#191 - When Success Stops Holding You Together with Steven Ferrara

Steven Ferrara built a small family insurance business in Newark, New Jersey into a large financial services firm and served as CEO for 25 years. He was 49 when his son Christopher died in a car accident at 23. In this conversation he tells I talk with Steven about what that did to a spiritual foundation he had been building since he was a teenager, and what he found on the other side of it. This is not a grief episode dressed up for executives. It is a conversation about identity. Steve spent a career deliberately not getting entangled with his title, and he explains why that turned out to be the thing that let him survive what came next. He talks about the five minutes he took behind a closed door between back-to-back meetings, about the coach who told a room of high performers they did not need more work ethic, and about the day his teenage daughter asked him why everyone at his office respected him. If your title is currently holding you together, this hour is worth your time before something proves it cannot. YOU WILL LEARN - Why Steven stopped asking "why" after his son died, and what replaced it - The specific practice his executive coach named as more valuable than work ethic or motivation - How not identifying with your title changes what you can survive - What transcendental meditation actually does, and why Steve says guided meditation is easier - How to let sadness pass through without turning it into a story you live in - Why slowing your voice down in a leadership meeting makes people listen harder CHAPTERS 00:00 Who Steven Ferrara is beneath the titles 03:40 Learning transcendental meditation as a teenager 07:06 What "transcendental" actually means 11:21 The five minutes he took between meetings 13:24 High quality free time, and why leaders skip it 15:16 Building a financial firm from cold calls 19:51 Why he never got caught up in being CEO 21:52 His daughter's question about respect 23:38 The morning after Christopher died 26:04 Giving up the question "why" 28:24 From what could have been to what can be 31:54 Ryan on losing his closest friend 32:19 Thinking about loss versus experiencing it 34:40 Finding gratitude without agreeing with the loss 37:03 The journal entry that changed everything 39:00 What an ongoing relationship really means 41:48 Who "Grief to Gratitude" is for 44:38 A Course in Miracles, Eckhart Tolle, Michael Singer 51:03 The bridge for leaders who have not faced loss 55:42 Why slowing down makes people listen 57:02 Reframing sadness as another form of love 1:01:49 What peace looks like now 1:05:14 A new paradigm for death, and therefore life 1:06:57 Where to find Steven and the book ABOUT STEVEN FERRARA Steven Ferrara expanded a small family insurance business founded in his hometown of Newark, New Jersey into a large financial services firm, serving as CEO for 25 years before selling the company in 2020. For two decades he taught universal and spiritual principles for the Concept-Therapy Institute alongside his father and sister. His work has been shaped by A Course in Miracles and the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, David Hawkins, and Michael Singer. After the death of his 23-year-old son, Christopher, and later his wife, Alie, he turned two decades of daily journals into "Grief to Gratitude: Embracing the Inner Pathway to Healing and Peace," published by Amplify Publishing Group and endorsed by Jack Canfield. STEVEN'S LINKS Website: https://www.stevenferrara.com Book on Amazon: https://amzn.to/4oTDtDJ Book at Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/grief-to-gratitude-steven-a-ferrara/1148376266?ean=9798891388116 Book at Bookshop.org: https://bookshop.org/p/books/grief-to-gratitude-embracing-the-inner-pathway-to-healing-and-peace-steven-a-ferrara/14aa1bc309656c55?ean=9798891388116 Substack: https://stevenferrara.substack.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stevenferraraauthor Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/stevenferraraauthor YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@stevenferraraauthor RYAN'S LINKS Ryan Watts Coaching: https://www.ryanwattscoaching.com The Personal Success Podcast: https://www.ryanwattscoaching.com/thepersonalsuccesspodcast LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryanwattsmba If this conversation landed, subscribe to The Personal Success Podcast. New conversations every week with people who have walked through change and found a deeper way forward.