26. Too In My Head to Feel Secure - When You Can’t Stop Questioning Your Relationship

Ever been in a relationship that looks fine on the outside… but inside your brain is running a constant analysis? Yeah. Us too.In this episode of Too Much, Apparently, we (Carly and Alice — two therapists who love deeply and overthink thoroughly) explore relationship rumination — that experience of loving someone and still questioning whether it’s “right.”We talk about attachment, insecurity, perfectionism, love myths, and the uncomfortable truth that sometimes there isn’t a clear answer. We unpack the difference between intuition and anxiety, healthy reflection and spiralling doubt, and what it means to “live the question” instead of trying to solve it.This time we talked about:🎙️ We’ve felt this thing too (and we still do): replaying conversations, scanning for signs, and wondering what everything means👀 What it looks like in real life: questioning love, fearing you’ve chosen wrong, and struggling to relax even in a secure relationship🧠 Why our brains do it: attachment patterns, perfectionism, intolerance of uncertainty, and cultural myths about soulmates🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏻 The different ways it shows up: all-or-nothing thinking, comparing, ROCD traits, and constant “what if?” loops🧰 Coping mechanisms: distinguishing anxiety from relational red flags, checking for real value mismatches, and learning to sit with not knowing🌱 How to make peace with it: security isn’t the absence of doubt — it’s building trust in yourself to handle whatever unfoldsThanks for listening 💛💜🩷🩵🧡💬 New episodes every Monday.🎧 Follow now to join the conversation.🧡 CONNECT WITH US🎙️ Podcast socials: \→ Instagram: @toomuchapparently → TikTok: @toomuchapparently → YouTube: Too Much, Apparently → Website: www.toomuchapparently.com👩‍💻 Carly Radford: → Website: www.carlyradford.com → Instagram: @the_sensitivity_therapist👩🏻‍💻 Alice Tew: → Website: www.alicetew.com → Instagram: @reparentingwithalice📩 Email us: [email protected] 🗓️ New episodes every MondayThis is a podcast that says: bring your too-muchness… we’re here for it.Disclaimer: Just a quick note to say this podcast isn’t therapy, and it’s not a substitute for professional support. We’re here to share ideas and experiences, but if you’re struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support service near you.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------relationship anxiety podcast, relationship rumination, ROCD traits, attachment styles podcast, love anxiety, perfectionism in relationships, fear of choosing wrong partner, overthinking relationships, sensitivity podcast, mental health podcast