270 - Kimberley's Story (Part 6)

This week on the show, single mum Kimberley shares Part 6 of her story.  Please note that these contain sensitive topics on domestic abuse and violence. It is recommended you listen to Parts 1 - 5 prior to listening to Part 6, but here's a short recap of the past episodes. In Ep 263 - Part 1, Kimberley talked about growing up in a single mum household and the relationship she had with her own father, the night she met her husband, and how (what she thought was going to be) a one night stand turned into a very toxic and abusive relationship. She shared the story of the early days of their relationship, up until the birth of her daughter, and the red flags and abusive tendencies that started appearing. In Ep 264 - Part 2, Kimberley's story continued. She talked about how the abusive tendencies started escalating and she shared her experience of what she would later find out was known as the cycle of domestic violence. She also talked about how she gained the courage to leave him, though it was the first of many attempts she made to leave the relationship, and how six months later he wormed his way back in. In Ep 267 - Part 3, Kimberley shares the further violent and abusive outbursts of her ex, and the safety measures she started taking to protect herself (and how she perceived this as being normal), the financial abuse that had started getting worse, the isolation he inflicted on her and separating her from her friends and sister (her biggest support), his gambling and consequent debt that kept increasing, and his paranoia that kept getting worse. She also shares what happened when he moved out and back in again a couple of times. In Ep 268 - Part 4, Kimberley started sharing what happened in the final six months of them living together, which is what she allowed because she wanted to protect her kids. She shared all the crazy things he did and beliefs he held and how she always felt like she was walking on eggshells around her ex. And then how one day, he started telling her how easy it would be to kill her - that all he had to do was come over and strangle her. And then he taunted her – repeatedly walked towards her and then away. And then the next day - raping her. In Ep 269 - Part 5, Kimberley explains how she felt completely stuck with nowhere to go after calling the Police for advice and being told she could take an AVO out that would protect her, but not her children. She talks more about his violent outbursts and his sexist attitudes and tells us about the suicide threats he would make to their children. Kimberley also shares the details of the night the nightmare she was living finally came to an end and what happened after that. In this episode, Kimberley shares the final part of her story. She talks about how the kids had no interest in seeing their father (and still don't 7 years later after the police took him away), how she had no sleep for two years as he continued to breach court orders and she lived on high alert. She also talks about the court process and the supervised visits and phone calls that were ordered for the children to spend time with their dad. And how he would continue to use these phone calls as a way to torment Kimberley and even do things like bark at her. She also talks about what it was like at the contact centre for supervised visits and about the Independent Children's Lawyer that was provided. Kimberley also talks about finding out about her ex's new partner and their two children and the emotions that came along with that. And finally, Kimberley shares how she gained her freedom and the empowerment that has come from sharing her story.  She also talks about the impacts the whole experience has had on her, from a mental health perspective and otherwise, and how she feels about it now. And lastly - the next steps for Kimberley. Links mentioned in the episode: Listen to Ep 263 - Kimberley's Story (Part 1) HERE. Listen to Ep 264 - Kimberley's Story (Part 2) HERE. Listen to Ep 267 - Kimberley's Story (Part 3) HERE. Listen to Ep 268 - Kimberley's Story (Part 4) HERE. Listen to Ep 269 - Kimberley's Story (Part 5) HERE. Jump on the waitlist for Thrive Tribe HERE.  Download the E-book – Thirteen single mothers share their struggles, top tips, and their favourite things about being a single mother – HERE. To contact Julia, email: [email protected]. Visit us at Single Mother Survival Guide. And join the email list there too. Or connect with Single Mother Survival Guide on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Pinterest.