198 Crash Test Kathy BDSM

I have something just for Kathy for next week. Do you have something for Kathy for next week? Yes, I do. That would be good.

So if she actually was here, then she would get it this week. She would just get it. Yes, she would just throw her down and give it to her. You want this also means I was actually going to hang out with Kathy outside of here tomorrow.

Yeah. Now it's not going to happen. You know why? Because Kathy sucks.

That's why, younger. I'm a little bummed about that. Not tomorrow's day after. I'm going to say, because Kathy sucks.

Because we were going to go abstrolling and I doubt she's going to be a force. She may need an extra other reason. You just ran across here. Looking very cute.

And I guess Del's going to be here. But you know what? What? Hunger?

Yeah, that's OK. Let's just start the fucking show. Why not? The following show is for mature audiences only.

Listener discretion is advised. And if you don't like it, please go fuck yourself. One, two, three, four. Do you feel your sex life is quite lame?

Fuck out. Scared that your desires might be strange. Burning my dress. Join the Kinky Wells of Play.

Burning my dress. Fuck out. Wait! Beep beep.

Go ahead, Mio. Mio. Hello and welcome to Proverte podcast. The show where we explore the adventures of the Kinky lifestyle, sex and perversion.

Recording live from the threshold level up here in North Hollywood, California, in front of a studio audience of pretty much no one except for Del Nue and Unger and May. I'm Kathy. And I'm Dell. And I'm Unger, Black Crotch, all the things.

We made you a new one last week. I don't know what it was. I don't remember what it was. Well, everybody.

Here we are. Show 198. I think it's 198. Do you know, Del, that we have not even made any preparations, Del Unger.

We have not even made a single preparation for our 200 episode. Well, we have a month. No, we don't. We have two weeks.

OK, Matt. That's 10 days, which, which, wouldn't that make it like on the first of April? That'd be amazing. That'd be amazing.

I have no gags. No technology. The gag is that, well, let's just hear it in song. Everyone hear it in song.

Yeah. Yeah. Good old Kath. Good old Kath.

You know what's missing here? Del, Kathy, Kathy Unger. Yes, but. You know something missing?

Oh, Kathy. You are correct, Unger. Kathy is not in her chair doing her thing, making her sounds her Kathy sounds because Kathy apparently and gravity are not good friends. And I don't know, I guess about an hour and a half, two hours ago, I found out that Kathy had injured herself.

She sprained her ankle and fucked up again. What, three weeks ago, she destroyed her fucking knee falling up the stairs, trying to help me open the door. So this time she just added insult to injury and now screwed up her ankle. But she said, I'm coming in.

I got crutches, not blood crutches, but crutches with a T. But yeah, that's what happens when you leave us alone. Yeah. So then all of a sudden, I'm like, OK, well, she's coming in.

You know, do you need anything? No, I should be fine. And then literally a half hour later, she's like, I'm at creative explorers or wherever the fuck she was. And she's like, I can't get into the car.

I called work, I canceled work, I can't work for the next couple of days. I'm wounded, I can't come into the show. That was it. Six 30, younger.

Yeah. And we start recording at 8 p.m. Yeah. So I'm like, no work, Kathy.

I'm kind of fucking buggy. We got younger. We got there. We got you.

I'll just come up with a show in 30 minutes. Be good. And here we are. Yeah, that show I was talking about three dudes and a mute.

Because she doesn't talk. Or do they're just a Pokemon. They just they can only say their name. That's pretty much.

That's it. And you've already bailed. Muse already on the computers. Yes, Kathy.

Kathy thrown it. That's what my like rest. Yes, that is just not even happened. And we are just here three dudes in a mew.

But you know what? In honor of it being fucking sword fight night. Because that's pretty much it. Three sausages and a cute little growliff and.

Oh shit. I said that. OK, tell now that you know yesterday was a wonderful day. We went out on a little pokey adventure.

The three of us, you, you, you, Dell and you and myself. And we went to Santa Monica Pier, which is supposed to be like Pokemon heaven. Yeah. We're where everything is and people do a lot of raids and join in groups.

And it was that it was pretty insane. What did you think of yesterday? It was quite fun. I don't think I've seen like a raid spot have 60 people like we were trying to get into same group and the same group and it was just like, oh, are you the butter free?

So no, no, no, no, I mean, the other like three days. So what so to explain to our audience, the 90% of our audience has no fucking idea. Surprisingly, since I started getting obsessed with this game, a number of our listeners are like, you have to add me as a friend on this game and they all play, but we all pretend we don't. And so what a rate is is as we all, you know, there's little places in the virtual map of the universe.

It's a group activity of there's normally things you can do by yourself. And these are like the large boss monsters where unless you're a god or it's one of the weaker ones, you can't do it yourself. You got to do. So you got to have a group of people.

So at Santa Monica Pier in Santa Monica, like it's not the most dense location wise, but there's so many people there and so literally there's so many people. Like they give you like three minutes to do a thing and you'll beat it in like 15 seconds. Yeah. So it was a lot of fun and we went down.

It was a little too direct sunlight for me. Yes. None of us. None of us are on some block.

I was a not smart. That's right. Look at your fucking face. You look like a Star Trek character.

Yeah, it's asymmetrical too. So I'm just owning it. I'm going to see those. No, because those were there and I'm way over here.

Yeah, far I'm in the light. Yeah, let's go. Let's go next time we'll go in. So that was a lot of fun.

But in that vein, so you and I, we've been going through all this stuff, like Bunny hasn't been here in a while because she's doing finals and Muse studying and there's all this stuff. And so, you know, there hasn't been as much sexy time. And so I was indirectly blamed for that for reintroducing to Pokemon. Yes.

So no, no, no. I mean, OK, yeah, whatever. Fucking whatever. So anyway, so everyone's kind of just kind of, you know, and it's fine.

You know, there's ebb and flow in relationship, especially sexually and there's times, you know, Muse really focused on this study and the things that's been going on in her life. And it's OK if there's a little dip in the sexuality, still very much love each other. There's the relationship is great. As long as you're still communicating.

Great communication. There's no big deal. And we still, I mean, what is a decline for us is still above average for most, you know, people in the world, you know, we still have sex a few times a week and we still play. And we still do that.

We did a really wonderful wax placing last week, you know, so it's not bad. But so because it's not going to be sexy time all the time and surely not the amount of other partners that we've had, sometimes women decide that all of the grooming is not as necessary. And I don't give a fuck about that, you know, and I'm just like, it's fine. You know, it's like, yeah, every now and again, you know, let's clean it all up.

So you kind of let herself go a little bit and she's like, I was hiding in the bush. So she's daddy. She's like, Daddy, I'm really horny. I'm really, really horny.

And she like, you know, I'm having hair. And so she ripped, she rips off her pants and I go, Oh, look, a growlet, which is a furry dog character in Pokemon Go, which, uh, Dell, under dude, dude, dude, bro, bro, bro, not the best pre sex adjective or name to give your girlfriend before coyotes. Yeah, you could at least go for full pics. That's a crap.

Yeah. So it's very, you know, full pics is a little cleaner, but rather a dog. Hey, she's my little bitch. Aren't you, honey?

Oh, wow. So, okay, this is not going well. But anyway, we had good growl of sex and, uh, and it was very funny and she did laugh about it and she did a permission to talk about it. She's like, what?

And I'm like, yeah, come on for the show. So, uh, so that was fun. Uh, let's see what else is going on. Uh, yeah, talked about that.

That's it. I'm going. Yes, boogie. What's happening in chat or your life?

Well, chat, we're talking now about Pokemon again, because I told them that you guys are talking about Pokemon. Ah, I actually got away this weekend and I'll be getting away next weekend. We can after put, um, had some time with Aki. So things went crazy as always.

Cool. Um, one thing for the listeners who have been asking, we finally did the how to make a fire wand video. Ew. Very good.

Two of them. One of them. One of them. One of them.

Oh, what? No, no, no, no, one of them is up. The other one isn't, but we live streamed the second one. So actually people, there were people watching me make them and messing up while I'm making a little nice, well, the first one's on YouTube on the don't do it.

The other one's channel channel. Um, the other one's still just in my, you haven't edited it. It did it. It did it.

It did it. Videos because the mistakes are fun because that's why we're here. Right? We make the mistakes of the listeners don't have to.

You know, there is a certain element of production that I do put into the show because if we allowed all the mistakes to happen, you know, he likes being laughed out occasionally or laughed with I get laughed at all the time. Yeah, even with production. So even with production. So we, we finished these and we have a couple of ones sitting here and we were talking about how to eat fire safely and people not wanting to go with the normal fuel.

So we decided to test a couple of things. Of course that's going to go well. Well, some flower oil was cool because it popped and sent firey popping balls of oil all over the place. So you put sunflower oil in your mouth.

Kids, I don't mean try this. No, no, no, no, we were just putting it on the torch. Okay. We're doing fire eating.

So we just putting it on the torch, not even doing anything else beyond that and it's popping and stuff. We're like, this isn't good to do. We're just going to put this in the sink and call it a day. You put the oily fire in the sink to put it out with the water on.

You're not supposed to do that with oil, are you? It's such a little amount of oil. Okay. And most of it's in the wicking.

Okay. It's just we need to fire up. Okay. Then we did olive oil and it didn't pop.

And I didn't think things threw completely. And fire eating with it was fine. I did that. It was great.

But before I did that, I tried flushing. I tried flushing. You were taking a shit while you were. I tried doing a hand extinguish.

Oh, oh, that's called flushing or flushing. I mean, fireplace that we do right is is in the fire eating community. The fire performance community is called flushing. Okay.

Same thing. Okay. And it cooks skin because it's got a higher flash point than. So this is happening while I'm doing video while I'm taking a live video and I do it.

And you're selling this thing good to people. I'm going to run to see that. Aki's sitting across for me watching me do this. She realizes, Oh, this wasn't the best idea.

I keep doing the video for three or four more minutes while my hand is in intense searing pain. Did you keep it straight? I did. Didn't even let him know.

You're on that. It ended suddenly. It's like, yeah, there's why. I shut the picture of my hand.

So yeah, that was fun. And then those, the second video will be up on my YouTube shortly. I got to figure out how to pull it from Twitch, which you can do from a computer, but it's not as easy from a phone without using a third party app. So that reminds me, I taught a fireplace class and, uh, and I had asked somebody to, you know, and I'm talking about things that can go wrong and how, you know, all the things like hunger talks about in his classes and this is what can go wrong and you have to have a plan and you have to be ready and you have to be able to stay calm and react.

And I had somebody whose name I won't mention, uh, who is very, was very big in the community. And I'm like, Hey, spot me, you know, stand there. If anything goes wrong. And I'm teaching people how to fire tempo.

So basically just you light a tray on fire with 70% isopropol. It makes a flame about it, you know, foot and a half doll. And then I'm just teaching people how to run to be brave enough to just run your hands through it quickly. And then just gauge the tempo of the seppen and then see how fast or how slow you have to go to make it warm, make it hot, make it burn.

And so I was doing that. And then I had this thing where I wanted people to learn how to put out of the fire because the 70% isopropol goes out very easily because it's 30% water. That's why we only say people should use that level because it goes out very easy. And I have years and years of experience with that with that fluid.

So I would pour some on this, this wood kind of bench thing and then I would, you know, I had it in a tin and then I would like the tin and dump it over and I go fire, fix it. You know, so like, oh, what do I have to fix it? So they would have a towel or something to put on it. And I had everyone do like an emergency procedure, you know, to kind of practice like when shit goes wrong, here's something you would do.

And if you can't handle this, you shouldn't do it when there's a person. So so everything was going really well. And I forgot what happened, but I went to grab a thing and I rubbed alcohol on both my arms instantly like I something and both of my arms lit on fire up to the forearms. And I'm just taught.

And I'm talking of course, just like, you know, I'm talking while teaching and I'm like, Oh, here's this. And I see eyes getting wider because the fire is not going out and I'm hitting faster. And I'm like, you know, it's just going to go get some better get this out. And then fucking it's sitting there and the whole time fucking Mr.

Expert in the lifestyle spotter is just standing there watching the flames get bigger on my arms. And then you know, this is all spans, you know, like four seconds and then it goes out, but it's that kind of thing that you're talking about where that is great. Don't spot if you're not going to actually spot. Well, you know, you know, and that's the other thing to think about is do you know, because maybe this person in all their experience with all the things that they're great at, maybe spotting in fireplace wasn't something they had ever done.

And so when you screen people to be a spotter or to help you with something, you know, that's those are the questions that not just ask them right before. Hey, can you spot me when I do this? Sure. No problem.

Have you spotted fire play before or fire? Yes. Yeah. Like this.

And that's I think that's extra in it. Of course worked out, you know, and I didn't get a blister, but you did. I have a huge blister on my palm. That takes some of the dark over here.

That's because you had just yank it fast. Yeah. Fast yank and you got a blister and how does that even happen? But that led to the other aspect of the weekend.

What was the other aspect of all day? Drawing axis? Well, we did do that. But how can you throw axes with a giant blister in your hand?

That was we threw axes before the fire thing happened. OK. So we ended up at a friend's house who first went to their new place in San Diego. It's a really nice house.

And this guy take all the toys that you have and all the toys that I have, right, and put them together. And that's one of his storage areas. Very good. Three.

They're good. Wow. That's an enthusiast with some disposable income. Yes.

Yes. And good friend of my for years. I really like it's like, com for dinner comes to see the place. And the whole time we're there, it's like every time we turn, I was like, so if you see anything you want to try, let us know because he was there with his girlfriend.

And I was like, with a with a hockey, not a cat. Can't he's not here on guard? No, no, neither. Zach.

Um, so so we had to do we had to run a run an errand. So we leave and come back and have dinner. And the whole time we're having dinner, Aki is poking at the splister. Oh, that's not going to go well.

Stop. That is not going to go well. So his girlfriend said, you know, what do you keep doing that? And she's like, I don't know.

It's just I just want to. And it's like, and then they start taking off what they have that would keep her from doing it outside the normal. And after a couple of suggestions, we ended up with a straight jacket, Oh, which is good. So I'm using because on the way back to run this errand that we had to run, Aki looked at me and said, straight jackets, I was like, yes, there were a number of straight jackets in that one place and, you know, different types of letter and cotton and stuff.

And so they bring that up like second of the thing. So it's like, oh, well, it's meant to be we're going to be doing straight jackets today. So I've really haven't done much with straight jackets either. So it was fun for me to actually try to put her in while she was struggling.

And so I had to go to get her in. Oh, definitely. Nice. Got her in nice and nice and snug.

Did you get her on? Pankin afterwards. Huh? Did you get her a pankin when she was in there?

And poking that blister. No, we just kind of sat there and watched her. Oh, no, I thought I'd just roll around. I threatened her that if it did pop open, I was going to make sure it sprayed all over her.

Oh, you mean the blister? A blister. Eww. It's being sticky.

Oh, so it was great. So she's the fear of being sticky. Yeah, she doesn't like being sticky. No, no sticky gal.

Not at all. Not at all. Rolling around in corn syrup, ticad gal. While it's happening, but the moment it's over, it needs to be gone.

Yeah. And yeah, so that was part of our adventures this weekend. But I'll get the other one on my other five video on YouTube is impossible. So those of you who have been complaining about me not doing it are asking me to do it regularly.

They're there and I'll do it. It's very good. Hey, guys, by the way, Gabby and Bradley are good friends. Looks like Kathy butts herself up again.

I didn't have long to make that jingle. No, just letting you know. No, it works. Not a lot of time.

So because of that, I had to kind of pull some shit out of my ass and make a host topic. But hopefully it'll go well. So instead of our fat life, so I'll just we'll just do this. It's not good now.

For your peace of mind, I wrote some bullshit and now I'm going to read it. It's actually not bullshit. It's something that I've been going through a lot recently and learning and I'm definitely going to need you guys to pipe in if you can. And so I'll just read some shit I wrote and crisis.

Bam. Shit's crazy. Unexpected change is imminent. What do I do?

How do I react? How do I fix this now? This is the fodder of many bad decisions in the lives and relationships of many humans throughout history. The chemicals that are creating tyranny of the urgent anxiety and catastrophizing in your mind.

Don't understand shit like the farther you get from the fire, the more the smoke clears. It doesn't understand I can fight better if I know what I'm fighting. Those chemicals drive in the moment they trigger a I must act now insanity that in some like me. Like me.

Push me to become instantly defensive, offensively reactionary and ready for doom. I am notorious for catastrophizing because I'm used to shit inevitably going bad. But I have found my fellow sausages and sexy growleth. I have found that unless it's a medical or real emergency that if I wait a bit, I get more information and I do less shit that I have to apologize for or clean up after later.

What do you think about that? The idea here is obviously with a lot of stuff going on and a lot of uncertainty and a lot of things that just happened instantly, which I'm very used to. I'm used to shit going bad. The floor drops out, you know, not going into too many details over some of the events in my life that have happened.

But stuff goes bad and you got to move and you got to create a you got to create a solution fast and you have to react to someone fucking you over stabbing you in the back or getting arrested or whatever the fuck it is. You have to deal with something now and it could be drastic. It's all of a sudden you've lost all your money and now your homeless, which has happened multiple times to me. So because of that programming, I'm very knee jerk when something comes up that threatens any stability that I have because I never expect my stability to last.

And that's what makes me overreact catastrophize and do things. Have you guys ever had that many times in my life? How do you deal with it? Oh, it varies greatly.

I mean, kind of both negative and positive. Yeah, most recently, you know, being laid off. OK, like your job's done in a week by, you know, and with things planned with, you know, my daughters and adult. I still help her out a lot.

I help a lot of family out. And now it's like, whoa, what am I going to do? And so I I went a couple of ways. I want to kind of focus on, OK, made a plan.

This is what I need to do. I also kind of backed away from everything, a lot of social stuff to kind of focus on getting and focus on the job that I need to finish, which is a lot of times what I do. And it's kind of drop off. I mean, I drop off away from family and stuff even really just kind of ignore them and go, OK, I need to do this so that I can re fix everything from this point.

All right, good. I like that foundation to work out from. Otherwise you can't do anything. Yeah, it's too much.

Like focus on one thing and work out like when I get in a bad headspace, I have a journal. I don't do it daily just because if I make too long of a to do list, I'll beat myself out that I didn't do all of it. Oh, yeah. So I need to like set realistic or smaller number of goals and then feel good when I accomplish those and then I can build on that.

Just sure. Sure. I forget me. You said me.

You handles things with me. I think for myself, this is such a this is such a struggle because it's really embarrassing for me because I am. I am a very paranoid person. I have a lot of vulnerability and now I'm not talking to the people in the room.

I'm talking to the microphone and hopefully the people straight ahead of me that are listening. I've spent so many years living in fantasy. So many years not dealing with things well or going back to drugs and alcohol or becoming, you know, whatever vagabond living in vans and motor homes and things like that, that sometimes it's hard when that happens to hold on to your self worth and your value in yourself. Because I'm so used to just saying, I'm a piece of shit.

This is what happens to pieces of shit. I'm just going to I'm just going to go and do something to myself that is worthy of a piece of shit, which would usually be go by a van. Park outside. And that's what I did in this recent situation.

I'm like, OK, I can do this. I can go get a van. The gym is 24 hours. It's great.

There's Pokemon in the parking lot. You know, I can I can I can survive. I can do that. And I had to stop myself because it was so easy to just go to the low end.

It was so easy to just go to the I don't deserve a place to live because, you know, I'm a fuck up. I can't take care of my girls. I can't buy him things. I can't buy him dinners, you know, because I was already making shit money.

But to stop and to be able to turn around and say, Hey, wait a minute, in these last years, I've had to learn some value for myself in order to not have the most punishing thing I can do to myself be the answer to say, wait a minute. Instead, what if I valued myself a little bit and gave myself a little bit of time to think of a better plan? And when I started doing that, I started seeing options that I had never seen before, you know, all these years that I've taken care of, you know, a threshold and doing doing all the little weekly things and handling events and parties, you know, with everyone else in the board and all the other leaders and volunteers. Well, that's that's coordination.

That's management. That's event planning. That's, you know, you know, understanding how a business runs. These are all these things that I have learned over the years.

They're actionable skills. That these are actual things that you can use in a real job. I don't have to go and just clean toilets. I don't have to lower myself to the point to where all I'm good enough to do is to clean the toilet and believe me, nothing, nothing wrong with being a janitor.

Any legitimate legal work that you do, it's an important job because if someone doesn't clean that toilet, it's going to be full of shit and no one's going to go to your business. So there's nothing wrong with being a janitor. There's nothing wrong with taking care of that. But it doesn't have to be the thing that you just default to if you can have some ambition to do better for yourself because I'm not going to be able to physically be a janitor for much longer.

You know, I got back problems. I mean, Kathy and I both were fucking wrecks. You know, we're just we're just we're just broken down. I'll play it in a second.

So it's just so this is real important to me and and hunger. Thank you so much for for saying because I'm like, okay, well, now we have to have some practical application. I'll bitch and whine about things. But it really is tips for when things go bad.

Sometimes that pause that just take that pause. Okay, it's going crazy, but it's not a gunshot wound, a natural disaster or your house is on fire. There's a lot of things that happen and it may smack the fuck out of you, but it doesn't mean that you have to act this second. No, the only thing you really do right away is get control of yourself.

So you don't spiral. That is probably the wisest thing that has come out of this conversation. And then once you get control of that, then you can figure out from there, then you can then you can start making that plan. You can start planning and set like they'll set reasonable goals, right?

And don't kick yourself if you don't make one. Absolutely. And this applies in relationships too, because a lot of times in a relationship, you have this big blow up that happens and everything gets reactionary. And and I freaked out on you a couple of weeks ago.

I don't remember if I talked about on the show, but I freaked out really bad over something. And and as as insane as I am, even that was super out of character for me with me. We don't have a lot of fights. And so I had to step back and say, where is this coming from?

You know, this isn't about the instance. This isn't just about the instance. This is about all the things. And and until you step back and make that plan for yourself and give yourself time to get it control of yourself, all you're going to do is make sure you got to clean up.

All you're going to do in relationships and to sit back for a little bit. And that's where things like fuck, you know, have a distraction, have some distractions that you go to, you know, like Pokemon go getting the fucking car. And that's what I did for a couple of weeks. And I got in the car and I just said, I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do.

What kind of activity so you can get into a rational state. Yeah, just let those chemicals kind of work themselves out because those chemicals are fight or flight. And if you're used to a certain program, you're always going to default to the kind of those. But if you give yourself that time, have a distraction, you know, read a book, go watch a movie, see a game, do something, you know, get yourself out.

And then another thing that has been really good for me, and especially when I was in a really dark place. I had mantras, you know, have those mantras that are just fucking programmed. This too shall pass pretty much one of the most famous mantras that can be when dealing with a situation that's like fucked up. This too shall pass.

Your happiness is going to change. Your sadness is going to change. It will pass the universes in motion. Whatever is happening right now, if you get a little distance from it, you know, there's not as much like the fire and the smoke, you know, if you let some time pass, if you get away from the fire, it'll be less smoky and you can fucking see, you know, and so those types of things are going to be better.

And let's see if I had another point on making. And like Unger said, and this is where Unger started right out with, have a plan ahead of time for many different catastrophes. This is something that I've done. As I said, I know how to be poor.

I know how to be fucking poor. I can be poor like nobody's business instantly. I will eat. I will have a place to watch my ass.

I can make it happen. So, but what about all the other things that happen? I mean, spend some time mentally and kind of think through those things. What happens if I lose my job?

You while you have the job, think about what will I do when I lose my job, make a little plan, make some notes. Do I have a savings? Do I have a thing? Do I, you know, do I have another plan of action for a different job?

If something happens like Unger, they were, they just come in and go, hey, I think we're done. They were done. Do you have a little plan for that? That can help you not freak out so quick.

What if I lose my house? What am I going to do? What if my partner has sex with the llama and decides they want to leave me for B-Ste love? What are these scenarios that can happen?

Because fucking llamas have prehensile penises. They wiggle and they fuck a long time. Probably don't need Viagra. Del?

I can't look up right now. I could I could be I could be left for a llama. What am I going to do? I'm sorry.

llama's on Viagra and he just needs to be a band name. That is a good band name. You're quite good at band names. Oh, thank you very much, Mew.

Mew has given me the shut the fuck up sign. That is very good. So anyway, I don't know, for an impromptu topic, I really like how we were able to. I got some nuggets out of it.

We got some nuggets. There's some nuggets. So that's it. Try to be patient.

Take that extra pause before you freak out. And I did about us in this whole situation that's happened. I'm going to say I did about a C. I could have done better.

I could have done a lot worse. There was a lot of talks of people that were seeing a lot of shit about me and still are. And and that's OK. I know that's coming from their fear and about what's going to change for them.

And and not knowing all the answers for themselves. So having that little bit of compassion and trying not to react myself because you fuck with me, I want to fuck with you. You know, that's not going to help. And so I didn't respond in some of those ways and some of those relationships have been mended and talked through and stuff like that.

So so that's that's that. But I don't have Kathy's list. So I'm like, what am I supposed to play? Voice mail version.

Hi, it's Brenda. I just want to let you guys know random fucked up notes in World of Warcraft. According to more, the werewolf, Reese, the Morgan have bones in their decks. I play.

Wow, I didn't know that. You know, I've been reading that number. I've been reading that number for like a year and a half and finally starting to get on top of it and just checking that mailbox, checking that mailbox. And because Lex said this, hello, this is luck is currently early March.

If you're listening to this, that means you actually check the voicemail. Fucking hooray. It's still large. Thank you.

It is still March. Look, it is now mid March. And so I have checked it. But then I'm like, OK, well, I'm going to check this more.

And what do we get? By the way, kids, World of Warcraft, there's a werewolf that has the organs have dick bones. What is it the organ? The fucking organ is that a werewolf?

It's a world of Warcraft. Yeah, they get furry whenever they get in combat. Do they look like relips? Um, they have brown fur.

I don't think they have red, but they have bones in their decks. Thank you, Brenda, for letting us know that that is really important. Oh, I got to make our porn. I can't read way according to the law.

What is that number? Can you see that number? What's the first bit? Because it's 424226264242262037.

And you can leave messages like that for us and we will play them on Proverted Podcast once fucking. And now under back to you. Yeah, so in your in your once you found out, Kathy was not going to be here with an hour and a half to build a show. You reached out to the folks in Discord and more reason to be on Discord.

You get to be part of the show more. And we've had we actually had a couple of questions come in. The first one, which one of the members that's in there tonight was talking about was when couples of kinks don't collide, you're a couple. Maybe you've started off vanilla and you said, Hey, I just heard about this club locally.

Let's go check it out. And you're that couple that comes in and sits in the corner for the first night or two and people are talking to you and eventually one of you gets really into it and the other one doesn't. Oh, yes. What do you do with that?

Hold you but a good E. Let's see, meth. A little bit of meth, a little bit of meth because it makes you horny. But unfortunately for the guy, meth makes you horny and impotent at the same time.

Talk about a fucking good to know. What do you call that? An oxymoron or something fucking stupid? Yeah.

Tell him you ever smoked meth out of aluminum foil with a pen? No, because I have. And let me tell you that's no no rumor. So do that.

No, don't smoke meth. Don't smoke meth because crack tastes so much better. Smoke crack. Don't smoke crack.

And don't smoke crack in a closet for 14 and a half hours listening to the same Bob Marley CD over and over because it will like clockwork orange behavior modification. And then you won't be able to listen to Bob Marley for about five years. Don't you say that? No.

Yes. Yeah. So, um, well, I guess it kind of depends back to the question of it's like, Oh, a couple goes. One's kinky ones.

Eh, find out how much, well, I guess the person asking question would be the one that's more into it possibly find the ones that aren't like offensive. Like there's some, it's like, Oh, no, choking. This is really, I can't hurt you. Like start kind of small.

Yeah, go small. But it sounds like they've already gone past this point. It's like, yeah, I'm vanilla. And just like, or not kinky.

Yeah. Well, here's the thing. If it's not, because once again, I, you guys can call whatever you call you call. I call vanilla uninspired sex.

I don't call non kinky sex vanilla sex. So you can have a relationship where you have hot, great sex with your partner. I don't consider that vanilla because it's still hot and inspired. So I don't consider it land or lame.

But if you have a situation where two people went into the dungeon and they had sex that was not necessarily inspired and, and one of them got really peaked into kink and the other one wanted to stay uninspired. I think that now you have much greater problems because now you're, you have somebody that's really trying to open themselves up sexually and you have another part. And I've seen that in the dungeon before. That's called the supportive spouse that they come in and, and, and the, the one partner thinks this is it.

This is it. They're finally going to open up and we're going to be able to explore our sensuality and eroticism and sexuality with each other in a great way. And then after I can think of like two or three of them, like right in my face, that it happened to. And then after just like five, seven times coming, they're just like, you know what?

The people are really nice. And I understand that they're into it. I just, I don't want to do this. And just that, that crushing, you know, feeling that this person ends in some of these situations.

This is long term marriage. Kids involved. You, you, you got to decide, am I going to leave this person and this family and make these changes? How important is my sexuality?

Yeah. It reminds me of, um, another, I won't like quote it because I can't remember precisely, but another fat life post I was asking is like, if you're opening up to Polly, be prepared for it to destroy things like, sure, don't know that going into like kink either, but you may be sure considered like, if you don't both like it, you're going to end up problems. Like you might be safer being naive of like not knowing it or not. Now, and for some people that works where, okay, you can play with no sex.

Sure. So, so that's, that's a, that's a fix you're talking about. Whereas the couple, the one partner is like, I'm not into this kink at all, but maybe it's okay if you do certain things that don't challenge me or make me feel jealous or territory or whatever. Um, and this can be both male, female, doesn't, you know, uh, it doesn't matter.

It could even be for my personal case in the past, but I'll currently talk about with Aki. We both have kinks or really into that the other one has no interest in sure. Um, for example, she's big on chastity. I have no interest in that.

You don't want your dick, you don't want your dick chained up by the aginator. I have told her I will get an angle grinder. I have an angle grinder. I won't, I will pull it out and use it.

You will grind that chastity device off of said, under weens. Yes. Before that happens. That is good.

And she has a fear of clowns. No, I did not know that. That's really sad. Conflict of interest.

That is an absolute conflict. But, but we still, I mean, we've been talking for two years, eight for a year and a half, right? And everything else works out great. We have a great time and she's all fun and stuff.

And she has somebody else for the chastity thing. And you have other people for the clown thing and the various other topics that we don't have. Sure. That's an amazing thing if you can come to that conclusion.

And I've known many couples that I've played with people that are like, Hey, you can give me a spanking, but you can't fuck me or kiss me or whatever their level is. But what about the situation where it can't be worked out? Where the person's like, No, I don't want you to go do these things with other people, but I'm still, I can't do that with you or I won't do that with you, which I want to deal with the won't. Yeah.

The won't part is. Okay, this is going to be messy as most of my things are. Sometimes even if the other partner is not necessarily depending on top or bottom, maybe the person isn't into kink that much, but they love their partner. So they can, they can learn a little rope bondage or they can, they can be the rope bottom or they can service.

They can learn the service aspect of that. And of course for somebody who is, uh, you know, very dominant and they want somebody to be very vulnerable and submissive, that's not going to work. And if somebody's very submissive and they need a strong dominant, a service dominant, uh, you know, that doesn't work for them. But like you said, going back to what Del said is, you know, if you're, if it's so much that your identity is so wrapped up in your kink and who you are sexually and whatever, you're going to have a lot of misery and martyrdom and you're not going to be happy.

And some people really do have to move on from that, even if there's kids and I've seen it, you know, it doesn't mean you don't love your kids. It doesn't mean you can't raise your kids together. It doesn't mean, but it may signal that if these things are so different in you and you don't want to be miserable, then yes, some people have broken up over this. It's like you were perfect for each other at a certain point in time.

People change. So it's nothing. It's not fun. It's not your fault.

Like, yeah, I mean, your, your changes, your change. I mean, people have sucked. And then the other aspect is some people have just sucked it up and said, you know what, it's important to me, but having this relationship and, and the things that go with that relationship, it's more important. I've seen a number of people try to do that.

And after a few years, be very unhappy. And I've seen some people really focus into the relationship and then they just go away from the kink community and they say, well, yeah, it's fun to give us banking and receive us banking, but you know, it's not the end of the world. And that's where it's just non-kink and they still have inspired sex and inspired interactions with each other. It's just they don't have that kink angle.

So I really think it just comes down to, as we've talked about on the show before, you have to know, you have to look at the bigger picture. Once again, pause. Pause. Find out what you want in life in general.

Yeah. And is this something that makes you very, very unhappy and uninspired? If it doesn't inspire your life, then yes, absolutely making a change in relationship is, is an option, but you also have to count the cost. And that's sometimes not realistic.

Did we fix this conflict? Or at least I don't think it's fixed. I think it's either way. It's shitty.

It is, but we've talked about it. And it happens a lot and no one's alone in this and, you know, we'll do it. Hey, that's a good point. Support.

That's, that's, we didn't mention that. We didn't mention that. Kathy probably would have mentioned that, God damn it. Besides the whole we'll do it.

We'll have to. We'll have to. We'll have to support it. Isn't that why we're here?

Kind of. Yes. But no, it's also getting that support. And once again, another option may be role play where there's no interaction.