175: The Case Against Becoming A Better Man

I've always been suspicious of this idea that becoming more selfish is the path to happiness. It feels like a lie. Especially when you're a father.    But you know what?   After hosting a handful of in-person events this year, I've noticed a silent crisis amongst men: We don't know how to get our needs met. We carry around invisible rucksacks that weigh us down, dim the color and depth of our world, and snatch peace, fulfillment, and joy from our grasp.   My suspicion about doing things that benefit me was an example of this invisible weight. Maybe yours is a productivity hack, a fitness schedule, or a weight loss journey. Defense mechanisms like these are smart and cunning, so they'll dress themselves up in a way that feels like moving forward…    …while you slowly watch your world get duller and less fulfilling around you.    So ponder these questions:   What if there was nothing to fix about yourself?    What if you didn't have to fill every spare second of your schedule to feel like enough?  What if you didn't need to become a better man to be happy and fulfilled and connected?    Join me as I try to answer these existential, yet empowering questions.    Here's a sneak peek at what's in this episode:    Why optimizing only your physical fitness leaves your mental, emotional, and social fitness hanging (0:27)  How the wrong environment can leave past pains and traumas trapped in the physical body (and why giving yourself a break from the daily drudge of your routine makes it easier to let them go) (1:22)  The invisible 60 lb rucksack that modern men carry on their shoulders without experiencing the immense relief that comes by setting it down (3:12)  Why losing weight can't make you happy forever (and what you actually need to do to feel the peace, fulfillment, and joy that's always available) (8:15)  Why you can't out-exercise a bad diet and you can't out-work a negative emotional pattern (and what to do instead to become the man you want) (8:43)  How approaching your emotions as THE solution, instead of the problem, makes all of your goals more achievable and more fun (10:18)  A heavy realization I made after recent Man Flow Yoga Events about why something feels like it's missing in so many lives of middle-aged men (19:00)  Why being selfish (like spending an entire weekend golfing) is perhaps the most counterintuitive, yet effective way to improve your relationships (24:32)  Resources mentioned in this episode:    1. Man Flow Yoga Events: Find the full list of cities we're coming to here: https://manflowyoga.com/man-flow-yoga-events/    2. Man Flow Yoga: Haven't signed up yet? Start your 7-day free trial and see how yoga can eliminate aches and pains better than other types of exercise here: https://shrtlnk.co/kP8M7