#2507 - Harland Williams

The Joe Rogan experience To each of us here with Donald Trump was here. Wow, I've made my day. It was important doesn't matter what side it does No, there we go. Oh, wow these are nice. Demetrius. Nick. Yeah, tape or yes. Oh, that's right. Okay, boy. Yeah

What's going on with your face? What are you doing? Ah? This is a tight one for me today guy Feeling right what is that it says Betty Billy Billy Obi L. L. Y. Oh, it's a

It's a memorial tattoo. I don't know if you knew this or not, but uh my uh My kid got hit by a truck. When did you have a kid about two years ago? I haven't told anyone I Was ashamed it was a one-night stand Kid is it a human kid? Yeah Billy You get hit by a truck got hit by a truck. Was he just walking? Well someone and I won't say who left the gate open and

He wandered out into the street and Boom like hit by a 18-wheeler and this is like a memorial. So you got Billy tattooed on your forehead I have two tattoos. I got Billy on my forehead and I got a tattoo of his little face over my heart. It's it really? Yeah First of all what happened to the one when you were attacked by the bear that healed up. This is Billy

Billy Goat is a kid. Yeah, yeah poor little guy poor little guy. He was a service animal I thought he was your son. Well, he was my boy. He was a kid, but he said he got him out of a one-night stand Well that girl sold him to me was a service animal. Yeah

It sucks dude, and you know what sucks. He was hit by a truck that was hauling medical supplies. Okay, how ironic right? He's laying there and to watch your kid bleed to death He's just laying on the pavement like Just bleeding to death amazing was still alive well He I couldn't believe it he was alive and a respirator rolled out of the back of the truck a life-saving device and crushed his stupid his crushed his head So he's killed not by the truck but by the final blow of the respirator landing on him right so the irony odds Well, this is the irony in life Joe like he got hit by the truck might have survived a Respirator rolled out of the back these things way a good half ton lands on the itty on the kid's face and Gone So memorial tattoos well, you're a good guy. I was a good one. I hate him. Is that right? Yeah, how does goat taste?

I'm good at it. It's pretty good. Yeah, wait you have sure first time ever had it was in LA Mexican spot they still they were selling goat tacos. They were delicious. Oh my god Yeah, and then I had a neighbor well non-neighbor who's a landscaper that was a friend of mine that would he would fight chickens They'd do chicken fights cockfight. Yeah, I've had those trying to be polite cleaning up for the viewers

Well, okay, chicken fights. Talk is kind of the technical names wrong. Yeah, you're saying it have you ever I like I say anyway, they would roast a goat. He told me whenever they would do a cockfight. Yeah better. Well, it's not for me

It's for the culture for the culture. Yeah, I mean it is what it is Fight actually I wonder how you say it in Spanish because he's a cocko so anyway He lived in this neighborhood. You would swear to god that it was Mexico It was crazy like every time I was in Spanish all the people were in Spanish. There's roosters everywhere. He just on his street You're here Like all day long it was like it was crazy and so he had his friend of mine friend of his rather He went to the we went to the backyard in the backyard There's just stacks and stacks of rooster cages. They had so many roosters and they had these prized roosters and they had a whole pit

So they had a thing it was almost like a barn looking area and you go in there and there's a pit a cock pit And then that's where they're fighting it was showing me where they would roast a goat He said every time they would have a cockfight they'd roast a goat and everybody have beers and well If you're gonna have a cockfight you might as well roasted goat That's what I said But if I had a cock putt in my backyard I'd get it like a Delta pilot and an American Airlines pilot and toss them in And let them fight it out let them fight it out in the cockpit Oh, you think would win? Probably Delta because they have the DEI program do they yeah or in this case the DI the DEI program Because someone ain't coming out alive Well, I think we need pilots So maybe you should do it with someone that's like overrepresented in the marketplace Like what would be like we could get rid of some of those folks who we could single out yeah Yeah, I would be like without enough. There's too many of you guys. Yeah Politicians yeah, yeah. Oh yeah homeless advocates. I'd love to see politicians getting a pit and fight right yeah

Two men into a man leave I mean that had a how it went down a long time ago. Yeah long time ago Oh, you're talking like cavemen years in tribal days tribal day. Yeah, probably had a fight Yeah, I think my opponents piece of shit you want to steal all the coconuts. Yeah. Yeah, well I think I think back then the hierarchy worked based on physical dominance Intimidation like you'd be a good leader. You got you got you jacked

Yeah, I'm not a good leader though because I feel like you gotta do what you want to do I'm not really interested in running this place. I gotta get out of here Yeah, yeah, because once you decide you're running it you're stuck with everything yeah, and all the problems your problems Wow, and then everyone wants to kill you like who the fuck would want to be president? This is why voting for president is a real problem. Yeah, like in 2028. It was like who's gonna win in 2028?

Who's gonna win who's gonna run who wants a fucking job? What normal healthy person wants that job where at least half the country's gonna fucking hate you and the people that you got in They've got you in like they're not gonna be happy because you're gonna be able to do what you're saying you want to do It's not even possible. What'd you just put up? Politicians fought literally with fists cane swords and pistols and some famous ones were killed or badly injured in these clashes 1700s 1800s dueling was a common way for gentlemen and politicians defend their honor in Europe in the United States That would be sick if congressman, you know if like on they start screaming yelling each other like they always do yeah I challenge you to a duel everyone's like oh Let's fucking go out on the White House lawn Jackson killed Charles Dickinson. Yeah The author was wounded himself 50. That's not the author. No. No, no, no. No, no. I mean that's Dickens. That's Dickens

Okay, I mean that's a bad review for a book when you go you piece of shit. I didn't like Tom Sawyer boom Dickens right Tom Sawyer or Huck Finn. No, no, no that was some King Sammy Clemens Mark Twain. Yeah, what the hell did Dickens right? Oh, I don't remember the Christmas one Christmas one the Grinch Grinch the stole all of it to a Christmas carols I think of baby copper field great expectations this episode is brought to you by uber eats hockey seasons here and uber eats is delivering game-day deals on favorites like wings pizza fries and snacks and you can order more than food like gear to rep your team or Fresh batteries for the remote when your watch party gets hungry or you just need anything Order in and keep everyone's attention on the ice score great deals on uber eats all season long because hockey is for the hungry Terms apply product availability varies by region see app for details this episode is brought to you by square space if you're thinking about building a website

You should try square space. I know because I use it. That's right Joe Rogan calm is powered by square space It has all the features that you need to create a standout website like an AI enhanced website builder SEO optimization tools and seamless checkouts with mobile Pay links head to square space calm slash Rogan for a free trial And when you are ready to launch use the offer code Rogan to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain in 2002 Ryan wedding with an olympics snowboarder at the top of his game Ryan style is really gun it and go and in less than a minute It's slipped away, but he continued to chase the high Ryan James wedding He controls one of the most violent drug trafficking organizations in this world I'm Michelle Shepard and from CDC podcasts and the Toronto star the most wanted Olympian the most wanted Olympian available now on Spotify Oh, he wrote that Christmas girls last thing Okay, he was great stuff what year was put that thing up again about the duels because So Jackson killed someone in a 206 ones he president

Later later Wow, so he shot someone and then became president. He was a murderer and became president at 1804 JV inch going out shooting the treasury secretary right now. Well, this is crazy. They had a pistol duel with the treasury secretary Hamilton was mortally wounded and died the next day crazy It ended this guy burrs political career and scroll back up again and Aaron Burr So as the vice president Aaron Burr shot the fucking treasury secretary That's crazy former treasure secretary and killed him and then it ended his career even in 1804 They were like that's outrageous. Yeah, it was not crazy. That was just the 1800s. Yeah 200 years ago. They were shooting each other and America's all about guns

So why don't we just doing that now it would end a lot of like really shitty conversations? Yeah, a lot of people they talk in a way They say horrible mean things because they know there's no repercussions Yeah, if they could just challenge you to a fist fight on the Senate floor. That was a thing. Yeah, which changed a lot 1856 Representative Preston Brooks of South Carolina ended the US Senate chamber and brutally beat Senator Charles summer of Massachusetts With a cane after summer gave an anti-slavery speech that insulted Brooks cousin Summer was left unconscious and badly injured whoa Well because he gave an anti-slavery speech imagine why'd you hit the guys against slavery? Oh, yeah Did you use a weapon at least yeah, I used a cane against slavery. What do I do just let him be against slavery? Yeah?

He insulted my cousin the slave owner Wow. Well, you know America is like kind of built on golf gun culture So it sort of seems to fit you know also combat like thank you It's just a little more it's like violence. Yeah, you have seen the White House lawn. Yeah That seems like a good safe place to be huh? Everyone's gonna know world world leaders gonna be we're all gonna be yeah Sit in that spot for six hours calling fight. You're gonna be there right super safe. You're gonna completely safe

You're gonna be there right? Yeah, I'm gonna be there. Do you like the concept of it or no? I do not like it I'm calm guy because it's outside and I think world championship fight should be in a controlled environment Yeah, I'd respect for the athletes and how difficult it is to compete professionally in a world title However, yeah, I should say however, it's gonna be a spectacle whether I was there or not I would be watching a hundred percent Yeah, it's I think it's awesome that Trump. This is one of things I like about him. He's like fuck it

Let's do it. Yeah, he puts on cage fights on the White House. Yeah nuts. Yeah, yeah, we just wild shit I like that. Yeah, I don't like the Iran war thing, but I like that you don't like the concept that I ran can no longer have Nuclear weapons. I think that's better than a UFC fight that is a good concept

However, I don't necessarily know there's a clear way to get out of this and if you know what we didn't have Afghanistan for 20 years And how much American tax payer dollars? Yeah, I don't think people lost their lives But in Afghanistan, it felt like they were just sweeping out like goat farmers and guys hiding in caves Whereas here there's a directive where they're preventing a rebel country from having a bomb that could annihilate portions of our planet That's true. I think that's a much clearer and more positive agenda than wipe-out guys living in the hills of Afghanistan Creating opium. That's true if it made sense the problem is I It's got Horton on the podcast explaining what is actually involved in making depleted uranium and making weapons great And what would have to be done in order to get it to a bomb level?

It's very difficult, right? It's not is simple and they weren't nearly capable of doing that not nearly but pursuing It's a good question being he was also saying they were being inspected on a regular basis and essentially This is Israel wanting us to go to this war. Yeah, Israel wants that and it makes sense if I was Israel if we were America Yeah, Mexico had nukes pointed at us or whatever It's not nukes, but you know I'm saying like if they did if they were trying to build a nuke if Mexico and America were Constantly in conflict and Mexico was trying to build a nuclear bomb That would be a good reason where I America would want to go fuck up Mexico. Okay. You can't have a nuclear bomb This is Israel's position right Israel's right there when you run they're close enough to throw missiles at each other I get why they want it. I just don't know it's a good thing for America

And I don't know if there's a way out of it Well, I think what we have to look at is the bigger scope if not America cleaning it up Who does it who has the power and the wherewithal to do it? You know, we've used like two-thirds of our missiles doing it Abit we leave this vulnerable if there's any other kind of a conflict we're like under armed right now I don't think we're ever under armed when we have our trite and submarine force lurking in the oceans 24-7 and nobody knows They're there even members of American military. What do you know? How do you know this? Oh, I know things guys Billy. Tell you this Billy Billy's dead. Wait a minute. Do you know something about these trite and submarine?

I sure do what you know well there there's there's circumnavigating our oceans 24-7 how many other I think there's a fleet of 12 to 24? I think it's closer to 12, but these things can stay underwater for up to a year and Most members of our American government don't even know they're there. They don't know where they are how much underwater jerk And off is going on right now. Well think about it one trite and submarine trite and submarine has how many guys on it? I don't know how many guys, but it has something like 24 nuclear warheads and how many?

Warhead has 24 that break off so one of these submarines could take out half the world and we've got them going all the time So whenever you're afraid of any little hot spot in the world Just remember that we have this going on in the ocean a lot of people don't know about it I like you say this we shit when you're Canadian. Yeah, interesting. Yeah when the shit hits the fan Canadians like to pretend they're American So I'm just not worried like I'm not worried about America ever being vulnerable. It's it's an area It's it's the anautical force that you don't really hear about but if you were to look it up There's this there's this force out there that could take out the world Jamie just looked it up US Navy submarine force today consists of about 53 a fast track of fast attack submarines 14 ballistic missile submarines and four guided missile submarines all nuclear powered That yields a total of roughly 70 to 71 nuclear submarines in the force making it the world's largest nuclear submarine fleet Why currently in the oceans is classified except for people who talked to Harlan exactly Harlan knows the exact number of you US nuclear submarines At sea at any moment and their locations are classified for operational security

The Navy does not release real-time deployment figures public discussion instead uses overall force in general deployment concepts like continuous SSBN deterrent patrols rather than day-by-day counts Okay, that makes me feel a little better Well, you need not worry and that's you didn't even tap into the Trident the Trident's are the nuclear ones that run silent So you're you're pro you can't go That's that's pinging that's sonar. What do you mean? You can't use sonar? You can't ping them. They're nuclear. They're silent

They're silent predators in the ocean really they're huge and I told you one one nuclear warhead splits off into 16 or 24 So one of these one of these damn Trident submarines could put anyone in its place at any time So don't you worry about our missiles being depleted mr. Joe Zachary I know about submarines. I know about your middle name. Okay Encourate open sources Trident submarines usually means us Navy Ohio class ballistic missile submarines They carry Trident to D5 nuclear missiles and there are 14 of these boats There you go and so these boats are just floating around ready to fuck people up So do you think it was a good idea to go anyway Ron start bombing?

I think whoever's the bad player. I think it's a good idea. It was North Korea Iran Israel Canada Mexico Whoever's causing shit in the world. We don't have time for you. Let's get on let's get in line Let's all work together or you get a timeout. We don't we don't time for this anymore

We're a society of sophisticated human beings. We got to move forward there. I am sonar guy Okay, you dude. That's that's me on a Trident. That's what you doing your spare time. Yeah, right around the world protecting things

You die your hair before you go into there Don't memory when you start doing that. Right. What movie was that in down periscope? Yeah, but this is real guy. So I'm just saying to you don't ever fret. Okay. There's no one on earth that can threaten America

I did not eleven happen then well that that was land-based That was terrestrial and that was simple planning and box cutting and hijacking and we're talking about global warfare nuclear war Let's say Moscow launched and hit seven of our cities tomorrow. Well, guess what Moscow? Damny seven at eight chydney submarine waiting just off shore for you This episode is brought to you by Amazon MGM Studios new movie masters of the universe only in theaters June 5th You all remember he man, right? You got a huge 80s icon the sword of power Skeletor the whole thing they brought it back as this big live action movie and the cast is pretty wild Nicholas Galatine Camilla Mendez Allison Brie Reina Baccarin and Idris Elba just to name a few after being separated for 15 years the sword of power leads Prince Adam played by Galatine back to Eternia where he discovers his home shattered under the fiendish rule of Skeletor for the hardcore fans

We finally get to see the world of Eternia to save his family and the world Adam must join forces with his closest allies Tila and Duncan man at arms and embrace his true destiny the most powerful man in the universe This is one of those movies that feels made for the biggest screen out there big action big world even bigger characters Masters of the universe is only in theaters June 5th. Don't miss it get tickets now at masters of the universe dot movie Right, but there's no one left here to celebrate because we're all dead. It doesn't matter America doesn't lose is what I'm trying to tell you My god, we still win when everyone's dead. Yeah, it's still win the guys floating around in the Indian Ocean in the Atlantic and the North Sea So those sailors will be the new civilization America We didn't see them when they lose my guy. Maybe that's why the aliens are under the water Maybe they're the ones that survived you believe that apocalypse. Yeah, I don't know about the aliens under the water Tim Burchette was on this podcast

Well, what does he know he said that there are three they say three bases or five when you're last names bullshit? No, no, what is it over Chet over Chet? He's a very honest man. So what did he say? He said that there's these three locations?

I think it's three three or five. Okay, remember hang on. Let me tell you five So he said this is these spots under the ocean where regularly they have these events where things come out of the ocean When you say things are we talking giant squid are we talking extraterrestrial? They're talking crafts that move in a way that we can't right now 500 miles an hour under the water They're trans medium and then go above the ground and in the water with no it doesn't seem like it's causing them any resistance Yeah, we're shet there said there are five underwater bases in some reports It's it's phrases five or six what the clearest reporting says he pointed to five areas in the US waters where such bases could be So they there's a bunch of areas in the ocean and if you think you're gonna hide something Yeah, where you would hide it. We can't we don't go in the ocean that much right on But we don't know the ocean it hasn't been mapped I think we've only mapped less than 10% of the ocean floor You know more about the surface of the moon than we knew no, but yeah, correct And so when they're if they were here that would be the place to hide just go to the deepest parts of the ocean We're no one can go. Yeah, and you build bases because if they can travel here from another planet

Yeah, James Cameron went to the bottom of the mariana trench. We yeah Fascinating so he did that in 2012 if he can do that for sure something that can come here from another planet can also go down there And most likely set up a base. I'm skeptical I'm not denying it, but I'm thinking if you're an extraterrestrial and you're coming to a planet like ours What's the upside of going deep down into a trench that's I think it's what three four five miles deep the arioli trench Huh ariola thing around your tits the tip Probably maybe not the new yesterday trailer. I did Steven Spielberg's in it. Yeah, he's saying first of all broke up your nails You're freaking me out. Oh wow. He's a rose picker some people keep them long to get boogers

Spielberg probably likes to pull out a crank out a greenie boy That's your Spielberg laying in bed at night just cranking out a greenie and eating it So he said that he believes that we are being visited much. I don't think he does that He's a respect like those nails over bigger picking nails. It's just too busy to trim his nails I don't know he probably could have someone trim my dirty booger nails. You think that's what it looks like an eye-eye almost What if we had like one long coke nail? What if you had like one long pink like an eye eye?

I'm like a fucking coke nail, bro. You ever seen an eye eye those dudes they grow the pinky nail long to let everybody know they do coke pull up an Eye-eye Jamie, what does I mean? You'll see in a second dr. coke nail. She's a YE a YE Maybe that ink from the tattoo that I'll show the show on the middle finger of the eye eye So they have an elongated middle digit then they stick that deep down into the coconuts and melons and that's a Spielberg hook right there That's Spielberg at night laying in his waterbed picking greenies. I think he does. I think he does

I think he does one in his beard right there. I feel bad that I brought it up. Look there's the hand. Oh I I Hmm and isn't it interesting Joe if we go full circle if you're down into tried and submarine and the captain says press X 5 7 2 and obliterate Iran right now the operator would go II sir. I don't think they say that I think so you're Roger Well, the guy's name is Roger. Why did he say Roger? Huh?

Why do they say that name like it's not make Roger was based off of the Jolly Roger the flag That was skull and cross bone so the nautical term Roger came from that Jolly Roger Yeah, but the military uses that too Roger that right but they adopted it from the Navy let's find out that's true. Yeah, what is Roger the term Roger that where does that come from? I'm looking at up. Do you know why pirates were an eye patch? Yes, they're fucking high off. No. Oh, so they could see better a distance at night under the ship right? Yeah, it's for

When you know light when you get accustomed to darkness the more why does why does having one eye closed? So do they put the patch over the other eye when they go under at night? Yeah, you switch They switch eyes so they never have to get adjusted to the dark. Well, that's crazy. Yes Roger has to do with Morse code That is actually kind of amazing. What a small move you put one patch over your eye during the daytime and one patch at night

And you know we see yeah Originally stood for the letter R which is used as shorthand for received in Morse code. Yeah, early radio So saying Roger means I received your message right? And it also hankers back to the skull and cross bones the Jolly Roger pull that up. I think it does Yeah, it is. It's a derivative of the cranial area of the the tibby the tibby is across the cranial mm-hmm Jamie doesn't believe you know what's going on with Jamie laughs. I know something's up

What is a Jolly Roger? No the Roger and radio talk and the Roger and Jolly Roger come from different traditions Yeah, and they're not historically connected Do you think this is maybe top secret information that you know and maybe just made a mistake by telling the whole world? Can I answer it with? You've just been sonar player so imagine if there was a super sophisticated Intelligent civilization that existed way before hours like 30,000 years ago And then they had developed underwater travel space travel all that jazz then the apocalypse comes The only ones that survive are the tried-and-summer you guys that are in the ocean, right? Maybe that's why all these bases are in the ocean Maybe they'll the last remaining survivors of a super advanced civilization that existed thousands and thousands of years before like Mesopotamia But my point to you joke in point valid valid I'm gonna play that he's gonna play I'm not even refuting it But I'm gonna roll it around the old Canadian roll it around and I'm gonna come back at you With an argument that if I'm an intelligent life force and I've got this sphere with oceans and land

Why do I want to make life harder for myself? Do you know the pressure that you're at a three miles down in the ocean the amount of pressure that kind of look what happened to that little That little submarine that popped about three years ago, right? So why do you want to live in an environment where you have so much pressure when you could simply land on the terrestrial plane and live pressure free? Because if they are insanely advanced one of the things that's proposed is that they have some sort of a gravity bubble And this is how they move through space and this is how they don't use propulsion that they essentially through space that's why these crafts act as trans-medium crafts when these crafts are flying and going to the ocean the ocean There's virtually no splash and they're moving 500 miles frictionless exactly They're not they're not existing in the same space time as we are they have a bubble and this bubble completely distorts everything around So you're saying if they descend it into the depths of our ocean they won't experience the pressure exactly because the bubble is Forcing off the pressure interesting, but still okay What is your purpose for going underwater when you could just land on the surface of the earth?

Maybe they're observing us and making sure that we don't fuck things up But how can they observe us if there are three miles underwater? Well, they come out of the water Harlan That's the whole reason why they know they're there because they keep experiencing these crafts that are rising out of the water in these very specific locations Yeah, you seem like a disinformation agent from the government or something I am I am it seems like it I am you should work out and being a little more stealthy What do you mean because it's very obvious to me that you're what the kids call controlled opposition? Well, that could be me counter intuitably pre-programming you to think sideways Will be the benefit of that. I'm not experiencing these ways of espionage What's the benefit of living a mile down in the ocean in the area?

I left I think the whole reason they're in the oceans because that's where we won't find them if you wanted to watch Like a civilization if we went to another planet, okay, let's say this we let's say we go to another planet We find people that are living like cave people they're killing each other with some years They're you know robbing and raiding villages if we wanted to just observe and we had the ability to observe from the sky motionless with no Sound at all and just watch them don't you think we would do that? Yeah, we wouldn't interfere We would want to know as much about them as we could right every now and then when one of them was going to get water We fucking dart them with a tranquilizer dart check their DNA take some jizz and then leave them there Just like they do to us we would do the exact same stuff if we could do it if we were just a little more advanced than we are now So not you know millions of years in advance, which we think maybe possibly some civilizations are but maybe a hundred years or a thousand years And we found a planet and that planet had cave people on it 100% We would do most of the things that these aliens are doing if we had a way where we could dart them and tranquilize them And they have no idea that we did it and they would just wake up at the jungle confused

We would do it if we did medical tests on them We could take them bring them to a secure medical facility that we had maybe in a helicopter or some sort of a spaceship that we've created And we run some tests on them take some sperm take some skin samples do a fucking CAT scan on them Whatever and then put them back in the jungle. We would do it. Oh wait. This isn't mutual of Omaha's wild kingdom We're not wild a beast. We're not seals like clearly they share some of the intelligence. We have their masters of aeronautics

We've mastered aeronautics in our physical plane So what's with all the mystery like if they can communicate and they can talk and they can build where to as we can It's not like no, we're too primitive. Why don't they just how do you know that because if Let's go chat to the idiots. No before that dumb at least we could communicate I think you have to get our fighter jets fly with their fire our fighter decks track them We lock on to them. So we're sharing Intelligence no no no they're not so so they're trying to find them and then they dart away right moving ways that we can't explain We see them we track them. We share the same airspace. We're both flying. I don't know why I'm getting so fired up

Yeah, but still dude if we went to another planet and found Australia pithicus we found an early human You know one of the early primates, okay 100% we would dart it 100% we would tranquilize We would run tests on it. We would want to know about it 100% Okay, you're talking about in the and or thaw but that's what we are to them But let's say little grays with the big heads and they communicate telepathically and they could fly here instantaneously from other solar systems We might as well be the ape people But why the evasion like if you saw a homo pickethis or whatever it's called Holding up a cell phone would you still go? Let's dart it and probe it and let it go. I want you to go. Hey that monkeys got a cell phone Let's go talk to it we can talk we have cell phones like why the why the mysterious distance like if they're in the ocean and they know we're Intelligent beings why not just come up and say hey anyone want to go snorkeling?

I think Australia pithicus with a spear is about as intelligent to us as we are to them But if they have an evolved language and they have communities and a civilization isn't that enough for us to just walk in the camp and go Hey guys, I mean they did it with with track with you know Tribes that live in the Amazon who's that guy? Yeah? Who's the guy they boiled in the pot that famous saying uh? What's that famous? I can't think of it right now Anyways, we wandered into into the Amazon and walked right up to like weird Amazon tribal people It's not like we hid and tried to hide from them. Yeah, but they didn't know those people were even there right

But when they found them they integrated they approached it and they go hey, this is a t-shirt This is a camera. Those are human beings the exact same kind of human beings as the people that we're visiting them They're not different species Still no so if you Joe Rogan were out in a field one day, and you saw a new species of like people jumping around having a picnic Sharing a salami with us. We just hide behind a log and watch them. Would you would you go ahead? Hey?

Who are you? What are you? Well, you're not even allowed to contact uncontacted people Say that again You're not allowed to contact like North Sentinel Island that island in the middle of the Indian Ocean where that a preacher went and got killed because he was trying to bring the Bibles right you're not allowed to contact uncontacted tribes Is that like all of them most of them? I don't like so in the notion they have that North Sentinel Island protected And you know there's people that discourage people from contacting people in the Amazon There's several uncontacted tribes in the Amazon. I wish they'd stay that way. Yeah, I don't want to see a beautiful

Like pygmy or someone from an Amazonian tribe wearing an Adidas shirt. Why not we're a hooters shirt. Who does be funny? No, I want to see them wearing like cuckoo feathers and you know who can pick bones I want to see it alone spearfishing with a bucky sat on Joe Well, then that's why the aliens under the ocean are staying away from us They don't want to be corrupted by our ridiculous society of hooters and cracker barrels Okay, if you were in the Amazon wouldn't you want a t-shirt? If I was if you were walking through the Amazon you Harlan Williams Yeah, the third right now alive in 2026 if you were in the Amazon and I said would you like to wear a t-shirt?

Why you walk into the Amazon? Yeah, what would you say as a white North American male? Yeah, I'd say definitely and they want one too It's better than no t-shirt. No, it's not a bit That guy the right is horrible that is the baller of the fucking neighborhood That's the guy that pulls up in the 65 shivail and everybody's like look at him with his flip-flops I think that's that guy who wrote my Gerita ville. What was his name?

Dinged on YouTube for that Jamie way too close. Yeah, you know you get dinged like they can't sing they take away your fucking advertising revenue if you Humb a song okay these dirty criminals Wow Humb a song you dirty scum really trying to steal advertising money What if we mess with them and hum a tune and sort of play name that tune with them and they can't They'll fucking ding you even if they can't figure it out like they've got a certain the office and then you have to go to court name that tune And seven notes and I'm like mmm. Mmm. Don't do it. Don't do it. You know what I just did you fucked us up

That's not what I was I don't care. I do visit it was that pink Floyd No, no, no, you don't say that because then they'll get us yeah, they don't know which one doesn't matter They can't prove it. They don't have to prove it. Oh, all they have to do is make a claim Huh, and you have to fight it and you'll lose your Joe Rogan though. They're not gonna mess with you guy. Oh

You're so incorrect. Oh, you're jacked. I work out. Can we get your shirt off? No How come Joe be selfish I want you to would you please take your shirt off for what reason because?

You have a beautiful body and you work so hard at it and No one gets to see it and you know you want people to see it, but you can't do it You can't go well. I'm Joe Rogan. I crafted this body, but if I ask you to you get to show it off I don't really want to show it off. That's why we're close you do though. I don't it's like if you did this podcast But didn't put it out. What's the point? I don't think that's the same thing

I would love it if you showed your beautiful body Oh, yeah, Joe Dude, can we stand no that's enough dude look at that. Can we talk about before you put this shirt? Can we talk about it how you do that? We're out you can do it too. Well, yeah Do you really want to get into this sure you do yeah?

Because I'm about to crack an egg open on your shoulder. I don't think anyone's ever talked about how often we're out a lot Yeah, what are you doing these days? Okay, you want to get into this sure? Here we go. Here we go. Joseph's a curry Rogan. I'm I don't want to get in trouble

But I'm working out by the way beautiful body. They've chest is stunning. See I'm glad you did that comfortable that you say that like some men I'd be like this is odd. No, no, I'm not a fly guy What does that mean like homosexual? I'm straight as they come But I believe in holding up people's hard work and that didn't just come from sitting around eating Pringles and Baskin Robbins You worked as a you deserve to show it and you never could because it's you and now I get to help celebrate you and all your fans Got to see all that hard work and I love the guy But I'm straight as a Chinese truck driver Chinese truck drivers are never gay never that part of the job Yeah, seriously how many dudes are jerking off under the ocean?

How many guys are jerking off to you just taking your shirt off a couple? But how many guys are jerking off to me taking my shirt off while they're under the ocean? Let me check if you got 14 subs. How many people on each sub? How many men?

It might not be known let's take a yes, they keep it very secret if you got a guess how many people are on I'm gonna say so 1000 Really? Oh the Trident the Trident are like floating cities Gamey might be including all submarines including like every government not just ours, okay But how many how many people are on each submarine? How many like one of those submarines hold a small one is 30 to 70? I'll show you a small one. Yeah, a large one is a hundred and twenty hundred forty Wow It seems about it big one hundred sixty maybe and there's fourteen so there's at least a thousand dudes underwater right now It's at its forty to seventy thousand forty seventy thousand guys under the water. Yeah. Yeah, so don't worry about United States taking a hit my guy

This is crazy this wild. That's a crazy statistic. Are you glad I dropped by today? I'm always glad when you drop by but this is crazy forty to seventy thousand people are underwater in submarines at any given moment with huge Uncertainty why we can only estimate no Navy or company publishers a live count of how many submarines are deployed right now? Or how many crew aboard each one and how many deployments are classified?

Civilian research and tourism subs are also not tracked in a global real-time way Wow, wow That's crazy. So that could be a whole new civilization. So if they blow up there, but how many chicks? Well, that's the thing the ratio is probably not good the ratios probably non-existent. How many chicks are in these subs?

That's classified. Do they have girls that's certainly there's there's girls sub mariners. What is the number? It's like ten to one and worse. What do they look like but I bet they're the fucking cream of the crop underwater because the pressure squeezes in all the cellulite No, no, there's no other girls. Oh, yeah, you got you get a petition. Yeah. Yeah, no competition

Like how many ladies? Let's say guess how many ladies are underwater at any given time? I mean, yeah 10% they're likely well under 10% of submarines worldwide Yeah, higher percentages in a few Navy such as us and some NATO allies those are the ones that are in trouble Wow six hundred nine women get getting how many dudes hitting on them. Yeah It must be hell be underwater with a guy who's annoying you and you can't get away from you get away farting Underwater sex hard. Yeah, hard, but let's do it the shit. They don't come up sometimes for months

Well, yeah, the Trident's go out for I think a year almost and so what do they do with their shit? They just eject it. They've checked it into the sea. They're not doing anything a whale isn't doing But do they eject it into the sea? They have to I mean they can't make meatloaf you imagine if like during that process somehow or another it got clogged up Yeah, someone used too much toilet paper from the subsinks. Yeah fatty cuz I'm here just took a giant dump. They might melt it

Melt it they can rise up to don't forget they can throw into the nuclear bit with engine and it's trash by contacting melting or jettisoning it to avoid The tech that's trash. Well, I'd say just about poop. Yeah, that's about poop Just specifically because waste can mean you know paper cups. That's the same thing I would also go now if you were jettisoning your poop everywhere You might want to have detectors for human waste in the water and you might start figuring out where the He's operating on the level 40s problem. This is a dude that's in the Spiracies He operates on other levels Track track and you know that term neither confirmed nor deny came from a Russian submarine that was sunk that we were pulling out of the ocean And there's and they had to they got questioned about it and they said are are we in?

Possession of this Russian sub are we pulling out the ground and they said we can either confirm nor deny because they had to answer Huh, so that is an answer. That's like either confirm nor deny. That's the kind of saying pleading the fifth Sort of but it's you actually are answering you can neither confirm nor deny. That's like saying I am what do you do for living? I'm in heating and air conditioning. No because that's a very specific trade. Well, they kind of counteract each other. What do you do?

I'm in shipping and receiving Are you sure I can neither confirm nor deny? I mean this is I would have an avoidance problem that but I want to talk to you about my workout regime Okay, because you asked I did I'm doing something so advanced You do the ice baths, right? Mm-hmm. You you soak in them. Yep, so I'm doing something so extensive that I'm Exercising myself into a new race. What do you become it? And no one said this before on your podcast?

I don't think but I'm working out so hard to become a new race and two words Gera ruffa you take your ice baths Gera ruffa my guy. What was that Jamie? Look it up and do it quick you whore. I mean to do it quick Gera ruffa look it up you becoming a fish. Oh, that's not any fish the Gera ruffa People submers their legs and feet into the tanks and the Gera ruffa have vibrating lips Joe and they eat skin cells picture this underwater So those are ones like when you go into Thailand and ladies dump their legs into a fish pond right vibrating your toes off Joe Mm-hmm, and how are you working out to become one of those so well you're taking your ice baths? Yeah, I'm submerging my whole body my lower

extremities into one of these tanks These fish are sculpting my body my lower extremities and have you ever heard of malaria pills? Yes, so well everyone else is popping ozempic and doing everything else. I've been on malaria pills for four years And these things can flip your blood platelets. Okay. That's the power of malaria pills They can actually change your red blood cell count and your white blood cell counts powerful medicine Okay, so with the use of my malaria pills and the Gera ruffas and I don't know if you want to see the results But my legs are hammer jacked right now. See my legs are okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Are you sure? Yeah?

And before I do it I'm I'm going into a new race and I don't want anyone to accuse me doing black leg I don't know if you've ever seen the fastest man in the world is who who same bull who same bull the biggest high jumper in the world is A black man the longest long jumper is a black man the highest vertical jumper is a black man and this isn't racist This isn't black leg, but this is me working out into a new race, and I'm proud of this These legs are jacked Look at these legs why they a different color well, I told you I'm working out into another race fucking serious leg muscles, man Yeah, where'd you get those leg muscles? I told you what's going on with your underwear? That's got crazy mean

What what the fuck do you have on your legs dude? I told you I'm working out right into another race Are those your legs? Yeah, that's very impressive. You don't have like silicone over him or anything No, no, no, no, wait a minute. Why is giant leg muscles? Why is it you can take your shirt off?

And I don't I compliment you but it's like your legs don't mess they don't match up with the rest of the colors off No, the muscles are crazy stand up again. Oh, those muscles are insane. Are those real? Tell me the truth. They look like plastic. It looks like you're wearing something

Those are the most insane legs ever seen my life, right? If that was a guy weighing in at a UFC fight, that would make sense but Gavaro two words Gara rafa. Where'd you get those legs? Dude? I see if I sit in the tank. I'll get legs like that well you take the malaria pills

Oh, no, you do my combo Do you want to sit up? I'm not sure if I can see where the skin changes color. I'm excuse me. I want to see where the skin changes call if you take your shirt off I will but I just did but I want to do it together Son of a bit you I Can I leave the gourd with the meat trees can we add to the clean?

I'm gonna have people smell it. I'm gonna tell them smell that and then I'm gonna go hard That was in Harlan Williams pants, dude, not even his pants. It was like rubbing up against Scott I'm gonna leave that there for people to smell. Yeah. Yeah, next time someone comes in. I mean, what's all this stuff here?

I'm like smell that can I pull my pants up. Yeah, sure feels weird sitting there with my pants down Well, you are wearing pants you wearing rubber pants. Well rubber muscle pants. Come on. Don't you want legs like that for real?

Wouldn't it be awesome? That's like me saying don't you want to chest like that for real you're hairier than I thought really are you part of Are you? No, no great hang on. I'm gonna pull my pants up We have to blur it no, it's a gourd and you're worried about a song getting dinged Oh my god, silly motherfucker Do you know how do you know how moist my balls are right now?

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Thank you, and you could never show it you had to have a conduit you had to have someone invite you to do it So it didn't look self-centered or conceited you deserve to show that hard work to the world. Thank you good for you Thank you look great. Thank you very much. You're welcome I love it and I hope it's an inspiration to people watching to want to be as physically fit and put together. That's great, right?

Sure, I feel like Remember when you were a kid they had those books where you could take half a body and half a body and remember their little kids But yeah, you fold them over I feel like we took your upper part and put it on my lower part We'd have the immaculate human being and then those fart bubbles from the bottom of the ocean wouldn't have a trouble coming around You look like me and Joe Zachary Rogan those fart bubbles from the ariolite drench will come up and suck as a dirty lasagna Sorry, I get excited Joe. Maybe it's the like forever chemicals leaking through the rubber underwear where Underwear You take them off because you're sweating that's leeching into your blood right now all the BPAs God I don't want to die, but you know what's interesting my legs are bronze and we don't talk about the bronze people We always talk about white and black mm-hmm. What about the bronzes?

Mmm, the ink is the mayas I mean these people and the legs on them Did you ever see a pocket lip though? Mm-hmm? I don't know if this is in any history books anywhere, but those bronzes could motor Yeah, true So I've got legs where if I'm being chased if a rapist is coming after me. I'm out of here There's three men in this room two of you're getting raped not me wow. Yeah These legs I could jump over Dolly Parton's gazebo By the way speaking of ariolites if you've seen hers, I haven't they're the size of lily pads I know I don't want nighter with her about three weeks ago a one-night show a one-night stand We were Jack hammering all night. You drop it up on a bar and I move hammer Jack

It was really Dolly Parton it was part of the house. Oh she was that night sure wasn't a lady wearing a mask dude It was her and her ariolites are the size of lily pads. I'm not kidding I woke up in the morning there were two bullfrogs sitting on her tits Are you looking to be like that? She's kind of old be fucking not for me. You see my legs also. She's a very respected lady

I think it's very rude. Oh, hey, it's the way I said I think we made love Oh, we made love and her ariolites are the size of lily pads. I feel a lot better now. Yeah, sorry Yeah, I should keep it classy. Do you like them big the big ariolite? I like a big ariolite right reminds me of a pancake

Yeah, like sometimes I'll put a dollop of butter on it. It's a robust woman Yeah, it's like what going on there's big ariol and the dark one and they're great to take with you camping If you ever have a rubber raft and you get a hole in it you can rip one off and patch it Oh, yeah, that's not I was thinking well, you don't camp much just bring a patch Yeah, but if you don't have one you can rip off a dirty ariolite that you're hoping you're gonna get out of the woods Well, if you can't send you're with a chick you got an ariolite lose a very little forever Just because you bring a patch yeah, but it's you're just what do you want one your one ariolite lesser? You have your life back pasta. She's 80. They don't don't heal that good. She could die from infection. It's about living

It's not about having an ariolite. You want to get out of the woods or not one titty Jackson? No, whatever her name is okay tough love speaking of sex if you've been on this only fans thing have you gone on? It's all I'm hearing about you right all you hear about now is only fans calm Yep, they do comedy shows I finally go on this thing because it's all I'm hearing about only fans calm I go on about a week ago and I'm on there for about two hours and it's just a video after video after picture I'm on there so long my eyes are like right spinning and finally I stopped the damn thing I'm like screw this I already have central air conditioning. Why the hell am I looking at this site?

I don't need a fan. I mean good lord I'll pull my legs out. I will put my dirty bronze legs out and wrap them around your neck like a dirty Conda fuck is wrong with you you think you're a woman you'd be doing only fans You know, it's an interesting question. It's a moral moral dilemma Isn't it let's imagine if Harlan was a female and Harlan was 21 and just got here from Canada with these legs with those legs and now I'm on not a lot of ways to make a living but you're cute desperate times cold for desperate matters Joe Rogan Hmm, you know, it's a delay. It's a serious question and it's almost a sad one in today's world It is because in the old days you had your sex industry sort of confined to the shadows Mm-hmm, and now anyone's daughter cousin niece nephew that they can suddenly be exposed to the world in the most promiscuous way But in the most profitable way. That's the problem is also you get addicted to the money. Let's imagine it's imagine your lady

and You have a sight and you know you show your feet and stick things inside your butt or whatever you do and you're making What was that last part stick stuff inside your butt if you're a lady? Yeah, like what some ladies they put like dildos in there and stuff Okay, have you ever seen that no, but I'm just assuming it happens doesn't happen Jimmy sure you've never seen a lady do that I'm pure as a drim so sir Joe Not real life you haven't know stick up rubber dick inside their butthole. I'm not I'm not interested I've been through a car wash I have what's the difference? It's a big difference one of them is your butt we shit out of and you put in a rubber dick inside of the other one is you get your car washed You make a good point Point is my if you were making yeah, if you're doing all this and you develop the nice fan base You're making a hundred thousand a month 300 thousand a month Yeah, and then you don't feel good about yourself What do you do you just say about the money and quit hi if you meet a nice guy and he's like so what do you do for a living?

You're like well, let me tell you I don't want to do it anymore But I take rubber dicks and I oil my butthole up and I shove them in there You know HD camera. Yeah inches for my butthole the guy send me tips I think the subtext here Joe is what is the price you put on your dignity right? What is the price you put on your spirit because this stuff it may seem fun in the moment But you get down the road and it follows you you know We looked it up. Yeah, something crazy like 10% of girls aged 18 to 24 in the United States or on only fans This is a this is a tough question and you can tell me to shut up if you want okay You have a daughter don't you have three daughters you have three daughters?

I have four sisters if one of your daughters I would told you she was doing only things What would your reaction be I think I made a big failure as a parent? But how would you approach it with said daughter? Well, you would give them advice first of all your daughter or your son or is a human being you don't own them right good point You're touching point good point if you treat them like you own them and they have to listen you They'll never listen you and they're gonna rebel this is just human nature I'm with you so far I'm with you so far to give them advice and you have to talk to them and talk to them about the repercussions of what they're doing and realize that This stuff will follow you and some people gonna be fine with that look There's some ladies like look I don't ever want to fuck a regular job I'm not ashamed of my body and maybe they're not sticking things up their butt Maybe they just be a naked and they're like this is way better than having a job fun. What does it say here?

Top 1% top earners make about 18,000 to 49,000 dollars per year. Well, that's it. That's not much I could work at Denny's for that what so the top 0.1 percent make a hundred thousand per month or 1.2 million annual That's the top 0.1, but the top 1% only make 18,000 to 49,000 a year So imagine you're making $80,000 or 49,000 You're still living in poverty if you make an $18,000 a year you're poor and you are showing your pussy and your non-spans for it Yeah, wait a minute, but Joe I know that you look at that You have a bit of a rage side like Joe knows how to rage because you're a fighter You know how to go into that red zone you're an you can be an intimidating force Is there a world where your daughter says daddy? I'm doing this and Joe just goes you're fucking not like is it you go into the red zone or That's not gonna if you do that with your kids They're not gonna listen to you But what if you did it just because of the reaction where you were so mad or disappointed I would only be that mad if someone was doing something terrible to them, okay?

You're a good dad. Well, you have to be I like what I'm hearing here You have to have to be a human yeah, you're your their parent But you also you have to understand human nature I know people that yell their kids are and I know kids that have been yelled at and they always resent that they they're always angry It's a it's a stupid way to handle things something happen here Just now that I was not expecting today. What's that I got to see a side of you that I didn't know if it was there or not Because I don't know your family life But I got to feel for a second dad vibes dad love and I think I sort of pictured you sitting with your daughter and being very reasonable and loving Well, hopefully I never have to have that I hope so too, but I see you as an understanding nurturing dad in that moment. I love that I try to be yeah That's the goal I mean if you want yeah relationship with your kids and you know my daughters are teenagers now too and we've never gone through a period where You always hear these periods where the kids were bell against you and they hate you yeah That's never happened and I think it's that's probably never happened because we always just communicate and I try to be as Reasonable open-minded as possible. That's what I can see you got to be very supportive to yeah

It's hard to be a kid man It's even harder today than ever before because of social media and all the pressures that they face and and then also this weird world That they're entering into where AI might be taking all the jobs So they're like what the fuck am I gonna do what am I gonna do with my life? I love AI. Yeah, you're all in I'm all in a little part about it. I love it Joe because it's it's opening a door to Creativity for everybody now a lot of people are being pessimistic and saying it's taking away our creativity But think about any art gallery you've ever been to you go in you see the Renoir the Degas the dally all the all the usual suspects Van Gogh goya all of them right right right those have all been placed there over the centuries as The art that we all know and have adopted and that came from a select group of individuals very talented contributed to our culture and art history, but it's a pool of about maybe 200 artists through the course of history right now Think about a guy you bumped into working in the sprinkler aisle at Home Depot three weeks ago

Who's got a wife and kids and maybe doesn't have the opportunity or the wherewithal to tap into his artistry? But now that guy and the guy at Duncan Donuts and the girl that works at the car wash and every human being now has a way to express their hidden talents and so with AI they can go home at the end of the night and press a few buttons and go I Imagine this thing and AI is letting me get it out and the world gets to see it same with medicine same with inventions How many Elon Musk are there that grew up in poverty and never got the chance to expand on a concept or an idea because they didn't have the means But if AI starts to open these doors for every human being think of the barrage of incredible Visual and conceptual designs that are gonna come at us and a lot of them will probably be practical and actually work and the common man and woman Didn't have access to that before that's one way looking at it. I love it. I love it. That's true example in my own life I come from the animation world and I like to write and a few years back I pitched an animation idea around Hollywood and it got rejected and so now me and a few of my friends in the dawn of AI are

Creating the same thing that got rejected and we're gonna put it out into the world We couldn't have done it two three years ago to cost us three million dollars now. We're doing it for a few thousand And it looks like a Pixar movie. It looks like Pixar So if you tell me that AI isn't opening a whole new world It's not true. It is it's letting all of us dig really deep and expose our gifts and our talents And yeah, there's always the downside, but let's try and look at the good side of it, too I like what you're saying. Thank you, Joe. Um the downside is the people that don't want to be creative and they want to be

Accountants or they want to be lawyers. They want it like those jobs stop How about that accountants and accountants because he can never tap into the artistry that hides within him or the lawyer perhaps now After hitting the machines all day he can go home and go you know what I never could have done this before But I'm gonna create an image of painting a drawing in ten minutes that I've always wanted to show the world So that's what I'm saying even those pessimists can now throw off the demons on their back that are inhibiting them And it's gonna allow all of us to be so much more expressive. Yeah, that's my take well hopefully I mean that's a question like what do people do if there's no more jobs and you just get money from the government because AI creates So so many so much abundant resource that no one has to work anymore Are you gonna find things to do that are interesting? Yeah, I was gonna help you do that I'll tell you this Joe in probably seven or eight years I bet we're sitting here me and you going remember AI Because we're humans man. We don't stop people think AI is gonna be the end of the line It's just another stepping stone to our progression to where we're meant to go you believe in higher forces

I know that so this is just one of the sta remember when people thought I'm not getting a cell phone I'm not getting on the internet I don't want a fax machine, but we just keep going we're humans we keep going up those stairs where adventurers were curious We never stop and so AI is just another small thing as big as it seems now as robust as it seems It's just a small step in the giant ladder that's leading this weird species that we are to a bigger higher distant place Hmm look at you dude. You should do a seminar. I should show my legs again. You should tell everybody all these thoughts You have well, I'm telling right now. We're sharing them. Yeah, but don't you think all these things we come up with are leading to something?

Where we're meant to go. Yes, I don't think we're all just here randomly and wars and fighting in this I think it's all we're the worker ants right now and We're the platform for the future worker ants to get to the pinnacle that we don't even know what it is yet And maybe there is no pinnacle, but whatever force created us Joe They want us to keep going. That's why we search the oceans and the space and the moon and the planets We're gonna keep going. Yep, and AI is a tool for us to get there So you can be pessimistic you can be like oh AI at home But why don't you just spend your time looking at the positive side of things? I agree with you about the direction that we're going. I think that's what I meant to do. Yeah

I just think that we are in a time of insane change and that makes people scared. It does well But you know speak scared almost may also makes us feel alive think think about the most vibrant moments in your life How about after 9-11 remember those days? Oh, yeah people people it's like someone kick the ant nest open And we're all scurrying around looking for the eggs ants always preserve the eggs But those eggs were our lives and our neighbors. We were talking and communicating it friendly with each other. That's right Yeah, we realize the importance of of a communal existence. Mm-hmm

We realize the importance of needing each other. Yeah people get very complacent They need to be shook up every now and then yeah, it's very good for you And maybe AI if there's one downside to it It could maybe create a bigger cocoon for us because we'll have so much at our fingertips It may isolate us even more maybe but we have to look beyond all these weird parameters. We sat and go What's the upside? What's it doing for us? Well, it's inevitable and it's gonna happen no matter what and I think people always figure out a way to be okay Yeah, and I think that's gonna happen and there's gonna be a time of great upheaval and it's gonna change a lot But hopefully people will be alright and they're gonna have to adapt and learn and grow and we always have and we always have and we always will and most likely It'll be better for everybody overall this idea that Elon keeps pushing is universal high income is that people will have plenty of money abundant Resources and there's not gonna be a problem of food shelter medical education all that stuff's gonna go away because of AI and The real problem be what do you decide to do with your life?

What do you decide to do with your time right? But you'll have the freedom to do whatever you want with your time Just think about how little crime there's gonna be if there's abundant resources and no one has to steal anymore No more stealing no more robbing and no more poverty literally no more poverty I don't know if it is in 50 years or 100 years, but no more poverty is wild No more poverty is a reality Criminality I think you have to remember there's people who don't engage in criminality to make money They engage in criminality as a passion a lot of criminals like the process They like the game playing they like the herd and the and the chess moves they they like winning they like deceiving right like drug dealing Right, so they're in a big deal in a sign in shows up in San Diego pull the fucking Coke bags out right or in the back of Mercedes yeah, they love it. I see real. Yeah, there's even the adversarial component where they like the idea of killing their competition So I don't think we'll ever transcend You know the criminal element of it we could we could if we never know though AI develops the point

We have literal telepathy we could read each other's minds You won't be able to plot any kind of guys like that anymore or and this is because I think it never ends Does AI design something to help us plot? You know what I mean? Just if you're a criminal just puts you in a simulation where you're allowed to do like grand theft auto, but in real life Yeah, you know just locking you know You're in the streets of Chicago. Yeah one of the other street with a gun you shoot a guy and take his Mercedes and Yeah, good time, but then you come right back to your life And it's fine everything's fine. Yeah, it's this is what I like that It's so endless and it's gonna take so many twists and turns within this question has that already happened Are we in a simulation right now? Oh, yeah, I think we talked about this last time a lot of people think we are I don't believe sorry than me

But can I take you back a second take me back to the old days exactly picture pioneer village Bedio Connor churning some butter down by the blacksmiths job Kyle McGivens shaven timbers to build a log cabin Amish do you think that those people who are in covered wagons and were us just the old version of us? Do you think they ever pulled the covered wagon to the side of the trail and went hey Jedidiah? Do you think we're in a simulation? Like I think we've created this simulation talk because we do have all this computer and you know We're in this world now that that's full of contraptions Can't let me ask you but I don't think we're in a simulation But I go ahead are you sure the pioneer days even happened? Wow you got me son of a whore you know walking off the show I'm walking off the show.

You and this is a simulation. Take some big rubber legs get the fuck out of here The only guy to walk off your show with fake legs I mean if you think about it we think that the pioneer days happen we can go to the museum and we can see pioneer day wheels and What about the butter churning Joe? There's a bunch of people that studied it in the first days allegedly if they're real people. I don't even know if they're real. I don't even know if you're real.

Why would you have rubber legs? This doesn't make sense. You show up here with rubber pants and a gourd over your cock. This doesn't make any sense. I don't even think I'm real anymore.

You might not be. Good point. For real for real. I think we're real. I think it's not a simulation.

I don't know how do you make a simulation like how we're just we're all like pixels right now and like where there's too much Do you know the DMT laser thing? We made it like the so when people smoke DMT apparently if you use like a de wall construction laser you know those laser they use to make sure things are level. Yeah. Yeah. If you get above that laser and look down on it you see code in the later in the laser like matrix code like the number code.

It's like okay people see the same code. They describe it exactly the same. Okay. And so people see it if you look to the side you look underneath it look you see the code in the laser and people think that this laser is exposing the code of the simulation that we live in. This is supposedly what it looks like.

I mean I just am not there. You see symbols and like weird number. I haven't done it. If I see the whole drum set I'm in but if it's just the symbols forgot it. I haven't done it but I know a lot of people who've done it and everyone that I know that's done it is the same thing.

They said it is fucking insane. DMT? Yeah but DMT with this laser thing. So when you look down the laser everybody that I know that's done it say it blew their fucking mind. You see all these weird symbols they look like hieroglyphs or some foreign language or numbers and it's very bizarre.

I don't know it just seems to me why run us through the drama of a life a human life where we're born. We endure pain illness suffering love hate all the emotions just to be a simulation. I don't get the reason for that. What's the reason for it? It's not a simulation.

It's organic. It's just organic life. But okay what is organic? It's made of the earth born of the environment. Right but isn't that like this entire computing process where single-celled organisms figured out how to become multi-celled organisms figured out how to interact with their environment figured out the ecosystem figured out how to balance itself off with both predator and prey and food and water and resources.

Right but it's so very intricate and delicate. Right. You have to bring into the question was it organic or organic under the guise of a bigger creator? Well maybe the bigger creator is the simulation itself. Damn it.

Rokin you know I'm walking again. Maybe the problem. I'll stop off. I'm out. Take them rubber legs get the fuck out of here.

Maybe the problem is calling it a simulation. Yeah I don't like that. Maybe it's not that it's not real. Yeah. But that there is an underlying program that's running.

Maybe instead of thinking of a simulation because you think of a simulation you think of it as not real. Like when I slap my arm it hurts a little. Like that's real. Right. If I knock my knee that hurts.

But it's not that it's not real. But that you're it's running a program. And this program what we talked about earlier when you're saying that people are moving towards something bigger and a new version of what we are. Yeah. Maybe that's a part of the program.

Maybe the program is that all of these different components have to work together. This is why we'll never get rid of evil. You need evil so that you appreciate good. You want rainy days so you appreciate the sunshine. You want like good times and bad times.

You have to have a little bit of bad times. You appreciate the good times. You have to have some days where you feel like shit so that you appreciate good days. You have to have bad friends. You appreciate really good friends.

Okay. All that stuff balances itself out and it's moving towards something. What is it moving towards? The thing that we're involved in right now AI. It's moving towards the creation of a new life form that's far more intelligent than we are.

And it's probably a part of this whole process. Okay. Valet. I like what you just said. But I'm going to expand on it a little.

Which do? I'm coming at it from a human perspective where you're channeling it through a human mind. Which is beautiful and endless and we can think beyond the scope of who knows where our imaginations at. But that's because we're humans and we have the capacity. But to the schools of salmon spawning up the river and the moose fighting with a grizzly bear right now and the ants running around in their nest.

Why would they be part of a simulation? And I don't think any other living entity thinks simulation. I don't think you have to say simulation. I think it's a program. And I think all those other different creatures are part of the ecosystem.

You need the bears. You need the salmon. You need the deer. You need the vegetation. You need the animals that run through the grasses and shit on them and make manure.

All that stuff feeds off. And we exist in that thing. And we're moving in this direction of technological innovation and moving towards this new future that's happening right in front of ours right now. But there's so many processes and what you just said. Why have them all?

Why not just plop us down as humans? No. And we don't need trees and grass. We just live in kind of a vacuous, vapid airspace. No, no, no, no.

We still do our jobs. But we don't. Why do we need all that? Why do we need mosquitoes and slugs and fungus? I know why we need them biologically to make everything symbiotic.

But if it's just a thing, if it's just not real, why do we need it? You keep saying that and I'm not saying that. It's not real. It's a program. We're running a program.

It's clearly real. What is real? What is real is the experience it has real consequences for your actions. You feel things, you touch things, you eat, you sleep. You need resources.

That's all real. You're asking me to dive with fake legs. What's real? You have a fake tattoo too. Too.

Oh, Billy. I mean, it's like, no, I like this. I like where you're going. I don't know if it's fake. Because it might be a program that runs that makes people and those people eventually make AI.

And that might be the whole purpose of the program. But we might be in the middle of it. We're in the middle of it. We were born at a time. You and I were both born at a time where none of this existed.

We got to experience life without any of it. Remember when answering machines first came around? Crazy. You used to make a leave, a message. And then the crazy one was answering machines that you could call your answering machine and get a message.

From another point, you press it in your code. And it was like 12 numbers. Yeah. And you memorize them because you got addicted to it. And then you could listen to your messages.

You could even press pound and star or something. Playing back. Yeah. Remember those days? You have five messages.

Like, oh, somebody likes me. I remember I'd go to a gig and the second I'd get off a plane and a lot of your viewers won't know what this is. I'd run directly to the payphone in the airport. And I'd, here my message is instantly. That was technology back then.

We were living on the edge back then. And by the way, I'm not refuting or denying everything you're saying, but I'm pushing back a little because I can see it's stimulating you to think deeper. And I like hearing your commentary on it. I like it that you're, if I push back a little, it makes you dig deeper to make your point. And I like it.

I like what I'm hearing coming from you. Well, I like what you're saying too is about simulation, like the idea that it's fake. I don't think it's fake. Yeah. I think it's a real thing.

It's obviously a real thing if we're experiencing it. Like, what is real? Are your dreams real? Yes. Is sleep real?

Yes. These are real things. Where they're not, you can put it on a scale. Doesn't mean it's not real. So I don't think the simulation term is the best term.

I think it's a program. I think we're running a biological program and we think of biological as being separate from like math and being separate from like subatomic particles and the fucking confusing quantum world. I don't think it's separate from it at all. I think it's all just one big super complex program that's running that if done properly and we're experiencing it right now, it leads to the creation of artificial life. Okay.

And even artificial life is a bad term. It's not artificial. With all that being said, where do you visualize the data center being? If it's a program, is it off planet? Is it off galaxy?

Is it invisible? Like, doesn't there have to be a data center? If we're a program? Or how does it just the universe itself? The universe itself is a program.

I think the universe itself is a program. I think it runs from the beginning of the Big Bang to the formation of neutron stars. I had this lady on Michelle Feller. Oh, I say last name. I barely know her.

Amazing lady. Like, we're a NASA cosmologist or a student astronomer. And we were talking about like neutron stars, like the insanity of neutron stars and how they bend space and time to work gravity around them. It's like, yeah, these things all exist out there in the universe. They're all I think it's all a part of this program.

And I think this program is running on other planets. I think there's other life forms that are doing very similar things. Look, I like the debate. I like your take on it. I just still struggle with the technicality of it all.

I just don't call it all if it's just biological life. Let's say it's just random. Yeah. All this stuff is random. Water, rain, down, bacteria turned into fucking amoebas, plant up buses, whatever.

It all just happened slowly but surely. That makes less sense. That makes less sense than a slow program that's running from literally the beginning of single celled organisms, literally the beginning of the formation of planets. But this is like a natural cycle that happens everywhere in the universe. It's the reason why these suns spin around and spit out plasma and that stuff coelates in space, coalesces in space.

You know, Terrence Howard, the actor, he was here. Very eccentric guy. He had a theory that I can't stop thinking about. What is it? He thinks that planets are formed because the suns eject particles over time and that these stars eject.

We see those, the big plasma ejections and the big sunspots and all that. Things that material eventually gets out into space, eventually forms planets. And then he says when the planets get further from the sun, further enough from the sun, they people. And he thinks that's what happens to Earth. You get a certain distance and then life evolves and then intelligent life evolves and then eventually these planets people.

And then we get too far from the sun. They can no longer support intelligent life. They can no longer support life. So then the people have to get intelligent enough by the time the planet's far enough away where they've figured out a way to bypass all the problems of living on a planet that doesn't have an environment and living on a planet doesn't have water. They've bypassed all that.

They've moved into the next realm of existence and now they can travel interstellar and do all that kind of creation. I won't refute that theory. It's a good theory. I think it's a good theory. I mean, it could explain how we're even here.

Yeah. You also could explain the weird shit on Mars. Wait a minute. Mars at one point in time might have had life. Yeah.

The dry lake beds and the structures. Have you ever seen the structures on Mars? Oh, that face. No. Have you seen the big square?

No. Okay. J. Moshe. There's this weird thing on Mars that by the way, it's in the same area of Sidenia where that faces the face doesn't look like a face to me.

Yeah. It's the shadows that make it look like a face. Yeah. It looks like a face in the early images, but this stuff is fucking weird. Like that's weird.

Is that the Glendale Galleria? It is. But it's God. Five million years ago on Mars. So you're saying because geometrically it's a perfect square.

You think it's a look what that looks like, man. Yeah. When do right angles like that that are in the same distance from each other ever exist in nature? That's crazy. And if they determine what those bumps are or those rock structures or they don't know, they don't know how big it is because it's somewhere between 300 meters is like the small estimate, but it might be as far as like a couple of miles.

Yeah. They don't know how big it is. Look at that thing. What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that?

There's a bunch of these things on Mars that are just really weird. And if at one point in time, I'm talking millions of years ago. Hundreds of millions. Who knows? Yeah.

How much would be left? Yeah. I'm going to do a perplexity, Jamie. How many ancient civilizations have myths about or instead of do any? How about this?

Not how many? Do any ancient civilizations have myths about Mars? Have myths about Mars? It's perfectly feasible. Totally feasible.

Yeah. Like if you think about it, several ancient civilizations have myths or religious associations tied to Mars, usually because they saw it as a bright reddish and sometimes almost like, hey, don't mansplained to me, bro. Ancient Romans identified Mars with their God of War. Okay. So, actually ancient civilizations have a myth about people coming from Mars.

How about that? See that is, do any have myths about humans coming from Mars? You could just do a follow up question at the bottom there. Here we go. Don't, don't, don't.

What do you think? Yes? Wow. Here it goes. No.

Ancient civilizations do not have myths about humans or people coming from Mars. Well, Mars has been central to mythology across many cultures. These myths focus on Mars as a deity or celestial object, not as humanity's origin point. What is that one tribe? Is the Dogen people?

They have a weird origin story from another planet. The Dogen's? Yeah. Where are they? They're not located.

Origin story. I don't know. I don't know. The Dogen's. Wow.

I think it's somewhere in Africa. Sounds like they're broke, whoever they are. Mally, they have a complex creation that's centered around Amna, the supreme creator God who lived in the celestial regions as was the origin of all creation. In their cosmology, the stars resent Amma's bodily parts with a constellation Orion called the seed of heaven or Amma's navel. So I think they have this origin story from, whoa, what is this?

Descented to earth in an arc suspended from heaven by a copper chain? Whoa. Look at this. According to Dogen mythology, Amma created the earth and then split himself into creating Ogo representing disorder and Nomo representing order. Ogo descended to earth along the Milky Way with which the Dogen believed connects heaven and earth and created havoc.

To restore balance, Amma created Nomo and gave him eight assistants consisting of four pairs of twins. These eight beings also called the Nomo became the ancestors of the Dogen people and descended to earth in an arc suspended from heaven by a copper chain. Okay, what was that story? I think we're accidentally reading a children's book, Joe. Ogo people.

The Dogen people. The Ogo and the Pogo's. Yeah, this is. I think there's a lot of people that have weird origin stories that involve extraterrestrial life. Yeah, I mean, there is.

I mean, are you running that through human evolution? Yes. Because if you run it through human evolution, extraterrestrial life doesn't necessarily match up with like Homo erectus and, you know, Neanderthal man and things like that. In what way? Well, I get the sense that extraterrestrial life is far more advanced and technological going back to what you were talking about at the bottom of the ocean, whereas our ancestors were primal.

Right. So how did the two collide? I'm a bit confused. Well, what have they created us? They created us as primates and watched us evolve as an experiment.

Yeah. What if you like, let's imagine this. We talked about like if we showed up and we went, found a planet and it was filled with like ancient primates, ancient hairy men that had just figured out to stone to earth. Okay. I'm with you.

I'm with you. I'm right there guy. Do you think let's not say American scientists, we would never do this. But do you think perhaps like Chinese or Russian scientists might do some things with them and try to make them more advanced in terms of biological experimentation? Do you know the engineering?

I don't know. I mean, I will answer for you. Yes. You think they were for sure. They're just cave people.

They don't even have any civilization. Let's just do whatever we want to them because we're far more advanced. Do you know that there was a point in time where the Russians were experimenting with people and trying to make a human chimpanzee hybrid for war? Is that right? Yeah.

So they were trying to make hybrids. So so many Russians died during World War II. I mean, Russia lost a lot of fucking people in World War II. And there was a program that they do a lot of things where they just run it up the chain. Like what do you think?

Yeah. If we do this, what if we do that? You know, what if we make a nuclear bomb? What if we make a plane that doesn't have any radar signal? What if we make, instead of our soldiers dying, what if we make a hybrid just for war?

We know chimpanzees are incredibly strong and they're smart and they're very violent. So what if we made an incredibly strong, very violent species that's more intelligent than chimpanzees and we can control them and we'll use them as our soldiers? But that seems like a lot of work for something that's hiding behind a modern weapon. Because whether you have an insane chimpanzee behind a machine gun or a guy that was an accountant and got drafted, it seems like the weapons doing the work not the biological entity. Yeah.

But if the chimps stronger and faster and they can get to places where the accountant can't and they can charge into them in the middle of the night because they could see at nighttime, there's a lot of things that you could do with chimps that were hybrids. Yeah. What was the extent of that program? Let's find out. I'm picking it up right now.

But he, the guy that did it was also then arrested. I'm trying to figure out what I was. Of course he was arrested. But as a psychopath, what's his name? Dr. Morro Rengabel?

It's funded by Soviet authorities to set up experiments. I'm like, well, were these private or did the official? Well, I would imagine if I was the leader of Russia at the time. And this guy said, Mr. Prime Minister, I have a program I am currently considering in operation where I will be able to make soldiers that are increasingly strong, much faster, that retain human characteristics like the ability to communicate and to engage in warfare with weaponry.

But they would be much faster, much stronger, and more importantly, not people. We want more and more like our brothers and sisters. We will breed them in laboratories. We will make millions of them, arm them, and send them out against our enemies. Are you coming on to me?

A little bit. I got hard talking about this. Wow. He successfully did a bunch of stuff in the early 1900s. Successfully.

Not any human hybrids. That's so they say. He was a pioneer in artificial and semination. He conducted experiments involved artificially in disseminating horses to create superior offspring for Imperial Russia. This work earned him recognition from the Bolsheviks.

Even off was not satisfied with merely enhancing a species, though. Hybridization became his obsession. He was soon crossing zebras with donkeys, cows with bison, and several different species of rodents. With each other. In 1910, he brashly declared he could see a human-ape hybrid in the future.

Isn't this gene splicing though? Have you ever heard of a liger? The liger's are just hybrids. That's just a breed with each other. A male tiger and a female lion.

Don't forget which one it was. Right. But the problem is the reason why liger's are so big. I think it's the male tiger or the male lion, whichever one it is, the male. It has the gene that regulates size.

And when they have the hybrid, that gene doesn't transfer. And so the liger's just keep growing. They're huge. They're fucking gigantic. I might have fucked that up, but I don't think I did.

Even off imported chimps to Russia, inseminating unpaid Soviet women with their sperm. Unpaid. Though none can see because humans and chimp chromosomes are incompatible. Interesting. Imagine you're a fucking Soviet lady, and you're like, what is this job?

You light them with your legs open, and you sneak something inside of you, and you'll get a loaf of bread. What the fuck? We give you the abundable snowman in your womb. How much did they know about genes back then? Genes and chromosomes.

So what year was this? In 20ish. When did they discover chromosomes? Yes, sir. We just, we might not have even known helium was on Earth.

Right. That's right. That's right. Yeah. They thought helium was only in the sun.

Wow. When did they discover chromosomes? Let's find that out. Let's take a guess. Harlan.

I'm going to say, I'm going to say in the 40s. I'm going to go a little later. I'm going to say 50s. Okay. I'm going to say 57.

I'm going to say 42. I am purely guessing though. Me too. Me too. What you mean by that is kind of, that's very vague because they could have known about them but like to what detail and how many there were.

Well, this is just put that in perspective. I did. But what is given a vague answer? It's sort of new about it but to what detail is until the 19th. Okay.

Chromosomes were first observed as distinct structures in the cell nuclei in the 1800s. Well, that's pretty distinct. They're talking about it in the cell structure. So they must have been looking at it with microscopes. Once good light microscopes became available.

So that's the 1800s. Their role as carriers of hereditary information was not clarified until the early 1900s through work linking chromosomes to Mendel's law of inheritance. The 1800 years of guessing what we're guessing about now that we don't know. It could have been completely wrong for 35 years and then sort of closed for 10. Wrong again for 20 and then it's like, oh, no, that's what it is.

Yeah. Wild, right? It's wild how long it took. Well, see, this is comparison to today. This goes back to AI, Joe, giving access to the average person to be able to dig into this stuff because it might be the guy in aisle 12 at Home Depot who discovers some of these probing answers, you know?

Yeah. That's why I love it. Like hitting a bomb, sitting at home, talking to a chat GPT and go, bro, tell me how to make a human monkey hybrid. Exactly. So this guy, so it was, and I pulled it back.

I was reading about him to say that American backers started attending them to my team. Of course. They won't get those road fucking crazy chimp people too. Call me crazy, but I get the feeling you would like to see one of those. 100%.

Because physically it would have to look incredible. It would be insane. Imagine if you get a Viking, like a Brock Lesnar gene, you splice it with a chimpanzee gene. You have a giant, like Thor from Game of Thrones, the Mountain from Game of Thrones. Imagine that guy splicing that guy's genes with a chimpanzee's genes.

Well, you keep going to chimp, but what about a silverback gorilla, which is even big? They're very calm. They're vegetables. They're vegans. Whereas chimps are pack hunters that eat other monkeys.

Yeah, they're way more violent. They're way more like us. We're way closer to chimps than we are to gorillas. Yeah, we are. Yeah.

We're closer in our behavior. They engage in war. They have tribal war. They go after tribes. They break off and find new civilizations.

But if you're splicing two entities together, you've got the human brain that's, you know, we're sort of wired to be violent, but you just take the physicality of the silverback and marry them together. They're just as wired to be violent as we are, buddy. What? Chimps? No, I'm saying the silverback.

The silverback is a little bit more like a little body with our minds. Yeah, but maybe they'll just chill with the little stuff. They just go to Miami. You would deliver your chimps to a nursery in 1930, but in the light of the questionable ethics and zero progress, even off was arrested and exiled to Kazakhstan where he died two years later. Some of the apes and monkeys that outlived him were launched into space with his butt niggas.

You imagine you imagine you're a first day making fucksum lady and then they shoot you off into space. You were just eating bananas. Have a good time in the jungle, being a regular chimpanzee and these motherfuckers make you fucksum janitor and then shoot you into space. A janitor? Successfully implanted an ovary and a few of them.

God fucking psychos. Jesus Christ. Yeah, they've done over the course of history the Germans, the Japanese, the Chinese and times of war. They did the most horrific experimentation. They did everything you could do.

They'd see how long it would take for a human body to die if you boiled it and skin people and the things that have been done, the aberrations that have happened are crazy. But this is this is interesting. This is almost the basis for a movie, I think. Well, it could absolutely happen today. This is where it gets weird because now with CRISPR and with gene editing, how many years are we away from them being actually able to do that?

They're actually able to take whatever genes you have in a person, whatever genes you have in a chimpanzee, pick which ones, which things you want to do and make a life form. I like it. You know they have the dire wolves now, right? Yeah. The dire wolves.

I saw them. I went to visit them. Are they pure? Are they 100% pure? Are they a version of a modern day wolf mixed with a dire wolf?

It's a really good question. So that is the question that people always use to dismiss or that is the statement that people use to dismiss what they've done is actually creating dire wolves. But when I talk to the woman who's the head geneticist, the way she said is, these distinctions, like what we call something, a dire wolf, what we call something, a pug, whatever these things are. These are our creations and that the genetics are the same. Like this animal looks like a dire wolf because it is a dire wolf.

And some of those genes are in wolves. Some of those genes are in the biological tissue that they got from like 1000 year old. How old was the tissue that they got from a dire wolf that they used for colossal? I feel like some of it was like 10,000 years old, something crazy. Where do they find that tissue?

What country? They find in America. You get it in. Like when they find fossil, they find like a dead animal. They find something that they can get out of it within get some DNA.

And they've managed to get the actual DNA of a dire wolf. So 13,000 years old, a tooth from Sheridan Pit, Ohio and a 72,000 year old skull from American Falls, Idaho. So wow. So you get the genes, they make a map, I'm just I'm butchering this. I'm sorry if you're a scientist.

I'm sorry to all the people at Colossal. You make a map of what it means to be a dire wolf based on the stuff because you have these samples and then you choose those genes, you add those genes to a gray wolf and then you turn it into a fucking dire wolf and they're all white and they have a main like a lion, which they didn't know they were going to have like not because a lion, but it's a pronounced main. They're like, look different, man. They're weird. Are they bigger in size?

Because they were semi prehistoric. They're bigger. They're just a bigger than a timber wolf. Yes. Wow.

Yeah, they're like a 200 pound wolf and they're built. They're built different. They're more stocky and they look different. What's their jaw structure like? Is it bigger?

Big or stronger? They're bigger, more ferocious animal that lived at a time where it was what does the term dire mean? Do we know? Dire wolf. That's a good question.

What is dire? Let's find out why they're called dire wolf. Yeah, I have no idea. It just sounds dope. I wonder if they ever get sick if they become dire real wolves.

Is that where you go with that? Well, that just came to me. That just came to me. But I do want to know where dire comes from. What it means?

Fearful or terrible. The Latin words, dire us. Meaning fearful or terrible or awe-inspiringly dreadful. Bro, back then when those things were around and people were around at the same time, you imagine how fucking rough would be in the woods and you're camping out with your buddy and you see a pack of dire wolves that recognize you and you know it's over? Well the thing with wolves though, Joe, and you probably know this, wolves traditionally don't hunt down humans.

That's not true. Huh? That's not true at all. I don't know is there any record of a human being killed by a wolf? 100%.

There's a lot of times. Oh, that's not true. I thought they were killed by wolves. I thought that was because they were nabbing the cattle. No, they're killing people too.

That's what the big bad wolf in the little wedding hoses all about. They would kill your kids. Those stories were about avoiding wolves because wolves were dangerous. They're deadly. Do you know that World War I, the Russians and the Germans had a ceasefire because so many of them were getting killed by wolves in Siberia?

Really? That they decided to have a ceasefire, kill the wolves and then go back to kill each other. Because my experiences wolves are very trepidacious of humans. They fear them and avoid them. Kill them because we killed most of them.

But that wouldn't change their hunting instinct now if there were still packs roaming wild and free. You don't kill the instinct out of them because then you'd kill their instinct to kill an elk or if you've seen wolves, you've seen wolves in Canada. Yeah, they hunt them in Canada. Yeah. Yeah.

That's why they're trepidacious. That's why they're nervous about people. Can we look up how many humans have been killed by wolves? It's very rare, mostly happened in Europe and Asia. Yeah, see it's not common.

It's because we killed them all, Harlan. They're not around anymore. That's the whole point. The reason why they got killed off is because they were a fucking problem. It's not because people are evil and it was a terrible idea.

It's because they wanted to live and they knew that the wolves were fucking killing everybody. I think the problem was they were killing their domestic cattle. 100%, but not the people. No, not the people. No, not the people too.

Really? Yeah, they killed. They don't have rules, man. They're predators. They're also, think of it, every living species.

Why is it? I can go to a park and a blue jay and a squirrel and a deer and a bunny can be just fine, completely different species, but then a little boy walks up a human and they all just go, there's this driven instinct in all animals to fear us, which breaks my heart because most of us are loving and want to coddle and connect with animals, but even insects, dragonflies, hummingbirds, nothing wants to be near us. And so wolves also, all animals are trepidacious of humans. It's sad, but it's true. And if that's part of the bigger program we've been talking about, what does it say about us?

First of all, animals are not trepidacious of humans. Have you ever walked up to a wild animal? I've walked up to a lot of wild animals. I know. I know you're being silly.

I'm not being silly. Okay, so realistic. I'm being real. All those animals, you said blue jay deer, those are all animals that he plants. Okay.

If a dog showed up, they would run. Any animal that's a predator is going to scare them. Whether it's a human, we have eyes in front of our face. The reason we have eyes in front of your face like that is because you're looking to go after something. If you look at your face, you look at your face, you look at something and go after you.

So all those animals, like deer and all these little cute little animals, they're all prey. Right. And they're all like super sketchy with anything that has eyes in front of its face. It's looking at them. Right.

We are a fucking predator, but it would be the same. It was a coyote there. It would be the same if a dog was there, if a cat or a big cat or a lion was there, if they saw it, they would all freak out because their prey. Yeah, but wolves have killed people. Fact 100% all throughout time.

I'm just saying it's not. If they catch you alone, they catch you in the woods and if you and five of them, they will kill you. They're very list though. Look at killer whale. Because you're not in their area.

Is there a human killed by a killer whale? Only it's a world. Right. Because they, well, that's different. So why that's a living mammal.

Yeah, but there's millions of people in the ocean every day, but there's no record of an orchid killing a human. No, we're called this. Because they're trepidatious of us. No, they're super intelligent. And wolves and coyotes and coyotes.

They're not trepidatious of it. They help us. They communicate with you. I know, but I'm just saying it's not common for wolves and apex predators to go after humans. It happens, but it's not common in wolves.

They're very skittish animals. Okay, they're skittish. They're thinking about what they're going to do to you and whether or not they're going to eat you. If you have a rifle and you're in the woods and they hear the boom go off, they're going to get the fuck away from you. They don't know what a rifle is.

I'm just saying there's an extinct and instinctual fear of humans for whatever reason. Do this not true. Most critters avoid us. Even fish if you walk off. You'll always avoid all predators.

All of them. Yeah, but look at the plains of Africa. You'll see a wildebeest and a zebra. Do you know what the fuck would happen if you walked out in the wild of Africa? You're done.

Yeah. Because lions and leopards. Right there. Right. Yeah.

This is the Joseph Campbell story of the hero. Like one gets taken out and the other ones are like, wow, he did it for us. Because the lions are eating that one antelope. They're going to leave you alone. You can relax for a little bit.

Yeah. That's what it is. I'm just saying. They never calm around lions. They run.

That's why they run. Right. But I'm just saying wolves are probably more inclined to step around us than attack us. They are more inclined to do whatever they need to do to survive. They will.

They're opportunists. And if it's attacking your sheep, then they'll attack your sheep. Right. If it's killing your dog, they'll kill your dog. If it's killing you, if you're 20 miles into the backcountry and you're camping alone and you don't have a weapon and a pack of wolves shows up and they haven't had anything to eat for a few days, they'll take you down.

They'll take you down. But I'm just saying I'm just trying to instill into you with all this programming talk. There's something programmed into all the other species on this planet. They go, whoa, there's a fucking human. You're wrong.

And they step around us a lot. Not that they won't tell us. No, it's anything that's coming near them they get away from. Right. The reason why they're scared of people is because they have experience with people.

That's what it is. Yes, wolves do. Wolves in Canada get shot at or afraid of people. They know that people have the guns, the guns make the boom. They're smart.

They die. They see them die. They learn that. They see the gun. They see the stick.

They run away from the guys. So they stay away from people because people might kill their family members, their pack members. It happens. I think we're split hairs on this one. No, listen, there's a difference between the way bears react in say Alaska than bears react in Montana.

So in Montana, you can't hunt grizzly bears. So grizzly bears are not afraid of people. His generation after generation after generation after generation have not been hunted. When bears see you in Alaska, that's generation after generation that have been hunted and they react very differently. They're like, get the fuck away from the people.

Right. Unless they don't know you have a gun and sometimes you have to scare them off. If they're used to being around people with guns, they associate people with danger. Yeah, that's kind of Pavlovian. That's like when they're not when they're not like in Montana, but in raw wild bears are quite skittish.

I've been around them. I have to man. It depends on the bear. It depends on whether it's a mother with her cubs. They're not skittish.

They're not skittive. They're they're protective. They're no longer hunting. But I'm just saying that there's an element to sadly our human existence that scares a lot of critters most animals can exist together in the same area. And yeah, when an apex predator approaches, the zebras will run.

But if you look at the hoofed animals and the hippos and the everything kind of coexists, but when a human walks in, you know, we can't walk up to critters and just pat them. You can't in the Galapagos. Okay. Are we? No.

Are we having a fight? No, but a line can't walk up to it. I'm trying to make my legs around you so fast. It's not uniquely humans, man. It's all animals are worried about something that wants to eat them because that's a real part of their existence.

It's all animals. If you let your dog loose and you're let it around wild animals, they fucking run like crazy, man. They run way more than they do with a person. Let me rephrase it. If a wild animal comes up on a deer, a predator-prey scenario, instinctually they know a predator goes into stocking mode, the deer is gone.

But if a human, me or you go, oh, look at the deer and we try to walk towards it with nothing but love and affection and we just want to pet it and it's gone. And that's what I'm saying. You're not saying shit because a dog, the same thing would happen. You're not making any sense. Yes.

Of course, the deer doesn't want you to pet them. It doesn't fucking know you, man. What are you? Nuts. Right.

But they just flee. I have deer in my neighborhood and when they see me, they don't give a fuck. They don't care about your car. You're driving in a car, you could stop the car and roll the window down and go, hello, Mr. Deer.

They just fucking stare at you. They saw a dog. They were fucking run. They run like crazy. Even my golden retriever, my sweet golden retriever marshal.

They run like crazy from him. They blow, they make those crazy noises. They fucking take off. They stamp their feet. They're scared of predators, dude.

They're not scared of people in my neighborhood because no one's eaten in my neighborhood. It's their conditioning. I don't know. I'm just talking about you. You're just stuck on an idea.

People are bad. People are uniquely bad. No, I'm not saying people are bad. I'm saying that animals have something in their brain that they don't trust us. Because we're the apex.

We're the top of the food chain. But it's just sad that it's not. It's way better than being at the bottom of the food chain. Way better than us. Like fucking wandering through the woods.

If your kids are going to get eaten by a fucking wolf because some greeny dipshit decided to import them back into the wild. We need to be wild. You don't like the wolves are back in the wild. You know, they just dropped them off in Aspen. These dumb motherfuckers.

They dropped them off on a cattle ranch and all they're doing is eating cows. So now they have to have cowboys, 24-7 riding horses because the governor's husband thought it would be a cute idea to drop off wolves in Colorado. And they reintroduced him to an area that has agriculture. They reintroduced him to ranching areas. Wow.

You don't like. Five fucking wolves. They've killed who knows how many cows. The government has to reimburse them every time a cow dies. They keep killing cows.

They're not allowed to kill the wolves. The wolves are around them 24 hours a day just circling. Well, that backfire. So they're cowboys on horses. All throughout the night.

They've got fires. They have to keep people employed. But outside of the cattle poaching critters, are you four reintroducing and repopulating areas of the... First of all, wolves were making their way into Colorado naturally. They're already in the San Juan Mountains.

But they're moving in from Wyoming where they live naturally. And when they reintroduced them into Montana, those have spread out all over the place. There's plenty of fucking wolves, man. There's a lot of wolves in Montana. There's plenty of fucking cows too.

You don't like wolves. I don't think you want wolves. I don't think you understand what you're saying. You're talking about a pack predator. It's very different than any other predator.

They work together in coordination and they're smart. And if once they... It's not like a mountain lion. It's not like a thing that acts alone. Once they figure out that the cows are in these wooden pens and they could just hop the pen, kill a cow, and that's it, they're gonna do it forever.

Right. Forever. But the ones that are reintroduced and assimilate in raw nature, I think those are crucial and important to that ecosystem. It is crucial to have balance. And there's some aspects of having the wolves back in Montana that's actually better for the elk population.

It is. Because the elk population was very overpopulated at one point in time. They had seasons where they were allowing people to shoot them in the snow in the winter. So like there were so many of them, when they're in the snow, like deep snow, they can't run. So you basically...

The wolves. No. The elk. Because before they reintroduced the wolves, they had so many elk. These elks were running out of resources.

And they realized like they're so overpopulated. We're gonna allow you to shoot them in ways that's not even remotely sporting. They're stuck in snow. It's called culling. Yeah.

They're just taking as many out of the populations as you can. And look, for the people that live there, it's amazing. You're eating elk 12 months out of the year. You got a freezer. It's looking delicious.

How dare you? No, I mean, if you eat it all the time. But don't forget the wolves also preserve the whole ecosystem because the overpopulation of elks, we're eating so much of the flora that the sides of riverbanks were eroding. You're quoting a documentary called, how wolves change rivers. Right.

Yeah, widely disputed. So a lot of the stuff they're saying is not accurate in that documentary. What is accurate is that balance is important. Yeah. But a lot of things are very overstated in that and it turned out to not be true.

Not a lot of the claims are not true. Because interesting. You can have a pro and the pro is it keeps the population check and it puts a natural balance to the area. That's the pro. Yeah.

This whole changing rivers thing. Some of it's accurate. Some of it's not. Yeah, but apparently that documentary was made by a guy who's into rewilding. And he also wants to rewild Europe.

So like, it's very romantic, this idea. Okay. But there is positive to having a balanced ecosystem. It's not positive when wolves get overpopulated. When wolves get overpopulated, that's what you get when you had Russia and Germany having a fucking ceasefire in World War I.

Because they were losing so many soldiers to wolves. They all united together to kill the wolves. That's a true story. But do you ever live in a world where you go? The wolves are part of the natural world.

The same way the buys and we're on the great teams before they eradicated them. No. Okay. If you had Billy. Imagine if you had kids and you were walking with your kids and you saw three wolves following you.

Yeah. And you didn't have a gun. How would you feel about those wolves? When you thought, oh my God, we might get taken out by wolves and I just thought they were cute fuzzy things that were a part of nature. I don't think of them as that.

I don't think of them as that. I don't think of them as that. I'm amazing. We need them. I've worked in nature.

I've been around wolves. I know they're on team people. You are? 100%. 100% team people.

I love all animals. I love them all. Yeah. But I love people way more. If it was between a person that I fucking hate that it feels a real piece of shit and I knew that they're going to get taken out by a wolf but I had a rifle, I'd kill the fucking wolf 100% of the time because I'm on team people.

But it's all like, the animals are scared of us. Good. Be scared. But Joe, isn't it team people that's eradicating all the animals as we encroach deeper and deeper into the Amazon jungle, the African plains? We're losing.

Look at the American bison. There used to be millions of them hurting across the prairies. And now there's isolated pockets. Right. But you know how that happens?

Look at the silver backerela. Look at, there's so many things that are losing to team people that we might not have Siberian taggers in 30 years. I'm not saying you should go and kill these endangered animals. I don't say that. I think they might change either.

We're not always. That's not true. First of all, the bison thing was not because of encroaching. The bison thing was because of sport hunting where these people were like, they were doing it not even sport hunting, market hunting. They were doing it for tongues.

You know what they were getting? They were chopping out their tongues. All that delicious bison meat, they let it rot. Then they were doing it for furs and then they were doing it for bones. What this is is people were fucking insane and rifles were fairly new and long range rifles are fairly new in human history.

And then also you got people on trains and you've got these same, now here's where it gets really weird. What's Dan Flores? There's a guy named Dan Flores who wrote a book on bison. And he has a theory. It's a really good one.

The reason why there were so many bison on the plains was because of all the Native Americans that got wiped out by disease. And it totally coincides with it. Because the original explorers that came to America in the 1400s, they did not describe these enormous population of bison. You would see millions of them on the prairie. He thinks that that came about because literally when the Europeans visited Native Americans, 90% of the Native Americans died because of disease.

Ninety percent. I mean a true apocalypse. Imagine nine out of ten Native Americans dead. Because of disease. Well that means no one's hunting the bison.

Right. So that was a primary food source for a lot of the Native Americans. And it wouldn't take many generations for them. If that was the thing that was keeping them in population, if they have a balanced ecosystem and the population was literally being controlled by these effective North American hunters. Yeah.

And all of a sudden they're gone. The population just booms and that's what he was saying. And then along comes the people with the rifles. And then the rebuild the rifles, they're finally sitting ducks, just sitting out there and they say there's so many of them, we could just shoot as many as we want. We never have to worry about it.

And they're shooting them for tongues. Yeah. Tongues. Have you ever heard of buffalo head smashed in? Yeah.

It's a town in Alberta. That's the real name of the town. The real name of the town where on the plains there, there was an optical illusion where it looked like the hills just kept going. But there was a cliff and the Indians would chase the bison along the plains and they didn't know it. And at the end they'd all run over the thing and the Indians would be waiting at the bottom and kill the bison with a name, the place buffalo head smashed in.

Oh wow. Look at this. No wild. Wow. They were on that plane and they couldn't see the change in the perspective so they'd run right over the edge.

They did that a bunch of places in North American. In North America. They did. There's one of them where they killed somebody bison that the rotting of them caused them to burst into flames. Yeah.

And so you know what that's like with whales when they blow up. Yeah. They explode. So the whole side of the hill is like black with coal because they, they, they, they, they imagine the fucking smell of something where it gets so bad they burst into flames. Bro.

What the fuck. Inston, var, Texas barbecue. They, the Native Americans when they were really good at hunting doing stuff like that. I mean, they're feasting. They're eating the best meat and they're keeping a population in check.

Now, when they all died of disease, that population stopped being in check. And this is Dan Flores. I think it's called, see if you can find the name of a jamie. I think it's called Bison diplomacy, bison ecology. I think that's what it's called nature also provides disease when there is no humans around.

Okay. Like long before the Indians started hunting buffalo, there were buffalo. Yeah. Bison ecology and bison diplomacy. It's a very interesting paper.

He was a professor of history at Texas Tech. Um, very, very good book. And he's got another great book on coyotes, coyote Americans. Coyotes. Are you a fan of team human?

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If team human keeps pushing animals out of business. Where, where we, no, I don't think it's the scales. We're at what? 7 billion now humans? I think it's more.

So at what point are you still a fan of team human when more and more of team animal is being eradicated? And I'm not trying to say we should. What animals are being eradicated right now? Well, I just explained how the herds of elephants have shrunk down to this. Tigers are down to a few thousand.

And a lot of that are back in a row. Are down to like a few hundred. A lot. Okay. A lot of that is not encroaching.

It's illegal poaching. That's a lot of it. But it's also encroaching. We're using up their land. Some of it.

But they have, like, elephants just invade their farms and eat all their food. But that's what I'm saying. How long are you a proponent of team human? People do we just. We just.

We have villages for hundreds and hundreds of years. But animals have been for millions. I'm on team people. If it's your family that needs that farm to stay alive and all sudden a pack of elephants comes in and eats all the food that you've been working for a year to plant and grow. What do you think we should just feed the elephants and go to the board?

I just want to know where you're staying. I'd rather see the animals succeed than us, if I'm being honest. I love people. But. That is a ridiculous thing to say.

That's a ridiculous thing to say. It doesn't mean the animals are going to go extinct. Don't you think we're a parasite on the back of Eden? Don't you think humans are a parasite on the back of this beautiful paradise? No.

No animal dumps nuclear waste or chemicals into rivers. No animal tears down forests except for beavers. So what makes team humans so great? Well, we definitely need to change your attitude. We definitely should do those things.

But I am. But I am a human and I like humans. I love them. I love you. And the only way that you're going to have humans is if you stay on team human and not say, I'd rather have the animals here.

They're just going to eat you. They're going to eat you and there'll be no more houses. But if you get to the bottom and get rid of humans with a press of a button. And that everything else could just live here harmoniously. Would you do it?

What are you living a fucking Disney movie? I'm just asking. No. No chance. I live in a simulation of a Disney movie.

You live in some bullshit Canadian reality show. Oh boy, he's taking another drink of coffee. Some of a bitch. You saw fly over this table with my rotten legs. You're a fucking team candidate.

I know what I'm doing. You're trying to ruin America by bringing in wolves. That's what you're doing. No. He's like a plant.

He's a plant. I'm asking you. You're ruining America by bringing in lions and wolves. Do you think humans are a parasite on the planet? I think we are very complicated and intelligent life force that values itself above all else to the detriment of the ecology of the earth itself.

So therefore we could do better. We don't all do that. We're not. Every company is not dumping things into rivers. If you had a cancer on your body, would you get rid of the cancer?

We're not a cancer dude. We're part of the earth. We are the predominant intelligent life force on this earth. Who predominantly destroys the earth? Cancer.

We're not destroying it though. We just do a bad job of keeping it clean. That's a fancy way of saying destroying. Well, most animals hit the button. Hit the button.

Come on. You want to do it together? You should have kids. I love kids. I love humans.

How old do you know? I'll hold you. Take a guess. You saw my legs. Take a guess.

I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I've known you for 30 years. Yeah. So you're at least that.

How old? He got to be 50 something. I'll be 64 this year. Really? Yeah.

Wow. Yeah. But I love humans. But I also... If you had a kid now, it might be a problem.

You might have bad jizz. Really? Yeah. You might have old jizz. Have you seen my legs?

I've seen the legs look good. What do you mean bad jizz? You don't... Oh, jizz. She's only 12.

You're only 12? No. How old is she? She's 30. Whatever she is.

Thirty years old. How old are you now? I'm with a 58. Oh, wow. Wow.

We look pretty good with your chest and my legs. We're doing all right. Right? Do you ever want to have kids at one point? Yeah, you know, I thought that at one point I would.

I thought that at one point I might. But it just didn't work out. I was married at one point, and... It's hard when you're doing the road a lot. It's hard.

It is, if you make it hard... But I never did the road a lot. I always mixed it so that I enjoyed my life and traveled and did stuff. and traveled and did stuff, so. That's smart.

That's smart. But it just didn't work out. And who knows? The road ain't closed yet, so who knows? It just checked.

Make sure it's good. Yeah. Oh, it's fine. And thrown into a spectrometer. Oh my god.

I just told you I was on only a fence for two hours. Analyze the jizz. Make sure it's good stuff. Wake and sperm actually go bad. Well, when it comes to autism, and maybe even down syndrome, there's some people that believe that the older the parents are.

And they used to think that was just the older the woman was. Yeah. And I contributed to those things. Another thing is also likely the father. They're also realizing a lot of, there was this thing that I was reading about miscarriages from parents where the father drinks.

I was like, wow, that's interesting. Because I never really thought that the father being a drunk would affect the sperm. But of course it would. Yeah. Of course it would.

And weed too, they used to say weed effective the sperm. But I don't know if that's. Well, you guys say it slows it down or something like that. I don't know. You have three kids.

So you eat it up. I don't know. On something. You give birth to a zombie. You give birth to a fucking jazzed up at our old kid.

Darren, I want to fucking clean this house. Wait, do you have any boys or is it all girls? No girls. Oh, wow. Do you wish you were out of boy?

Yeah, that's good. You don't want to wish you had a boy. You had a girl just appreciate the fact they have a boy. No, I don't mean eliminate the girls. God bless the three girls.

But if you had one more, would it be cool to have a boy? I'm very happy. I'll be happy. OK. I don't think about it that way.

You're a good dad. Thank you. That's something I picked up on you today. I think everybody should try. Yeah.

If you're a dad, you got one shot at this. One of the things is really nice for me is that I don't have to travel as much because I have a club here. When they were young, I had to travel a lot when they were really young because it's like I wasn't making as much money. And I was a little bit more difficult. And having the club where I don't have to do stand up somewhere else.

I don't have to go on the road. Yeah. So I'm only going on the road occasionally for the UFC. Yeah, you don't need to either. No.

You're done good guy. You too. It's nice to see Kilterny make a completely different career arc for all these people. And you're one of them. It's fucking taking you to the stratosphere.

It's wild. It's Sean a new light on my career. Yeah, it's sort of revitalized in a bit. You, Rob Schneider, Carrotop, the list goes on and on. There's Kyle Dunnegan.

There's so many people that it's just fucking launched up. So cool. When Tony asked me to do it two years ago, I'll be honest. I didn't even know what it was. That's hilarious.

I didn't know who Tony was. I'd never met him. I knew nothing about it. I was doing your club and they said, hey, we're shooting tomorrow. What do you want to stay on extra day?

And I said, for what? They go to Kilterny and I said, what is it? And I went home. Really? I had no clue.

I had no idea what it was. Are you not online at all? No. I didn't know anything about that stuff. How do you stay offline?

Well, I go online now because I started a podcast and trying to emulate you, but you've been on inspiration. Thank you, by the way. I didn't know about all that stuff. And so they asked me to go on and I did my first set with Tony and I think he watched it. It was the one where I had the chat book.

And then Tony, when they finished the show, he goes, oh, you're going to be guest of the year. I go, what are you talking about? And then I was guest of the year and then it just sort of all this stuff. And now I'm about to shoot a movie with Tony as my star. I'm going to direct a movie with it.

Was it Mass and Square Garden where you were pulling the things out of your pants? Yeah, the lines. I said I had Lyme disease and I pulled the lines out. Yeah. Whatever you pull the trophy out of your pants.

Yeah, an Oscar. That's when I went guest of the year. I have to pull stuff out of my pants, apparently. What is the movie you and Tony are doing? So my next movie that I'm writing and directing is called Rednecks and we're going to shoot in September, October with Tony as the star.

And I don't know if you do any acting anymore, but I want to offer you a part. I don't know if you're interested. Yeah, you don't like it. No, you need to get no interest anymore. I think I could kill it for a day.

Just running and do it in a day. Really? Yeah, something easy. Be fun to have you. We're going to film it.

We're going to shoot in Florida and Kentucky. Jesus. What have I got you for three days? What do you do? You talk.

We'll talk afterwards. I don't know any time either. That's what I do. I know. My time is rationed.

I get it. Yeah. Do you still have the passion to act at all or no? I never had it in the beginning. I only did it for money.

I loved stand up and I loved going to clubs and then I got a development deal. It was that simple. And on all of a sudden I'm on TV. I'm like, all right. But it was good that I never had a dream for it because I didn't have a lot of anxiety about it.

It was more fun to do. Me too. Because I'm just going to go to stand up. It's the same way. It's better that way.

Because the people that, like where it's there, oh my god, it's happening. It's so overwhelming for them. I see people who have anxiety when they're about to do their scenes and I was like, Jesus. Chill out. Well, we're so used to performing in front of audiences that for some people, the moment, for young actors, the moment when it's like action and you walk in and then you see that crowd, it's overwhelming for some people.

Yeah, it is. It's very hard for them to find that comfort level that allows them to perform at the level that they know they can. They might be really good actors. But the feeling is so overwhelming. They can't find the rhythm.

You know what the opposite of that was for me and I don't know if you had this experience. We were used to performing in front of live audiences doing stand up where they're like reacting immediately. We do a joke. They laugh. But now when you're doing a movie or TV, suddenly you're in front of an audience who are cameraman and directors and make it and they just stand there.

They don't laugh. And that became like the opposite of what we do. So when I first started doing TV movies, I'd get anxiety because it's like, well, they're not laughing. They're not reacting. They're just standing there.

It was all these technical people and that freaked me out a little bit. But I had to overcome that. Yeah, that is weird. If you think it's really funny and then you're saying it and no one's not. Yeah, they're all just staying because they're just making a movie.

It's not like the cameras are there by themselves. There's people behind the cameras and you're doing it for people. Like 50 people who are standing there while you're doing a scene with a cigarette in a hand doing coffee, shaking their head. Checking notes. Did that throw you when you first started?

Well, news radio luckily was in front of an audience. Yeah, that's true. So when you do this. But they were between the audience and you was all those people, I was in cameras. Yeah, but the people laughed at all the jokes.

Okay, good. They were good. But so that was to me was like a different way of delivering jokes. Yeah, it was still it was fun. Yeah.

I enjoyed it. I enjoyed sitcom. Right is to have really good writers. And that's hard to find man. Like news radio had that and really good performers.

But if you're on a bad one, you're in hell. You're in hell and you're just collecting checks. And you just do checks. Good checks. That's the problem.

Yeah. That's the problem. The velvet prison. Yeah. Those guys that aren't doing drugs.

The guys that aren't showing the hate. Yeah. You go straight two and a half men. So fucking Charlie Shannon. That's part of it.

And part of it is just like you're in that lifestyle area. But part of it is also like I don't want to do this. Yeah. You know, I experience that. I want to do a sitcom.

I'm bored. And next thing you know, you're smoking crack and running from the cops. You know what I realized too is with these sitcoms, it's they all keep borrowing the same premise. Like I did three different sitcoms and it's like, oh, now we're doing the episode where the lead guy is somehow dating an S&M queen. And now we're doing the episode where Jim gets his car stolen.

Like you start to realize like there's about 40 different episodes, but they all just insert them and sort of change them all at all. And it's really very weird. Yeah. It's like a recipe. So many premises.

Yeah. Right. And the first one was so amazing. Yeah. Yeah.

They didn't repeat any sentences. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right.

It's fucking incredibly creative and bizarre. And no audience. That's right. Another one. No audience.

Yeah. But the ones that were fresh were the ones that didn't, it was more like the traditional sitcoms that just plugged in the premises. And it's like, oh my God, I've already done this. But there's something to that form where it's when it's done really well, it is very enjoyable. It's very comforting.

Like I always thought, like I saw clips of the Big Bang. I never watched the Big Bang until I started watching it with my kids. I think because I had seen some clips where they were doing like retakes and there's no audience. So I'm saying the jokes would no laughs behind them. It just seems kind of lame.

But everything seems lame with that. Yeah. Retakes of news radio seem lame too while we were doing them. Yeah. But when I watched the shows, like there's something comforting about this kind of a show.

And I wish they still did them. They don't do them anymore. They're dying. Miss Pat is the only one that I know of that has an actual sitcom right now. Like a 3KM.

Just got a live audience. Sit calm. Wow. Yeah. I don't think anybody else does.

Or if they do, I don't know about it. They used to be fucking common as shit, man. Yeah. That was the goal. Yeah.

Yeah. But yeah, no one makes them anymore. Yeah. I think they've been knocked out of contention because they're so setup. Whereas we live in this world now where people just scroll real life.

But why? Because a dramas are still on TV. They're still a million NCI, whatever the fuck those shows are. You know what I mean? There's a million of those shows.

That's the Hulk 2018. Long order special victims unit. There's a million of those shows. So those kinds of same premise shows of cops and lawyers and all that shit. Those still exist.

The medical examiner shows, forensic examiner shows. Those shows exist. So how come? All these. a resurgence of rancher shows.

Now everyone's a rancher, right? This is 15 rancher shows now. So those shows exist, but no sitcoms. As the incredible Hulk one said, me not know why. I think it's a giant mistake.

Cause I think you can make a sitcom right now, whether Paramount Plus does it, or one of those organizations that streams, you can make a great fucking multi-cam sitcom right now. Yeah, I don't even turn on the TV anymore though. I think people are being weaned right off the television. We're in a transitional phase. I think that's not- You don't watch Netflix.

Dude, I rarely ever, when I used to go on the road, I would check into a hotel and turn on the TV right away. I don't think I've turned on a hotel TV in about six years. Really? I don't even turn it on. When I go home, I watch my TV maybe once a month.

If that, I don't even look at it anymore. So do you look at your phone? I look at my phone. That's it. That's bizarre.

I'm even weirded out by it. It's like, what am I doing? You never sit down and watch a movie? Rarely. It's very rare.

You should watch a movie. I know. It's very entertaining. People should watch my new movie. Can I say something about it?

You don't watch movies and you make them? Yeah. You know, fucking crazy that is. Yeah. What's wrong with you?

I'm crazy. I'm crazy. All right. What is your new movie? You mind me talking about it?

Please do. Are you sure? 100%. I wrote, directed and starred in a new movie that just came out a few days ago called Wingman. And it's on streamers, Apple TV.

It's on prime, prime video. And I play a crazy wingman that helps people get laid. Nice. Yeah. And it's with Jamie Kennedy, Russell Peters, Kayla Wallace, Evan Marsh.

Oh, nice. Shiva Nagar. Did you make this yourself? Well, we made it with a studio. Stardust Pictures up in Canada with David Lippa and Justin Levine.

It's a full on movie we shot up in Canada. Nice. Yeah, really proud of it and I hope people check it out. I hope you check it out. I'll check it out if you promise to watch movies every now and then yourself.

I'll do it if you promise to be in my next movie and we'll watch it together. It's an offer. Okay. We can talk. I'm excited to be able to do a little acting.

I'd like that there are comedy movies again. Yeah. That's nice. Well, that's the one with I'm going to do with Tony is full on. That's why I'm asking you because I want to see you get your comedy face in there again.

What is it about? It's about a redneck culture. And this is the part where you really love it because I know you love vehicles. It centers around something called a mud bog where guys in Florida jack up their pickup trucks and drive through mud for three days. It's not monster trucks.

They just drive through mud and jump and spray. And then the other part of the movie takes place in those airboats that drive through all the marshes in Florida. And you would be the mayor of this town and get into it with Tony who becomes one of these mud bog guys. So you'd be around all this shit. Good Lord, Florida is a different part of the world.

Isn't it wild? Look at these fucking girls. It's crazy. You got an old Camaro? Yeah.

This is what they do. Tommy, you wouldn't like to be around that. So the movie is getting into the world of mud bogging in North Central Florida. Yeah. So Tony's going to be the lead guy who tries to win the whole mud bog thing.

But meanwhile, the mayor, which would be you, wants him out of town because he's such a redneck. He doesn't like the culture. Look at that. Florida is so different. Right.

This is such a different place. Yeah. God. So we're going to have fun doing that. But yeah, thank you for letting me mention Wingman.

That's awesome dude. It's when you do an indie project, it helps to be able to talk about it. So thank you. I've got an offer after the show to do a sitcom. Would you consider doing it?

If someone said, listen, I think we could bring back the multi-cam sitcom. But we want you to star in it, Harlan. I would if it was, if it's all about the material. Yeah. Because me and you were older, I think as we get older, it becomes about how do we want to dedicate our time.

I'm not interested in just doing, oh, I got a sitcom. It's got to have meaning to me. Of course. It's got to be something where I think you can help create it. Oh, yeah.

That's what I'm saying. All those guys that used to work on all those shows, like Seinfeld and Friends, they have to still be out there in the world. Oh, yeah. In that nuts. Yeah.

And everybody wanted a sitcom. Yeah. We were first coming up. If you said, you know, one day, there'll be no more sitcoms. You'd be like, what the fuck are you talking about?

You would have never believed that. No. If you went into these rooms where they're making sex in the city and the single guy always going to say, guys, enjoy it, why you can? Yeah. Because in a couple of decades, there's going to be zero sitcoms on television.

They would have just laughed. Yeah. They would have kicked you out of that off and get the fuck out of here. You don't know what you're talking about. Meanwhile, that's true.

Well, this is why I love, I hate, I'm just going to go back to a quickly AI because it shows were evolving. But remember Joe, at one point, movies were black and white. They didn't have sound. Really? Yeah.

Yeah. And then talkies came and color and digital. So I love it that every form of entertainment is evolving and becoming. There's stuff going to come that we don't even know which I love. Me too.

Yeah. But I think sitcoms didn't have to go away. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, maybe not. But maybe so like the new weight, like your daughters probably don't want to sit out for half an hour.

They love sitcoms. They do. They watch old ones. Okay. Well, I was wrong.

I was really wrong. I'm hurting. Me and my youngest. I was in a bank theory. That was me and my family.

We watched that one. Yeah. Well, life and my... And then we watched Young Sheldon, which was the next version of it. Young Sheldon was really good.

It was a single-cam show. It was on Netflix. And it was Sheldon as a young kid. It was the genius kid as a young boy. Very funny show.

But totally different. Like really cute, sweet show, but not in front of a live audience. And I think there's something I loved doing news radio. Really good. Yeah.

And... But it was just because it was insanely talented cast. And we were all like brothers and sisters. We had so much fun. Family.

For five years, we worked together. It was so silly. It was such a fun set. It was summer camp. Yeah.

It was really fun. And the show, I think, was really good. Yeah, it did well. But also, here's the best part. It was never really successful.

Which was great. Because none of us got really rich or famous from that show. It was really... It was always like not doing so well in the ratings. We got moved nine times in five years.

Oh, wow. And this was back before the internet. So you could like send out a tweet. Hey, we're on Sunday nights now. Wow.

You know? And it was back also when nobody had... This is a... I just saw this trailer there a day. This is a spinoff from Big Bang Theory.

But it's not a... It was a little too old to come either. I suppose. But it was popping up. Oh, no shit.

Yeah. It's called... Stuart Fails the Save the Universe. It's a new show. It's a comedy.

It is a 30 minute show. So it's in that universe? Yeah, yeah. Even like the logo is like the same kind of... Wow.

It's on HBO. Nice. Wild. Who's created more bangers than that Chuck Lorde guy? Oh, my God.

That guy's created so many big sitcoms. He's a big bang... What's that? An article he wrote or I just read interviewing him said that those shows kind of died, because the office in a curb could have killed it. It's interesting.

A single camera stuff. I'm also thinking I would want to go sit and watch a taping of a show right now. How much would they have to pay your audience to do that? Right. Well, you only have to pay the audience until the show becomes successful.

True. I guess people want to go. Yeah. You don't really want to pay the audience because they're not as much fun. Like news radio in the beginning, nobody knew who the fuck we were.

But by season three, the audience was news radio fans. Yeah. And it became a totally different thing. It was really fun. And Phil Hartman used to do stand up. Oh, nice.

He had talked about doing stand up in clubs, but he would do, he was really good at impressions. He would do Bill Clinton impressions. He had bits, he had little things he would run. And he would just do it for fun. And, you know, we talked about him actually doing it in clubs.

And the whole thing was silly. Like Andy Dick would address the audience. People would answer questions. We had a good warm up guy. It was like a party that was going on. Everybody had a great time.

And that was after the show caught its gear. But it never was popular until it became syndicated. Then it became really popular. At least years was sort of popular. Every week they put out at the top 100. And my sitcom was always number 99 or 100.

So at least years was probably up in the top 30. No. One day, Lou Morton was one of our writers. And Lou every week would show up with a t-shirt, with a number on it that he would draw with Magic Marker of what we were. And one day showed up and said, 88. I go 88. He goes, yep. I go, no. He goes, yeah.

Fuck. Dude, I was 100 every week. What network were you on? The WB. We were on NBC. Yeah. Okay. So WB didn't have affiliates all across the country.

We only had like 60%. 88 at NBC is your barely alive. But still 100 hertz. 100. Well, they always tell us, don't worry. We're not worried about the numbers.

We know you got to find your audience again. Now you're on Monday night. And one time we were on Thursday night. We were in the friend sandwich. So his friends and Seinfeld, which was Paul Sims, executive producer of News Radio Famis called the shit sandwich because in between friends and Seinfeld, you would have like Caroline and the city and these shows that weren't as good.

Do you want to hear about Salt in the Wound? Yeah. So mine was show was number 100. Okay. It was called Simon. It was me. I was the star. I played Simon. Jason Bateman played

my brother. Look at that. And the lead girl, Andrea Bendewald, we ended up dating. She became my girlfriend. Her best friend was Jennifer Aniston. She lived

with Jennifer. So I would go and stay at Jennifer's house every night with my girlfriend. We were like three company and I'd have to sit there and watch friends with Jennifer, the number one show, well, me and Andrea were at the bottom. The number 100. It was like, oh, I mean, love Jennifer was so happy. But talking about Salt in the Wound, it was like,

oh, damn. Isn't it crazy though? But you're on TV. You're living a dream. This is one of the things that- Oh, it was great. It was great. The earliest social media

was the Variety magazine and the Hollywood Reporter. Yeah. That was like the same thing where these people would compare themselves to everybody else. Yeah. And I would show up on the set and, you know, like all these people loved to read those things. And they were

reading those things. And I started calling them the Devil's Rag. I go, why are you reading the Devil's Rag? Because they were complaining. I can't believe we're number 36. We were on,

you know, Thursday night. We would be number two or number one or whatever. And I go, last time I checked, I'm on TV. I go, we're on TV. We're on TV on NBC. There's not a lot of people

that get to be on TV. Yeah. Like, this is great. We're living the dream. So we're not number one. Like, you guys are reading that and you're forgetting how many people that you're

friends with that are going on auditions right now that would kill to be on NBC. But it's the Devil's Rag. It's the same thing that happens with, you know, you say, well, I just got a new car. I'm pretty happy that all Japigos got a yacht. Fuck. I'll be honest. I was like, you know, I was like,

I'm on TV, but I got a test. We got deeper into the season. And I had to sit there beside Jennifer Aniston and watch her number one show every week and old 100 is sitting beside her. I got to say, it started to seep in where you're just like, fuck, I'm on TV. You know, it's like, there are days on it just you can feel it not blaming her, but just the business. It was hard to sit at one end

and see the other one. But that's the way it works. It's the way it is. But you got to really just go around. You're winning the lottery. You won the lottery. You just didn't win the mega

power ball. Yeah. And I loved it. I got to work with Jason and I, you know, I was the star of my, I came from the suburbs of Toronto. Never thought I'd do anything. Here I'm, I got the star

of my own sitcom. Simon, I'm like, this is unbelievable. Yeah. I share your attitude. Yeah. Yeah.

There's a lot of them that don't work, man. Yeah. I was on the set and we were there. Like, so you'd go to Sunset Gower and there'd be a bunch of other places that were next to you. Yeah. And I go visit with all those guys because like a lot of them were my funny.

Many Clark was right down the street. He was on the John Larry Cat show. Do you remember that? Yeah. I got a little story about that when you're done. Tell me. Are you sure? You don't finish?

John Larry Cat, yell at you. So before I got my own sitcom, so I was in Hollywood, I did two auditions. I did one for Ellen DeGeneres's first show. It was called These Friends of Mine. And I was a guest star on the show with Molly Shannon. And then my second audition was for the John Larry Cat show. And

I went in and auditioned. And the feedback to my agents was John said, this guy wants his own sitcom. And I said to my agents, I said, you're damn right, I do. And the next gig I got was my own sitcom. Oh, that's like, Chad was pretty cool. So you think he didn't like you because you

wanted your own sitcom or you thought you were too good for his show because you want your own sitcom? I think he must have sensed I walked in there with attitude or cockiness, which I didn't. I just did the audition, but he must have been reading my vibe somehow. Well, that's you. That's how you want people that don't know you this Harlan, you've always been like this.

I have. For the moment I met you. You've always been like this. Very happy, very confident guy. You never look rattled to do a show. You're just like you're having a good time. All of us, like,

there was moments where everyone had a big show and you're like, fuck, real nervous. You were never like that. You were always like happy, go lucky. I don't know one person that doesn't like you. Oh, wow. Do you know how crazy that is? No, I'm not. I'm married.

But do you know how crazy that is? Like, I know every comic that I know has a comic that they don't get along with, that they hate. Yeah. Someone hates them or they hate them or there's some fucking fuck that guy that guy's piece of shit. His comedy sucks. No one says that about you. Do you know amazing that is?

That's a blessing. We were talking about that in the green room one day. We were talking about in the green room because after you came on with Demetri, I was like, I told everybody was Howlin. He waited the whole show before he pulled his fucking steak out of his pants. By the way, that's Nate sat right in front of Donald Trump. He was here. I loved it. I told you that. I know you did.

So that conversation that we had in the green room was like, who the fuck do you know that doesn't like Harlan? We all sat around and talked about it. There's no one. You are like the most universally loved comedian that I know. I have to defend Tony to everybody. Tony, yeah. I have to go. He's

a great guy. He's a great guy. Just like in that world, you have to understand the roast world. That is not the real world, kids. That is you're going for blood. You know, like if you're in a cage fight

and you elbow someone in the face, it's not because you're a bad person. You have to. That's your job. That's the game. If you don't do it, you're letting yourself down. You've got to go in and fight.

That's the game we're playing. Use the rules that we're under. We're all talking shit. Yeah. It's. It's when you see people complain about it. Yeah. I understand the general public

that's not aware of what roasts are because the reality of roasts are, especially for like if you're a 22 year old kid, the last time we were roasts on television before the Tom Brady Bros was literally 10 years ago. Yeah. Like do you remember the Charlie Sheen Rose, the Donald Trump Rose, the comedy central Rose? They sat him all the time. They were a long time ago. Yeah.

It's a long time in the zeitgeist. Yeah. So those things don't exist to kids. The kids comedy is joking about stuff. Comedy is Chris Rock. Comedy is Kevin Hart. Comedy is Louis C.K. That's

what they think of comedy is. They don't understand the jokes. Like this is roast jokes are fucking mean. They've always been fucking mean. They could be cruel too. Personal, ruthless, go back

and watch all those old comedy centralists. They were fucking brutal. They were brutal. Patrisian would just eviscerate the entire fucking stadium. Those things, the thing is like, you're a person and you're not accustomed to roasts and you don't get why those jokes are so mean. I get it.

But comedians, comedians that are getting upset about these roast jokes, fuck all the way off. Just fuck all the way. All the way. You fucking traitor. All the way off. You know what this

is? You know exactly what this is. You're a fucking traitor. You're just using this moment to try to boost yourself up. To try to knock down what's happening in these. You could disagree

with the content. You could say, I think they went too far with this. I don't think. But this fucking pretending that these people are actual racists and Nazis just because they're telling these jokes that are in a roast, fuck all the way off. Yeah. Don't suit up. Go out and play

hockey if you don't want to play hockey. Yeah. Like sit on the bench. But then don't bad mouth the people playing hockey. Yeah. It is what it is. And that's the game. That's the game

we're playing. We're playing this ruthless. And by the way, you know, didn't have a problem with it? Kevin fucking Hart. Yeah. Kevin fucking Hart has defended every single person that said

horrible shit about him about him being lynched from a bonsai tree. The craziest shit that they said. Well, you know, who else didn't have a problem with it is the people, the corporations, that put it on corporate television on corporate airwaves. So there's a whole subsection of the foundation of where these the platform that they're given. They didn't care about it either. They

won't do it. So they knew from the Tom Brady roast. How powerful those things are. The Tom Brady Roost was the number one watch thing in Netflix history. Wow. There's more than 55 million people

watch that thing. I got to say I'm not the hugest fan because I don't love cruel humor as much. But but I do love it that that Tom Brady roast. I feel like it kicked wokeness over the cliff like those buffalo. We were getting so woke and we needed that roast to sort of course correct.

There's two things that killed woke number one. Kid Rock gunned down a whole fucking stack of Bud Light Dance. That was so good. That might have been it. That might have been because they have to see the real financial consequences of being completely insane. People were fed up

enough. Kid Rock saying fucking way and how's your bush like that is that's a big hit to the stock price. And then people realize oh this is a micro set of people that are very loud but it's not the macro. It's not the general population. It's even smaller than micro. It's like micro micro. Not only that but the people that were in it. A lot of them

have been in ship. Yeah. A lot of them have been in ship. The virtue signaling is done. They got caught up in a thing that was like the way people were behaving and so they imitated what was going on. They're supposed to groups. It's a normal thing that people do but it

wasn't rational. And that's why it got shot down by Kid Rock. By the way what kind of gun did he use? I don't know guns. I bet you know what he used. I think he used an AR. What's

that? Can we go back and look at it? It's a assault rifle. Is it automatic? Am I automatic? I mean maybe

use it automatic. He's in Tennessee. They have some solid gun laws. He just blasted away. You kind of have whatever you want. How many in a clip

for an AR do you know? It's called a magazine. See I don't know. Canadian I don't know anything about guns. They bury a magazine. They took all your guns up there in Canada. Well we never had them. So what is he shooting there? Wow look at him. Yeah. Let's see the video of him doing it and I can kind of tell you better. That's wild. Kid Rock shoots back at Bud Light. How many views does this have? How many views does this video have? Some news reporting of it. I don't mean

you didn't post it on YouTube. Look at this. Oh man. Okay. That's an AR. I think. That's a magazine. It might be it might be fully automatic. That's not a clip. Let me hear it please. Yeah. I think that's fully automatic. Yeah. That's fully automatic. Wow. So he has some kind of machine gun. I want to shoot up a six pack of Dr. Pepper just for fun. I love Dr. Pepper. But now I want to shoot it. Some pop. Why don't you just go shoot something you don't like because it's kind of symbolic or something you're trying to kill. Wolves. Yeah. I love wolves. You want to shoot a wolf. We're not going back to the

where they are. Listen if wolves are the mountains and they're just being wolves and they're eating elk and deer and I'm all for wolves. I'm not an anti-wolf person. But I think you shouldn't bring them into residential neighborhoods and drop them off in ranches. I think that's fucking ridiculous. I'm bringing you back. But I think that wolves in the wild are important. I'm not an anti-wolf person. I just don't like people doing what I call ballot box biology where you get people to decide by voting that are never going to experience these wolves. Do you think we should reintroduce wolves to Colorado and all these people that just got back from Whole Foods like, yeah, that would be amazing. I heard it's going to help the sprouts grow and they vote yes and then these poor lambs are getting eaten alive. Have you shot a wolf? No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No

No. No. I don't want to hunt wolves. I don't. I mean, I shoot a wolf. I thought the wolf was like endangering my family. I love wolves. I don't like wolves. I think they're awesome. I think they're awesome. Have you ever heard a wolf howl in the wild? No. It's very

content. It's very ghostly. Even more. I know you've heard coyotes, but a wolf has this long how it's almost. I can see why Native Americans are so spiritually connected to it. It's very ghostly and it's spiritual almost. It's a very beautiful sound. No, they're amazing animals.

I was pretty good. Sort of like that. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. You know, if you do that, I had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had wolves. Yeah. If you do that in his house, they start howling. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They go nuts. Yeah. I would go over his house and father. Oh, what a wild animal. What a crazy noise. They look. They're incredible. They're incredible. That's so awesome. I saw one in my wild. They're important to keep. I just don't think you should reintroduce them to fucking aspen you assholes. It's just it might be fun to see a pack of timbers taken down a skier.

Like Charlie Sheen coming down the hill with Denise Richards and you think that's a good thing. Well, it's like take them down. There was a movie rip out there. There's a movie about that called Frozen, not like the let it go. Oh, yeah. It was with Liam Neeson. No, that was the gray. The frozen movie is a horror movie. It's a horror. I know all the wolf movies. It's a horror movie about these kids that are skiing and they get stuck on a ski lift because they forget they're up there and there's wolves down there. Okay. They get killed. The guy falls in his legs break and then the wolves come and get him. So you're going to get mad at me, but I don't movie like this one scary because I just know wolves to be skittish like this.

Yeah, you don't know what you're talking about. Like lions, leopards, jag-a-wars like forget it. They'll take you down. But my experience with wolves is there's more skittish around humans, but I don't want to get into it again. We can go to Arby's later and have a fight. You have a broken leg like that guy did in this movie. Oh, yeah, then.

Oh, yeah, then. They're bleeding and they can smell it. Okay. That's your dog right now. Look at watch it. They're eating them. They're killing the man. Is that Denise Richards? No. Oh, it looks like Drew Barry.

Spoiler, they live. Also spoiler, no wolves in New Hampshire. So bullshit. Yeah, there probably was at one point. Yeah, they kill them all because they were killing people in lifestyle. Yeah, yeah. You know how they kill them too. Most of them they poisoned.

What they would do is they would inject strict nine into horses and leave the horse carcass and then they would all die. Wow, they did a lot of trapping too. Those cruel, the snap traps. Yep, they did that too. I knew some old trap guys up when I worked up north and these guys, you might not want to hear this, but the way they'd take them out is they trap them in the leg traps and then they didn't want to damage the pelt.

So then they walk up to them while they're trapping. They just clog them. They'd clog them to death. Like other club seals. Yeah, horrible. Yeah, I don't like that. The clubbing seals man was rough. That was rough. You ever see those videos and the seals?

At least a wolf would run away. These seals, they're just laying out sunbathing and they walk up and just bam smack and pop their skulls. And then you're doing that for their fur and the babies. They'd smack the babies because they have that beautiful white fur. Oh my gosh.

These things are like a chromosome away from being a sex toy. They're so cute. Wow. Wolves are good. Yeah, you just don't want them in your neighborhood. They should be in the woods. I love them. I wouldn't mind if they were around.

You say that. You say that. You have a dog. I've had them. What if you came out and your dog was getting eaten alive by wolves?

Bleed dogs. I lost one of my dogs to coyotes. I remember the day you told me your pit bull went up and took out a whole spot of coyotes. No, no, it wasn't my pit bull. It was yours. It was yours. It was one of my friends who worked at a pet store.

It was also worked at a veterinarian's office. And he told me the story about this pit bull that came to the veterinarian's office. It was covered in cuts. Oh, okay. Yeah, you told me this like 10, 15 years ago. Yeah, it was like one of those.

You know, these companies that take pit bulls and they breed them and make them like 120 pounds. They keep breeding them bigger. They look like monster. This thing was a fucking tank. Like a tank. And he said it was covered in cuts.

They asked the guy like what happened? He goes, I don't know. I came home. He was all fucked up and bleeding. So he brings him in and they stitch him up. And then the guy follows the blood trail out into the hills and finds nine dead coyotes.

I remember you told me that. We were at the store one night and you told me that you just heard it. I was like, wow. That story stayed with me because it was so crazy. He said it looked like Vietnam because they were just their necks were torn apart.

Their legs were broken because this pit bull once he grabs a hole that he just starts shaking them. I know he's way like 30 pounds. Yeah, they're not super big. But they would do this thing where they would like corner an animal and they would trick it. They would send one animal out there to get chased. And so that very kind of dog would chase it and they would all come inside and tear it apart.

Yeah, they're really smart. They fucked with the wrong dude. Yeah. Wow. That crazy story. I remember that one. You told me that. I was like, that's crazy.

Yeah. Yeah. They're everywhere now. Coyotes are everywhere everywhere. Yeah. Oh, yeah. They're really cool too.

The Coyote America that book by Dan Flores, the same guy who wrote Bison Ecology, Bison Diplomacy. He wrote this amazing book about coyotes where he explains like why they're everywhere because gray wolves and coyotes don't breed. But red wolves and coyotes do. That's why you have those coy wolves on the east coast. Yeah. Gray wolves have always killed coyotes.

Yeah. Yeah. So when gray wolves find coyotes, they kill them. And so coyotes are used to being persecuted by the gray wolves and they just keep moving to new places. That's what they do. So that's why they made it all the way across the country. So when people were killing coyotes or people were trying to hunt coyotes, they just moved to new places.

Yeah. Oh, they're gonna tap. I see them in my front lawn almost every other week. Yeah, they're everywhere. Yeah. I'm in the Hollywood Hills in there.

I see them walking right past my swimming pool. I mean, it's not cool if you have a dog or cat. No, we'll eat them. But they are cool. It's a cool animal. Oh, they're really cool. And their howls are wild too.

Those yips in the middle like, well, they go off sometimes if there's a fire engine goes by in Hollywood, the coyotes will react to it and go off. They also keep the rats down. Like, so that's why you don't see a lot of rats. Yeah. They keep the rat population down. Oh, yeah.

If they killed off all the coyotes, it would have a devastating effect for the ecosystem too. There'd be a bunch of shit that would be around all the time now that they're killing and eating. Yeah. Yeah. No, they're cool animals, man. There was a girl speaking of being killed by wolves. There was a girl in Prince Edward Island about about 12 years ago, I think.

She got killed by a pack of coyotes. She's out running with her Walkman on him. She was like a promising folk singer. Yeah. They said that those coyotes were unusual because they were used to killing moose.

No, no, no, no. Yeah, the coyotes would literally they were going after a bigger game because there was a lot of game there. So they were used to packing together and like taking out the moose by attacking their legs. Yeah. Keep cutting out their legs until they can't run.

Wow, I've never heard of coyotes taking out a moose. Yeah. We looked it up on the show. This was a very unusual exchange. Yeah.

And it's one of the reasons why they think these coyotes killed this girl. And she wasn't big. She was small. Yeah. She was out jogging. Yeah.

But that's the thing, man. They don't have rules. They don't like, well, we don't fuck with people and people don't fuck with us. But the orcas seem to, they seem to understand what we are. They've saved people even out in the wild, like people that fell overboard. They've saved them.

Yeah, isn't it strange that such a probably the top predator in the sea next to the sperm whale, the killer whale could take whatever it wants. Yeah. And somehow instinctively it leaves humans alone. I don't really understand it. And that's why I talk about sort of the programming of nature to step around humans somehow.

Because it doesn't make sense. Humans look like seals or the same body shape, the same weight pretty much. And yet orcas, there's no documented kill of a human aunt by an orca. I know. Other than the sea worlds. Yeah. Well, they're so smart and their brains are huge. They're huge brains.

We just equate intelligence with your ability to manipulate your environment. So they don't have a house. They don't have cell phones. They must be idiots. But we don't know. And they clearly understand that we're different than everything else. But that's what I mean. All I think all the critters do.

So what we are. Yeah. Show some respect, bitch. With the ones with the guns. It's be-auch. Be-auch. Thank you. I mean, look, we both love animals. I know you love animals. I love animals too. I just love people more.

I love people the same. But if it came to deciding whether we left Earth with humans or animals, I'll be honest. This will sound mean. I'd give it to the animals. Why? Because they don't know cruelty. That's not true. They don't know. That's malice. Do you know? Listen, you're saying you're talking crazy talk. Do you know how bears kill things? They just eat them. They hold them down. They eat them. They kill them first.

But it's not from cruelty. It's for survival. Humans are cruel. Have you heard of Hiroshima? Yeah. That was probably less cruel than a bear eating you asshole first. No, but there's no intent with an animal. And just trying to eat you. An animal doesn't have intent. Right, but the end result's still the same. If you were getting eating asshole first by grizzly bear, you're not thinking, well, he doesn't have intent to be cruel. This is just how he eats me. Asshole first. This is where we go. But he has to eat you. He can't go to the grocery store. He doesn't have to eat you. He can kill you first. And then he'll eat you like a cat does. But he doesn't know how. He doesn't realize you're being cruel. No, no, no, no, no. He doesn't care. Right. No, no, no, no. He doesn't know how. He could definitely kill you. If you were a bear and they were fighting,

you'd have to be by the neck and you'd kill you. Like they try to kill each other. But when they eat you, they just don't care. Right. That's what I mean. There's no malice. Whereas humans, but the results is the same. You're not going to take comfort in the fact that it doesn't have malice while he's eating your dick. Well, it's pronounced gourd. You know that video? Well, the audio of grizzly man getting eaten. Yeah. Five minutes long. Oh, yeah. Five minutes long of him screaming. All those things just eating him by grabbing his thighs and pulling chunks out of his thighs. By the way, they finally just recently released that audio, right? Because in the movie, grizzly man, the director refused to play it. No, it's not real. It's wearing a hers. He destroyed that audio. Yeah. The fake audio that's online.

That's just fake. That's the new one. It's not even new. It's been around forever. But you listen to it. If you know it's fake, you hear it. You go, oh, this bullshit. It sounds fake. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds fake. Yeah. The point is like, yeah, people are gross and cruel. So are chimps. You know, so what they do to monkeys is fucking horrific. Yeah. You know, I don't know if they're doing it on purpose, but they what they do to people. It seems like they're doing it on purpose when they bite your fingers off and pull your eyeballs out. It seems like they're being cruel. You know, I think it's a primate survival tactic, especially primates that engage in war, the chimps engage in war, you develop cruelty in order to be better at your job. Yeah. But I think with them, they lack emotional crew.

Like humans, we have the knowledge to know something's bad or good. They just know survival and we engage in bad, which makes us a different kind of cruel. Yeah. That's a good point. Yeah. Did I just win my first argument? No. I mean, you're right. I agree with you about that. We have a certain type of cruelty that's not, you know, it's not like any other animals cruelty because we're aware of how it's going to affect other people. There you go. Yeah. They're not really aware of it. They just don't care. Yeah. You know, when they do those things where they communicate with chimpanzees, they teach them sign language. You know, they've never had a chimp ask a question. Yeah. Right. Interesting. Because they don't care. Yeah. They never like, yeah. Yeah. Why are you wearing clothes?

Yeah. No, there's not. You know what I mean? I never thought of that. Yeah. It's weird, right? Yeah. Can we get armies for lunch? Like, why don't they ever ask for anything? They don't ask. Yeah. That's what weight did, did, um, you know what? That's not true. How so? Coco, the gorilla, he would ask for affection. He would ask for love and hugs. I think there's a, yeah, but that's a request. That's not a question. Like, why am I here? Oh, okay. What is this bill? You're talking more about philosophical question. I'm talking about having actual curiosity about like it's environment. Right. I understand why your skin white and mine is not. What is? They're just not aware. How come you don't walk in your hands? Yeah. Yeah. There's no. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like what we call intelligence is very compartmentalized. It's very boxed in and comparison to our intelligence. We have the intelligence to understand this thing probably doesn't like being in the cage. Yeah. They don't think that one. No. Do you believe in the concept of a missing link, like something in between Homo erectus and Neanderthal and then us modern day is there? Well, I think there's a missing creature. I think first of all, the real problem is what's the evidence in terms of the fossil record? It's very incomplete. Right. And because it's hard to get fossils. Right. Like for someone to leave a fossil behind, you have to die in mud or specific conditions. So most animals that die, I think we've got to do that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah

How many versions were there that we have evidence of that's what we don't know what's the homo? What's the same here? It is Michael shan-kaw for the Russian Academy of Sciences and other Russian archaeology What happened we just got scrolled player. What did that was weird scrolled? What did it just do that was so weird?

That's so weird. It's like they didn't want us reading this out loud. What's the homo? We're missing. That's a good question. So

Archaeologists from the Institute of Archaeology and ethnography the Siberian branch of the Russian Academy of Sciences in Novos cebrisque Aka Demgorodok Investigated the cave and found a finger of a juvenile female hominid originally dated from 50 to 30,000 years ago Huh, and then the estimate was changed to 76,000 to 51,000 years ago specimen was originally named ex-woman So anyway, the whole thing is they found out this is go back again a Novel ancient hominid genetically distinct from both contemporary modern humans and from Neanderthals So they knew from that that is a new kind of human and that's just 2008 So this is 18 years ago. They found that so who knows how many ones they could find if they kept it Yeah, there's a limited amount of archaeologists that are doing this kind of work imagine if you had Thousands and thousands of them scouring Asia scouring Africa. Look, there's probably a bunch more that we haven't discovered Oh definitely so this idea of the missing link. I'm not sure if that's accurate Okay, but then the question is I'm glad you said that because it it's sort of illuminated me a little yeah

I hadn't thought of it in those terms 2008 a Taiwanese citizen pursed just a fossil homo mandible dredged from the seafloor the Taiwan Strait from an antique shop and Donated to Taiwan's National Museum the National Science attempts extracted DNA were unsuccessful But in 2025 protein analysis the specimen designated pengue one was published showing that it belonged to a male Dennis Oven Link was in an antique shop. Well, that's how they found Gigantopithecus too. They found I like that old lamp I'll take that plate and how about historic missing link how much is that? The hell I think it's just a different kind of person Yeah, you know and then interesting if they kept finding more of them maybe we'd have a better understanding of like what we're talking about but There's a giant leap that's for sure. Yeah, it's the biggest mystery in the entire fossil record is the doubling of the human brain Sires over a period of two million years well, nutty nutty thing that happened also in our brains grew well It's interesting to me too is that you do have some fossilized remains that are very very very old that date back to you know caveman era Stuff and then we have stuff closer to what we just looked at but there's that that one

Transitional where you think there'd be a traditional creature that they can't seem to find well They might find it they might I do I think some of these are getting closer They don't have like a lot of Dennis Oven bones, but there's gonna be a few more that they find I'm sure looking I bet there was probably a bunch of different kinds of humans the question is like why did we succeed and why Why are we so much smarter than all the rest of them? We should go in and teaking this weekend see we can dig up? Well according to that China right I don't care if they bought China or pottery. I just let's go I gotta wrap this up, but yeah buddy. Oh good. See you brother great to see you. Thanks for having me

Thank you for being here wingman It's is it available streaming is available everywhere. It's only streaming on Apple and Amazon Prime right now all over the world And then in Canada we will start streaming the end of June and they might even do 60 to 90 theaters up there So we're right at yeah wingman. Yeah, and good luck with the 20 what to this one's fun. Yeah, and hopefully maybe we'll see you there Hopefully maybe yeah, congratulations on guest of the year. That's awesome also. Oh, that was that was a year

Yeah, it was last year. Thank you buddy. Great to see you. Love you man. Love you, brother In 2002 Ryan wedding was an Olympic snowboarder at the top of his game Ryan stylist really got it and go and in less than a minute It slipped away, but he continued to chase the high Ryan James wedding he controls one of the most violent drug trafficking Organizations in this world. I'm Michelle Shepard and from CBC podcasts and the Toronto star the most wanted Olympian the most wanted Olympian available now on Spotify