22. The Bothched Contract Killings .

When a contract killing goes wrong, it usually isn’t because of a brilliant detective—it’s because the criminals are astonishingly incompetent, hopelessly romantic, or just profoundly lazy. In this episode of Blood Money and Bones, we are unpacking three infamous true crime cases where hitmen completely botched the job in the most ridiculous ways possible. What’s on the slab today: The $500 Ketchup Alibi (Brazil): A hitman is hired to eliminate a romantic rival, falls head-over-heels in love with his target instead, and stages her execution using a cheap bottle of grocery store ketchup and a poorly placed machete. Hitman Inception (China): What happens when contract killing gets corporate-style outsourcing? A hilarious, cascading five-tier pyramid scheme of lazy assassins who keep passing the buck until the budget dries up entirely. The Funeral Crasher (Australia/Burundi): A grieving woman is kidnapped by hitmen who refuse to kill her due to their strict moral code. Instead, they let her go, allowing her to pull up in a taxi and crash her very own funeral wake—much to her plotting husband's absolute horror. Grab your favorite drink, lock your doors, and whatever you do... don’t trust your spouse! Please don't commit any crimes this week, and if you absolutely must, at least promise us you won't outsource your hitman budget. New episodes drop every single Wednesday! Follow us on Spotify, leave a 5-star rating, and tell us in the comments who your favorite flavor of incompetent criminal was today. Gmail :- [email protected] Instagram :- https://www.instagram.com/blood_moneyandbones?igsh=MW9taXhmYjhnMWI5dw%3D%3D&utm_source=qr "Cool Vibes" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ #BotchedContracts #TrueCrimePodcast #TrueCrimeComedy #HitmanInception #PodcastWednesday #SpotifyTrueCrime #TrueCrimeCommunty #Mystery