17. How Am I Supposed to Know How to Truly Parent?

Parenting can feel like you’re expected to know how to do something you’ve never done before — and then do it differently for each child.In this week’s Know Your Children, Rav Shlomo Katz and the women of Shirat David go deeper into a core yesod: investing in a child’s emotional development isn’t a “nice extra” — it’s essential. We talk about the pressure parents feel, the fear of “getting it wrong,” and why failure is often the only real way we learn (“ein habayshan lamed / אין הביישן למד”).From there, we move into practical, real-life tools: upgrading the quality of conversations as kids get older, creating daily emotional check-ins, and integrating a child’s emotional world into normal home life (not only reacting when something goes wrong). Along the way: a powerful “good questions” chinuch story, humility in parenting, and a big reminder that self-care and emotional health in the parent is often a prerequisite to building it in the child.----------For more Shuirim and Music from Rav Shlomo Katz, visit: https://ravshlomokatz.comJoin Rav Shlomo Katz's WhatsApp Community: https://chat.whatsapp.com/KHKOhhPaeHx5Kb74WL9L9a?mode=ems_copy_tCHAPTERS00:00 Opening and Sponsorship Acknowledgments 01:29 Emotional Development Is a Must 03:52 Physical Growth vs Emotional Needs 05:52 Parents’ Self-Criticism and Growth 08:51 Learning Through Failure (Ein Habayshan Lamed) 10:38 Humility in Parenting 11:44 Divine Intent in Parenting 13:10 Practical Steps for Emotional Investment 18:05 Age-Specific Emotional Strategies 22:51 Recording Device Test for Family Talk 25:35 Daily Parent-Child Check-In: “How Was Your Day?” 26:38 The “Good Questions” Lesson from Isadore Rabi 28:39 Integrating a Child’s Emotional World into Daily Life 31:14 Limits of the Chinuch Obligation After Bar/Bat Mitzvah 35:15 Hebrew Mistake Story: Accordion vs. Playing 37:36 Making Emotional Talk a Regular Part of Home Life 43:03 Parent Self-Care as Prerequisite for Child’s Emotional Health