it was still real nice we watched Moana because I hadn't seen the whole thing we started watching like a year ago and then so we watched it it was a lot of fun and then we did all sorts of great fun sexy stuff and then the next day we went to the beach and actually went in the water I hadn't actually gone in the water and jumped in waves in a long long time. Mew is terrified of the ocean I actually got hurt ago and probably all the way up to her chest and I let her ride me so it's like basically you're just using daddy as a surfboard to smash his face into waves so you don't get the splash.
Boogie the surfboard. Boogie the surfboard. Boogie board thank you and so they loved it you know so I'm just jumping on my turn and so it was fun it was it was great and I was able to not be here and and really I noticed just all the stress and homeless people and trash and urine and issues and whatever even though it was just literally an overnight trip two days I was really able to leave you know I was really able to leave the shit here not that I don't love it here in all the amazing but it was really great to actually just get away for a day and kind of you know just spend it with my girls and and we just had a really nice time and then at the end of the day it was awesome because she has all these like weird pets and then you know she has this teeny little dog within eating disorders so it's just teeny doesn't eat enough and then neurotic cats that go and hunt things and and then and then there's this one this one they're both like poodles like white white white white like make white supremacists feel insecure about the color of their skin white I mean these dogs are fucking just like matrix poodle you know like those super but it was albino so it had like black shark eyes and it's just teeny little and it's fat you know the one super super skinny other one's like totally fat because it eats all the food that the other one with the eating disorder doesn't eat and and it's friendly enough but it has these black black shark eyes and then because it's kind of got pink albino skin around the eyes it looks like just these black dots with blood around it like I mean literally it's it's like oh really it's it's it's and it's a nice dog I spent you know it comes out and you know bunny it's fucking the dogs just there waiting for food 24 seven they're following me around they're like you're obviously a sucker because we can work this motherfuckers I'm like alright fine have a friendship you know so I fell for it so the dogs like always around so so it was fun and then at the end you know we had done all the things I felt really really good because I was doing good as a lover you know they had lots of work as I had none you know I felt really good it was really exciting and then I'm like you know what it's the end of the trip it just got out of the shower Viagra is still kicking and I'm like you know what I want to fucking double blow job I want to fucking take my girls and I want my grab bunny and and I you know I'm on the couch and I put her down and then you know of course I'm using playing video games because she's you know she does. I'm like I am would you like to join us please and she comes so she's like oh okay sure so she comes over and and so they start doing the thing and I'm like just relax and try to enjoy it because I don't like receiving things but I'm like you know what I'm just gonna enjoy this just both my girls giving me oral service and it was just sexy and whatever and then you know I'm on the couch and then there's this coffee table that was a little high and I'm like sitting and like literally right in the middle of where I am with two girls work in my junk fucking Hellspon poodle loaf comes right from under the table nine inches away from my cock with this look of fucking crazed serial killer demonology like staring straight at me just like oh and I'm like and I'm like go Hellspon poodle lo.
Stop and they're looking and this dog and we kind of try to shove it and and bunny's like no no no just go because the dogs definitely can't hear so you're kind of motion for it to go and it would kind of go under and it's like no and it would come literally right back out with its head under and it would just be like with its eyes extra right I didn't see it this widely entire trip and it's just looking like what are you doing like maybe you know maybe the dog thought my cock was food because bunny was eating it and it's like well I want someone I'm like you can't have the cock and we kept trying to show me how to kill under and then come right back up Hellspon poodle loaf I'm coming to get you and literally we all start laughing. Why just take the dog outside too late my dick fucking goes limp and we're just laughing and I'm like oh my god fucking Hellspon poodle loaf just this fat people looking demon dog just totally cock block my fucking amazing end of weekend double blow jump. Oh no fuck me. That life is the place where you and a corn's play but then they fuck each other in the ass with their horns because that's the kind of freaky shit that happens on their life.
Oh your piece of mind please know that the author of every post we talk about it specifically granted his permission to do so. Kathy yes let's talk about a Fitlife boost. I'm still thinking about demon loaf dog fucking Hellspon poodle loaf because it's just this round tube of a fucking sausage dog with like blood pink shark eyes. It's just like what are you doing?
Get away from me. Sexiness and I'm going to see that in my head. It's like this fucking weird ass looking dog. It's cute.
I need to take a picture of it. We'll put it on the website right next to a Hellspon poodle loaf. Fuck it. It's funny.
Oh my god. All right. Today's post is by Jess on the rocks. She wrote a piece called your brain is an asshole.
It is true. I thought of you, buddy. Thank you. She says I spent a long time feeling really badly about myself and for all that time I thought I was the problem.
I wasn't good enough. I wasn't sexy. I wasn't submissive or masochistic or slutty enough. You're not good enough.
You feel like you're not good enough? You're being an asshole to yourself. Maybe you need to take stock of what's going on around you and tell your brain to shut the fuck up because you tell yourself some ugly things and you spend way too much time believing words you made up yourself. Stop that shit.
You're enough more than. Bravo. Bravo, bravo. Here we go.
Very well. Now I in she wrote this post for a friend. So she was speaking to a friend who was having the issues. Probably some relationship issues.
Exactly. And so I get that a lot of times will a lot of times the post that we talk about don't necessarily have anything to do with kink. And I guess you could say the same here. She's talking about sex and relationships.
But surely kink adjacent. I mean at all. Because these things affect every part of your life. Kink is about relationships the play a seconder.
I think most of our listeners understand that. Yeah. And so I know that in the past you and I have talked about when you have issues when you're telling yourself this shit. Sometimes it is you.
You can't always put it off on something else because sometimes you do have to take stock, take inventory, find out where your responsibility lies. That's not what this post is about. This post is about the times where your brain is not your best friend. Your brain is telling you all this shit.
And so I believe in all your life. And the reason that I chose this post that really spoke to me is because that has been a large part of my life as well. And it is something that coming into the kink community actually was when I could stop doing that. When I saw and again I will say I know we live in a very large city and we get a big variety of classes and parties and people.
And this isn't the case everywhere. But in my community here what I found was so much so much variety. So many differences in people and people owning their variety and not apologizing for it and not talking themselves down. It gave me a sense of freedom.
And again I'll say that I know that not everyone has that same experience but I certainly did. It was a big lesson for me. It was one of the first times in my life where I could say that my environment, the people around me affected me in a very positive way. Because they ran contrary to that voice in my head.
Because that's exactly what she's talking about. Those voices in my head, they ruin my life. They don't allow me to deal with what's really there. And it wasn't of course until much later in life that I realized, well you actually do need to listen to that voice, break it down, find out how much is true, how much is not true.
Throw the shit out the door and then deal with what's really there. I never knew to disseminate to put it apart like that. But in my experience I'm very grateful that Kink has had that opposite effect for me. This Kink community has allowed me to see so many people who are not ashamed of their bodies, who are not ashamed of the way they do their Kink, who don't care that their submissive nature is different from another person's submissive nature.
And they just own it and they run with it. Not everybody obviously, but enough to make a real impact on me. And allow me to see such a difference that I was willing to let that, willing to tell that voice in my head to shut the fuck up. It's very liberating.
Yes. It really is. And once again to our perverted podcast listeners who are new, this is, this is a special free gift. The free gift that you didn't expect when you get into a positive BDSM community.
There are negative BDSM communities. I can't speak for every community around the world. But when you get into one that has a lot of support and kind of that goal towards communication and learning yourself better, learning your partners better, this is the free gift. And the free gift is that you become enough for yourself.
Because that was kind of the angle that I took out of it. I mean I understand she was writing this for a friend. I surely understand your point of view because I received the same gifts being in the lifestyle and being around all these different people with all different shapes and sizes and levels of insecurity about who they are and what they are. And I learned so many things so early on, just like you did, you know, all of a sudden seeing three, 400 pound people walking around naked and being like, this is me.
This is it. And I deserve to get my kink on. So this person wants to have kink with me. So that's fuck you if you don't like it.
That was such an amazing, those were such amazing, powerful moments for me as somebody who's always been so insecure about how I look and my weight and those types of things. Not that I walk around the club naked. You do not. I do not.
But it has been very liberating. But the thing I also, one of the things I learned in being not just in the lifestyle, but all the communication that I learned since being in the lifestyle is becoming enough for myself is the first start of a relationship. The first start of a relationship that's going to be positive. Because if you try to enter any relationship, play partner, whatever it is, dating, and you are not good enough for yourself, you are going to have a difficult time in any relationship that you are in before you seek that validation of being good enough.
Because you know that is just literally one of the most common things. Oh, I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough. Because we were made to feel like that when we were kids a lot of us.
You're not good enough. You're not smart enough. You're disappointing me. You're not living up to this.
And then that kind of carried into adulthood. So a lot of us have that I'm not good enough thing. And we seek that validation in our relationships. And so when we don't feel we're good enough, then obviously it's devastating and it feeds right back into that game that we play with ourselves where our mind becomes an asshole and keeps us down.
And so I try to get away from ever needing to be good enough for a partner. I have to first start with am I good enough for boogie? Because if I'm good enough for boogie, then I deserve to accept myself. And I deserve to be in a relationship with somebody or have a play partner.
I deserve to have my feelings heard. I deserve that my feelings are valid no matter whether they are right, wrong, rational, irrational, but my feelings because I'm feeling them that I'm okay to have those feelings. And the more I become enough for myself, the more I then want to grow and the more I have to actually offer in a relationship. Because one thing that I really like to focus on is the truth.
And the truth is that this thing about being good enough is really subjective to each individual, what they want, what they're thinking, what they think they deserve and what you think you deserve. This is two people that have to be combatable on what is enough for them. And most of the time, you're not going to be enough and they're not going to be enough in some way, shape or form. Well, you can't be everything.
You can't. And a lot of people do and a lot of people get very, very fucked up because they're like, oh, I'm not good enough for her. I'm not good enough for him because I'm not this or I'm not that. And that's just a ridiculous trap that you can't possibly win.
My goal in a relationship is who I am and who they are compatible enough and nurturing enough to be beneficial to both of us. I don't need to be when I focus on whether or not I am the best or I am the person that has beat out all their other people in being good enough. It's a trap and I lose. So I just try to take the enough word because it really, I don't see any benefit to it.
I don't see any benefit to asking, am I good enough? Am I benefiting this person's life? Do I put out the energy like they talked about in the post? I love them enough.
You do all these things. You know that you deserve to have that reciprocated because you're putting out these positive actions. That's really the only thing that matters to me now, not whether or not I'm good enough or they're good enough for me. Are we compatible and nurturing enough for there to be a benefit in our relationship?
So I think language for me has a lot to do with it. Yeah, because you're not going to get rid of all the bad voices in your head. You're never going to get rid of all your bad baggage. You and I are perfect examples of that.
We are so fucked up. It's ridiculous. And yet we strive so hard to find that middle ground where we're not complete egotistical assholes and neither are we wallowing and self-pity because you think we're nothing but trash. So sometimes when we talk, you and I worry that when we say things like, it's a small worry, but I still worry.
I worry when we say things like, if you're not good enough for yourself, you're not going to be any good in a relationship because I feel that too. That where I don't want anyone to think that you have to be 100% evolved and perfect. No, and I said, and I didn't say you're not going to be good in a relationship. I've said you're going to have obstacles in that relationship.
Yeah. When you're trying to do that, lesson it, lesson the amount of bullshit and baggage that is in your own head. I don't think it's possible to get rid of all of it. I think that there are people who have gotten rid of a tremendous amount and I wish I were like them.
But unfortunately, I'm not. But you have done a lot of work. Yes. And you have grown a lot of it.
And you lesson and for someone who is 90% in the shit to now be only 70% in the shit is fucking phenomenal. And I'm very happy about that. But I struggle all the time with this. And those my brain is going to continue to be an asshole for a long time.
I'm not going to get rid of those things before I die. It's just never going to happen. But I love the post. I thought how I love how aggressive she was in telling her friend you are good enough.
Because sometimes your brain is such a fucking asshole that you need to go to the other end of the spectrum and beat it down with a lot of aggression until it gets the fuck out of here because it needs to go in that moment. It's just too much in your head. You're doing it too much. It's at a 90% volume and you need someone louder to shout it down.
Right. And that goes into why it's so crucial to have a support group of people that are friends that not only are just friends but they're friends who are willing to go to that little bit deeper level with you and to see through the shit that's not just on the surface. And so there's people like you and I do it to each other all the time. You know and you'll say are you really this or is this just because you're hurt because of this.
If the more people you have in your life that you can actually be a little bit vulnerable with that know you well enough to call you when your head is not doing you a favor. You know like we did with with Bunny you know and just about the mint chip thing and who's driving the bus and the more you have that support that's why I think support group I just started a new group in therapy. A new DBT instead of CBT. Yeah.
Dialentical. I'll talk about it in the next string tank. But I really think it's important that besides building your relationships if you are somebody that constantly struggles with this am I good enough thing then I think it's also important to have that support group that can call you on it so you're not alone with your head in your relationship thinking you're not. That's right.
Absolutely true. Yes. Thank you Jess. Thank you.
I did it in order. You're in order. I can't believe you're in order. I checked like four times.
I'm like okay. I said that. It's perfect mailbox is I feel like don't get it. Just got me happy.
I'm good enough. Yeah right. That's all you got to do is push the right buttons and I'm good enough for Kathy. Oh my god.
You may sound like an asshole. Well you are. I'm that's true. That's why we get along as all asshole.
Is that why I'm just alone today? No we don't even get along that well. No. What's going on in the chat room?
No. How many people are in the chat room? No. Oh my gosh that's really good.
That's hard. Are they talking about anything dirty? No. Oh wow.
They want to put something in my urethra? What? No. Oh my gosh.
Well you tell them nothing's going in my urethra and not in yours either because that leads to a UTI and we don't want UTIs anymore do we? No. That's right. Thank you.
No. I love her. She's so cute. She's so cute.
This week we have a letter from Lady B who wrote to us and said hello Kathy and Boogie. You don't know me but I have been listening to your podcast for over two years now and I feel like you both are such a part of my life. I started from the first episode and I wanted to wait until I was fully caught up to email you and let you know what a wonderful thing I think you're doing. So she's a P.P.
Zain. She's a Zain zombie apocalypse master. She's listened to everything. That's right.
You've given me a vocabulary for things I've experienced but had no name for and you've made me feel like my desire to prioritize kink in my life is a positive thing to do. So this is a very long email. I love how she started and she's like warning. This is going to be a very long email.
I've been holding back. I've been holding back. I love reading the long emails. Just because I give me an insight into these people.
So she gives a little bit of history here about this great relationship that she's found in kink. It's wonderful and she goes on to say as our relationship developed over the past three years I've been listening to your podcast and learning more and more about kink. So for me it was like our relationship and my body of knowledge about kink was growing in tandem with listening to the podcast. It has been the coolest evolution.
Being in love and with someone who makes me feel safe, secure and cherished is the best feeling in the world. Bravo for you. That's a great one. Very good.
We recently had our first three. Yeah baby. Get her done. And I'm happy to say I can now see myself making a lifetime commitment in part because I know it will never be boring, never be fully monogamous and never be a situation where either of us have to stop exploring.
Anyway, keep doing what you do. And next time in LA I hope to look up threshold and come say hi because you guys are seriously the tits. The tits. What a tits buggy.
We have tits and we are the tits. You know, I've gotten a number of emails about that and I never thought because like when you used to, okay, I'm fucking myself sorry. Don't you come. I like three.
No, probably should. That would be a cool show. At some point I'm like, Kathy, you know, I've been humping the girls for quite a while and they've had lots and I've had none and I'm just dragging these giant balls. Ow.
And I just need to let it go. What was I going to say? You were saying something about it. Listen or you read.
Oh yeah. Yeah, I do panel. I used to do a lot of panels in colleges and talk about Kink Media's M and because it was BDSM, I don't know why but it was always like don't talk so much about Polly because Polly's not necessarily BDSM and on the show I always kind of had that in the back of my mind somehow but we talk a lot about Polly because we're in Polly relationships and these are R types and there's a million types of Polly relationships but we talk about our dynamics on the show and I get so many emails. We get so many emails from people that feel more comfortable about exploring that Polly side and some people have decided to hold back and take more time because of kind of the pitfalls and the things that we've talked about with the Polly.
So even though I never really considered this, you know, a Polly show, it kind of is. Yeah, I'm sorry. It goes one hand in hand with Kink. It does.
It's the in my experience, it's more rare that people aren't Polly. It's not that it's not maybe not well, non-anogamous. They're not as far as play. It's hard not to imagine you're going to be monogamous.
You walk into Kink for the first time. You're going to find your one true love. You are never going to play with anybody else. You're never going to tie anybody else.
You're never going to have sex with anyone else. It's just not that common at very least there's Polly play. Right. That's that's what I was saying.
It's there are a lot of people who are in monogamous sexual relationships but they will do different types of play with other people. If somebody's like somebody's at top and their bottom is a switch and so but they still want to switch and the top isn't going to let them like you know both like my girls you know Bunny has kind of a switchy side so she tops other you know people and and so there's a lot of that but I don't want to give away I don't want to make it like everyone's fucking everyone because that really isn't the case a lot of relationships or at least in our neighborhood. There's a lot of non-anogamous play. Yeah.
But not necessarily not as much. That's true. But there's a lot of ethical non-anogamous on here and that's great and so I love that letter it was very nice thank you lady before writing to us. It's P.P.
Zappepazay! Zappepazay! Zappepazay! Yes we do and I know that you don't understand the podcast audience I know that it's a phenomenon you don't.
After three something years I get it a little bit more the thing that I have come to the conclusion is that we are the ride along for people to go to work. But this is not this this is actually quite common that's what a podcast is boogie. It's not something you can watch. We're just you're just you're not going to be sitting at home sitting in a chair listening to a podcast it's very rare.
I can't even do it like with the headphones you know sitting with you know a glass of juice and you are sipping the juice listening to a recording podcast distinguished somebody looks at you and you're like mmm smoking jacket smoking jacket just you know you're swishing around your cognac or your iced tea. No they while you're exercising while you're driving while you're making dinner while you're cleaning the house you put the fucking earbuds in you gotta have something to listen to while you're jogging while you're running while you're bicycling the amount you need so much stuff to listen to radio doesn't cut it anymore it hasn't for a long time because we don't have commercials let's find a show you can listen to our show without commercials what you've got that weird look on your face like you're thinking of something I don't want to know. Never mind I'm just gonna let it go. Yes let it go.
I was gonna go commercials and I'm like will we ever have commercials I would hope not like I wouldn't like if we like if somebody actually paid us money in the beginning of the show or the end of the show yeah but I just I fucking hate them. I wouldn't like them in the middle like people break down their show I mean I guess if that's what you're going to break or something like people break and maybe I don't know you got to do it you got to do it where you like talk about the product because if not they're just gonna fast forward and the you know we're shooting ourselves in the foot we're basically saying don't give us any fucking money to sell your product. Yeah don't just don't. No do chingles primal hardware send us by the way primal hardware is W.E.R.E.
like werewolf because that's their that you were okay with send us toys. Yeah send us toys we will barter with you for toys we need more dildos we do and I want we you need more deal those no I don't I don't like to those what about to put another people I can bring their own dildo providing the dildo you're in a love lab with dedicated girls here okay that's different yeah we need more dildos we need more girls just need it what we've been talking about don't know we're just the two of us and you you thank you you you are you touching your vagina you good girl muse playing her video game right now yes very good he was incredibly attentive but she always has something to say doesn't she that's good girl I'm gonna be your job we can't even find out what's going on the channel because apparently you can understand her well apparently they're trying to put things in my urethra and talking about dune buggies or something like that have anything that sometimes love is less than nice you may need some fucking advice right now so this one is a very short email that's gonna require a little bit of a little eggshell walking this is from lily who wrote to us and said I am a single teenager and I'm finding out that I really like BDSM I'm new to this whole thing and reading smut and fanfic kind of isn't doing it anymore what should I do well there's a can of fucking worms if ever I heard one you know Kathy what a lot of people are gonna expect a lot of things for me and the people that know me well enough we'll find out what I have I know this is an open show it's a show that is primarily very adult we talk about a lot of very adult mature things so I have a warning on the front and we we talk about adult relationships we talk about adult sexuality and adult kink and then we talk about things that are actually a little extreme on the show and we talk about kink and BDSM and all of the wonders that are this lifestyle always knowing that there is nothing stopping people under whatever the state or country's age of consent is that are also curious about kink and BDSM because the internet is wide open and they have seen these things so that's in the back of your head as somebody I used to work with kids you know when I was a Christian stuff like that so there's still that whole kind of like age appropriate this is right this is wrong whatever but decided gonna do our show we're gonna do our show we're gonna put a warning if if parents aren't able to somehow earn the respect from their children to understand why they shouldn't be on these websites that are for adults I can't really I can't be the parent so we're just gonna do our show that also being said I also understand that children start developing their sexuality much younger than the age of consent whatever is legally and then it comes down to would you like them to get positive information or negative information so when we're addressing something like this where somebody who I'm assuming that because they said teenager because that means they're under the age of consent that I don't have a problem having this conversation I'm not gonna talk about sex I'm not gonna talk about the things that we normally talk about in addressing this I will say there is a lot to learn about this lifestyle and there are a lot of things that are absolutely amazing wonderful you should have no guilt feel no shame in having feelings or desires or thoughts that are sexual your body is absolutely deserving of having an incredible sex life once you get to that point of exploring your sexuality there are amazing YouTube channel like of course Dr. Doe and Sexplanations I just that's where I usually push our younger audience to go because we're talking about some more I'm gonna say advanced things not to lift us up but what we do requires a lot of kind of training and communication and things like that but there are other channels where you can learn a lot of that that all being said that all being said there are some things to watch out for if you are now curious to go beyond from a legal standpoint I am absolutely on board with saying you should wait before exploring these things until you are of the legal age of consent with anyone who is over that age you should not be starting relationships with people that are over whatever your legal age of consent is in your area countries to city state whatever you should also be very cautious of people who are much older than you that are willing knowing your age if you are a minor to mentor you or to give you information or because that may possibly be somebody grooming you in a relationship that can cause a lot of problems that is illegal that can put that person in jail that can put you in all sorts of danger so please be wary of those things Kathy did you want to I got to tell you when it's a loaded question what should I do because let's be honest she's basically asking how can I get my kink on being underage and I can't give that exactly I mean as much as we can water down our answer that's what she's asking for she's asking for what can I do I'm not allowed to go to any clubs or munch's and yet I'm a teenager and I'm kinky and I want to start exploring now I'm not gonna be able to give you a really good answer I really am not because I know that even though I didn't act on my sexual urges until later I had them early on just like we all do 14 years old 13 years old and me you're thinking about that shit and the only reason I never acted on it is because I used to be a very very fearful child right but I often wanted a mentor I often wanted somebody that I could go to as open as my mother was I was no way on this earth I was gonna discuss this shit with her right so this is not an easy question to answer because you and I are both adults legally liable we can't tell her well yeah and yet I can vividly remember what it's like to be under 18 and feel that I have my own brain I can do whatever the fuck I want but there are limits to what I can do I also was was very aware of how much danger I was in to be hurt physically emotionally sexually hurt and as I said being a fearful child I just decided not to venture out until I was much older so I'm not sure how much solace we're gonna be able to give Lily because we're not gonna give her an answer that's gonna say do A, B and C but I mean you went through this you know when she was a minor when she was still a minor and she was obviously interested in this far before she turned 18 which is the legal age of consent in California long before that she was curious and so she spent her time online getting all the information that she could which whether you are a minor or legal adult is what we're gonna tell you to do we're gonna tell you to get as much information as you can about these not only these activities but these types of relationships this type of negotiation and interaction that you're going to have the things to expect the pitfalls these dangers other than the legal age the dangers of poorly sought after BDSM are the same whether you're an adult or a minor this is true and I believe that what you the stuff you just mentioned is very important so Lily if you're listening to this and all you heard was some fucking adult telling you just read about it and educate yourself don't make the mistake of thinking that that is bullshit advice that anybody could give you because I'm gonna tell you this as a young female you are highly susceptible to predators out there especially in a fringe group like kink people who are going to come in and take advantage of you especially if you are a submissive or a bottom who it is in the nature of a submissive or bottom to take advice and help and mentoring from the top it doesn't mean you are stupid exactly nothing means stupid if I've said this before if my mechanic told me hey man inside your brake system there's a small garden home and it's starving and it magically stops your car when when the tires are spinning and he's just hungry so that's why your car's not breaking I would almost have to just believe him because I don't know shit about fixing cars right so that's called ignorance there's a difference between ignorance and stupidity stupidity means you get facts and information and then choose to ignore them because you somehow in your head have a better answer that this is gonna work even though you have information to the contrary that's stupidity so nobody's calling anybody stupid but it is a fact when you are there's an attraction towards younger women both my women are both legal age and start with that and I did not start seeing them until they were well I mean it's 20 they were both 20 when I started with both of them but go ahead but yeah it's it isn't that's how you learn is you're gonna get information from other people and you're gonna try and pull it apart and see how much of it you believe in and how much of it you don't so when you're in that vulnerable position you want to be first of all you want to arm yourself with information and I've said this before but I have no problem saying it again it's something that boogie says in our orientations twice every month you need to find out both the skills that a submissive needs and that a dominant needs no matter which side of the slash that you are on because if you're gonna put your hands if you're a bottom you're gonna put your hands in the into a tops expertise and they're gonna start flogging you or spanking you or tying you up you better know just to take care of yourself how to tie how to spank how to flog properly because then you're armed with information and you can tell that person you can say oh my god this guy's in need he doesn't know what he's doing or this woman doesn't know how to tie it all because I happen to know that you're not supposed to tie in the joint you're supposed to tie in the you know and and so arming yourself with information is giving you the the minimum of what you need to protect yourself when you are already in a vulnerable state learning sexuality matter your age when you're learning you know and all of a sudden you know things and the the supposed a dominant is telling you because it's like that's an easy question to ask oh you want to tie me up in this hotel room and and whatever so what type of bondage to use what are your safety measures how what types of knots do you tie do you tie knots or do not tie knots what's you know what then all of a sudden you make somebody who's predatory very uncomfortable because you show that they don't know what the fuck they're doing so whether whether you are a minor or a legal adult it really doesn't matter the more information you arm yourself and if you are under age or a legal adult you should not proceed with this type of activity alone you should have some support you should have some friends that understand what you're doing so you can still just like anything else have a safe call have somebody know where you're going if you're going to try things with somebody know what you're going to try have that person that you're going to try things with understand that you have a team of people that are waiting for your calls exactly that's I'm sorry I didn't go ahead that's another excellent bit of advice to have people in your camp who are going to help you is absolutely necessary and I'm going to just say I today found out from a friend of a friend that they know somebody who is going through something really tough we're talking about a young adult maybe 2223 who got involved in a in a relationship with some guy that she met at work good looking guy she's a good looking girl they started having sex they were having a fabulous time he was pushing her too far into the kink she wasn't comfortable she backed away he kept coming after her after she's explicitly said this is too much for me I want to stop this relationship he wouldn't stop bothering her in texts and phone calls seeing her at work it was hard to avoid him she kept it to herself she didn't tell anyone even though she's working in a place where there's a union she has a union rep she could have gone to that person she didn't because she felt that she was at fault she didn't have anybody to talk to about this to to say you know just like Jess on the rock said your brain is an asshole I'm your friend I'm going to talk this talk you out of this frame of mind if she had had had somebody to talk to she would have been able to fix the situation less than it instead she didn't and it has escalated to the point where now she has to get a restraining order and it's gone pretty bad because the guy still won't leave her all right so it as book he says this is not about calling someone stupid because they're underage this happens throughout your entire life having people there that you can talk to as a sounding board to take that voice out of your head and say it out loud and have someone else say look I know you're hearing this voice in your head but I gotta tell you how it sounded to me and you're right it's not just that safe calls people hey if you feel that you want to feel even this safe it's perfectly okay to have someone come over to your place or you go over them with your friend that is not out of the question that is not hey I want to meet someone who told them I think it's a really stupid thing but if you want to do it have your friend come and sit in the fucking car and wait until you're done I mean I don't meet someone at the police station and leave one car at the police station yeah and this is an advice just for ridiculous this is an advice that we're getting underage people right this is advice that is general that anybody should take so lily I hope we helped I don't know if we did we may have fucked you up even more probably not explanations don't listen to dr doe there's there's just a lot of information but I'm glad we dealt with this and I want our audience that may or may not supposed to be here because I don't like the fact I mean we're a lot more adult but I really don't like the fact that we're somehow bad for talking about these things and pretending that people under age um aren't thinking about it because that's dangerous yeah it's very dangerous now I understand age appropriate I've made no comments I've made no jokes I specifically that's what everyone expects from it very good but very good but it really is important maybe not with perverted podcast as much because we are more adult and extreme but definitely I think it is so important for children to not be shamed for having desires that are 100% biological and natural and the more shitty information and the more guilt and shame you put on someone who is young about their sexuality while they're young they're going to turn out it's going to manifest into shitty relationships shitty behaviors and possibly even turn them into abusers or people that are easily abused absolutely motherfucking drop the mic god damn it and that is our show thank you for providing this perverted playground press recording if you're in the los angeles surrounding area visit threshold.org find out about joining their kinky family I'd like to say thank you to everyone in the love lab tonight but we understand you thank you new thank you boogie thank you to everybody who gave us permission to talk about their post if you have questions comments or ideas either email us at pervertedpodcast.com or visit pervertedpodcast.com and finally I have nothing to say at the end of the show but here's gonna be a song and we will see you next week for show 168 this car is a god to me me and my whole damn family living out the redneck American dream drinking like beer and screaming at the tv oh yeah it's a simple ride in the trailer it's hard to get laid people make fun of how we keep it in the family but coos is cute and she's staring at me she's a little young now but one day she'll be 18 oh yeah it's a simple ride it's a simple wonderful life sitting around the bugs having fun on Friday night it's all right getting drunk and watching all the little buggies ride it's a simple life we're laughing at the sea folks running like a squirrel on a treadmill cell phone email at the end of this race we're both gonna die die die so you might as well have a simple little life run get her done grandma got her food stamps herade deep-rod twinkies are a meal before king daddy shot a possum today grandpa said cook it and mama said no way oh yeah it's a simple ride well it's a simple wonderful life we only want we only want simple life and we only want a simple life getting the truck cans we're going to Walmart