212. Navigating Infertility, Disenfranchised Grief, and Relationship Survival with Dr. Clay Brigance

Drop me a message or voice note!Grief doesn't always look like loss of a person. Sometimes, it looks like losing a dream. In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Clay Brigance, an Infertility Counseling Expert, professional counselor, researcher, and host of the Love and Infertility podcast, for one of the most powerful conversations I've had on this show. We're talking about infertility and pregnancy loss as a grief experience. The kind that so often goes unnamed, unseen, and completely unsupported.Dr. Clay brings both the clinical expertise and the deeply personal experience to this conversation. He and his wife navigated male-factor infertility, IVF, a traumatic birth, and a hysterectomy—and came out the other side with a whole lot of wisdom, purpose, and a marriage that's stronger for it. Here's what we dig into:✨ Why infertility is a grief experience, and why so few people recognize it as one✨ The "reproductive story" we all start building around age 2 or 3, and what happens when it gets torn apart✨ Dr. Clay's four pillars of connection, and why some couples grow closer through infertility while others fall apart✨ The "crescendo effect" that builds stress in relationships and what to do when your amygdala takes over✨ Well-intended chivalry, and why trying to rescue your partner from their pain actually makes things worse✨ Two practical tools: reverse engineering your conversations and the boardroom method for getting in touch with your emotions✨ How to navigate the painful "at least" comments from well-meaning family and friends✨ The grief that comes with relationships, learning who can truly hold space for you, and letting go of those who can'tWhether you're in the thick of an infertility journey, have experienced pregnancy loss, or love someone who has, this conversation is for you.Connect with Clay:https://www.drclaybrigance.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_claybrigance/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/Shiloh-Counseling-LLC-100090955350701/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/clayton-brigance-phd-lpc-99a4381a4Learn more about Letters of Light 💌✨ https://lossesbecomegains.com/lettersSupport the showLetters of Light 💌✨ https://lossesbecomegains.com/lettersSupport the podcast: https://buymeacoffee.com/lifewithgriefpodcast📖 Life Beyond Grief Substack: https://taraaccardo.substack.com/Connect with me:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lossesbecomegains/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lifewithgriefpodcast/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/losses.become.gainsWebsite: https://lossesbecomegains.com/Work with me one-on-one: https://lossesbecomegains.com/work-with-taraShop the LBG Daily Journal: https://lossesbecomegains.com/journalBy accessing this Podcast, I acknowledge that the entire contents are the property of Tara Accardo, or used by Tara Accardo with permission. Except as otherwise provided herein, users of this Podcast may save and use information contained in the Podcast only for personal or other non-commercial, educational purpo...