271 - Breaking Up With Perfectionism with Kelli France, Perfectionist Coach, Master Certified Life Coach, Author, & Podcast Host

Kelli France is a Master Certified Life Coach, a Perfectionist Coach, Founder of the Empowered Life Academy, Author of One Goal for 100 Days, and Host of the Finally Fearless podcast. She works with women to help them recognize and break free from perfectionist patterns– the kind that keep you stuck, burnt out, and constantly waiting to feel ready before you start.Kelli discovered her own perfectionism during her master coach certification and realized it was showing up in almost every woman she coached. She built her entire framework around it, including four perfectionist archetypes rooted in the nervous system's fear response — and the practical tools to move through them.This episode is a really honest, relatable conversation about the ways perfectionism quietly runs our lives — and what it actually looks like to break up with it for good.In this episode, we cover:The four perfectionist archetypes — controller, overachiever, people pleaser, and procrastinator — and how each one is rooted in fight, flight, fawn, or freezeWhy perfectionism is a nervous system response, not a personality flaw — and how it starts in childhoodHow people pleasing is really a form of control — and why it's linked to lying and manipulation without us even realizing itThe difference between guilt and shame — and why the shame spiral is the most damaging part of the perfectionist cycleWhy so many women don't even know they're perfectionists — they just think they're undisciplined, unmotivated, or not ready yetThe identity crisis that hits when your title, role, or company disappears and your worth was tied to all of itPerfectionist mom patterns — the panic that you're not doing it right, attaching your identity to your kids' behavior, and the all-or-nothing trapBody image and perfectionism — why women won't show up online because their hair isn't the right colorAll-or-nothing thinking, cognitive distortions, and the SCAM acronymThe "and" thinking — why adding "and" instead of "or" breaks the black-and-white trap"Dating discomfort" — what it means, why it matters, and how to get better at tolerating hard feelings without letting them driveThe two S's for getting started: Start Sloppy and Super Small StepsThe T model — thoughts create emotions, emotions create actions, actions create resultsWhy your imperfections are what actually create connection — not the highlight reelWhat to do when you want to quit — and why that urge is just a feeling passing through, not a factHow Gen Z is dealing with perfectionism — and the conversations Kelli is having with her own kidsConnect with Kelli:Instagram: @kellifrance https://www.instagram.com/kellifrance/Book — One Goal for 100 Days: available on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Goal-100-Days-Motivational-Journal/dp/B0CQHZ4K19Podcast: Finally Fearless - https://open.spotify.com/show/56CKDOAOuW5PGV27QjZLcl?si=03cef683f1d14f37