168: Buddhist Wisdom for Marriage, Conflict, and Lasting Love with Devon Hase

A conversation on deep listening, dukkha, vulnerability, acceptance, and using relationship as spiritual practice.In this episode of The Midlife Spirituality Project, I’m joined by Devon Hase, co-author of This Messy, Gorgeous Love: A Buddhist Guide to Lasting Partnership.This conversation explores what Buddhist wisdom can teach us about love, marriage, conflict, and the very human messiness of being in close relationship with another person. Devon shares why difficulty in partnership does not mean something is wrong, how the Buddhist concept of dukkha can help us normalize the “bumpy ride” of love, and why our closest relationships often become some of our greatest opportunities for spiritual growth.We also talk about deep listening — to ourselves, to our partner, and to the relationship itself — and how this practice can help us move from projection and criticism toward curiosity, compassion, and connection.Devon and I also discuss vulnerability, codependency, attachment, the middle way, accepting our partners as they are while still honoring our own needs, and the importance of deliberately practicing joy and appreciation in long-term relationships.In This Episode, We Talk AboutWhy relationships can feel especially complicated in midlifeThe Buddhist concept of dukkha and why love can feel like a “bumpy ride”Deep listening as a practice for ourselves, our partners, and the relationshipHow meditation helps us see our projections more clearlyRelationship as a path of spiritual growthAccepting your partner while still naming your needsCodependency, attachment, autonomy, and connectionThe Buddhist “middle way” in partnershipVulnerability, boundaries, and “having no skin” with the people closest to usPracticing joy, appreciation, and tech-free connectionConnect With Devon & Nicowww.devonandnicohase.comIG: @devonandnicohase.comBuy The Book: This Messy, Gorgeous LoveAbout Katie FarinasKatie Farinas is a midlife coach, yoga teacher, and spiritual guide who helps women navigate midlife with clarity, peace, purpose, and empowerment. Through yoga philosophy, mindfulness, nervous system regulation, and energy-based practices, Katie supports women in reconnecting with themselves and stepping fully into their most aligned and authentic lives.✨ Ways To Go Deeper:If you’re ready to feel less overwhelmed and more connected to your body, needs, and inner voice, explore my 4-week private coaching experience for midlife women: Reconnect With Your Body and Yourself. Learn more here.Record your question here and I will answer it on the show!! https://www.speakpipe.com/KatieFarinasJoin the Monthly Satsang. A space to reflect and grow together in community.Visit Katie’s website to see all her services.Join the newsletter for soulful insights and to receive weekly practicesRead and watch on SubstackBook a reflective Insight Seat to come on the show and receive live coachingSchedule a Clarity Call to see if my coaching is right for you.🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube: