172. The Words That Undermine Your Presence | Part 3 of 4

Send us Fan MailExecutive presence is not only about how you carry yourself or how you sound. It lives in the words you choose. Consider this: "Sorry, I just wanted to quickly jump in here. This might be a silly question, and I could be totally wrong, but I was kind of wondering if maybe we should look at the numbers again before we decide? Does that make sense?" In a few seconds, that leader undermined herself nine times. Her idea was strong. Her language was apologizing for it. If you have ever walked out of a meeting wondering why the room did not respond to a recommendation you knew was right, this episode hands you the exact words working against you, and the swaps that turn your competence back into authority.In this episode of Communicate to Lead, Kele Belton goes deep on the verbal pillar of executive presence: the actual words coming out of your mouth. She walks through four categories of language that quietly drain authority from strong ideas, the apologies, the minimizers, the hedges, and the filler words, and gives you the specific swaps that change how the room hears you. Through the story of Diane, a composite client twice passed over for a director role until she changed her language, Kele shows what shifts in your executive presence when your competence is no longer hidden by the words around it.This is Part 3 of the four-part Executive Presence Series. It follows Episode 168 on the visual pillar (the Three Anchors of Embodied Presence) and Episode 170 on the vocal pillar (pitch, pace, volume, and pauses). Each part builds your executive presence one layer at a time, leading to Episode 174, where all three pillars come together in a real high-stakes moment.What You Will Learn:Why women learn these speech patterns early, so you can stop blaming yourself for habits that were once rewarded.The gratitude reframe that lets you stay warm without lowering your standing in the room.Why the word "just" is a verbal apology for the size of your own thought, and the one-second fix that makes any sentence stronger.How a hedge at the front of a sentence quietly instructs the room to dismiss what you are about to say, before you have even said it.The phrase Kele gives every client to replace the question "Does that make sense?", which keeps your authority intact and still invites a real conversation.Why filler words are not the villain, except in the moments that matter most, and how the pause does the same job with the opposite effect.Your Action Step:Pick one word and hunt it for one week:Choose either "just" or" sorry", whichever shows up more in your speech.When you catch it before it comes out, delete it. When you catch it after it comes out, notice it without self-criticism, and keep going.Bonus: Write your three favorite swaps on a sticky note. "Sorry" becomes "thank you". "Just" gets deleted. "Does that make sense?" becomes "What questions do you have?"Mentioned in This Episode:Continue building your executive presence with Episode 170: Vocal Presence for Women Leaders (Part 2 of 4), on pitch, pace, volume, and pauses.Start the series from the beginning with Episode 168: How to Build Executive Presence with 3 Anchors (Part 1 of 4), on the visual pillar.Book a Leadership Strategy Call (30 minutes, complimentary): https://calendly.com/kele-thetailoredapproach/leadership-strategy-callAbout Your Host:Kele Belton is a communication and leadership facilitator, coach, and consultant who helps high-performing women in middle management build the communication and leadership strategies that get them recognized, sponsored, and promoted.Connect with Kele:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kele-ruth-belton/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetailoredapproach/Website: https://thetailoredapproach.com