#234 Masculinity, Anger, and Men's Healing (with Matt Musgrave)

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, I chat with Matt Musgrave. Matt is the Principal Counsellor & Founder of Strong Space Counselling, an online group counselling practice specialising in supporting the mental health of men and fathers. With nearly a decade of experience in community services, including work as a probation and parole officer and facilitating men’s behavior change programs for those who used violence and coercive control in relationships, Matt brings a wealth of expertise and a unique perspective to his clinical practice. He is IFS (Internal Family Systems) Level 1 trained, feminist-informed, and gender-affirming, offering a deeply compassionate and inclusive approach to counselling. Matt empowers men to lead healthier, more authentic lives by fostering self-awareness and self-compassion as the primary foundations of his therapeutic methodology. Key points: Matt's background and expertise Matt introduces himself as a men's mental health counselor running an online private practice in Australia. He has a background in history, domestic family violence, men's behavior change, probation/parole, and criminology. His main passions are working with men on trauma healing and supporting fathers/new dads. Navigating masculinity in male-dominated environments Matt reflects on the "hyper-masculine" cultures he experienced growing up and in his previous roles, where there was an "absence of alternative" expressions of masculinity. He describes the challenges of questioning and challenging these norms, and how he was often "bullied or pushed back into the box" of traditional stereotypes. Anger as a common emotion for men Matt observes that anger is a very accessible emotion for many of the men he works with, often used as a way to feel "in control" and "empowered" when dealing with hurt or trauma. He emphasizes the importance of creating space for men to fully experience and process their anger, rather than just trying to down-regulate it. Navigating the landscape of men's mental health support Matt shares his perspective on the challenges of advocating for more funding and resources for men's mental health, noting the complexities of comparing it to support for women. He expresses concerns about approaches that perpetuate rigid gender norms, and emphasizes the importance of creating spaces that allow men to explore masculinity in a more open and authentic way. Gendered approaches in therapy Matt explains that he takes a gender-affirming approach when working with men, drawing on his own experiences and training to better empathize with and support the unique challenges men face. He notes the importance of his team also doing their own personal work to show up in a more connected and compassionate way. Relevant links: Matt's Instagram: @strongspacecounselling