18. The Emotional Tax at Work and How to Reduce It

We all know about income tax, sales tax, even luxury tax. But there’s another tax you’ve been paying silently and it may be costing you more than all the others combined. The emotional tax is the hidden toll you pay every day at work: the overthinking after meetings, the late nights staying “visible,” the self-editing in emails, and the pressure to prove your worth again and again. It doesn’t show up on your paycheck, but it drains your energy, focus, and joy. In this episode of Unlearning Work, Erin unpacks the concept of emotional tax through personal stories from her own corporate career and real examples from clients across industries. She explores why we keep paying it, the toll it takes on our health and careers, and how we can finally lower the bill. You’ll walk away with practical unlearning moves to notice where you’re overpaying, shrink unnecessary stress, and reclaim the focus and energy that’s rightfully yours. In This Episode, You’ll Learn: What “emotional tax” really looks like in daily work life Why unclear systems, hustle culture, and fear of judgment keep us paying it The hidden costs: productivity loss, career invisibility, and burnout Four unlearning moves to reduce emotional tax: Name it, Shrink it, Clarify agreements, and Build recovery Behavioral Science Highlights: Emotional Labor — the hidden cost of managing feelings and perceptions in the workplace Cognitive Load Theory — why constant second-guessing drains attention and memory Micro-Recovery Science — how small rituals restore energy and resilience Real-Life Examples: Maria, an operations leader, whose simple emails drained hours due to over-editing A site manager losing sleep replaying tense meetings with executives Erin’s own story of staying on late-night calls just to “look committed” A young manager who silenced her own ideas out of fear of sounding “too junior” Try These Unlearning Moves: Name the tax: Notice when you’re paying in stress, not actual work Shrink the task: Break projects into clear, bite-sized steps Set agreements, not assumptions: Confirm expectations instead of guessing Build recovery: Add small rituals, walks, breaks, disconnecting to restore energy Reflection Prompts: Where are you paying the highest emotional tax at work? What’s one “tax” you could stop paying this week? How would your work feel different if you designed it to reduce tax instead of tolerate it? Join the Conversation ✨ Take the free Work Style Assessment to uncover your natural style and the hidden taxes you may be paying. 💬 Share your results! Tag @erinmerideth and @unlearningwork and use #UnlearningWork to connect with others lowering their emotional tax. 🔗 Download the Unlearning Work App to access quizzes, worksheets, and custom tools for each Work Style. 📲 Subscribe & Stay Connected 📥 Download the Unlearning Work App for worksheets, behavior tools, and habit tracking 🎧 Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite app ⭐ Leave a review if this episode resonated—it helps others discover this work 📬 Join the Work Reimagined Newsletter for exclusive tools and behind-the-scenes insights 📱 Follow Erin Merideth on Instagram, X (Twitter), Facebook, and LinkedIn for weekly strategies grounded in leadership and behavioral science