20. Developing a Well-Differentiated Self

In this episode, I draw from the psychology concept "differentiation of self," as defined by The Bowen Center for the Study of the Family, to share the ways in which we might struggle with differentiation in academia. According to The Bowen Center, "People with a poorly differentiated 'self' depend so heavily on the acceptance and approval of others that they either quickly adjust what they think, say, and do to please others or they dogmatically proclaim what others should be like and pressure them to conform." Many of us, through upbringing and/or academic training, struggle with differentiation of self in academia because we don't want to rock the boat,  make waves, draw attention to ourselves, etc., for fear of losing funding, not getting hired, not getting promoted, etc. I close the episode with strategies I have learned to develop a well-differentiated self in the workplace to help me with living out my own integrity, feeling comfortable with my personality, and (trying not to) give undue power to annual evaluations and promotion processes.  (Also, in talking to my therapist about my own differentiation of self, she says I am well-differentiated .... but I don't feel like I am. haha.)   As always, I would love to connect with you on LinkedIn, so feel free to connect over there.  Happy listening!