#231: Why You Can't Love Someone Into Changing

In this episode, we explore the belief that if someone truly loved you, they would have changed — and why this story so often keeps people stuck in self-blame, rescuing, and self-abandonment. We look at the saviour complex, how it develops, and why real change has far more to do with timing and capacity than with how lovable or devoted you are.In this episode, we cover:Why “if they loved me, they would’ve changed” is such a convincing storyHow the saviour complex shows up in relationshipsThe line between compassion and self-abandonmentWhy people change when they’re ready — not when we love harderIf this resonates, you can register for my free training on healing anxious attachment here.