170. Appetite

170. Appetite from lara's hype eng vol. K. Web player, likes, and session sync: https://lare.m-d-r-n.com/play/170 Telegram post: https://telegram.me/lara_just_in_case/262 Lyrics: [Verse 1] A letter with my name on it used to feel like a gift Now I see the envelope and think: oh god, what is it this time Conferences, collaborations, a new place to unpack Same activities, different mouth — the taste just didn't come back The information salad keeps changing its state Shredded fine and rearranged and served again on a plate I can run a bigger system, I can hold the whole weight But I'm doing it on willpower, not on anything great [Chorus] It's not the things — it's the speed they arrive The life outgrew the size where I could actually thrive I can manage it, sure — I just can't enjoy the ride That's not a personality flaw, that's a system at its size [Bridge] There was a volume once where I existed clean Small enough to taste things, large enough to mean I didn't know to measure it until it grew past me You can't fold a sprawl back into what it used to be [Verse 2] Not looking for a signal at the end of the dark Just a page with some numbers, just a place I can start Figure out what I'm pulling because I chose it And what I'm pulling because no one else was going to lift it [Chorus] It's not the things — it's the speed they arrive The life outgrew the size where I could actually thrive I can manage it, sure — I just can't enjoy the ride That's not a personality flaw, that's a system at its size [Outro] Planning how to change it Planning how to change it That's enough for now