23. Lindsey Metselaar of We Met at Acme: The State of Dating in 2025

In this episode, Sam sits down with Lindsey Metselaar, host of the popular dating and relationships podcast We Met at Acme. They talk alllll about the state of dating in 2025, from Lindsey's dating "rules," to the impact of technology on dating, to dating while sober, love languages, attachment styles, situationships, and beyond. Listen to this episode if you are single and dating in 2025, or if you're in a relationship and want to set yourself up for success. Key moments:00:01:33 The story of how Sam got her raspy/low voice lol (this went viral on TikTok) 00:03:21 How Sam and Lindsey met 00:05:16 How Lindsey became a dating expert 00:07:48 Lindsey’s rules of dating (don’t text “thank you” after a date!) 00:11:33 How many dates you should wait to sleep with them (according to Lindsey) 00:13:15 Why you should have no more than 2 drinks on a first date 00:13:29 How and why you should try sober dating 00:15:49 The difference between drinking while dating vs. dating sober (Sam and Lindsey’s personal experiences) 00:19:52 Lindsey’s advice for dating sober 00:21:19 Dating and tech (apps, AI, porn, and more) 00:22:01 This Forbes survey showed 98% of people met dates online 00:22:41 How we can build our online profiles and social identities to optimize for dating success 00:24:16 How tech has influenced the dating landscape 00:25:51 Do dating apps actually work? 00:26:42 Hinge origin story (sorta lol) 00:27:29 Is dating tech making people bad at dating/socializing/flirting IRL? 00:28:12 Is technology affecting people’s interest in commitment? 00:30:44 Are you using AI to flirt by text? Click here 00:33:00 The quote that made Lindsey famous 00:33:22 Porn, OnlyFans, Instagram models, and more 00:35:54 The bottom line on tech and dating 00:37:56 The narrative around men online (i.e. man vs. bear) 00:40:09 Incels, incel forums, and Adolescence (spoilers!) 00:45:15 A shift in dating trends between 2024 and 2025 00:47:41 Therapy speak (gaslighting, narcissism, etc.) 00:48:01 Love languages 00:52:01 Attachment styles (anxious attachment and avoidant attachment) 00:54:08 Situationships and how to avoid them/get out of them 00:57:09 Setting yourself up to find The One 00:59:18 Girlfriend and wife (or partner) privileges 01:01:59 How to know if they’re The One 01:04:21 Setting your relationship up for a healthy marriage 01:05:55 What Lindsey wishes she knew when she was 25 and dating Thanks for listening! New episodes are released every Sunday at 8 AM EST, so if you liked this episode, subscribe or follow to get notified about the next one. And please leave me a rating or review, so I can continue to improve the show. Talk soon! Get up to 15% off at ⁠NIRA⁠. Visit ⁠Zocdoc.com/CAPSLOCK⁠. Visit FunctionHealth.com/CAPSLOCK. Follow along: Instagram: ⁠www.instagram.com/lifeincapslock⁠  TikTok: ⁠www.tiktok.com/@lifeincapslock⁠  YouTube: ⁠www.youtube.com/@lifeincapslock⁠  Threads: ⁠www.threads.net/@lifeincapslock⁠  Resources for this episode can be found here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices