191: Overcoming Parental PTSD: Lara's Story

Imagine sitting on your front porch, enjoying a quiet moment after school drop-off, only to suddenly find yourself in the grip of a panic attack—not because something went wrong, but because nothing went wrong. For Lara, this was the reality of parental PTSD. After years of daily phone calls, school expulsions, and crisis management, her nervous system had forgotten how to feel safe in the calm. In this emotional episode, Lara shares her family's incredible journey from "survival mode" to thriving. She opens up about her son Oliver, who was once on three different medications and struggling with severe meltdowns and aggression. Lara candidly discusses the turning point that occurred during a family vacation, the step-by-step nutritional changes that transformed their lives, and the joy of finally taking a family trip to a museum without fear of a public incident. Listen in to learn how Lara weaned her son off medication with doctor support, how she and her husband navigated their own healing, and why the silence after the storm can sometimes be the hardest adjustment of all. Key Takeaways [04:45] Early Signs of Dysregulation - Lara describes the extreme rage cycles and daily meltdowns that began when Oliver was just two years old. [06:12] School Struggles - The heartbreaking reality of being dismissed from multiple preschools and eventually a public school due to severe behavioral challenges. [12:14] The Medication Load - Oliver was on three medications—Abilify, Celexa, and various stimulants—yet the family was still "drowning in emotional roller coasters." [13:57] The Turning Point - How a YouTube video discovered during a desperate family vacation in Florida shifted everything for Lara and her husband. [18:27] Tackling Overwhelm with Baby Steps - Why eliminating one food group at a time—and not striving for perfection—was the key to making dietary changes sustainable. [28:57] Feeling Again - The powerful moment when Oliver verbally expressed anger for the first time after coming off numbing mood stabilizers. [31:03] New Freedom as a Family - The family's ability to travel to Washington D.C. and visit museums without fear of elopement, aggression, or major dysregulation. [33:33] Parental PTSD - Lara shares her "porch story," describing a panic attack triggered simply because the school didn't call with an emergency. [39:01] A Mindset Shift That Helps - Lara reminds parents that children are born with all the emotions—but not yet the skills to manage them. Memorable Moments "We ran into several mothers along our path and that was the best support for me because I could talk to them about what was going on and they didn't look at me like, what are you doing wrong?" "We tried everything else. This makes sense to me… This is our chance." "I remember the first time he said, 'I feel so mad'… This poor kid was so numbed and dulled that he had all these things going on, but he wasn't able to say how he felt." "I was just there and I felt a panic… I really thought I was gonna die… I experienced a panic attack, and I don't know why. There's nothing to worry about. My son is doing great." "Lara, your nervous system is in fight or flight, and your brain still thinks you need to fight or flight." Dana Kay Resources: 🔗WEBSITES: ▶ https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/ ▶ https://dana-kay.com/ 👋SOCIALS: ▶ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/ ▶ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/ ▶ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute ▶ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/ ▶ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/ ▶ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute 📕INTERNATIONAL  BEST SELLING BOOK: ▶ Thriving with ADHD – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/ 💻FREE MASTERCLASS ▶ Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl ⭐COURSES & PROGRAMS ▶ ADHD Parenting Course – https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parentingadhd ▶ ADHD Thrive Method 4 Kids Program – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/packages/