We're gonna have to do a disclaimer in this podcast. We use adult language and talk about adult situations and admit the bad things happen at our college We admit all kinds of sexual assault. We call lots of people bad names Probably don't have your kids around unless you want to teach them about how their bodies are own But maybe do like a pre Amanda I have a girl. How you doing?
I'm all right. I hear you're sick. Yeah, I'm very sick I don't want to talk about it too much. I think I'm dying.
I do think you're dying of dysentery I made some good like on the organ trail. I made some good organ trail jokes on my Instagram post about it today Oh, did you oh, I didn't realize you were gathering sympathy on all media forms every front kind of a full force attack I need to know that I thought of when I'm not around and Where did you get the response that you were asking after shaded me because I? I made a joke about how much how many pounds of meat you could carry home in the organ trail And she said everyone knows wild berries are the answer not what not more meat not everyone knows that we smart people know that Well, I don't know if knowing organ trail means you're a smart person it does Maybe spend a lot of time to library when you were a young child Playing the game. Yeah, I played it my friend actually At school well the library was my school.
That's true The library is gonna be my home soon when I'm on the road and some co-working space is exactly Some world wide web Well, you and all the homeless people in my brain every single city. I'm hoping that maybe I could get some sushi Oh, wow, well, we know it's certain Libraries they do pre-sushi making indeed. I have some corrections for you. Oh, that came swiftly I have to switch sort of corrections justice.
I feel it's shiny blade on my throat now So last week we talked about the 51st state did we yes now? I'm denying everything I don't know anything about the 51st state So I was talking about the state of Jefferson right all themselves with the first date and you said no the 51st state is Guam Everybody knows that and I said aren't isn't it Puerto Rico? Uh-huh and then we went back and forth for several minutes sure everyone loves a debate During which both of us were like I think it's this I think it's this and what happened? We had no reception in the parking structure target so we got intended So we resolved nothing So we didn't have any reception and so we just moved on the way a good podcast yes with late swiftly ten minutes into What a special about something you could wake up media within moments, but we could do neither sure move on But as I do while I'm editing the podcast I look up the various things we discussed mm-hmm to back check our Musings music that's sweet And it was a rambling disguise as facts, but yeah, but it was a bit of a history history.
Oh, right? I'm intrigued tell me more so I was right. Oh, I see where this is going Protection this quarter always seems to crop up when one of our hosts gets the right answer sometimes I'll talk about when I know I so what do you learn about the 51st state? Okay?
So Puerto Rico is Puerto Rico is like the front runner for the next day Hood and that's who you were talking about when you said there was a delegate and a referendum and whatever but the beaches aren't even that nice Does anyone been there lately? I don't what do you think statehood is number of beaches divided by population? Yeah? Montana not a state.
I was like what about Nebraska out? Anyway, I also was watching the West Wing this weekend because And I had to box up 500 presents sure like Santa's workshop And so I had on West Wing season two and there's episode where they talk about Puerto Rico statehood and I knew instantly that that is where you Had gotten all your information like the way they know I got my information from watching the convention and Guam being a delegate being like blah blah blah the 51st state So Guam is in this list isn't it like second? No, it's what DC is second. No, that's not real.
It's complicated There's a really long Wikipedia well Washington DC is often mentioned as a candidate for statehood James Madison considered the implications of the definition of seat of government found in the Constitution and he was like We need a place that's outside outside of state to do the thing but it was kind of left open So it's very taxation without representation. Oh, that's their whole license plate frame, right? But it's ironic. Yeah, no, I think I don't Don't think it's a joke on purpose.
Oh, okay, because no text. I'm not about it. Yeah So no text without representation was the motto of the Revolutionary War. I know so we were mad at written right?
So then people are saying the same thing about DC. Yeah, but it's on DC plates I know because it's like yeah, America, but it's oh, I see I thought it was everyone in DC being like give us a state No, it's on the plates because it's like the the theme of America But it's ironic because it's on the DC plates where they literally don't have representation See I think I got it right that time I think you did if not I'm not sure next week tell me to look forward to someone right in because we're tired of just guessing and talking also I can't we're not tired of that. I like Dewaltant to knowing absolutely nothing. No, I think Puerto Rico's, you know put in their time.
Oh, okay, and we take their money Oh, yeah, I think it's weird that we have a good story. I think it's where we have any it seems very like we're kind of He with England in like the 1800s or something. Yeah, where's our flats where's our colonies? Where's our princes?
Yeah, where's our princes is a good one man I saw a video of William and Kate and Harry giving a speech about something like helping children or some charity And I was hairy mainly talking about it and he was doing such a good job And I felt so proud of him and I was just like, oh man, you're doing great. That was we believe in your hairy Yeah, I think he has stopped that at this point now, but he's 30 I like to think okay. I had two thoughts about it I was like man Kate has been such a good influence on both of them You know like cuz I think it's someone their age they can hang out with and be cool with you know like a friend Both Harry and William to like calm Harry down a bit and then also draw William out of a shell perhaps and then I thought a crazy thing I was like what if Harry and Kate were in love somehow or something horrible happened They fell in love I love that you have created a friendship for them in your head They know there's so many more videos of them all hate like the three of them So take it away go on trips all the time all over the place Well, they have to I know that like they didn't have real like close friends with their royalty before so now They have someone else who's royalty is it are you saying it's Harry or Hermione in your bit of a age? Shipper no, I haven't thought about that But they do look like them they do Kind of a lot there's it when when Kate went to the Harry Potter studio tour At least in studio outside of London highly recommend it's my favorite of all the Harry Potter experiences I've done She when she went to the opening there's a picture of her like flicking her wand And someone posted it on my case book and said that when they first saw the picture They thought it was me did you die I died I would die I was I was like this is the best compliment I've ever received I might have already shared the story on the podcast.
I don't think so, but if so it's so great We should share it. I know always I'm Kate at the Harry Potter studio chair Such a dream with my beautiful like it was my hair my hair in the picture and I was like Kate's perfect hair You thought was mine so excited so we're finally 29 or like last they're always posting clickbait stories about Princess Kate's beauty routine And I cannot click fast enough my computer catches on fire and yeah, no, I've I've I read all about her smoothie kick Yeah Such a kick, you know again. I feel like we've had this conversation on the podcast. Yeah our sub podcast British royalty princess Kate princess Kate forever Yeah, no, we definitely just like we're we talked about princess Kate and we talked about the royal website, right?
Oh, yeah The tabloid blog right? Yeah, that like has everything about everything about the Swedish royalty. Yeah, this is all coming back to be a Moving on Someone at work shared billboard rage with me. Wait because of our segment.
Yeah He said I've only listened Bush. He's like I've only listened to half of the episode And I was like that's a lot more than most people you've done good work son I understand if you can't go on and he said billboard rage now explain it to me again And he seemed to look at you but then he was talking about a billboard that made him angry man people can confuse fire segments worries me Does this not translate? I don't think it does dude. Are you in any way?
Can you argue? Because about that yeah, well, I'm like billboard rage. It's a rage about billboards. Yeah, but when I said that he seemed Yeah, he was like oh, I've got I have some billboard.
Yeah, right? So it's like the concept itself exists in the world. Yeah, I'm like Doing it. I just feel like you only have to listen to this rant about boards for like a second and you get what it is And yet so much of that episode was dedicated to ranting.
I know what we do a lot of ranting Speaking of yes I want to talk about assault because our friend Donald Trump is here our friend did some locker room talk He's a friend and no one so Donald Trump a friend to no one Wait, what happened? No, I don't remember. Oh my god. Okay, so 10 years ago He and Billy Bush were talking Billy Bush who was went back when I used twitter one of the first people I followed Oh, wow, because he was one of the only like celebrities using I used to really like I remember yeah Um, so how wrong I was well, I don't know.
I mean, I mean, he's just a douchebag sure everyone else I know I feel like it's just a matter of time for everyone's incredibly terrible behavior will come to light Right, it's true And I feel like that's how it's been for a while I was trying to explain this to another coworker of mine where I was like yeah No, no matter who you love they've done something horrible that you will find out what about you know relatively soon in your life And then you want to be able to like everything they've done ever again it's hard It's a completely difficult word situation find yourself in because there used to be so much less information about people So if someone does something bad it would have to be like really bad and then you'd be like, oh, of course I'm not gonna watch any more woody-allen movies blah blah blah, you know, but now it's like oh no everyone That's why they say like your faves are problematic like everyone you love is not the mean terrible This is your faves are probably like a Twitter time being Alex I like instantly know as soon as I start asking the question that I'd be an Alex. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what's this? What's uh your faves are problematic? I was listening to this podcast industry podcast And they were talking about gimlet and the drama.
Oh, yeah But they like don't They don't know that much about like consumer facing podcasts So they were saying that they were talking about drama and like Definitely had a outside perspective on it. I was like what you guys have a red though a bread it threads Red and mobile has made reddit accessible to me. Yeah, no, it's not nice now the reddit website I still find ways to nerdy for my like consumption abilities. It's like a mobile thing.
It's just like Well, it's like reading a text read with my friends Anyway, they were saying that they were talking about the role of gimlet If you're a fan of a game podcast do you care about gimlet and they were saying no because it's consumer facing So it's like if you like the walking dead like your fan of walking dead You don't care what that work is maybe like a certain tier But there's probably like three tiers of yours. I want to be like I want to be like accept people watch walking dead People who will watch like who like walking dead and then go to the next year Which is like I'll watch any show that amse because I trust them they do good shows and then people were like I'll only watch amse shows. They're the best like crazy fans cbs comedy. Yeah Sure Two and a half men keep going you're so good Other shows mike and molly big bang theory.
Yeah, but that one's like so big bang. There's lots of big bang fans But they don't like cbs or chocolate Um So they were saying that and they were saying like this, you know, when you're like you listen to reply Oh, you're not like oh one of their gimlets are there and i'm like gimlet started with a show about gimlet So I think unlike maybe other networks whether podcast or other wise like they do have a fan base That's about gimlet because Alex has made himself a character in the narrative of podcasting sure and there's oh, oh I bet you don't know about this yet. Zach rap is playing him in a tv show about gimlet. What?
Yeah Why are they making a tv show? Oh, they make a show about a tv show. Mm-hmm And Zach's gonna play Alex. Yeah, I can do that So i'm down special treat for you.
Oh, that is no that's but I do love me some Braffy tv shows. Yeah some braffy uh, mess out in the world for wrapping around Braffet around Anyway, Billy Bush, Donald Trump, Billy Bush and Donald Trump. Um, we're filming a tv show of some sort on a brax's hollywood Who knows why? Yes, I can tell you what it was.
Okay, go ahead The um Access Hollywood Which is one of those dumb diggaly celebrity news shows that can't possibly have a market anymore because of the internet But somehow this was you know 10 years ago Um Trump was popular because the apprentice and he was going to have This was typical mbc crossover magic. So he was gonna have a guest star spot on days of our lives, which is the nbc soke and so Access Hollywood was like filming Trump doing his His segment and so this was like a day in the life of like Donald Trump being on days of our lives And then he and Billy were talking when the cameras weren't rolling but the microphones were still on which is always sure always I worked in events you always had your microphone on yeah, and you like I mean it's awkward you hear people go to the bathroom and stuff Right, like we had that at the theater when I was doing community theater. Yeah, like we hear people all the time doing everything Yeah Um and the two of them engaged in some unpleasant conversation about uh Donald Trump said something about how he approaches married women or women Just love him. He's like he's specifically reference Nancy O'Dell who was the co-host of actually Hollywood And he was basically saying to Billy like oh, yeah, I tried to like hook up with her And he describes assaulting her that he like tried to kiss her He tried to make it happen He tried to like go all the way or like he like just like lewd references to clearly Assault sure because she he even says like she wouldn't go for it.
She was married Yeah And then it devolves into like what he then later described as locker room talk Where he's like show boating about how he does this to a lot lots of people Um that he like because he's a celebrity you can catch kiss whoever you want Yeah, and then he says you can grab women by the pussy Yes And I actually had only read the quotes. I didn't watch the video until like a couple days ago Um and it was even more like jarring. Yeah, like watching it specifically was just like I don't know I think I'm kind of like Dis um, what's the word perspective? No Disensitized, uh, desensitized Same syllable to be like I think I like I become desensitized to Donald Trump's heinous remarks Sure, um one I never watch in general any footage Um of any news for that matter.
Um, I read all of my news And I mean I've even like I've never seen um the news footage of the twin towers Yeah Because like and that's like one of the first times I can remember actively avoiding footage in just reading Uh because I just get to like I'm highly sensitive. Um Yeah stuff like that stays with me for a really long time. So I can't watch like crying murder shows like criminal minds or anything like that So yeah, this was one of the so I'm like I'm used to reading like oh here's the crazy thing. He said today Oh here's the crazy thing.
He said today. Oh, here's the first time I counted this weird speech he gave in like weird ass Pennsylvania You know and so I read the comments and I was like I read like the remarks and I was like yeah sure And then when I watched the actual footage which isn't like a tweet right or a crazy remark in a speech It's like no, it's someone who thinks they're not a conversation Um and what someone who's like sort of laughing and like going along with it Right. So yeah, and then so this gets released right and there's like Finally some level of outrage some level of outrage from people who have been supporters Like I mean even like quite a bit of the oh yeah, I mean I'm not amazed at people I'm not here to like try to make sense of trump supporters No, it's hard to follow that. I want to talk about ladies.
Sure. Always and respecting them. Oh, that's why I right um And So yeah, he like and then he's gone on to defend it and minimize it. Yeah, so he says oh Like it's just locker room talk.
This is how guys talk and no one else is around like we don't actually assault women And then like since then all of these other women have come forward with stories about him trying to kiss him kiss them And something really amazing happened too. I think there's this prominent film critic named Devin Frouci who had a lot of enemies Um in general, he's kind of an abrasive guy, but he had a podcast on your wolf called the cannon He was kind of like well respected well, well, well And he was the lead editor of um or the main editor of birth movies death Which is this giant film block So he was tweeting about the locker room talk blah blah blah and this woman tweeted at him and said was he tweeting in what manner Like being like this is the kind of man like this is a terrible man. I can't believe he would do these things He's very anti-tromb. Uh-huh So he was like this is like how can like a person would say these things blah blah blah Or there's some of do these things he's not just saying he's done it and all this stuff And then so much we did on him and said this is so strange Do you remember doing this to me and grabbing me by the pussy 10 years ago when we were out with our friends at a bar Someone knows and um she was like yeah You you slid your hand down my pants and then you pull it out and asked everyone to smell it and in front of this huge bar and embarrass me horribly And it was very invasive and he was like I don't remember this at all Like I say I'm sorry that was so vile blah blah and then he stopped tweeting and it like blew up because everyone who ever had a problem with him Or anything like jumped on it, which is the wrong thing I think like that's not like if you have a personal problem with someone that's not like the moment to Air that but everyone's like see blah blah blah blah Well, yeah, if you're area problem with someone just to get attention Like that's not the point of well a lot of people were like Devin finally gets his come come up in or whatever blah blah blah blah for like because they had his He had a reputation of being kind of a jerk or like getting into fights with people and all this stuff So a lot of people like kind of used it to be like see never could trust this person So anyway, so it turns out that he lost like his job at both the podcast and he was immediately removed as the editor Like it that was it and no more and basically all I want to see to finish that story I'll briefly is that there was like two other people that also kind of like everyone was like I've been too scared to say anything until now, but this person also not for him Oh, you mean besides Trump other no besides for actually like other people were like Here's two other people in the film community that also I've had an issue with and I've been too scared to say anything So it was like kind of this oh okay like now if we're telling our story That's like you're not the only one like you there's just happened to a lot of people and yeah, which is why I think it's important to share stories And But I also understand why survivors don't oh absolutely and I mean like I mean I can't like you have a story sorry I do have a story About someone we went to college with yes That I have debated whether or not I should contact him to talk about this since this all came up and I kind of forgot about it for a long time So yeah, so you were you were assaulted.
Yes out of party. I was close friends. Yes very close friends My closest friends. Yeah, they were not there when it happened because that person made sure that no one was around when it happened Yeah, well, yeah, I mean we were young and there were many things I feel like that happened at those parties Yeah, lots of things which and I'm like if you like if you're an naive group of responsible kids like us Which we all were I mean why I was like 23 you were a little bit younger.
It's not like we were 16 I was trying to piece together the timeline when this happened and I think I was 20 when I happened but I don't know So you can only imagine what's happening with younger people We didn't start we didn't start hurting like this till we were In our 20s and we like I think I mean I know of a friend who was hit By her boyfriend yeah at one of those parties again in private. I like at one of those parties felt Maybe like I was like molested in a very like subtle sort of way No, it's always subtle like for the most part that the being hit thing. Yeah, that's right not so subtle But you know, I never I never felt like I never felt like my experience was sexual assault But I think maybe like that's like that tends to be part of the problem with the narrative is this minimizing Minimizing but then also the immediate thought like well, I wasn't raped in the conventional sense So I don't get to like have that guilt or I don't get to like take on that like I have a story Yeah, you know, I mean that's the thing I tried to say to someone else who was trying to defend Trump's comments I actually got in a Facebook fight of course and man Like all I like I really there's so many things I want to post about stability even in Facebook But I actually don't have the emotional energy to deal to actually have a discussion about it on Facebook I'd be more than happy to sit down with anyone one-on-one and have a conversation about political issues or otherwise But you have to frame it correctly on Facebook Yeah, I just like it's really important to me to like use a public platform because Facebook is a little platform to put like the best Like my best representation the best representation of the facts the best representation of my faith Like they're I feel this like a mince pressure And also like I just don't have the emotional energy to respond and so it kind of like I sometimes feel Like sent it or like cut off that I like I'm like, oh, I like I want to This would be everything I have to do this right? I think about that a lot like I'm more than I have like I'm like Like I guess I get spent three hours a day on Facebook and then I have to be asleep the rest of the time Yeah, the cats on me So I tried to say this to someone who was minimizing it's like, oh, then I guess you know, no one can say anything It was just some banter and I was like, no every every woman you know has a story that maybe doesn't add up to like full-on Rape, but everyone has many stories at times that like things happen to them that don't quite make sense They can't quite account for they can't quite like they know it's wrong But they don't know how to like say it or to talk about it or you know, I mean everyone has many stories Yes, and that's like only more coming to light now.
I think and I think like it's I think every year It becomes more acceptable to talk about it. Yes In the in the general sense, you know, each person has their own journey and like you think about Cosby And how many how many victims and survivors like there are And how long they felt yeah change our silence or whatever and Yeah, maybe it is status quo, but it's shitty and fucked up and I mean it like I think what's so fascinating about kind of the drama I was kind of surprised at how many people are outraged because I was like, oh, yeah, no, some people are total decks pun intended Um, no, it's just the way the world is like, oh, we're getting mad about it now. Yeah, I mean great Finally, but I mean it is surprising because every other time someone is trying to tell a story about this or talk about it It's like, oh, you're making a big deal out of it. That's just what happened.
Well, and I think like I mean There's this new documentary to an ethics called adrian daisy. It's like about this very thing That's about these girls that were in high school like 16 when these horrible things happen to them and pictures were taken and people knew all about it It was this horrible like they almost died. They were like blood poison Obviously and the stories are just insane and I was like I feel so and that's what I can tell people I was like no, I've always felt lucky that I was never sexually assaulted quote-unquote like I've always been like man That's amazing that I'm not one of the one in four women that's a statistic Right and yet when you look back with like a slightly different lens. It's like oh no I've been harassed assaulted like I've been all of those things.
Yeah, I've just never been like raped in the very very yeah Or me like and I think sometimes like I mean there's really awful ways to be raped and then there's really quote normal ways to rape Yes, and I think for those of us that have a lot of fairly privileged privilege life as it is It really does feel like the assault that we've experienced in a harassment we've experienced isn't like It's not fair to yeah Yeah, because it feels like we're trying like poster child like I have a story well, I mean I do but it's not like some effort stories are just horrible You know and so it's hard to be like my experience matters too in the light of someone You know this girl having a blood outcome of 134 and passing out being like gangbank by five guys Like you know 16 year olds like no, that's like a horrible thing that happened to you like that my experience is not that bad and there's and there's and I mean people um Are affected by trauma in different ways and have different thresholds of trauma and and so like what I'm learning And I mean I talk about trauma a lot in therapy and like My own sort of embarrassment or whatever about different kinds of assault and it really is really difficult to talk about even in a situation Where I'm with someone who like is the safest person right exactly and it still feels like I haven't told john about most of you It's just it's still I can't I can't claim us. I can't leave this way early. I wasn't right. You don't deserve to talk about it Um Yeah, no, I mean like earlier this week when we were talking about the party situation You're you're assault right when you were assaulted Hang on.
Let's read book. More wine is needed more wine is needed when we talk about heavy things That's that's a new segment jingle. I told this to be a segment. It's too sad Anyway, so like john had had said something like oh, can you believe all this talk about you know Trump and whatever?
I'm texting I was like yeah, I was trying to think about the you know the time that that happened to me and I think I was like 20 And he's like what are you talking about? I'm like oh yeah, and I'm like this happened to me and I was grabbed by my pussy Right and I totally forgot about it. Yeah, so But yeah, we were at this party and I was rather drunk and we were sitting on the front porch and I was sitting with a bunch of friends and Then everyone else went inside and it was just the two of us and we were kind of like I was fairly drunk I don't know how drunk he was I assume rather drunk probably like I'm not trying to defend No, but I mean anyone who who does Um assault another person, but I feel like often yeah people are very sure many great And I tried to remember what we were talking about beforehand because I just remember like feeling afterwards Like I couldn't talk about it because I somehow like of course brought it on myself Yeah, you're trying to figure out like what like where were those signs leading up to this? Sure, and I mean we were kind of flirting and kind of like chit chatting and a flirty way and um We were I think we were talking about like sexual preference or something of the sort and He Was like, well, do you like this and touched like the top of me and then he was like or this I'm like stuck his finger I mean I was like oh and like pushed his hand away and I was like uh like not and I don't remember what happened Like I know nothing more happened about it.
I don't remember what I said next I don't remember like anything else about the interaction except being like oh That is weird, but I don't like maybe that's okay. I don't know I don't know what I don't think I should tell I'm not gonna tell you what about this for a while. I don't like I didn't have I was very drunk I don't remember what I thought but I was just like oh shit like that's not what I intended to have happened at that moment in any way So that was a weird thing and then I don't know that I don't know that I don't remember telling you about it Like do you remember me telling you about that or do you remember like anyone talking? I remember you telling me but probably not for years like you didn't tell me like That no even though I think you were there like I think maybe yeah, like I think about you.
But you were there Yeah, I mean I couldn't tell you I mean neither of us which party was I mean there was like a good six-month period where we were At that one house with that group of people getting super drunk right and I still super drunk for our age I mean I feel like we had a crew with three ciders. I don't know like no one was black out drunk and right I mean like it was during that era that I was black out drunk like the one time I've been black out drunk in my life um but like We were young and new to drinking and I feel like we look out for each other though. Yeah. No, we did everyone was careful like I'm always congratulating myself I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I feel like everyone still was very much like it's so great that we have this great group that we can do these things together Yeah, exactly and that's what I'm saying.
It's like it's not like oh look at the you know look how you can't believe in anything No, I'm saying if this is what's happening in a like officially safe place like I know like that same house I know babysit at once a week like it like it's in there Like it is our community like and so if that kind of stuff is happening to us in those situations I know I still I still like I can't even imagine what this person like I can't imagine what's happening else No, I like we're still Facebook friends like I still uh, you know comment on their posts now and then and I've debated whether or not I should even bring this up with them Because what would you like why do you want to because I want you want to know that because we were not even jerky notes it happens, right? Given his behavior in other situations. I feel like it's predatory enough that he probably knows that he did this thing Okay, given what I know if his other other things that have happened, okay, so like okay, so I want him to know that I remember Okay, and that you want him to know that you know you were assaulted right? Yeah, yeah, like that he didn't quote get away with it Yeah, no It would be like a sexual experience and I think like I think that's a totally fair desire And I think like it would be very brave of you to seek out that Resolution I don't even know if resolution is right word, but like, you know, and I don't even know what that looks like I don't know what looks like setting me up.
That's like hey, remember that time that you assaulted me? Yeah, like well, just like hey, no, no, it's not even a question right? You're just like hey It's important to me to make sure that you know that you assaulted me back in you know 2005 or whatever it was right and The reason I hesitated now that I've like thought of this idea of doing it is I've seen what happens to other people who try and you know In front in some way these people that do things to them and They are victim blamed and they are ashamed and all of these things I'm like I don't know that I can handle someone being like that didn't happen Right you wanted it like whatever it is that I can imagine him saying which I can very easily imagine saying that it was none of that was consensual You asked like I don't know and yeah, no like it's yeah, no Which is why which is why it would be a like super brave thing to do it and also we don't have to do the brave thing Because the other alternative is oh, I have to take care of myself And maybe taking care of myself is meaning quiet about myself or whatever, you know, like and that's like I totally understand why survivors Do that too when it was coming to light about a couple different other people in the film critic circle I messaged a couple of people privately and was like hey, I know who you're talking about it Something happened to be to with this person which is a different person in a different situation And I was like I'm too scared still to talk about what happened you messaged with people about about that other person Like about the incident because they were like oh you had had a salt incidents or you had I had a shady incident Yeah, like a harassment like you felt uncomfortable harassment. I would say definitely harassment You felt like you felt like there's a situation in which you chose to escape because you were afraid that it was going to Um, I didn't escape fast enough, but yes, I wish I had so Um, but in the end, yes, I messaged these people and I was like hey, this is my story I'm so glad you were able to share your story I'm not able to share my story because I'm still afraid But thank you for speaking up and I know what you're going through and I know like it did happen like you know Because something somewhat happened to me and they were like, you know what support comes in many different ways And it doesn't mean you have to speak publicly to lend support I'm sure everything was almost like I'm so sorry that happened to you Um, you were heard you were saying like so affirming and so positive and they were like I don't a lot of them are like I don't have skin in the game So I'm able to comment on this and um, I'm happy to do that for all these people that like are too scared to talk to So about this.
Yeah, and I like so I read a blog post um about about someone's um Relationship in which they had like a lot of pain and they were basically like I want to speak out about This issue that created pain our relationship in it like Start according to me specifically personally and it's something that I like I'm not ready to talk about. I'm not ready to deal with the consequences of talking about it, right? But I emailed her and was like thank you for writing this post and there was like a short paragraph Like sort of dipping into what my experience had been and it was like I felt so much like relief in community when I read her post that I wanted to write this email But like I actually started the email two or three times thinking that I would write this really long thing And then I couldn't even do that. Yeah, so I sent it I sent a short thing And she wrote back this really great reply which was like It really helps me to hear that from you And you know that to know that there's someone else that's enduring the same pain Um, and then she spoke to specific things that I wanted to connect with her on I was like, yes, like I felt in my heart.
Yes me too, but I was like I can't talk about this anymore Like it's like it's too hard to like relive that trauma And so like I totally like I totally understand why people are quiet. No, absolutely and it's really hard to process It's certainly difficult to try and like find any kind of piece on right So speaking of harassment So all of this is going on right like Trump is an asshole and it all it like brings up all sorts of like trauma You know post-traumatic yeah like post-traumatic processing and Today our friend christy Who's a fucking hero like spoiler alert? Um, I know let me find the text messages So she texts us this morning. She's a starbucks getting coffee for her employees because she's the best boss ever So she's at starbucks and she's waiting for the drinks to come up You know like when everyone stands around awkwardly and you mentally are like counting how many drugs Are you just to make sure like they don't screw it up and like give you someone else's journey for like, you know Some lady doesn't take your drink.
It's a whole time. It's a whole stressful ordeal So she's just standing there waiting for the orders and there's an older guy who's in his mid 60s And he's standing hanging out too. Maybe waiting for his order. Maybe just being an asshole And he talked to three separate younger women.
So when she says younger, I'm thinking like 20 25 yeah, college age probably um and he's she just right she's harassing them Um commenting on their looks asking where they go to school Um to one girl. He made a really insulting comment about her age Which i'm guessing if christy is like the nicest most polite person ever Like most like she could even be like it was harassment and must have been over yeah when she says a really insulting comment about her age I'm guessing it was a like sexually over comment about her legality Yeah, if I were to read in harkstein, which I feel like you know about 15 years of being friends I feel pretty good at like understanding when christy's like really making him dig He gave an insulting comment sexual harassment, right? Okay, so um, so this is going on and christy like has enough Right, she's like this like this guy is too much criminal. Yeah, um and so she steps in Which i'm like I can't believe it.
It's so wonderful. Yeah, i'm so it off because i don't like I'm not sure if i've ever been in a situation like that where i've chosen not to like i can't remember for sure But i definitely on a regular basis i'm like i wish christy was here she would know exactly what to say in this situation Because she's so good at like handling she's still good at handling and she's so good at communicating on the spot Yes, you know whereas i'm like in a white way three months later. I'm like i have the perfect I'm like later in my journal. I'll write some really genius stuff about this Um, so she interrupts and she says sir, please stop bothering them Women don't appreciate comments like that and you're making us all feel uncomfortable very innocuous Which is like perfect thing to say accurate.
Um, and it's firm It's nonapologetic. It's saying message across it's saying call to action. Please stop Why it makes us feel uncomfortable. We do not appreciate it.
I feel like that landing page would convert it 100% Oh, yeah, no sign. Yeah, please stop. Yes click cta button unsubscribe from all the second levels cta Everyone's uncomfortable. We're all fucking uncomfortable Um, so that happens to the guy back down.
It's really cool I wish that was the end of the story where we just get to like reveled in the show How badass our friend is and pretend it was us and be like, uh, christy's like a shear out. Yeah, was what you said And I said bad ass but both of us use more explanation points than early letters. Sorry. Yeah, um, so no this guy doesn't just Shake like put his tail between his legs and wander away Which is the best I could hope for what he should actually give us apologize.
No. No, he chose neither of those things he Walked up to christy and got in her face and again for christy to say this this means he was so physically close away from her nose That means he was so physically close to her that she felt threatened And he yelled and he said What kind you jealous which I can't even I cannot even believe which it shouldn't matter but christy is super hot Yes, like it shouldn't matter but like she's not jealous of anyone Yeah, like no like i will also like really like it's he like really making a judgment call like the young girls versus christy Because i'm like sorry and then he said you can't take a joke That's because you're too stupid and jealous and old to get attention from men so many insults all in one tiny sentence Like a little like a little package of a little bow Because that's what he thinks of him My audience and i literally landing pages and sisal get him while they're hot He's looking a little cta's look pretty good. She is just Jellie or other podcast is really gonna land. Oh my god Dink page and she doesn't he doesn't stop right.
He's just like laying at her When you're my age you tell me what to do in the meantime shut your fucking mouth He's yelling this in the middle of a crowded Starbucks by the way So why everyone is watching so i'm gonna say crowded Starbucks who stepped into sacred by the way Do we say Starbucks enough times? Yes Starbucks is having a Starbucks I'm gonna get that it can be loud in the Starbucks Everyone needs their soul to caramel milk. I get it but not loud enough that someone get one of those right now I mean we can leave this news your not telling a story so So if we're done defending one in kind it's getting hot in here. I swear So who stepped into sacred no one no one and like here's the thing I get like So I was in a situation a similar situation.
Well, I was in a situation. I was at a Korean like massage spa Okay And an older man screaming so I know so it's like a it's like a room with probably 20 beds And it's like a clothes-on putt spot situation sure in the inse like a nice dark and their Mountains that distract from street noise etc You can hear the bell once one walks in the door which is great every door should have a bell noted Well, one time I was in a new story. You're already three stories deep away from the other story. It's like all I do It's just like we both do it.
It's just all curbing Wait, let's get out of your wrist. Let me just no let me just tell the story about the only man So I'm like in the zone someone's running my feet. It's the best day ever heaven because well when you have arthritis I get it your ill Shaming your one says I feel sick like every 30. I do feel I know I'm gonna get you some bread I'm laying down in the zone someone's over my feet.
It's great. I hear the bell ring. This guy says Jimmy openings really aggressively loud I hate that guy And um and the woman says no, I'm sorry. We're all full And sure and there was like three of us there She does she knows that that's a combo here.
It's clear when he continues to yell that he's some sort of recurring Offender. Yeah, and so he says what you're saying all of those bets are full in there. Yeah, this is our ladder refuse any customer So and um and he says there's somebody speaking English. I want to talk somebody speaks English But being English I don't even speak English right sir I was like, oh, what a massage and be a hundred dollars if you want a $20 massage you come where there's a language barrier And also you can experience it a culture and maybe why you're worldview I'm sorry that my so boxes are over the place.
Oh wait. No, I'm not anyway We're gonna interrupt about the ultimate soapbox or hair in a bit. So okay. Anyway, he yelled so much He kept going And I and she just kind of like I could just hear her like Dealing and just kind of like handling like she wasn't she wasn't telling you know, she was telling him you can't be here But she wasn't saying like I'm gonna call cops, which is how high I was like in the bed.
I was like I was like, I felt so like in the zone. No, I was like should I go out there? Like to do like I was like how can I like ally? How can I ask the only English speaker in this building this I just asked what like Fuck off.
Why did she say like go away? Well, it was far enough away. Yeah, like he like I would like a coward But there's like no way there's like a curtain and drywall between us Um, but yeah, no and I wanted to be like and then I wanted to like tell them like you need to call the cops next time But I was like there's no way I can communicate but even when he left He revved his engine aggressively like in the car like in the parking lot that I can hear it all the way back in the bed Okay, funny. And I was like, oh, so anyway, I imagine this guy's like that like krystys guy in the smog eye And um, so he tells her to shut her fucking mouth.
She's a star box. No one comes to help. I guess they're too busy blending ice No, she said everyone was watching. Well, yeah, of course ever.
Well, I mean, I'm sure everyone in the I'm sure everyone in the store was watching I can't I mean I can't account for a barista stressed out, but yes, it is uh, no someone screaming for you. Yeah, no Where is star bus should have absolutely stepped in stepped in absolutely and I don't know like I was just someone wasn't like, hey Like we don't like let's all keep it down like nothing. I know it's anything I can't believe and I wonder like what kind of training exists for that sort of thing like I'm sure you have the escalation Go downtown LA the escalation is like the number one training thing you come in there as like a regular person They're like whoa whoa whoa, okay, you're all right like no Well, but that's the thing in downtown LA. It's like homeless people and people with mental illness me looking for drinks Well, yeah, we tell her to report it.
Yeah, but guess what? It's not even over. Well, haven't then he's like you want to take this outside I can't imagine that like an old man's like a lady like what? I don't know.
She didn't like she described him. She described him like an average rich dad or rich dad of Alexis. Yeah Um, and so he says you want to take this outside and she said you know what sir have a good day and she walks out Um and I think she thought by like leaving she was ending it But no, but he followed her out which I can't leave nobody followed out to like to be like, oh, no I hope he doesn't like her stab her yeah And he says and here's the part where if you're playing the sexual assault drinking game at home You're really gonna get being yeah, you're gonna take a bunch of shots So then pick up your shot glasses. So because he says you don't have a penis.
You have no right telling me anything Truly stunning behavior. You don't have a penis Uh, people think that this dude thinks that like well, yeah, no, and that's like you said that it's so true It's like oh everyone thinks this he just said it. Yeah. No literally like I said earlier.
I was like I can't wait the generation to die I can't like what the hell I so I listened to this so I'm listening to this podcast about this murder It's like some cereal like a Jason podcast about the murder of this early in Beth a three or something in Ohio in the 70s And the journalist has been looking at that period of time and apparently that's like the most like the most serial murders Happened like in this like one particular decade compared to like ever since She was talking to a behavioral psychologist or a prophile detective, which is essentially the same thing sure And why like why was this going on? I heard one theory that it's because of men raised by World War II. Yes, that's what did you listen to this? No Yeah, this was the first time I heard this theory, but it was like well We're raised by parents and especially fathers who had been at war and therefore and I mean both my grandfather served So yeah, right and so like the majority of Children In the baby movement generation were raised by parents who may be suffering PTSD and who know well, no, no, you can't diagnose everyone You don't just automatically have PTSD Um like, you know, everyone ever an experience is trauma in a different way So my dad has a double whammy because he was raised by someone who did but then also he suffered a violent episode Like where his store was held hostage for people with assault rifles Yeah, and he was asked to choose like which of the employees to shoot basically something like that happened So he didn't have to and they all ended up being okay in the end but like but yeah, it's a traumatic experience Right and then I was a little kid.
I was like, why does my dad wake up yelling and my dad like think things were happening They're not happening. Yeah, like why is he so confused about all these horrible things that never happened? Right, but I was just like, oh dad's just yell. That's what they do So yeah, I mean there like yeah, there's this theory that There were so many serial killers because they were raised by people with unprocessed trauma Yeah, or they were raised by shitty parents Yeah, and maybe the parents were shitty because they had psychological Conditions or mental illness that may have been caused by World War II So some of us saying that like oh, we're gonna see a whole new crop of serial killers then from the wars that have gone on lately Well, except that there's way less Soldiers.
Yeah, and no one's drafted. So the people who are soldiers are more likely to be vetted properly obviously. No, no Obviously we vote birth theory. Yeah, no, obviously we vote birth all people.
People are cracks But in general, they're not in this desperate need for soldiers. So there is a better processing. Yeah, again on the west wing Josh's PTSD is being processed. Josh my love man.
If there is ever a Josh my love is Josh my love It's like sometimes I forget how much he like speaks to me. Oh, yeah And I was so this has been like I've always been a Sam See, well, exactly. Well, you and Kate left Sam. Yeah, and I think that is good to diagnose why you love Sam and I love Josh.
Yeah, like what is it? I mean, we like different men and we're like too I know but they like are different in the show too. Okay, so Sam in the last few episodes has been like obsessing about his words And he's like I need another polish or like this it's not sitting right pull back from the pull back from the press I need to rewrite this speech and this is like that scene has replayed several times through different episodes And I'm like, oh, Sam being such a Sam and I'm like this like I'm like it like reminds me how much you love him And so I don't know if it's like the idiosyncrasies. Uh-huh where you're just like where you're just like it's so funny How weird he's about words and I'm like I'm like it is funny.
It doesn't mean you want to bang him Yeah, hold everything you so good at everything but Josh is so funny Josh is funny But Sam is like so idealistic. Okay, but Josh is funny and then also like this smartest man in the room after Lee. I'm a guy Please Toby. Sorry.
I'm gonna have easy Josh Sam Sexual assault. How did we get on the west wing? I don't know what else have you got for us? I don't know how we got on West Wing But I will say Kristi contacted Starbucks corporate and reported the incident And again, she's a hero and they responded and then they said they were so sorry what sort of happened and and I also tweeted about it So that'll probably bring a great amount of change.
Well, yeah, no, you you're quite the platform I got four likes and two retweets. Did anyone tweet at you billboard rage? No So I guess let me check really quick to see if anyone tweeted at me the platform of podcasts. We're waiting for you Also, Netherlands.
No Netherlands has been a consistent listener. I think there's there's at least two I think there's a whole group. I'd like to imagine that it's some sort of book club, but instead of the book It's our podcast. Oh Netherlands we're coming on tour.
Do we want to like say something about sexual assault? Uh, yeah, I mean You can I will say oh, so there's this podcast my favorite murder, which is my favorite murder podcast. It is I love my murder ladies. They're amazing Georgia and yeah Georgia hearts are in karen kilkerif And their fans are amazing too because they make like fan art Yep, and fan art is all I want from the internet When I was watching such a good one today with the jiff of them driving and a car with rain and then like lightning would light up And there's something like a creeper in the backseat.
It was really good. Elvis was in the front seat too It was the cat. It was really good. I was watching the West Wing I was like I want the people from my favorite murder Facebook group to make me fan art about West Wing.
Can you imagine? Lemon's lemon's lemon's well, let's see No, I'm not like in a group. You know me. I try to fan around my own.
I still love fangirl I don't like to band together with the other groupies I like to lurk and like their personal case back. Cool. Anyway, um, they have this one thing that I feel like they've been trying to reinforce over and over again, um, is they say fuck politeness And it's so many um so many of the stories they tell these murder situations It's like happen in the perpetrator Murder or whatever is creepy and someone feels creeped out, but they like still keep talking to them They like the murderer is making out of the fact that people will be kind of like yeah So they're like I really need a ride and you're like this feels like a bad idea, but I don't want to be a ride I don't know how to get out of this or like you might say like I'm not sure and then they kind of get a case of story like what can you jealous? So they so they constantly talk about how like in every story they tell it'll point out like where like you don't have to be polite Not no because that's victim blaming to say someone went wrong Like you don't have to like take them for right and right it's okay to like draw boundaries even if it makes you feel like you're It's okay to act like you're being harassed.
Yeah, like if someone's like calling or whatever you can ignore it and then if they say Like what you don't want to look at me. You think you're too good for me Still ignore it like you don't or you can say fuck off and I did to the man shouting at me about a new paddle Can you paddle my ass? He'd fuck off and John was like why do you hold the homeless guy? And you're like as he was sexually harassing me.
Yeah, like it's like that's like that's so surprised though Like almost man. He was like what you'd like it like so just try to like offer me some helpful And you're like you can believe that like you can have your own feelings in opinions But you don't need to communicate them to me. No, like you do not have the right to do that and it's the same thing with um People like tell you to smile like does this happen to you like when you're like a Smile yeah, so that happens to me now. I just I like I like don't engage anymore I've trained myself out of that one.
I like won't even like give a week smile. I Just I smile because it's like the easy out. No, it's not because I like I'm being told to right right, but I mean I dated someone who would tell me that's freaky and like it kind of bothered me But at the same time I was like stop until I'm a fucking body like and in the end I was like I saw something of a really good answer where they were just like you should bear your gums and like go towards them Like like just make the creepiest smile they've ever seen and like like this and I was like that's such a good answer And like in discussion it was more like supposed like more about the sentiment like smiling means this and I'm like okay First of all if you're a stranger and that's why you're saying it. You don't get to care How I face the world, but if you're someone you're dating.
It's also don't say smile more. No, it's not a control me Yeah, it's oh I did have an answer with Alexa when we were at women.com. We're walking up a hill and um A little man was coming down the hill and he stopped us and we're like it's happening He was like did you two know it's illegal and we're like why he's like for two beautiful women to be walking along like this today And I was like oh you're so funny And as I walked away, I was like well, I'm not gonna tell a 90 year old man to fluck the fuck off Right and like and that's like he doesn't mean and he's right. He's like a nice old man.
He's not leering No, he was just being cute. Yeah, it was a different vibe Right and like and like and and there is a lot of nuance to that and I feel like a lot of people Right and a lot of people who commit harassment or even assault feel like they're just being that little man Right, but they're not right They're like hiding out of the guise of being that little man, but that's not what they're doing And because we've been so scarred by Every interaction right all of these other times where we have been harassing us or things them were hypersensitive about Someone telling you you're beautiful. That's an idea old man Right or someone you're dating saying I love your smile. You suddenly recoil and you're like Why are you trying to bail you think I'm a smile because you have all this like smart tissue Like anytime anyone tells me that I'm like stop trying to make me smile Right, even though that's probably not what they're doing, but who's to say everyone's a danger?
Wow, well this one off the rails, but I hate seeing the world that way. I just wanted to yeah I just wanted to make a comment about the latest and yeah, here we are. Absolutely The world sucks town. I know when it's sad and upbeat.
That'd be clothing. Well, as soon as you can find us on ice Wait, no joke like moments. I was actually assaulted and never remembered it until Like this is a joke like comment. Oh, okay.
That's a feature top of the full story. All right, joke like moment Um No matter what I do I am nauseous all the time and I'm not pregnant and I'm just a sick person That's just a good thing. I don't know like our listeners. I don't know what our segments are You know this one joke like moment.
What's your joke like moment? When I was driving here tonight, I was in some traffic and I don't let myself use my phone When I'm driving for you. Yeah, I tried to But in my new truck, I've got this nice Table essentially between the other passenger seat So I've taken up writing when I'm stuck in traffic actually Um because I've raised always full of things and I gotta get them out. Yeah, you know, it's like the pencil Some pencils not effects.
I hope I can't speak those up. Yeah, really lost on the people's not sure Anyway, um, so I was doing that pencils eating while I was writing made myself carsick Oh What's your joke moment? Um, I joke like moment would be that I went to the bank to get some Uh money for our couch guy a week or two ago and cash for the couch guy And I went in it was like the first of the month or something and I was very surprised to see so many people there And I was like, what's going on? I felt so confused and like very confused Um And so I get my cash or whatever and I'm talking to the guy and I'm like, what are all these people doing here?
And he's like, oh, it's the first of the month and I was like, what does that mean? He's like, we know rents or paychecks. I was like, oh my goodness. I'm of course I was very confused and then um, the guy Is like, I don't know what we're talking about Cash and how do you want it?
I was like, well, I'll take this amount and they'll have a little extra And he's like, okay, I'm like, you know, just walking around money and he's like, okay, but I was like, I don't know why I said that I'm sorry. He's like, here's your money. Goodbye Now I'll let you talk about walking around money I had to walk around money because I bought Kristi some beers that I put on my credit card scam number one and then she came back in cash best cam of life. Yeah, I heard it from I love Lucy.
You've seen that episode, right? Oh, yeah, no, and I got it about money. Right. I tell people about it all the time I'm like, no, no Lucy.
Lucy taught me about I also learned about it on reality bites Because she does that she buys people's gas and then they get her the cash with her dad's credit card. That's what she gets money Oh, she's like a high schooler. She's like college or something Um, yeah, so I put it on my card and I could see a cash and I was like, ooh Like like elders like surge my doc with my two $20 bills. Yeah Cash, uh, and then I had to open a new checking account with this credit union that I got my autolun through There are many other people by the way because they're like, here's all the money you could ever want.
Yeah, whatever sure sign here Oh, okay Anyway, in order to open the checking account, which was required in order to get out of money. I had to put down money I was like, um One second and I like dig in and I'm like, here's my walking around money And I handed over my two christ- treasured $20 bills The end All right, we had the two girls talking podcast. I'm Abigail. I'm Amanda.
We're two girls talking doc club That is our website two girls talking about club. You can find us there You can submit your joke life moments there and we'd love to hear them from wherever you are Whatever your joke life moment is be it small or mighty. You can also find us on iTunes Yeah, we're on iTunes and we're looking for reviews positive ones. No, it's okay.
It's okay. Yeah, we look people back at many times Yeah, we're trying here to get our make-one of you whatever back whatever Um, we would love reviews. We're coming up on our 20th episode. Um, we're planning something pretty special Reviews are gonna play into that.
So probably I don't know. I don't even want to say because I don't want you to hope so it's pretty cool Also, if you are listening to another country, could you please message us? We want to know Like maybe we want to have you on the show, but if that scares you You don't know we just the best chance of a meet cute at this point And so we're just really looking for like Anything hit us up hit us up. Good one.
I'm looking at you another lens anybody really on the website two girls talking about club Canada Canada's world Like we're huge in Canada. Well, I'm really excited about our international tour. Oh my gosh. That's gonna be so much fun.
Yeah, so Yeah, I'll say all the things reviews Something you've been telling people to do which I like yeah, I mean, you know depending on how good of a friend you are Also, do you guys feel like it's annoying if we say this at the end of our podcast sometimes people? Well, sometimes people in podcast they can just claim or before they ask for reviews sometimes they're like we need reviews or else we'll die Other times are like, you know gets really annoying, but I figure it's just kind of like the credits like you know It's over you can end if you don't want to hear about our website. I mean if you stop listening You would have missed our subtle announcement about the 20th episode, but you know and also our international tour currently So starting an ice lump so look for that if it was sometime in 2020 Yeah, and also contact us so we can come to your country because that's probably the only way I mean, uh, yeah, anyway, all right. I guess that's it.
But now we get to go find food, right? Yeah scavenge All right, bye Wasn't a place to prepare for me The great big ass face on there My face I stuff my face because it was free And when I was It's size was not The great Face I expect you to do that like like everyone should be able to do that, but I can tell that you are proud of yourself when you do it I do it exactly the same way. There's no difference. I know I listen to the recording.
It's amazing people aren't able to do that Really? I'm a born actress. Me too. Well, that's what I wanted to be really.
Yeah, I wanted to be triple threat I just don't want to be an actress. I don't know who now Oh, yeah, Meredith Meredith wanted to be. I was an acting class like all through elementary school. What happened?
Well, my family got four So then I couldn't take active class anymore. And also maybe I wasn't good. I'm not sure Mm. I remember from directing you in college as a voice actor that you uh lacked a nuance on occasion and would shout into the microphone So I do remember you getting upset about me shouting also.
I'm pretty sure the script is what lack she wants How dare you? It's like a murder mystery. Yeah, there's nothing less nuanced than a murder who done it You know, I tried to direct that cast the best at cast being a loose term the best I could also I feel like we didn't practice or anything. We just like Gonna scratch it then hopped onto those mics.
Yeah, well, they're gonna show to do the people needed there who don't need it there