How I’m Dealing With Grief 20 Years After My Father Died | Dead Dads Podcast | Grief Support for Men

What this episode covers

How do you deal with grief 20 years after losing your dad?In this episode of Dead Dads Podcast, Mike Wasko talks about grief and loss, father loss, caregiving, therapy, bereavement, and what long-term grieving actually looks like.Mike’s dad, Bob, died 20 years ago. He is still figuring out what that means.At 29, Mike became his father’s primary caregiver after a cancer diagnosis. Then he walked out of a doctor’s appointment knowing something his dad did not, and had to decide what to do with that information.That moment changed everything.Mike talks about losing his dad, what grief looks like two decades later, and why the raw edges may dull, but the loss does not disappear. It shifts. It becomes part of the room.Annoying. But accurate.He also talks about anger, therapy, reconciliation, becoming a dad himself, and the strange way our parents show up in our kids.This is a real conversation about how to deal with grief, coping with grief and loss, grief support, dealing with death, men’s grief, family, caregiving, and why grief is not something you get over.It is something you learn to live around.If you are years out from losing your dad and still feel it, this episode is for you. If you are just starting, this is what 20 years of living with father loss can look like.It gets different. Maybe even better.🎧 In this episode, you’ll hear about:What long-term grief can look like 20 years after your dad diesHow losing your dad changes over timeWhat it feels like to become your father’s caregiver at 29Why Mike had to carry information his dad did not knowHow therapy helped him deal with grief and reframe the lossWhy grief can be understood as the cost of loving someoneWhat happens when you become a dad after losing yoursHow your father can show up in your childrenWhy grief is not something you get overMike’s crater analogy for coping with grief and loss👨‍👦 About Mike and his dad, BobMike Wasko lost his dad, Bob, after a cancer diagnosis when Mike was 29.Bob was larger than life. Intimidating. Funny. Tough. Unconventional. The kind of dad who left a mark, whether you were ready for it or not.In this episode, Mike talks about becoming his father’s caregiver, repairing their relationship before Bob died, and carrying his dad’s influence into his own life as a husband and father.It is a conversation about father loss, cancer, caregiving, therapy, grief support for men, parenting after loss, and the strange ways our dads stay with us.Also, yes, there are laughs. Because grief is weird like that. Rude, honestly.⏱️ Episode chapters0:00 – Who Is Mike Wasko?1:21 – Mike Joins the Pod: 20 Years of Grief2:34 – Why He’s Talking About It Now4:23 – Meet Bob Wasko: “Larger Than Life”6:23 – Tough Love and Unconventional Fun7:25 – The Diagnosis and a Secret to Keep13:34 – Moving In With His Dying Dad15:12 – The Falling Out and Reconciliation18:16 – Anger, Therapy, and “The Cost of Loving Someone”24:50 – Becoming a Dad and Finding His Father in Himself29:10 – His Kids Ask Why Grandpa Died31:37 – Approaching the Age His Dad Died32:28 – The Crater That Never Fills35:35 – Final Thoughts and Where to Follow🖤 About Dead DadsDead Dads is a podcast for men figuring out life after losing their dad. Hosted by Roger Nairn and Scott Cunningham, the show features honest conversations about father loss, grief, identity, family, memory, masculinity, and all the strange stuff that happens after your dad dies. No grief brochure voice. No tidy healing arc. Just real conversations for guys who are grieving, remembering, avoiding, laughing, carrying on, or trying to understand what losing a father did to them.You’re not alone.☕ If Dead Dads has helped you feel a little less alone, consider buying us a coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/deaddadspodcastFollow Dead Dads:Website: https://www.deaddadspodcast.com/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@deaddadspodcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/deaddadspodcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dead.dads.podcastSubstack: https://substack.com/@deaddadspodcastAnd listen to us here, or wherever you enjoy podcasts:Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4WWlXBPzgj151SFYRUZeSB?si=fe005fdf079249b8Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dead-dads-podcast-grief-support-for-men/id1867632438New episodes every week.Dead Dads Podcast is produced with the support of JAR Podcast Solutions, the branded podcast agency that helps organizations build shows people actually want to spend time with. Learn more at https://jarpodcasts.com/

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