269. More On People Pleasing

Episode 269: More on People Pleasing takes a fresh look at a topic I've taught before, but with new insights that have come from years of coaching preparing missionaries, currently serving missionaries, returned missionaries, parents, and mission leaders. People pleasing isn't simply about trying to make other people happy. More often, it's an attempt to manage how we feel about ourselves by seeking reassurance, validation, or approval from others. In this episode, I explore why people pleasing "works," why it's so tempting, and why it ultimately leaves us feeling emotionally exhausted. We talk about the difference between genuine kindness and people pleasing, why the same outward action can come from two completely different motivations, and how to recognize when you've attached invisible strings to your service, relationships, or acts of generosity. I also share practical examples from missionary life, dating, family relationships, and everyday experiences to help you identify what belongs in your lane, what belongs in someone else's, and how to give freely without depending on another person's response to determine your worth. If you've ever found yourself overthinking someone else's reaction, feeling resentful after serving, or wondering why your efforts didn't bring the response you hoped for, I hope Episode 269: More on People Pleasing helps you recognize the subtle ways people pleasing can show up in your life. My hope is that you'll learn to serve from love instead of obligation, trust your own worth without needing someone else's approval, and experience the freedom that comes from giving with no strings attached. As always, if you found this episode helpful, I want to invite you to subscribe if you aren't already, share this episode with your friends and missionaries you know, and write a review. I know this work will help LDS missionaries around the world and it would mean so much to me if you did. Until next week my friends.   00:00 – Introduction 00:55 – Why People Pleasing Still Matters 04:35 – Why People Pleasing "Works" 07:37 – Kindness vs. People Pleasing 10:09 – The Hidden Strings We Attach 15:11 – Stay in Your Lane 19:07 – What Are You Trying to Believe? 24:59 – Try a "No People Pleasing" Diet 27:23 – Give Yourself What You're Seeking 29:46 – The Freedom of Giving with No Strings Attached 33:14 – Outro   Website | Instagram | Facebook   5 Ways to Process Any Less-Than Happy Mission Memories Article: HERE   Get the Full Show Notes and Text/PDF Transcripts: HERE   Free PDF Download:  Podcast Roadmap   Free PDF Download:  Preparing Missionary Cheat Sheet   Free Training for Preparing Missionaries:  Change Your Mission with this One Tool   RM Transition Free Video Series:  3 Tools to Help RMs in Their Transition Home   Free Guide:  5 Tips to Help Any Returning Missionary   Schedule a Free Strategy Call:   Click Here