279. The Director of The Kinsey Institute on Modern Intimacy, Dating Apps & the Sex Recession

Dr. Justin Garcia is the Executive Director of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, chief scientific advisor to Match, and the author of the new book The Intimate Animal. He joins Em and Cass for a wide-ranging conversation on why modern intimacy feels so hard, and why he's optimistic about it anyway. They get into the intimacy crisis (why we can be surrounded by people and still feel lonely), the "all-or-nothing" marriage model that's crushing modern relationships, the real story behind the sex recession and why declining frequency might not be a bad thing, the biology of monogamy versus sexual novelty (and the three ways couples navigate that tension), why 80% of marriages actually got stronger during the pandemic, and how dating apps are breaking our brains by tricking us into thinking every person is disposable. Plus the stat that 70% of people become deeply attracted to someone they didn't initially think they would, why the "work on yourself first" culture might be keeping you single, and the line Justin's built his relationship advice around: the grass is greener where you water it. Find The Intimate Animal wherever you get your books, and Dr. Justin Garcia on Instagram at @drjustingarcia. EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE WhisperVibe™ OR a FREE Rose toy with any Whisper™ order!https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/honeydewme-pod Want to come to our next IRL event? Follow us on Instagram @honeydewmepodcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices