18. 11 Years, 11 Lessons: From Rejection to Reflection after Divorce

Send us Fan MailHey there, over here diving into Twixtmas and hoping you had a peaceful Christmas. This time between the holidays is magical for reflection, and I've always loved it. Back when I was married, those days when the kids and the ex were away, and I had the house to myself – it was almost better than Christmas! But then 2012 hit, and after a horrendous Christmas, I walked out on 28 of December. Unexpectedly, that became a blessing in disguise, and now, 11 years later, I want to share 11 key lessons I've learned.Lessons Learned:1. Being Rejected is Not the End   - I spent years fearing rejection, tying it to my worth. Turns out, rejection is redirection. It led me out of a toxic marriage into a happier life.2. You Can't Change Other People:   - No matter how much I searched for reasons behind the divorce, I couldn't change him. People show who they are; my ex-husband was always going to be who he was.3. Own Your Shit:   - The hardest lesson was owning my part, shifting from victim to taking responsibility. It's the third step in my Blossom Method.4. Heal Before Dating:   - Jumping into the dating pool too soon led to ‘encounters’ with all sorts. It’s not a clear water dating pool….5. No Need for External Validation:   - External validation used to be everything. Now, I've learned to find validation within, realizing I'm complete on my own.6. Solo Holidays are Cool:   - Discovering the joy of holidaying alone was unexpected. Embracing independence and enjoying my own company turned out to be pretty amazing.7. Knowing When to Throw Down the Anchor:   - Picture sailing through life, hit by a storm. Learning to throw down the anchor, finding stability amidst chaos, was a game-changer.8. Trust Your Gut:   - Trusting my gut was a tough lesson. I knew something was off in my marriage, but I doubted myself (as did everyone else). Always trust your gut; it's been my compass ever since.9. I love Sleeping Alone:   - Surprisingly, sleeping alone became a love affair. No snoring, no farting – just me and my abundant AF bed.10. Divorce is Not Shameful:    - Overcoming the stigma attached to divorce was liberating. It's not shameful, and I won't let societal judgments define my journey.11. Breath by Breath, Step by Step:    - Taking life one breath, one step at a time is how I moved forward after divorce. It's about showing up for yourself every day, gradually blossoming into the next chapter.So, there you have it – 11 lessons from 11 years post-divorce. I'm grateful for the empowerment and contentment I've found. If you've got your own lessons or thoughts, shoot me a message. Let's keep this conversation going.