210: Be Careful Where You Squat episode artwork

EPISODE · May 27, 2026 · 35 MIN

210: Be Careful Where You Squat

from The Shallow End · host Schnebly and Toth

Two grown men attempt to answer life’s biggest questions:How far should you go to retrieve your car keys from a porta-potty?How many beers does it take before 911 becomes Coors Light customer service?And exactly where should you not squat in the English countryside? In this hilariously disastrous episode of The Shallow End, JG and Lindsay dive headfirst into a collection of true stories involving terrible decisions, public humiliation, emergency responders, stinging nettles, and one unforgettable porta-potty rescue that became instant American folklore. From a Pennsylvania man trapped inside a portable toilet while attempting to recover his keys… to an Idaho bar patron who called 911 twelve times over a $30 beer tab… to a listener story involving painful botanical consequences in the Lake District of England — this episode celebrates the universal human ability to look directly at a bad idea and say, “Yeah… I can still make this work.” Expect ridiculous true news stories, dark observational humor, bizarre real-life mishaps, drunken logic, and the kind of cautionary tales that make you feel dramatically better about your own life choices. If you enjoy absurd comedy podcasts, embarrassing true stories, weird news, awkward survival tales, and conversations that sound like two lifelong friends trying to outdo each other with increasingly terrible decisions, this episode belongs in your ears immediately. Topics include: porta-potty rescue stories, drunk 911 calls, bizarre news, embarrassing accidents, stinging nettles, terrible decision-making, true comedy stories, weird America, bar disasters, and listener confessions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Two grown men attempt to answer life’s biggest questions:How far should you go to retrieve your car keys from a porta-potty?How many beers does it take before 911 becomes Coors Light customer service?And exactly where should you not squat in the English countryside? In this hilariously disastrous episode of The Shallow End, JG and Lindsay dive headfirst into a collection of true stories involving terrible decisions, public humiliation, emergency responders, stinging nettles, and one unforgettable porta-potty rescue that became instant American folklore. From a Pennsylvania man trapped inside a portable toilet while attempting to recover his keys… to an Idaho bar patron who called 911 twelve times over a $30 beer tab… to a listener story involving painful botanical consequences in the Lake District of England — this episode celebrates the universal human ability to look directly at a bad idea and say, “Yeah… I can still make this work.” Expect ridiculous true news stories, dark observational humor, bizarre real-life mishaps, drunken logic, and the kind of cautionary tales that make you feel dramatically better about your own life choices. If you enjoy absurd comedy podcasts, embarrassing true stories, weird news, awkward survival tales, and conversations that sound like two lifelong friends trying to outdo each other with increasingly terrible decisions, this episode belongs in your ears immediately. Topics include: porta-potty rescue stories, drunk 911 calls, bizarre news, embarrassing accidents, stinging nettles, terrible decision-making, true comedy stories, weird America, bar disasters, and listener confessions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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210: Be Careful Where You Squat

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This episode was published on May 27, 2026.

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Two grown men attempt to answer life’s biggest questions:How far should you go to retrieve your car keys from a porta-potty?How many beers does it take before 911 becomes Coors Light customer service?And exactly where should you not squat in the...

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